September 07, 2010

She must think she’s married an idiot

September 07, 2010/ matthew

Elysha: You know that you shouldn’t wash the whole container of strawberries at once. Right? If you do, they will spoil faster. Just wash the strawberries that you’re using. Okay?

Me: I need to wash the strawberries?

Matthew Dicks

April 2020
- Apr 15, 2020 "Blowing smoke" ends today. Please? Apr 15, 2020
- Apr 14, 2020 I do a lot of stupid things. I promise to tell you about all of them. Apr 14, 2020
- Apr 13, 2020 Normal is good but hard to find. Apr 13, 2020
- Apr 13, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling: Strategies for Communicating and Performing Via Video Conferencing Platforms Apr 13, 2020
- Apr 12, 2020 The silver lining in Tom Brady’s departure from New England Apr 12, 2020
- Apr 11, 2020 Beating cancer is great. Bragging about it isn't quite as good. Apr 11, 2020
- Apr 10, 2020 Not so bad after all Apr 10, 2020
- Apr 9, 2020 You don't like sleep Apr 9, 2020
- Apr 8, 2020 The Unpopular Onion Game Apr 8, 2020
- Apr 7, 2020 Never Have I Ever Apr 7, 2020
- Apr 6, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #92: Monica Malaver Apr 6, 2020
- Apr 6, 2020 Americans need and deserve answers to these questions. Apr 6, 2020
- Apr 5, 2020 Elysha on social media Apr 5, 2020
- Apr 4, 2020 Your meeting or workshop begins with a list of goals? Examine them carefully. Apr 4, 2020
- Apr 3, 2020 Your meeting or workshop begins with a set of norms? Be afraid. Apr 3, 2020
- Apr 2, 2020 Eyes wide open Apr 2, 2020
- Apr 1, 2020 Resolution update: March 2020 Apr 1, 2020
March 2020
- Mar 31, 2020 This is what a book should look like Mar 31, 2020
- Mar 30, 2020 The world looks very different atop a bike Mar 30, 2020
- Mar 29, 2020 How "The Goonies" altered my view on life forever Mar 29, 2020
- Mar 28, 2020 The Four Best Gifts Mar 28, 2020
- Mar 27, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling: Tom Moore Mar 27, 2020
- Mar 27, 2020 Let us never forget how we arrived at this moment Mar 27, 2020
- Mar 26, 2020 The Office brings me light on dark days Mar 26, 2020
- Mar 25, 2020 Proud to be a teacher everyday, but in this time, especially Mar 25, 2020
- Mar 24, 2020 You exist because of 15 cents Mar 24, 2020
- Mar 23, 2020 I’m not William Shakespeare or Issac Newton, but I still managed to discover something important Mar 23, 2020
- Mar 22, 2020 Find a way to say thank you Mar 22, 2020
- Mar 21, 2020 The paradox of preparation Mar 21, 2020
- Mar 20, 2020 Now I'm worried about the 7-11 guy? Mar 20, 2020
- Mar 19, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling: Ellen Feldman Ornato Mar 19, 2020
- Mar 18, 2020 What to do with your kids during the pandemic: My advice Mar 18, 2020
- Mar 17, 2020 My mother's death, and the unforgettable gift that two students offered to me. Mar 17, 2020
- Mar 16, 2020 If you're not doing Homework for Life, today is the most important day to start. Mar 16, 2020
- Mar 15, 2020 Why do people use slides in their presentations? Mar 15, 2020
- Mar 14, 2020 My immediate and not-surprising response to time on my hands Mar 14, 2020
- Mar 13, 2020 This is how your federal government has responded to the coronavirus pandemic Mar 13, 2020
- Mar 12, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling: Building a Story ("News of Divorce") Mar 12, 2020
- Mar 11, 2020 I have a bunch of jobs, and I want a bunch of jobs Mar 11, 2020
- Mar 10, 2020 Perfection Mar 10, 2020
- Mar 9, 2020 A man in McDonald’s asks me about Jesus. Mar 9, 2020
- Mar 8, 2020 Colbert drinks alcohol. The audience cheers. Mar 8, 2020
- Mar 7, 2020 Bacon is simple and delicious Mar 7, 2020
- Mar 6, 2020 Of course cinnamon rolls should not be baked in plastic wrap Mar 6, 2020
- Mar 5, 2020 Jerks drive expensive cars Mar 5, 2020
- Mar 4, 2020 The bad storyteller and the admiring spouse Mar 4, 2020
- Mar 3, 2020 Anyone is technically allowed to play in the National Hockey League, and that is dumb Mar 3, 2020
- Mar 2, 2020 Edith Green: 1922-2020 Mar 2, 2020
- Mar 1, 2020 Resolution Update: February 2020 Mar 1, 2020
February 2020
- Feb 29, 2020 Charlie is funny. Feb 29, 2020
- Feb 28, 2020 My little sister does a very big thing Feb 28, 2020
- Feb 27, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #87: Matthew Dicks Feb 27, 2020
- Feb 26, 2020 No more swing sets, please. Never again. Feb 26, 2020
- Feb 25, 2020 Thank goodness for Mommy and Daddy Feb 25, 2020
- Feb 24, 2020 Simple and annoying Feb 24, 2020
- Feb 23, 2020 My father's situation was hard, too Feb 23, 2020
- Feb 22, 2020 Write local Feb 22, 2020
- Feb 21, 2020 So many questions. A few answers, then more questions. Feb 21, 2020
- Feb 20, 2020 The Other Mother: cover reveal Feb 20, 2020
- Feb 19, 2020 Speak Up #86: Talia Pollock Feb 19, 2020
- Feb 18, 2020 A sink? Feb 18, 2020
- Feb 17, 2020 The show was good, but the restroom was amazing. Feb 17, 2020
- Feb 16, 2020 Happy birthday to me. Feb 16, 2020
- Feb 15, 2020 My favorite names (and my thoughts on name changes) Feb 15, 2020
- Feb 14, 2020 Winners Take All Feb 14, 2020
- Feb 13, 2020 Storyteller, yes, but teacher first Feb 13, 2020
- Feb 12, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling: Lael Lloyd Feb 12, 2020
- Feb 11, 2020 More sexy rumpus Feb 11, 2020
- Feb 10, 2020 Sometimes it's better not to ask questions Feb 10, 2020
- Feb 9, 2020 The truth about hunting elephants Feb 9, 2020
- Feb 8, 2020 Anxiety vs. nervousness Feb 8, 2020
- Feb 7, 2020 Professional Best Man (and the amazing things that have happened since I first proposed this job) Feb 7, 2020
- Feb 6, 2020 The Super Bowl halftime show and storytelling have a lot in common Feb 6, 2020
- Feb 5, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #84: Matthew Dicks Feb 5, 2020
- Feb 4, 2020 Parents extrapolate. Feb 4, 2020
- Feb 4, 2020 Super Bowl commercials feature a big mistake, a bold move, and love. Feb 4, 2020
- Feb 2, 2020 Moments of Note 2019 Feb 2, 2020
- Feb 1, 2020 Resolution update: January 2020 Feb 1, 2020
January 2020
- Jan 31, 2020 The library is the most popular cultural destination in America in 2019, but not for me. Jan 31, 2020
- Jan 30, 2020 This was me. Jan 30, 2020
- Jan 29, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #83: Ann Guo Jan 29, 2020
- Jan 28, 2020 The tough questions Jan 28, 2020
- Jan 27, 2020 Free The Nipple Jan 27, 2020
- Jan 26, 2020 The Samsung logo got my head spinning Jan 26, 2020
- Jan 26, 2020 Don’t eat the meatball panini. Jan 26, 2020
- Jan 25, 2020 Reaching across time and space Jan 25, 2020
- Jan 23, 2020 Go be a kid again. Jan 23, 2020
- Jan 22, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #82: John Smith-Horn Jan 22, 2020
- Jan 21, 2020 Feedback is always good, even when it’s bad. Jan 21, 2020
- Jan 20, 2020 Just a little mind terrorism Jan 20, 2020
- Jan 19, 2020 Jesus would not like these Christians Jan 19, 2020
- Jan 18, 2020 Leave my Diet Coke alone Jan 18, 2020
- Jan 17, 2020 Your regional dialect does not make you special Jan 17, 2020
- Jan 16, 2020 Comedy mastermind Jan 16, 2020
- Jan 15, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #81: Devan Sandiford Jan 15, 2020
- Jan 14, 2020 Damn, One Million Moms! You are so damn stupid! Jan 14, 2020
- Jan 13, 2020 I managed a McDonald's restaurant last night. I'm so annoyed about it. Jan 13, 2020
- Jan 12, 2020 Things I Do #15: I worry about the safety of Bruce Springsteen and Ruth Bader Ginsburg Jan 12, 2020
- Jan 11, 2020 "Jack of all trades but master of none" is not quite right Jan 11, 2020
- Jan 10, 2020 My "Sweet Home Alabama" gift to myself Jan 10, 2020
- Jan 9, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #80: Matthew Dicks Jan 9, 2020
- Jan 8, 2020 A simple way to not suck at life Jan 8, 2020
- Jan 7, 2020 Decidedly less than "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" Jan 7, 2020
- Jan 6, 2020 Patriots perspective Jan 6, 2020
- Jan 5, 2020 Cheering for alcohol is weird. Jan 5, 2020
- Jan 4, 2020 This does not look at all relaxing to me. Jan 4, 2020
- Jan 3, 2020 Speak Up Storytelling #79: John Cuyler Jan 3, 2020
- Jan 2, 2020 Resolution update: 2019 in review Jan 2, 2020
- Jan 1, 2020 New Year's resolutions: 2020 Jan 1, 2020
December 2019
- Dec 31, 2019 Annette Deguire: 1971-2019 Dec 31, 2019
- Dec 30, 2019 Worst present ever Dec 30, 2019
- Dec 29, 2019 "Santa Cows" bridges time and space Dec 29, 2019
- Dec 28, 2019 The story of our engagement Dec 28, 2019
- Dec 27, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #78: Storytelling Forensics - "Searching for the Holy Grail" Dec 27, 2019
- Dec 26, 2019 Christmas Day 2019 round up Dec 26, 2019
- Dec 25, 2019 My 2019 Christmas haul Dec 25, 2019
- Dec 24, 2019 The three gift you should want to want Dec 24, 2019
- Dec 23, 2019 Books in hotel rooms Dec 23, 2019
- Dec 22, 2019 The unopened gift is always the best gift Dec 22, 2019
- Dec 21, 2019 Makeup at the gym Dec 21, 2019
- Dec 20, 2019 Happily, I'm hard to hurt. Dec 20, 2019
- Dec 19, 2019 My plate is full. My complains are nil. Dec 19, 2019
- Dec 18, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #77: Live from Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health with Kathy Binder (Part 2) Dec 18, 2019
- Dec 17, 2019 One Million Moms suck Dec 17, 2019
- Dec 16, 2019 Make stuff Dec 16, 2019
- Dec 15, 2019 Tell me I'm a jerk-face, but in a measurable, empirical way, please. Dec 15, 2019
- Dec 14, 2019 There is nothing wrong with that Peloton ad Dec 14, 2019
- Dec 13, 2019 Write, damn it. Don't be forgotten. Dec 13, 2019
- Dec 12, 2019 The perfect gift for your child's teacher Dec 12, 2019
- Dec 11, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Live from Kripalu with Kathy Binder (Part 1) Dec 11, 2019
- Dec 10, 2019 Lyric problems: "Don't Stop Me Now" Dec 10, 2019
- Dec 9, 2019 The death penalty is wrong Dec 9, 2019
- Dec 8, 2019 Shouting at people in public Dec 8, 2019
- Dec 7, 2019 Intense signage Dec 7, 2019
- Dec 6, 2019 A measured response Dec 6, 2019
- Dec 5, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #75: Joey Meyer Dec 5, 2019
- Dec 4, 2019 Greetings Little One! Dec 4, 2019
- Dec 3, 2019 Moments of Note: Take stock Dec 3, 2019
- Dec 2, 2019 Madman Dec 2, 2019
- Dec 1, 2019 Resolution update: November 2019 Dec 1, 2019
November 2019
- Nov 30, 2019 Like father, like son Nov 30, 2019
- Nov 29, 2019 Speak Up #74: "Twenty-one Truths About Love" Book Launch Nov 29, 2019
- Nov 28, 2019 Charlie's turkey Nov 28, 2019
- Nov 27, 2019 Women's shirts make messaging hard Nov 27, 2019
- Nov 26, 2019 Deep, seasonal thoughts from my children Nov 26, 2019
- Nov 25, 2019 68 garments? Nov 25, 2019
- Nov 24, 2019 Truth Nov 24, 2019
- Nov 23, 2019 I don't like Anchorman. Nor should you. Nov 23, 2019
- Nov 22, 2019 Books rock Nov 22, 2019
- Nov 21, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #73: Storytelling Forensics ("Wet and Naked") Nov 21, 2019
- Nov 20, 2019 Makemake Nov 20, 2019
- Nov 18, 2019 Sometimes the old-school methods are still best. Nov 18, 2019
- Nov 17, 2019 Dolly Parton is very wrong. Nov 17, 2019
- Nov 16, 2019 Worst moment ever for an author Nov 16, 2019
- Nov 15, 2019 Things I do #14: I constantly assume it's nuclear war Nov 15, 2019
- Nov 14, 2019 Stranding small children on desert islands Nov 14, 2019
- Nov 13, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #72: Chris Gaffney Nov 13, 2019
- Nov 12, 2019 "Skip Politics" is nonsense. Nov 12, 2019
- Nov 11, 2019 "I don't mean to insult you, but..." Nov 11, 2019
- Nov 10, 2019 Warmer days ahead Nov 10, 2019
- Nov 9, 2019 These two posts make readers the most angry Nov 9, 2019
- Nov 8, 2019 Perfect pair Nov 8, 2019
- Nov 7, 2019 Twenty-one Truths About Love! Nov 7, 2019
- Nov 6, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Live from Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health (Part 2) Nov 6, 2019
- Nov 5, 2019 A lot of feelings for my children today Nov 5, 2019
- Nov 4, 2019 At least they didn't add an apostrophe to my name Nov 4, 2019
- Nov 3, 2019 Happiness through music Nov 3, 2019
- Nov 2, 2019 Optimism is kind of like eating kale Nov 2, 2019
- Nov 1, 2019 Resolution update: October 2019 Nov 1, 2019
October 2019
- Oct 31, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #70: Live from Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health (Part 1) Oct 31, 2019
- Oct 30, 2019 Can starting your day with a smile really change your mood and improve your heath? Oct 30, 2019
- Oct 29, 2019 Quarry thoughts Oct 29, 2019
- Oct 28, 2019 I could run a turn on 10:1, and it was unbelievable Oct 28, 2019
- Oct 27, 2019 Trump ruins everything Oct 27, 2019
- Oct 26, 2019 This is a hell of a schedule... Oct 26, 2019
- Oct 25, 2019 Direct but funny is the perfect combination Oct 25, 2019
- Oct 24, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #69: Marko Ivanov Oct 24, 2019
- Oct 23, 2019 Trump in food Oct 23, 2019
- Oct 22, 2019 That’s a long way for pizza Oct 22, 2019
- Oct 21, 2019 Unexpected benefits of teaching Oct 21, 2019
- Oct 20, 2019 Vermont getaway Oct 20, 2019
- Oct 19, 2019 Don’t eat children Oct 19, 2019
- Oct 18, 2019 It's real. And appalling. Oct 18, 2019
- Oct 17, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #67: Bobby Klau Oct 17, 2019
- Oct 16, 2019 My postage stamp mia culpa Oct 16, 2019
- Oct 15, 2019 This text message did not go the way I had expected. Oct 15, 2019
- Oct 14, 2019 I sometimes use different words based upon the day Oct 14, 2019
- Oct 13, 2019 Mean things spoken about my body Oct 13, 2019
- Oct 12, 2019 Yoda is kind of a jerk Oct 12, 2019
- Oct 11, 2019 Harvard's new legacy Oct 11, 2019
- Oct 10, 2019 Stop the madness. Please. Oct 10, 2019
- Oct 9, 2019 Die, suits. Die. Oct 9, 2019
- Oct 8, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #67: Matthew Dicks Oct 8, 2019
- Oct 7, 2019 Flaubert and the art of the day job Oct 7, 2019
- Oct 6, 2019 Look what I found Oct 6, 2019
- Oct 5, 2019 Stupid words for simple things Oct 5, 2019
- Oct 4, 2019 Which coincidence would be more coincidental? Oct 4, 2019
- Oct 3, 2019 Robots are coming for us Oct 3, 2019
- Oct 2, 2019 Resolution update: September 2019 Oct 2, 2019
- Oct 2, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #66: Carla Katz Oct 2, 2019
September 2019
- Sep 30, 2019 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2019 Sep 30, 2019
- Sep 29, 2019 I'm worried that Frost's poems will someday die Sep 29, 2019
- Sep 28, 2019 Why bullies bully Sep 28, 2019
- Sep 27, 2019 Lottery winners are happy after all Sep 27, 2019
- Sep 26, 2019 Sometimes the answer is exactly wrong in every possible way Sep 26, 2019
- Sep 25, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #65: Elva Guo Sep 25, 2019
- Sep 24, 2019 Fun facts are never fun Sep 24, 2019
- Sep 23, 2019 Cashews are not pleasant Sep 23, 2019
- Sep 22, 2019 Seeking submissions for my annual list of shortcomings and flaws Sep 22, 2019
- Sep 21, 2019 Compliments? Sep 21, 2019
- Sep 20, 2019 Deep Impact is a stupid movie Sep 20, 2019
- Sep 19, 2019 Definition of guilt Sep 19, 2019
- Sep 18, 2019 Washington Post! Sep 18, 2019
- Sep 18, 2019 Hemingway's Robert Jordan and his last words Sep 18, 2019
- Sep 17, 2019 James Corden was brilliant for a reason everyone failed to see Sep 17, 2019
- Sep 16, 2019 Bacon! Sep 16, 2019
- Sep 15, 2019 Trump has achieved a new low. Sep 15, 2019
- Sep 14, 2019 I'm not stopping. Sep 14, 2019
- Sep 13, 2019 Three strange medical stories Sep 13, 2019
- Sep 12, 2019 21 + 3 Parenting Truths Sep 12, 2019
- Sep 11, 2019 Grapes and novels: New ways of prying money away from the wealthy Sep 11, 2019
- Sep 9, 2019 Offense kleptomaniacs Sep 9, 2019
- Sep 8, 2019 Many traditions are kind of stupid. Some are epically stupid. Sep 8, 2019
- Sep 7, 2019 Why are they wearing makeup? Sep 7, 2019
- Sep 6, 2019 Parking lot artist Sep 6, 2019
- Sep 5, 2019 Little did I know that I was among giants that night Sep 5, 2019
- Sep 4, 2019 Four reasons why I seem to get into so many arguments Sep 4, 2019
- Sep 3, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #63: Esam Boray Sep 3, 2019
- Sep 2, 2019 Electrical conundrum Sep 2, 2019
- Sep 1, 2019 Resolution Update: August 2019 Sep 1, 2019
August 2019
- Aug 31, 2019 Siblings Aug 31, 2019
- Aug 30, 2019 I don't see stuff Aug 30, 2019
- Aug 29, 2019 Nostalgia in the Pacific Northwest Aug 29, 2019
- Aug 28, 2019 What's Next? Brand New Challenging Life Goals (UPDATED) Aug 28, 2019
- Aug 27, 2019 A great problem to have. BUT STILL A PROBLEM. Aug 27, 2019
- Aug 26, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: The Tragedy of Seattle Aug 26, 2019
- Aug 25, 2019 Love me a good sign Aug 25, 2019
- Aug 24, 2019 Speak to strangers Aug 24, 2019
- Aug 23, 2019 Since returning from the Pacific Northwest, I've noticed this. Aug 23, 2019
- Aug 22, 2019 YOLO is not new Aug 22, 2019
- Aug 21, 2019 Discount men Aug 21, 2019
- Aug 20, 2019 I am not experiencing enough stress (at least according to others) Aug 20, 2019
- Aug 19, 2019 My little girl is a storyteller Aug 19, 2019
- Aug 18, 2019 I don't return stuff Aug 18, 2019
- Aug 17, 2019 "They call me Matt" is apparently no good Aug 17, 2019
- Aug 16, 2019 Why I respond to Donald Trump via Twitter Aug 16, 2019
- Aug 15, 2019 Another review of Twenty-one Truths About Love Aug 15, 2019
- Aug 14, 2019 I know these men exist, but I don't know any of them Aug 14, 2019
- Aug 13, 2019 I am not a monster Aug 13, 2019
- Aug 12, 2019 Bizarre coincidences are not so bizarre when it comes to storytelling Aug 12, 2019
- Aug 11, 2019 I have no idea where my children get these ideas Aug 11, 2019
- Aug 10, 2019 It's gone, and I couldn't be happier. Aug 10, 2019
- Aug 9, 2019 Why do teenagers smoke? Aug 9, 2019
- Aug 8, 2019 Lessons are almost always learned the hard way. But not on Wednesday night. Aug 8, 2019
- Aug 7, 2019 Toni Morrison helped me feel like I belonged. Aug 7, 2019
- Aug 6, 2019 Is the hand hover respectful and thoughtful or a sign that the end of days is near? Aug 6, 2019
- Aug 5, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #61: Joe Basile Aug 5, 2019
- Aug 4, 2019 Friday night magic Aug 4, 2019
- Aug 3, 2019 You don't know people Aug 3, 2019
- Aug 2, 2019 I am Springsteen Aug 2, 2019
- Aug 1, 2019 Resolution Update: July 2019 Aug 1, 2019
July 2019
- Jul 31, 2019 The world's real apex predator Jul 31, 2019
- Jul 30, 2019 That’s a lot of TV Jul 30, 2019
- Jul 29, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Eric Feeney Jul 29, 2019
- Jul 28, 2019 The Baltimore Sun's response to Trump is astounding Jul 28, 2019
- Jul 28, 2019 Am I a jerk because I think this way? Jul 28, 2019
- Jul 27, 2019 Book love Jul 27, 2019
- Jul 26, 2019 I picked up a hitchhiker. Not everyone is happy. Jul 26, 2019
- Jul 25, 2019 The pre-rain date Jul 25, 2019
- Jul 24, 2019 Worst concert ever Jul 24, 2019
- Jul 23, 2019 Someone doesn't like how happy I am. Jul 23, 2019
- Jul 22, 2019 My hero... Justin Bieber? Jul 22, 2019
- Jul 22, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Chris Kriesen Jul 22, 2019
- Jul 21, 2019 I'm going to criticize you and then stop listening to you because I'm stupid. Jul 21, 2019
- Jul 20, 2019 Be flexible. Jul 20, 2019
- Jul 19, 2019 Verbal Sparring: If you don't like it, leave. Jul 19, 2019
- Jul 18, 2019 As a Disney shareholder, here are a few improvements that the parks needs now. Jul 18, 2019
- Jul 17, 2019 Bite, damn it! Jul 17, 2019
- Jul 16, 2019 Disney World Shouts and Murmurs Jul 16, 2019
- Jul 15, 2019 When Harry Met Sally, and When Matt Met Elysha Jul 15, 2019
- Jul 15, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Live from Miss Porter's School! Jul 15, 2019
- Jul 14, 2019 Ten years of publishing... TODAY! Jul 14, 2019
- Jul 13, 2019 Three amusing Disney moments Jul 13, 2019
- Jul 12, 2019 Best and worst of our Disney adventure Jul 12, 2019
- Jul 11, 2019 Perhaps we don't disagree on sleep as much as you think. Perhaps. Jul 11, 2019
- Jul 10, 2019 New favorite animal for a damn good reason Jul 10, 2019
- Jul 9, 2019 Sid from Toy Story was a completely normal person. Jul 9, 2019
- Jul 8, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Matthew DIcks Jul 8, 2019
- Jul 7, 2019 Stand up, damn it. Jul 7, 2019
- Jul 6, 2019 Don't tie a bow at the end of your story Jul 6, 2019
- Jul 5, 2019 Trump's Fourth of July history lesson Jul 5, 2019
- Jul 4, 2019 Important notes on this Fourth of July 2019 Jul 4, 2019
- Jul 3, 2019 This is the way to write a review Jul 3, 2019
- Jul 3, 2019 Meteorological adjectives are hard Jul 3, 2019
- Jul 2, 2019 Your negativity sucks. Shut up. Jul 2, 2019
- Jul 1, 2019 Resolution update: June 2019 Jul 1, 2019
June 2019
- Jun 30, 2019 Good week in the press Jun 30, 2019
- Jun 29, 2019 "On line" is not pride-worthy Jun 29, 2019
- Jun 28, 2019 Join me for storytelling at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health! Jun 28, 2019
- Jun 28, 2019 He's back! Jun 28, 2019
- Jun 27, 2019 Tell that kid that he sucks. Jun 27, 2019
- Jun 27, 2019 Trademark! Jun 27, 2019
- Jun 25, 2019 Pluto Jun 25, 2019
- Jun 24, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Mark Scerra Jun 24, 2019
- Jun 23, 2019 You must watch this video. Or avoid it entirely. I'm not sure which is better. Jun 23, 2019
- Jun 22, 2019 Is Exploding Kittens Jewish? Jun 22, 2019
- Jun 21, 2019 You hate you when you say this... Jun 21, 2019
- Jun 20, 2019 My recommendation to you Jun 20, 2019
- Jun 19, 2019 This place that I love will soon be no more Jun 19, 2019
- Jun 18, 2019 The last day of school suddenly became very interesting Jun 18, 2019
- Jun 17, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Cari Ryding Jun 17, 2019
- Jun 16, 2019 Proposed Father's Day laws Jun 16, 2019
- Jun 15, 2019 The utterly unnecessary letter of recommendation Jun 15, 2019
- Jun 14, 2019 Donald Trump is a traitor. In his own damn words. Jun 14, 2019
- Jun 13, 2019 Listen to Jon Stewart. Do the right thing. Jun 13, 2019
- Jun 12, 2019 The cusp of summer Jun 12, 2019
- Jun 11, 2019 Smile and wear sunglasses Jun 11, 2019
- Jun 10, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Matthew Dicks Jun 10, 2019
- Jun 9, 2019 Tooth fairy economics Jun 9, 2019
- Jun 8, 2019 Maybe some things won't change Jun 8, 2019
- Jun 7, 2019 We don't know how our stuff is made. Jun 7, 2019
- Jun 6, 2019 Nevers Jun 6, 2019
- Jun 5, 2019 Winners get ice cream. Losers get nothing. Jun 5, 2019
- Jun 4, 2019 Check out Jared Kushner looking stupid, afraid, and bumbling. Jun 4, 2019
- Jun 3, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Aaron Wolfe Jun 3, 2019
- Jun 2, 2019 Think different things. Just be nice about it. Jun 2, 2019
- Jun 1, 2019 Resolution update: May 2019 Jun 1, 2019
May 2019
- May 31, 2019 Celebrate yourself. May 31, 2019
- May 30, 2019 Stop complaining. It's killing you. It's killing us, too. May 30, 2019
- May 29, 2019 First hamburger ever May 29, 2019
- May 28, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Live Episode (Part 2) May 28, 2019
- May 27, 2019 What is Alabama thinking? May 27, 2019
- May 26, 2019 Things I Do #14: I assume the world has ended. May 26, 2019
- May 25, 2019 Someday sucks. May 25, 2019
- May 24, 2019 Terrible Twitter and Terrible Maps May 24, 2019
- May 23, 2019 Chess boxing, people. May 23, 2019
- May 22, 2019 Never again. But a little sad. May 22, 2019
- May 21, 2019 The most disturbing aspect of a Trump Presidency May 21, 2019
- May 20, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Live Episode (Part One) May 20, 2019
- May 19, 2019 Star Wars got better. Seriously. May 19, 2019
- May 18, 2019 A tennis shoe is designed for tennis. May 18, 2019
- May 17, 2019 Fight to ascribe good intentions May 17, 2019
- May 16, 2019 Storyworthy in academia May 16, 2019
- May 15, 2019 Elysha knew. May 15, 2019
- May 14, 2019 Charlie supports the separation of church and state May 14, 2019
- May 13, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Ted Olds May 13, 2019
- May 12, 2019 Checking in on our relationship... May 12, 2019
- May 11, 2019 Not going to the racist's house is a reasonable choice May 11, 2019
- May 10, 2019 Benji the Hunted May 10, 2019
- May 9, 2019 Just the right words May 9, 2019
- May 8, 2019 Fertilizer is tasty today. May 8, 2019
- May 7, 2019 A tribute to Chris Farley (and me) May 7, 2019
- May 6, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Kat Koppett May 6, 2019
- May 5, 2019 Can you judge a person by the quality of their spouse? May 5, 2019
- May 4, 2019 I live with a stranger named Clara May 4, 2019
- May 3, 2019 A suggestion for Teacher Appreciation Week May 3, 2019
- May 3, 2019 Today's Republican party May 3, 2019
- May 2, 2019 Attendance weirdos May 2, 2019
- May 1, 2019 Resolution update: April 2019 May 1, 2019
April 2019
- Apr 30, 2019 I was so angry at my wife, and then I wasn't. Apr 30, 2019
- Apr 29, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Matthew Dicks Apr 29, 2019
- Apr 28, 2019 I'm no scrub. Apr 28, 2019
- Apr 27, 2019 The complexities of baby naming, and some very bad baby naming decisions Apr 27, 2019
- Apr 26, 2019 Book launch: What are your ideas? Apr 26, 2019
- Apr 25, 2019 Things I don't own that make my life easy Apr 25, 2019
- Apr 24, 2019 The fabled land of Inbox Zero Apr 24, 2019
- Apr 23, 2019 Trump's stupid belief in the simplicity of problems and solutions Apr 23, 2019
- Apr 22, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Corey Jeffreys Apr 22, 2019
- Apr 21, 2019 A terrible decision even worse than my terrible decision Apr 21, 2019
- Apr 20, 2019 How to write for 14 years without missing a day and never run out of ideas. Apr 20, 2019
- Apr 19, 2019 Memorize some poems Apr 19, 2019
- Apr 18, 2019 I don't have time to save time Apr 18, 2019
- Apr 17, 2019 Last times Apr 17, 2019
- Apr 16, 2019 Religion on the decline. Thankfully. Apr 16, 2019
- Apr 15, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Jeffrey Freiser Apr 15, 2019
- Apr 14, 2019 Strangeness of Vermont Apr 14, 2019
- Apr 13, 2019 Try new things. Aggressively, relentlessly, and constantly. Apr 13, 2019
- Apr 12, 2019 Billions with a B Apr 12, 2019
- Apr 11, 2019 A picture is worth so much more than 1,000 words Apr 11, 2019
- Apr 10, 2019 Unfortunate restroom encounters at MIT Apr 10, 2019
- Apr 9, 2019 Theatrical wind chill factor Apr 9, 2019
- Apr 8, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Sarasweet Rabidoux Kelsey Apr 8, 2019
- Apr 7, 2019 The standing ovation has come to signify nothing. Apr 7, 2019
- Apr 6, 2019 I want to be the blind man with the elephant. Apr 6, 2019
- Apr 5, 2019 Thoreau on regret Apr 5, 2019
- Apr 4, 2019 Change of plan Apr 4, 2019
- Apr 3, 2019 Trump is an inarticulate, lying coward who refuses to answer to the American people Apr 3, 2019
- Apr 2, 2019 Resolution update: March 2019 Apr 2, 2019
- Apr 1, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Matthew Dicks Apr 1, 2019
March 2019
- Mar 31, 2019 This is underwear Mar 31, 2019
- Mar 30, 2019 Storytelling in the Classroom Mar 30, 2019
- Mar 29, 2019 Life! Mar 29, 2019
- Mar 28, 2019 I lost The Moth GrandSLAM on Tuesday night. This is how I feel about losing. Mar 28, 2019
- Mar 27, 2019 My students are ruining my chances at greatness Mar 27, 2019
- Mar 26, 2019 Spring! Then murder. Mar 26, 2019
- Mar 25, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Ted Zablotsky Mar 25, 2019
- Mar 24, 2019 Why you should not complain about the common core Mar 24, 2019
- Mar 23, 2019 Physics and philosophy at bedtime Mar 23, 2019
- Mar 22, 2019 Adults here sucked Mar 22, 2019
- Mar 21, 2019 19 Things I Heart: 2019 Mar 21, 2019
- Mar 20, 2019 A man of many sexual exploits. Apparently. Maybe. Mar 20, 2019
- Mar 19, 2019 19 Things I Heart (2015) Mar 19, 2019
- Mar 18, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Tom Ouimet Mar 18, 2019
- Mar 17, 2019 Most of us rejoice. A bunch of old, white bigots do not. Mar 17, 2019
- Mar 16, 2019 The middle finger is just a finger Mar 16, 2019
- Mar 15, 2019 Losers lose. I am happy. Mar 15, 2019
- Mar 14, 2019 Wisdom Mar 14, 2019
- Mar 13, 2019 I have opinions on a suggested 30 percent tip Mar 13, 2019
- Mar 12, 2019 The Other Mother: Another cover reveal! Mar 12, 2019
- Mar 11, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: John Smith-Horn Mar 11, 2019
- Mar 10, 2019 When everyone is you, it's not good. Mar 10, 2019
- Mar 9, 2019 The “Let's do it” button Mar 9, 2019
- Mar 8, 2019 My daughter's issues with Title IX. Kind of. Mar 8, 2019
- Mar 7, 2019 “Star Wars Always” saves the day Mar 7, 2019
- Mar 6, 2019 Standing up in defense of comedy instead of decency Mar 6, 2019
- Mar 5, 2019 Twenty-one Truths About Love: Cover reveal! Mar 5, 2019
- Mar 4, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #29: Matthew Dicks Mar 4, 2019
- Mar 3, 2019 You might be sick, but count your blessings Mar 3, 2019
- Mar 2, 2019 "Republicans buy sneakers, too" is not a reason to remain silent Mar 2, 2019
- Mar 1, 2019 Resolution update: February 2019 Mar 1, 2019
February 2019
- Feb 28, 2019 Surprised about my relentless opposition to Trump? Why? Feb 28, 2019
- Feb 27, 2019 Dumb geographical luck Feb 27, 2019
- Feb 26, 2019 I don't remember what I see. Feb 26, 2019
- Feb 25, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #38: Lauren Doninger Feb 25, 2019
- Feb 24, 2019 New employment opportunity involves contracting malaria Feb 24, 2019
- Feb 23, 2019 Wake up call Feb 23, 2019
- Feb 22, 2019 Great news, greater advice, and a cage Feb 22, 2019
- Feb 21, 2019 My version of self care might seem despicable and disgraceful, but I disagree. Feb 21, 2019
- Feb 20, 2019 Do you know who Madame CJ Walker is? Feb 20, 2019
- Feb 19, 2019 Advice from The Beatles Feb 19, 2019
- Feb 18, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #37: Steve Brouse Feb 18, 2019
- Feb 17, 2019 Why you should embrace every snow day Feb 17, 2019
- Feb 16, 2019 A perfect collection of birthday presents Feb 16, 2019
- Feb 15, 2019 I leveled up. Feb 15, 2019
- Feb 14, 2019 The worst thing about Valentine's Day Feb 14, 2019
- Feb 13, 2019 My binder clip IQ test Feb 13, 2019
- Feb 12, 2019 I did not speak like this when I was ten years old. Feb 12, 2019
- Feb 11, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling: Marie Greene Feb 11, 2019
- Feb 10, 2019 This map is terrible. So is this administration. Feb 10, 2019
- Feb 9, 2019 Spielberg didn't hire me. Big mistake. Feb 9, 2019
- Feb 8, 2019 Why the Kit Kat is a terrible candy bar Feb 8, 2019
- Feb 7, 2019 Storyworthy: The Illustrated compendium Feb 7, 2019
- Feb 6, 2019 Trump demonstrates his ineffectiveness with startling clarity Feb 6, 2019
- Feb 5, 2019 Gratitude and perspective on the eve of the Super Bowl Feb 5, 2019
- Feb 4, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #35: Ophira Eisenberg Feb 4, 2019
- Feb 3, 2019 Bravery beyond compare Feb 3, 2019
- Feb 2, 2019 An answer to the stupid question, "How can it be so cold if global warming is real?" Feb 2, 2019
- Feb 1, 2019 Resolution update: January 2019 Feb 1, 2019
January 2019
- Jan 31, 2019 Overused, hackneyed, and stupid Jan 31, 2019
- Jan 30, 2019 Being critical doesn't mean I can't have fun. Jan 30, 2019
- Jan 29, 2019 No straw but plenty of lemon? Absolutely stupid. Jan 29, 2019
- Jan 28, 2019 Speak Up #34: Chion Wolf Jan 28, 2019
- Jan 27, 2019 Wonder Woman and Mary Poppins Returns: Two excellent films with stupid, sexist endings Jan 27, 2019
- Jan 26, 2019 Worst reaction to a gift ever Jan 26, 2019
- Jan 25, 2019 Clara turns 10 years-old today. Jan 25, 2019
- Jan 24, 2019 They love themselves more than they love their children. Jan 24, 2019
- Jan 23, 2019 Judge yourself by who hates you Jan 23, 2019
- Jan 22, 2019 Charlie can kiss all he wants. He just doesn't want to. Jan 22, 2019
- Jan 21, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #33: Bobbi Klau Jan 21, 2019
- Jan 20, 2019 Patriots playoff presumptions Jan 20, 2019
- Jan 20, 2019 Snoop Dog thanked Snoop Dog. Jan 20, 2019
- Jan 19, 2019 14 “safe” changes I’d make if I could travel back in time Jan 19, 2019
- Jan 18, 2019 Three commercials. Five minutes. Many, many laughs and perhaps a little inspiration, too. Jan 18, 2019
- Jan 17, 2019 Karen Pence is a bigot, but this is not news. Jan 17, 2019
- Jan 16, 2019 Kids get mad at "Bohemian Rhapsody" Jan 16, 2019
- Jan 15, 2019 7 bits of parenting advice that I stand by without reservation Jan 15, 2019
- Jan 14, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #32: Tom Reed Swale Jan 14, 2019
- Jan 13, 2019 Hurting children because you are stupid Jan 13, 2019
- Jan 12, 2019 I have a new job. And two simple strategies that helped me land it. Jan 12, 2019
- Jan 11, 2019 The ongoing lies of the Trump administration regarding the border wall paint a clear picture Jan 11, 2019
- Jan 10, 2019 Dad is clearly an idiot Jan 10, 2019
- Jan 9, 2019 Eric Trump blocked me on Twitter Jan 9, 2019
- Jan 8, 2019 Silver linings can be quite lovely Jan 8, 2019
- Jan 7, 2019 Speak Up Storytelling #31: David Ring Jan 7, 2019
- Jan 6, 2019 Old me is okay, too. Jan 6, 2019
- Jan 5, 2019 13 was not a good number in 1989. It's especially bad in 2019. Jan 5, 2019
- Jan 4, 2019 Things I Do #13: I turn on the passenger seat heater in my car on especially cold days Jan 4, 2019
- Jan 3, 2019 A man who should know better is worried about balance Jan 3, 2019
- Jan 2, 2019 New Year’s Resolutions 2019 Jan 2, 2019
- Jan 1, 2019 Resolution update: 2018 in review Jan 1, 2019
December 2018
- Dec 31, 2018 Moments of Note 2018 Dec 31, 2018
- Dec 31, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Chuck Fedolfi Dec 31, 2018
- Dec 30, 2018 Find your people Dec 30, 2018
- Dec 29, 2018 I went to see Hamilton last night despite the ridiculous hype that accompanies it. Dec 29, 2018
- Dec 29, 2018 I engaged with celebrity culture for a month. Here is what I discovered. Dec 29, 2018
- Dec 28, 2018 Time to set some goals for 2019. And perhaps a goal or two for me, too. Dec 28, 2018
- Dec 27, 2018 I was visited by the Ghost of Christmas Yet-to-Come. Kind of. Dec 27, 2018
- Dec 26, 2018 My 2018 Christmas haul Dec 26, 2018
- Dec 25, 2018 Just before all the good stuff is the real good stuff Dec 25, 2018
- Dec 24, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Christina Fedolfi Dec 24, 2018
- Dec 23, 2018 Be different Dec 23, 2018
- Dec 22, 2018 A simple suggestion to improve 2018 and beyond Dec 22, 2018
- Dec 21, 2018 Not a single one of them escaped alive Dec 21, 2018
- Dec 20, 2018 A beautiful act of revenge. Plus glitter. Dec 20, 2018
- Dec 19, 2018 Roman numerals are stupid Dec 19, 2018
- Dec 18, 2018 Let the anger go Dec 18, 2018
- Dec 17, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Erica Donahue Dec 17, 2018
- Dec 16, 2018 Look! Real American heroes! And no capes! Dec 16, 2018
- Dec 15, 2018 Dane Best: Child hero Dec 15, 2018
- Dec 14, 2018 Thank goodness that I'm smart enough to listen to my wife Dec 14, 2018
- Dec 13, 2018 Finding a new friend thanks to self expression and some scabies Dec 13, 2018
- Dec 12, 2018 A bittersweet moment for a storyteller, and a magical night for all of us Dec 12, 2018
- Dec 11, 2018 Demographics tell the story Dec 11, 2018
- Dec 10, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #4: Sam Carley [rebroadcast] Dec 10, 2018
- Dec 9, 2018 The magic of film on film Dec 9, 2018
- Dec 8, 2018 The curtain raised on peeing with girls Dec 8, 2018
- Dec 7, 2018 Batman is depressed. Also, you are bad or good depending on how you eat your lunch. Dec 7, 2018
- Dec 6, 2018 The worst part of the Christmas season Dec 6, 2018
- Dec 5, 2018 These folks get it. Dec 5, 2018
- Dec 4, 2018 A Patriots fan becomes an honest-to-goodness Patriot, and I'll never forget it. Dec 4, 2018
- Dec 3, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Kathy Binder Dec 3, 2018
- Dec 2, 2018 Be happy for others, damn it. Dec 2, 2018
- Dec 1, 2018 Resolution update: November 2018 Dec 1, 2018
November 2018
- Nov 30, 2018 Changing minds. Occasionally. Nov 30, 2018
- Nov 29, 2018 Spy magazine's prank from 30 years ago is more remarkable now than it was then. Nov 29, 2018
- Nov 28, 2018 Dr. Seuss's The Grinch is feminist and lovely. Nov 28, 2018
- Nov 27, 2018 Don't sleep on Die Hard 2 Nov 27, 2018
- Nov 26, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Linda Storms Nov 26, 2018
- Nov 25, 2018 The life cycle of a human being through the eyes of a six year-old boy Nov 25, 2018
- Nov 25, 2018 Trump's Thanksgiving Day hissy-fit Nov 25, 2018
- Nov 24, 2018 I’ll be speaking at the NYC Public Library Main Branch alongside storyteller Erin Barker… join us! Nov 24, 2018
- Nov 24, 2018 Important notes on the phrase "scantily clad" Nov 24, 2018
- Nov 23, 2018 Baptism as a threat Nov 23, 2018
- Nov 22, 2018 A solution to arguing on Thanksgiving Day Nov 22, 2018
- Nov 21, 2018 Elton returns. Nov 21, 2018
- Nov 20, 2018 A beautiful princess Nov 20, 2018
- Nov 19, 2018 My blog is celebrating its 10th anniversary today! Nov 19, 2018
- Nov 19, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling [rebroadcast]: Renae Edge Nov 19, 2018
- Nov 18, 2018 Just another Saturday night Nov 18, 2018
- Nov 17, 2018 "I had nothing else to do" Nov 17, 2018
- Nov 16, 2018 My son, the conceptual percussionist Nov 16, 2018
- Nov 15, 2018 Trying to tell me something? Nov 15, 2018
- Nov 14, 2018 What is the meaning of life? Nov 14, 2018
- Nov 13, 2018 Get Storyworthy for less than a dollar! Nov 13, 2018
- Nov 13, 2018 Trump has solutions for rising oil prices, a falling stock market, and the California wildfires. Thank goodness! Nov 13, 2018
- Nov 12, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Jenny Steadman (with special guest Danielle Dnes) Nov 12, 2018
- Nov 11, 2018 How I fight crazy, strange, and beautiful people Nov 11, 2018
- Nov 10, 2018 I had a terrifying Uber right in Florida last night. Nov 10, 2018
- Nov 9, 2018 News of a pending divorce Nov 9, 2018
- Nov 8, 2018 Smart cat. Terrible skill. Nov 8, 2018
- Nov 7, 2018 She killed Springsteen Nov 7, 2018
- Nov 6, 2018 Today I cast my vote on behalf of people who need it far more than me Nov 6, 2018
- Nov 5, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #24: Erin Barker Nov 5, 2018
- Nov 4, 2018 Steve Bannon is worried about the future of America. I hope and pray that he is right. Nov 4, 2018
- Nov 3, 2018 The truth about immigrants and the American economy Nov 3, 2018
- Nov 2, 2018 My wife is a teacher again. Nov 2, 2018
- Nov 1, 2018 Resolution Update: October 2018 Nov 1, 2018
October 2018
- Oct 31, 2018 Reach for the masses... Oct 31, 2018
- Oct 30, 2018 Trump can't speak articulately., and it should scare the hell out of us. Oct 30, 2018
- Oct 29, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #23: Laura Terranova Oct 29, 2018
- Oct 28, 2018 Terrorists are cowards. Let them know it. Oct 28, 2018
- Oct 27, 2018 Charlie lost his first tooth. Also, a lot more happened. Oct 27, 2018
- Oct 26, 2018 Piñatas suck. Oct 26, 2018
- Oct 25, 2018 Perhaps the stupidest thing that America does Oct 25, 2018
- Oct 24, 2018 Why are you doing this to me? Oct 24, 2018
- Oct 23, 2018 How dare you? Oct 23, 2018
- Oct 22, 2018 Many jobs with one important thing in common Oct 22, 2018
- Oct 22, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #22: Q&A catch-up Oct 22, 2018
- Oct 21, 2018 "Ask a Teacher" has become a permanent gig of sorts, and perhaps another step to my lifelong dream Oct 21, 2018
- Oct 20, 2018 Speak Up #60 was a big night Oct 20, 2018
- Oct 19, 2018 What inappropriate things did I put in my mouth? Oct 19, 2018
- Oct 18, 2018 I threw away my bathrobe after wearing it zero times Oct 18, 2018
- Oct 17, 2018 This sign is amusing but otherwise pointless Oct 17, 2018
- Oct 16, 2018 Own your domain, dummy Oct 16, 2018
- Oct 15, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #21: Don Picard Oct 15, 2018
- Oct 14, 2018 Brett Kavanaugh and the photo that will never go away Oct 14, 2018
- Oct 13, 2018 Matilda vs. Donald Trump Oct 13, 2018
- Oct 12, 2018 What is my obstacle? Oct 12, 2018
- Oct 11, 2018 Turkish publishers offer a small bonus to their readers Oct 11, 2018
- Oct 10, 2018 Eric Trump doesn't like me Oct 10, 2018
- Oct 9, 2018 I love my jobs. Oct 9, 2018
- Oct 8, 2018 The most re-watched movies of all time Oct 8, 2018
- Oct 7, 2018 The mystery of irregular verbs explained Oct 7, 2018
- Oct 6, 2018 First words this morning Oct 6, 2018
- Oct 5, 2018 Americans believe this Oct 5, 2018
- Oct 4, 2018 Ignoring your reviews is dumb Oct 4, 2018
- Oct 3, 2018 My children show me a world I often fail to see Oct 3, 2018
- Oct 2, 2018 Trump is many things, but let's not forget this. Oct 2, 2018
- Oct 1, 2018 Resolution update: September 2018 Oct 1, 2018
- Oct 1, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Valerie Gordon Oct 1, 2018
September 2018
- Sep 30, 2018 How to handle a troll Sep 30, 2018
- Sep 29, 2018 Two statistics that can change the course of a lifetime Sep 29, 2018
- Sep 28, 2018 Honest but kind. No, honest is kind. Sep 28, 2018
- Sep 27, 2018 The Republican own this self-acknowledged sex offender President Sep 27, 2018
- Sep 26, 2018 Many jobs. Many, many more dreams. Sep 26, 2018
- Sep 25, 2018 Behold: The inventor of the chocolate chip cookie Sep 25, 2018
- Sep 24, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: Ron Apter Sep 24, 2018
- Sep 23, 2018 A DJ, a preacher, and a bank robber, all rolled into one Sep 23, 2018
- Sep 22, 2018 My son loves his mother and sister. Period. Sep 22, 2018
- Sep 21, 2018 I don’t drink. For my health and other good reasons. Sep 21, 2018
- Sep 20, 2018 New Jersey is different and dumb. Sep 20, 2018
- Sep 19, 2018 Not every service dog is equal Sep 19, 2018
- Sep 18, 2018 Why people think women aren't as funny as men (maybe) Sep 18, 2018
- Sep 17, 2018 Feline interference Sep 17, 2018
- Sep 17, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #17: Robin Gelfenbien Sep 17, 2018
- Sep 16, 2018 Serena is beautiful. You are a terrible human being. Sep 16, 2018
- Sep 15, 2018 Names are interesting. And confusing. Sep 15, 2018
- Sep 14, 2018 Ocelots have a lot of sex. My daughter told me. Sep 14, 2018
- Sep 13, 2018 Empathy vs. I believe in you Sep 13, 2018
- Sep 12, 2018 Yellow Stripey Things Sep 12, 2018
- Sep 11, 2018 A job is a job. Only a douchebag would think otherwise. Sep 11, 2018
- Sep 10, 2018 I can smell mustard when other people cannot, and it's probably saved my life. Sep 10, 2018
- Sep 9, 2018 Busy Town update gets my enthusiastic seal of approval Sep 9, 2018
- Sep 8, 2018 We don't need another ice cream flavor. Especially mayonnaise-flavored ice cream. Sep 8, 2018
- Sep 7, 2018 The people in Louisiana don't suck Sep 7, 2018
- Sep 6, 2018 Wife: Emoji Master Sep 6, 2018
- Sep 5, 2018 Seinfeld gets it Sep 5, 2018
- Sep 4, 2018 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2018 Sep 4, 2018
- Sep 3, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #16: Monica Cleveland Sep 3, 2018
- Sep 2, 2018 Weezer's "Africa" is Toto's "Africa." I don't get it. Sep 2, 2018
- Sep 1, 2018 Resolution update: August 2018 Sep 1, 2018
August 2018
- Aug 31, 2018 The best and the worst come together in Times Square Aug 31, 2018
- Aug 30, 2018 Storyworthy: The audiobook has arrived, narrated, perhaps unfortunately, by me Aug 30, 2018
- Aug 29, 2018 Donald Trump lost last night, and I won. Aug 29, 2018
- Aug 28, 2018 The worst Aug 28, 2018
- Aug 27, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #15: Roquita Johnson Aug 27, 2018
- Aug 26, 2018 Would you be more likely, less likely, or just as likely to marry your spouse today? Aug 26, 2018
- Aug 25, 2018 N-word bingo Aug 25, 2018
- Aug 24, 2018 If you could recover a single object from your past, what would it be? Aug 24, 2018
- Aug 23, 2018 Little things made big Aug 23, 2018
- Aug 22, 2018 The exact opposite of a bridezilla Aug 22, 2018
- Aug 21, 2018 Making the ordinary a little more extraordinary should always be celebrated Aug 21, 2018
- Aug 21, 2018 $126 is not a lot of money Aug 21, 2018
- Aug 20, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #14: Renae Edge Aug 20, 2018
- Aug 20, 2018 An anonymous note about a possible murder Aug 20, 2018
- Aug 19, 2018 Every time someone meets Elysha and says, "She's beautiful," this is what I think... Aug 19, 2018
- Aug 18, 2018 Hiring a coach so your child can play Fortnite better is ridiculous. Aug 18, 2018
- Aug 17, 2018 I better, safer alternative to lottery tickets Aug 17, 2018
- Aug 16, 2018 It appears that I might be less fallible than the Pope Aug 16, 2018
- Aug 15, 2018 Insecure cowards are leading the most powerful nations on the planet. Aug 15, 2018
- Aug 14, 2018 What the Heck? - Episode 2 Aug 14, 2018
- Aug 13, 2018 I didn't know what Lands' End was, and it makes sense. Aug 13, 2018
- Aug 13, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #13: Leland Brandt Aug 13, 2018
- Aug 12, 2018 I got mentioned in the New York Times yesterday for a teeny tiny thing that I feel so good about. Aug 12, 2018
- Aug 11, 2018 Seeking submissions for my annual list of shortcomings and flaws Aug 11, 2018
- Aug 11, 2018 Open mouth. Insert foot. Aug 11, 2018
- Aug 10, 2018 Clara's first Patriots game. NOT WHAT I EXPECTED AT ALL. Aug 10, 2018
- Aug 9, 2018 We were all changed forever. Aug 9, 2018
- Aug 8, 2018 I'm not a skateboard guy, but I think this is remarkable. Aug 8, 2018
- Aug 7, 2018 "Tears in the Rain" monologue captures it all Aug 7, 2018
- Aug 6, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #12: Jeni Bonaldo Aug 6, 2018
- Aug 6, 2018 Taco Bell vs. Ben & Jerries vanilla ice cream: It's not even close Aug 6, 2018
- Aug 5, 2018 This is not my doing Aug 5, 2018
- Aug 4, 2018 Help! Some kind of voodoo priest is trying to change my life! Aug 4, 2018
- Aug 3, 2018 My daughter has a full time job (in her estimation, at least) Aug 3, 2018
- Aug 2, 2018 There is nothing wrong with Bigfoot erotica Aug 2, 2018
- Aug 1, 2018 Resolution update: July 2018 Aug 1, 2018
July 2018
- Jul 31, 2018 Trump vs. Me Jul 31, 2018
- Jul 30, 2018 A small but glorious victory thanks to Charlie and Elysha Jul 30, 2018
- Jul 30, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #11: Jessica Isom Jul 30, 2018
- Jul 29, 2018 Windows down. Music up. Jul 29, 2018
- Jul 29, 2018 "What the Heck?" - Episode 1 (Seeds and boys in dresses) Jul 29, 2018
- Jul 28, 2018 Devil lady Jul 28, 2018
- Jul 27, 2018 Crazy man in the airport Jul 27, 2018
- Jul 26, 2018 Lemonade advertising was never so legal (or clever) before Jul 26, 2018
- Jul 25, 2018 Never Have I Ever: 12 things is now 14 things, partially because I'm a jerk Jul 25, 2018
- Jul 24, 2018 Get a cat Jul 24, 2018
- Jul 23, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #10: Kristin Budde Jul 23, 2018
- Jul 23, 2018 Why a poached egg is funny Jul 23, 2018
- Jul 22, 2018 It's weird that religious folk are so often filled with hate. Jul 22, 2018
- Jul 21, 2018 Swimming in a chlorinated pool is just like taking a bath Jul 21, 2018
- Jul 20, 2018 Goggles Jul 20, 2018
- Jul 19, 2018 Baby jumping is a real thing, and it's really, really stupid. Jul 19, 2018
- Jul 18, 2018 Mattress PSA Jul 18, 2018
- Jul 17, 2018 People. Not places or things. Jul 17, 2018
- Jul 16, 2018 Listen to smart people plus me Jul 16, 2018
- Jul 16, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #9: Alan Mackenzie Jul 16, 2018
- Jul 15, 2018 Twelve years! Jul 15, 2018
- Jul 14, 2018 Fly, Baby Trump! Fly! Jul 14, 2018
- Jul 13, 2018 Biggest fan and greatest nemesis meet. Results are climactic. Jul 13, 2018
- Jul 12, 2018 "Do we believe in heaven?" Jul 12, 2018
- Jul 11, 2018 Prankster satisfaction Jul 11, 2018
- Jul 10, 2018 It's too early for something as depressing as this. Jul 10, 2018
- Jul 9, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #8: Sharon Snow Jul 9, 2018
- Jul 9, 2018 "How do you get so much done?" Jul 9, 2018
- Jul 8, 2018 Daddy taught her well Jul 8, 2018
- Jul 7, 2018 I don't know my father had a second or third heart attack, so leave me alone. Jul 7, 2018
- Jul 6, 2018 Less money. More connection. Jul 6, 2018
- Jul 5, 2018 Low life cretins steal stories. Jul 5, 2018
- Jul 4, 2018 Name your sources or begone! Jul 4, 2018
- Jul 3, 2018 There is no reason to delay the use of signage like this. Jul 3, 2018
- Jul 2, 2018 The boy has been trained well. Jul 2, 2018
- Jul 2, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #7: Special Storyworthy book launch episode Jul 2, 2018
- Jul 1, 2018 Resolution update: June 2018 Jul 1, 2018
June 2018
- Jun 30, 2018 We march again. Jun 30, 2018
- Jun 29, 2018 Never trust alliteration Jun 29, 2018
- Jun 28, 2018 I am nonplussed about the shifting definition of nonplussed. Jun 28, 2018
- Jun 27, 2018 Jesus was a brown, undocumented immigrant who crossed national borders illegally ill Jun 27, 2018
- Jun 26, 2018 I hit a new thing. The results were tragic. Jun 26, 2018
- Jun 25, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #6: Special Storyworthy book launch episode Jun 25, 2018
- Jun 24, 2018 Empty that bag Jun 24, 2018
- Jun 23, 2018 An unexpected perk Jun 23, 2018
- Jun 22, 2018 I made the mature decision. Jun 22, 2018
- Jun 21, 2018 Watch people dance and be happy. Jun 21, 2018
- Jun 20, 2018 The answer to "How dare you?" Jun 20, 2018
- Jun 19, 2018 13 things that make me happy (5 years later) Jun 19, 2018
- Jun 19, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #5: Renata Sancken Jun 19, 2018
- Jun 18, 2018 A celebration of so much more than just a book Jun 18, 2018
- Jun 17, 2018 What would Jesus do? Jun 17, 2018
- Jun 16, 2018 Dunk your teacher Jun 16, 2018
- Jun 15, 2018 "Lockdown Lockdown" should not need to be a song. Jun 15, 2018
- Jun 14, 2018 Change. Now. Jun 14, 2018
- Jun 13, 2018 Bottom of the cup Jun 13, 2018
- Jun 12, 2018 The most unlikely of pars Jun 12, 2018
- Jun 11, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #4 Jun 11, 2018
- Jun 11, 2018 My latest piece in Parents magazine Jun 11, 2018
- Jun 10, 2018 Kids are the worst. Jun 10, 2018
- Jun 9, 2018 Walk fast. Now science is standing behind me. Jun 9, 2018
- Jun 8, 2018 The importance of an editor Jun 8, 2018
- Jun 7, 2018 Don't be embarrassed Jun 7, 2018
- Jun 6, 2018 The problem with crossword puzzles Jun 6, 2018
- Jun 5, 2018 Phone on your face Jun 5, 2018
- Jun 4, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #3: Mansoor Basha Jun 4, 2018
- Jun 3, 2018 Jurassic Park on the left. The Goonies on the right. Jun 3, 2018
- Jun 2, 2018 People don't like you because you complain all the time. Jun 2, 2018
- Jun 1, 2018 Resolution update: May 2018 Jun 1, 2018
May 2018
- May 31, 2018 Have some shame. Move out. May 31, 2018
- May 30, 2018 Charles Wallace Dicks: Age 6 May 30, 2018
- May 29, 2018 Quotation marks create a bizarre mystery May 29, 2018
- May 28, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling #2: Michelle Sebastianelli May 28, 2018
- May 27, 2018 Be a satisficer. May 27, 2018
- May 26, 2018 Keyboard May 26, 2018
- May 25, 2018 It's not all about the sleep May 25, 2018
- May 24, 2018 Morning conversation scares me. May 24, 2018
- May 23, 2018 Which hot dog is best? May 23, 2018
- May 22, 2018 Want me to find faith in God? Try a sex joke. May 22, 2018
- May 21, 2018 Speak Up Storytelling: The Podcast available today! May 21, 2018
- May 20, 2018 The threat of murder at midnight May 20, 2018
- May 19, 2018 Storyworthy in my hands! May 19, 2018
- May 18, 2018 A surprise breakfast with their friend. Not a potential heart attack for their father. May 18, 2018
- May 17, 2018 I made two instantaneous, temporary friends yesterday, and it meant everything to me. May 17, 2018
- May 16, 2018 Not a heart attack after all, but an eventful day nonetheless. May 16, 2018
- May 15, 2018 Ruth and Bush May 15, 2018
- May 14, 2018 So many white people... May 14, 2018
- May 13, 2018 I'm not supposed to be happy today. May 13, 2018
- May 12, 2018 Elysha the Unstoppable May 12, 2018
- May 11, 2018 Mohawks and Jessie Eisenberg May 11, 2018
- May 10, 2018 Constantly frowning and avoiding dogs at every turn May 10, 2018
- May 9, 2018 I am competitive, which means I might be a jerk but also other important things May 9, 2018
- May 8, 2018 A former student's advice on avoiding procrastination May 8, 2018
- May 7, 2018 A dose of 1850's racial politics to start my day May 7, 2018
- May 6, 2018 The old fashioned way of breaking up is the right way to break up May 6, 2018
- May 5, 2018 I did a backbend. Now I can do anything. May 5, 2018
- May 4, 2018 Pain and fear and joy all wrapped up in a stone May 4, 2018
- May 3, 2018 I don't see it. May 3, 2018
- May 2, 2018 Don't be selfish. Tell a story. May 2, 2018
- May 1, 2018 Resolution update: April 2018 May 1, 2018
April 2018
- Apr 30, 2018 These people exist, and I can't stand them. Apr 30, 2018
- Apr 29, 2018 She's studying volume. Apr 29, 2018
- Apr 28, 2018 Writing is already hard enough without this. Apr 28, 2018
- Apr 27, 2018 I was probably typecast. Apr 27, 2018
- Apr 26, 2018 Philosophy explained. For real. Apr 26, 2018
- Apr 25, 2018 Run to The Moth. Allow stories to lighten your load. Apr 25, 2018
- Apr 24, 2018 Stop with the woke. You'll look just as clueless and horrible as everyone else someday. Apr 24, 2018
- Apr 23, 2018 Live forever? Apr 23, 2018
- Apr 22, 2018 Setting goals is almost always important, except in this case Apr 22, 2018
- Apr 21, 2018 Billy Bishop Toronto City Airport is as quirky as it sounds Apr 21, 2018
- Apr 20, 2018 6 regrets Apr 20, 2018
- Apr 19, 2018 Eric Carmen's "Make Me Lose Control" is weird on many, many levels, including being inexplicably stuck in my head. Apr 19, 2018
- Apr 18, 2018 Eleven is evil. Apr 18, 2018
- Apr 17, 2018 A moment of honest-to-goodness terror Apr 17, 2018
- Apr 16, 2018 Worst decisions ever #1: My SportsCenter hat Apr 16, 2018
- Apr 15, 2018 My daughter meets Chelsea Clinton. Apr 15, 2018
- Apr 14, 2018 Why I'm obsessed with that traffic video Apr 14, 2018
- Apr 13, 2018 BOOK LAUNCH PARTY! SAVE THE DATE! Apr 13, 2018
- Apr 13, 2018 Kids say funny (and not so funny) things Apr 13, 2018
- Apr 12, 2018 Try something new. Again and again and again. Apr 12, 2018
- Apr 11, 2018 Evangelicals hate. Jesus would love. Apr 11, 2018
- Apr 11, 2018 Going nowhere Apr 11, 2018
- Apr 9, 2018 Good news/bad news on the exoneration front Apr 9, 2018
- Apr 8, 2018 Snoopy's advice sucks Apr 8, 2018
- Apr 7, 2018 Just a T Apr 7, 2018
- Apr 6, 2018 Yes, they are real eggs Apr 6, 2018
- Apr 5, 2018 The best compliment wasn't about my hair Apr 5, 2018
- Apr 4, 2018 Time spent in the Starbucks drive thru line is not time well spent Apr 4, 2018
- Apr 3, 2018 Republican interns are white. Apr 3, 2018
- Apr 2, 2018 Best and worst April Fools Day ever Apr 2, 2018
- Apr 1, 2018 Resolution update: March 2018 Apr 1, 2018
March 2018
- Mar 31, 2018 Traffic might make me a little crazy Mar 31, 2018
- Mar 30, 2018 It's always strange when state-run TV and the President aren't totally in sync Mar 30, 2018
- Mar 29, 2018 International Night: A reminder of what our country can and should be Mar 29, 2018
- Mar 28, 2018 Three continents in a single day Mar 28, 2018
- Mar 27, 2018 Memorizing phone numbers: An artifact of bygone days Mar 27, 2018
- Mar 26, 2018 New Evangelical definition of marriage Mar 26, 2018
- Mar 25, 2018 March For Our Lives 2018 Mar 25, 2018
- Mar 24, 2018 Book clubs on boats. Book clubs in cars. Book clubs complete with game shows and nudity. Mar 24, 2018
- Mar 23, 2018 A call to action! Please? Pretty please? Mar 23, 2018
- Mar 23, 2018 Brand new weapon of mass destruction Mar 23, 2018
- Mar 21, 2018 My first day without my friend Mar 21, 2018
- Mar 20, 2018 Kaleigh 2002-2018 Mar 20, 2018
- Mar 19, 2018 23 years lost and nothing offered in return Mar 19, 2018
- Mar 18, 2018 Movies require logic in order to succeed. Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri lacked that logic. Mar 18, 2018
- Mar 17, 2018 Joy in the small and the large Mar 17, 2018
- Mar 16, 2018 WeCroak: An app that does what my brain already does Mar 16, 2018
- Mar 15, 2018 CO2 is apparently like candy Mar 15, 2018
- Mar 14, 2018 People stay home when it rains. How stupid. Mar 14, 2018
- Mar 13, 2018 Snow days: One thing I love. One thing I hate. Mar 13, 2018
- Mar 12, 2018 An unusual and exhausting but unforgettable weekend thanks to a July night in 2011 Mar 12, 2018
- Mar 11, 2018 The gift of a memory is one of the best gifts of all Mar 11, 2018
- Mar 10, 2018 The Georgia Senate is controlled by bigots in the pocket of the NRA Mar 10, 2018
- Mar 9, 2018 From genius to Bart Simpson Mar 9, 2018
- Mar 8, 2018 Boy vs. Girl: Our 100th episode Mar 8, 2018
- Mar 7, 2018 This is the way to live Mar 7, 2018
- Mar 6, 2018 A sign, a grade book, and a bathtub are just a few of my memories of Hyde School Mar 6, 2018
- Mar 5, 2018 4 good ideas and 4 bad ideas about book clubs Mar 5, 2018
- Mar 4, 2018 Being a jerk and needing food stamps are mutually exclusive conditions Mar 4, 2018
- Mar 3, 2018 I performed in the dark. Without amplification. The results were surprising. Mar 3, 2018
- Mar 2, 2018 One of the best podcast episodes of all time Mar 2, 2018
- Mar 1, 2018 Resolution update: February 2018 Mar 1, 2018
February 2018
- Feb 28, 2018 I killed a whale. Also, I played golf in the snow. Feb 28, 2018
- Feb 27, 2018 Anatomy of a friendship: Shep Feb 27, 2018
- Feb 26, 2018 A bit of unsolicited, surely unwanted advice for my millennial friends Feb 26, 2018
- Feb 25, 2018 Robbery fail leads to great cheer and a smidgen of empathy Feb 25, 2018
- Feb 24, 2018 "Once or twice" is the sign of a lie Feb 24, 2018
- Feb 23, 2018 My daughter's art features an unusual and unexpected element Feb 23, 2018
- Feb 22, 2018 The President of the United States relied on scripted empathy Feb 22, 2018
- Feb 21, 2018 Americans want greater gun control. Lawmakers do not. Feb 21, 2018
- Feb 20, 2018 They couldn't play tic-tac-toe because of bandwidth. Feb 20, 2018
- Feb 19, 2018 Meet Antony Borges: American hero and a boy who has done more to curb gun violence in America than all of Congress. Feb 19, 2018
- Feb 18, 2018 Brothers in name only Feb 18, 2018
- Feb 18, 2018 Trump's attempts to gaslight Americans again. And again. And again. Feb 18, 2018
- Feb 17, 2018 My son loves his mother and sister AND NO ONE ELSE. Feb 17, 2018
- Feb 16, 2018 The best birthday gift for a teacher might surprise you Feb 16, 2018
- Feb 15, 2018 It's time to end the hopes and prayers. Feb 15, 2018
- Feb 14, 2018 One of life's most important skills Feb 14, 2018
- Feb 14, 2018 Things I Do #10: I don't look at airline pilots Feb 14, 2018
- Feb 13, 2018 A reasonable response to anti-vaxxers Feb 13, 2018
- Feb 12, 2018 Chuck Todd's litany of vile and shameful events is worth watching Feb 12, 2018
- Feb 11, 2018 Moth StorySLAM: Clara Wants a Sister Feb 11, 2018
- Feb 10, 2018 My wife and kids slow me down. Gloriously so. Feb 10, 2018
- Feb 7, 2018 Trump can't be banned from Twitter, but then he shouldn't be able to block me, either. Feb 7, 2018
- Feb 6, 2018 It hurts to ask sometimes. Feb 6, 2018
- Feb 5, 2018 There was a time in this country when Dads knew more than kids Feb 5, 2018
- Feb 4, 2018 $1.50 and a deleted tweet says everything you need to know. Feb 4, 2018
- Feb 3, 2018 The offer of a golden toilet seems just right Feb 3, 2018
- Feb 2, 2018 Four books in two months has been challenging, and this isn't helping. Feb 2, 2018
- Feb 1, 2018 Resolution update: January 2018 Feb 1, 2018
January 2018
- Jan 31, 2018 This video has aged badly. Very, very badly. Jan 31, 2018
- Jan 30, 2018 You're a writer? A real writer? Jan 30, 2018
- Jan 29, 2018 Save money. Pee on this page. Jan 29, 2018
- Jan 28, 2018 I love this and hate this. Jan 28, 2018
- Jan 27, 2018 Our boy watches Star Wars for the first time Jan 27, 2018
- Jan 26, 2018 The hardest and best apology Jan 26, 2018
- Jan 25, 2018 Stop getting older, little girl. Jan 25, 2018
- Jan 24, 2018 It's 9:00 on a Saturday... Jan 24, 2018
- Jan 23, 2018 Five sausages and a good story Jan 23, 2018
- Jan 22, 2018 It's a wonder I get anything done Jan 22, 2018
- Jan 21, 2018 Women's March 2018 Jan 21, 2018
- Jan 20, 2018 Are my books a window into my soul? Jan 20, 2018
- Jan 19, 2018 When I launched my DJ career, it was ancient times Jan 19, 2018
- Jan 18, 2018 I learned about "onset" this week Jan 18, 2018
- Jan 17, 2018 Pickle smooch? Jan 17, 2018
- Jan 16, 2018 48,762 is a completely unacceptable number Jan 16, 2018
- Jan 15, 2018 My kind of protest Jan 15, 2018
- Jan 14, 2018 Don't be a jerk face, parents and teachers. Jan 14, 2018
- Jan 13, 2018 One tweet. Four deliberate, purposeful lies. Jan 13, 2018
- Jan 12, 2018 These are the kinds of words that Americans yearn to hear Jan 12, 2018
- Jan 11, 2018 Two impressive people Jan 11, 2018
- Jan 10, 2018 This punishment may have gone too far. Jan 10, 2018
- Jan 9, 2018 "I'll do the salmon" is stupid. I might be, too. Jan 9, 2018
- Jan 8, 2018 A bunch of old, white men are determining the course of our nation Jan 8, 2018
- Jan 7, 2018 What will be written on your tombstone? Jan 7, 2018
- Jan 6, 2018 This Trump tweet is 50 words long but says so much more. Jan 6, 2018
- Jan 5, 2018 One of these things is not like the other Jan 5, 2018
- Jan 4, 2018 Bruce and Clarence sharing a kiss, over and over and over again Jan 4, 2018
- Jan 3, 2018 Hire that kid today! Jan 3, 2018
- Jan 2, 2018 New Year's resolutions: 2018 Jan 2, 2018
- Jan 1, 2018 Resolution update: 2017 in review Jan 1, 2018
December 2017
- Dec 31, 2017 New Year's Eve 1993 Dec 31, 2017
- Dec 30, 2017 The last one had better be the best one. Dec 30, 2017
- Dec 29, 2017 Writing a novel is hard enough already. I don't need these additional challenges. Dec 29, 2017
- Dec 28, 2017 HBO had some interesting offerings on Christmas Eve Dec 28, 2017
- Dec 27, 2017 My 2017 Christmas haul Dec 27, 2017
- Dec 26, 2017 Any gift that includes murder, blood, and betrayal is perfect in my book Dec 26, 2017
- Dec 25, 2017 Lest us not forget the real story of Christmas Dec 25, 2017
- Dec 24, 2017 I was a coward. I'm filled with regret. Dec 24, 2017
- Dec 23, 2017 Penguins were mating at a little girl's birthday party Dec 23, 2017
- Dec 22, 2017 Trump isn't fit to clean toilets Dec 22, 2017
- Dec 21, 2017 Awful human being alert Dec 21, 2017
- Dec 20, 2017 All I want for Christmas is a machine gun Dec 20, 2017
- Dec 19, 2017 When cowards hide behind digital walls and hurl grenades... Dec 19, 2017
- Dec 18, 2017 Some mistakes are worse than others Dec 18, 2017
- Dec 17, 2017 I talked to a stranger every day for a month. Here is what happened. Dec 17, 2017
- Dec 16, 2017 How I delivered an inspirational talk at a human trafficking conference (while knowing nothing about human trafficking) Dec 16, 2017
- Dec 15, 2017 My students are threatening the sanctity of our future Dec 15, 2017
- Dec 14, 2017 A sign. A tee-shirt. A business opportunity. A business partner. Dec 14, 2017
- Dec 13, 2017 Comeuppance! Dec 13, 2017
- Dec 12, 2017 I missed so much of '90's culture. Unfortunately? Dec 12, 2017
- Dec 11, 2017 Please don't let the Trump administration change your perception of history Dec 11, 2017
- Dec 10, 2017 If you enjoy a glass floor, don't forget to look down and thank your lucky stars Dec 10, 2017
- Dec 9, 2017 Things I do #12: I worry about people mentioned in songs who are frozen in time. Dec 9, 2017
- Dec 8, 2017 Things that make me cry Dec 8, 2017
- Dec 7, 2017 Setting goals for 2018 Dec 7, 2017
- Dec 6, 2017 You can't be "useless after 8:00 PM" if you want to be productive Dec 6, 2017
- Dec 5, 2017 Americans would never allow someone like Roy Moore to work alongside them. Except for Republican Senators, of course. Dec 5, 2017
- Dec 4, 2017 Fun fact: My wife and I both attended all-women’s colleges Dec 4, 2017
- Dec 2, 2017 Unfair assumption #31: Book banners are stupid people Dec 2, 2017
November 2017
- Nov 30, 2017 The Ugly Duckling sucks Nov 30, 2017
- Nov 29, 2017 Dan Kennedy is right. Reach out to people whose work means the world to you. Nov 29, 2017
- Nov 28, 2017 How can you possibly have so many stories? Nov 28, 2017
- Nov 27, 2017 Things I do #11: I get angry at the other versions of me. Nov 27, 2017
- Nov 26, 2017 5 things that you can do to help me sell books (and one unusual thing that I do) Nov 26, 2017
- Nov 25, 2017 Cats and writers don't mix Nov 25, 2017
- Nov 24, 2017 The wealthy are often playing an entirely different game than the rest of us. Nov 24, 2017
- Nov 23, 2017 On this Thanksgiving, I choose to be thankful to Taryn. Nov 23, 2017
- Nov 22, 2017 I performed stand up comedy for the first time for one very important reason. Nov 22, 2017
- Nov 20, 2017 Crazy just got crazier (if that was possible) Nov 20, 2017
- Nov 19, 2017 Be kind to yourself. Celebrate your accomplishments. Have wild sex. Nov 19, 2017
- Nov 17, 2017 The Republican tax bill is legitimately but expectedly evil. These two tidbits are surprisingly evil. Nov 17, 2017
- Nov 16, 2017 Take a cold shower every day. Nov 16, 2017
- Nov 15, 2017 Recline at your own risk Nov 15, 2017
- Nov 14, 2017 When you think the awful cover is the original song Nov 14, 2017
- Nov 13, 2017 Just last week, ALL THIS happened... Nov 13, 2017
- Nov 12, 2017 I prayed for a full month. Here is what happened. Nov 12, 2017
- Nov 11, 2017 An only slightly satirical nod to 1980's sitcoms Nov 11, 2017
- Nov 10, 2017 Things I Do #10: I don't look at airline pilots Nov 10, 2017
- Nov 9, 2017 I've been told that I'm going to hell. I'm not sure I agree. Nov 9, 2017
- Nov 8, 2017 Vin Scully's boycott of the NFL is stupid Nov 8, 2017
- Nov 6, 2017 Daylight Saving should be celebrated (or eliminated) Nov 6, 2017
- Nov 5, 2017 Damn fine answer, Yasmin. Nov 5, 2017
- Nov 4, 2017 Bill Murray was wrong. Groundhog Day is AMAZING. Nov 4, 2017
- Nov 2, 2017 Peruvian beauty pageant contestants steal a moment Nov 2, 2017
- Nov 1, 2017 Resolution Update: October 2017 Nov 1, 2017
October 2017
- Oct 31, 2017 Is God now here, or is God nowhere? Oct 31, 2017
- Oct 30, 2017 The 14 women who have accused Trump of sexual harassment or assault Oct 30, 2017
- Oct 29, 2017 Two things that will produce amazing results. Oct 29, 2017
- Oct 28, 2017 A high opinion of your own opinion is a very good thing Oct 28, 2017
- Oct 27, 2017 My kids were sweet and lovely this week. Don't try to tell me otherwise. Oct 27, 2017
- Oct 26, 2017 As long as you're not as sexually repressed as the Vice President, the gender-neutral restroom is working just fine Oct 26, 2017
- Oct 25, 2017 Lyric Problems: Belinda Carlisle's "Heaven is a Place on Earth" Oct 25, 2017
- Oct 24, 2017 Guest post: Daniel Dale's Twitter feed Oct 24, 2017
- Oct 23, 2017 I want a little signage, damn it. Oct 23, 2017
- Oct 22, 2017 Just the kind of conversation I want before sunrise Oct 22, 2017
- Oct 21, 2017 The men's restroom: All I want is a little consistency, please... Oct 21, 2017
- Oct 20, 2017 Earning his keep Oct 20, 2017
- Oct 19, 2017 When will she die? Oct 19, 2017
- Oct 18, 2017 Two word horror story Oct 18, 2017
- Oct 17, 2017 Free Dive Oct 17, 2017
- Oct 16, 2017 Julian Edleman changes everything! Oct 16, 2017
- Oct 15, 2017 Sibling love is a strange and varied thing Oct 15, 2017
- Oct 14, 2017 Complacency kills. Oct 14, 2017
- Oct 13, 2017 Lyric Problems: Carly Rae Jepsen's "Call Me Maybe" Oct 13, 2017
- Oct 12, 2017 "Don't you dare..." are words most frequently uttered by morons Oct 12, 2017
- Oct 11, 2017 This is not the Jesus you learned about in Sunday School Oct 11, 2017
- Oct 10, 2017 Why I say unpopular things Oct 10, 2017
- Oct 9, 2017 Feline barrier to creativity Oct 9, 2017
- Oct 8, 2017 Signs should not have attitudes. They should also be grammatically correct. Oct 8, 2017
- Oct 7, 2017 Trump's boycott list does not make America great at all Oct 7, 2017
- Oct 6, 2017 Things I Do #9: I avoid The Sound of Music Oct 6, 2017
- Oct 5, 2017 I hate problems. Not everyone feels the same. Oct 5, 2017
- Oct 4, 2017 One of our cats is much better than the other. Oct 4, 2017
- Oct 3, 2017 On a day of tragedy, a little hope. Oct 3, 2017
- Oct 2, 2017 Resolution update: September 2017 Oct 2, 2017
- Oct 1, 2017 Daddy is Mommy GPS Oct 1, 2017
September 2017
- Sep 30, 2017 Lyric Problems: Rachel Platten's "I'll Stand By You" Sep 30, 2017
- Sep 29, 2017 Someone wrote a song about me! About me! Sep 29, 2017
- Sep 28, 2017 A Trump supporter has found his bridge-too-far, and it's pathetic Sep 28, 2017
- Sep 27, 2017 Practice makes perfect Sep 27, 2017
- Sep 26, 2017 Would I ever take a knee in protest during the national anthem? Sep 26, 2017
- Sep 25, 2017 My favorite piece of paper Sep 25, 2017
- Sep 24, 2017 Republicans don't read The Bible Sep 24, 2017
- Sep 24, 2017 Never call it a "side hustle." Sep 24, 2017
- Sep 23, 2017 Lyric Problems: Van Halen's "Jump" Sep 23, 2017
- Sep 21, 2017 For the first time in his life, my son cried because of a book. Sep 21, 2017
- Sep 20, 2017 Quite possibly the worst person in the world Sep 20, 2017
- Sep 19, 2017 Share your failures with the world Sep 19, 2017
- Sep 18, 2017 Our dream-come-true comes to an end. A new chapter begins today. Sep 18, 2017
- Sep 17, 2017 A Columbian tradition that I will make my own Sep 17, 2017
- Sep 16, 2017 The fade out (and fade in) explained. Sep 16, 2017
- Sep 15, 2017 Mystery machine Sep 15, 2017
- Sep 14, 2017 Teaching is full of unexpected surprises Sep 14, 2017
- Sep 13, 2017 TEDx Pomfret: It's Not the Curriculum Sep 13, 2017
- Sep 12, 2017 A serious commitment to golf Sep 12, 2017
- Sep 11, 2017 An untimely poop and a blocked toilet lead to magic. Sep 11, 2017
- Sep 10, 2017 My favorite billboard Sep 10, 2017
- Sep 9, 2017 I am not talented. Sep 9, 2017
- Sep 8, 2017 When you tell your girlfriend via text that you wrote her a poem... Sep 8, 2017
- Sep 7, 2017 A sad, retired, perhaps unstable man Sep 7, 2017
- Sep 6, 2017 My son thinks I'm a golfing god Sep 6, 2017
- Sep 5, 2017 Time to break the law on behalf of Harriet Tubman Sep 5, 2017
- Sep 4, 2017 How do you juggle so many balls at once? The answer is simple. Sep 4, 2017
- Sep 3, 2017 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2017 Sep 3, 2017
- Sep 2, 2017 Trump's "real" job numbers Sep 2, 2017
- Sep 1, 2017 Resolution update: August 2017 Sep 1, 2017
August 2017
- Aug 31, 2017 Quite the catch Aug 31, 2017
- Aug 30, 2017 Stretch your summer Aug 30, 2017
- Aug 29, 2017 A little girl, a Supreme Court justice, and courage Aug 29, 2017
- Aug 28, 2017 A fitting end to a new beginning Aug 28, 2017
- Aug 27, 2017 Things I Do #8: I plant pennies heads-up Aug 27, 2017
- Aug 26, 2017 Northeast School is a stupid name for a school. Three times over. Aug 26, 2017
- Aug 25, 2017 '80's John Hughes villain comes alive Aug 25, 2017
- Aug 24, 2017 Forest Man is the best man Aug 24, 2017
- Aug 23, 2017 Boy and bear Aug 23, 2017
- Aug 23, 2017 This is what a free and excellent media looks like Aug 23, 2017
- Aug 22, 2017 The eclipse was underwhelming and a little boring. I wish it happened more often. Aug 22, 2017
- Aug 21, 2017 The ineffectiveness of signage Aug 21, 2017
- Aug 20, 2017 Don't forget. Aug 20, 2017
- Aug 19, 2017 A possible (though not advised) replacement for heart medication Aug 19, 2017
- Aug 18, 2017 Thoughts on hiring Aug 18, 2017
- Aug 17, 2017 Tyrion Lannister got it right. Aug 17, 2017
- Aug 16, 2017 This, too, shall pass. Aug 16, 2017
- Aug 15, 2017 I don't sleep like a robot. Or Frankenstein. Do I? Aug 15, 2017
- Aug 14, 2017 Religious folk shouldn't be filled with so much hate Aug 14, 2017
- Aug 13, 2017 Heather Heyer: Patriot and hero of the first order Aug 13, 2017
- Aug 12, 2017 A restroom sign need not indicate the activity that takes place therein. Aug 12, 2017
- Aug 11, 2017 Teachers: Writers never write one thing at a time. Stop ruining children. Aug 11, 2017
- Aug 10, 2017 A note on meetings Aug 10, 2017
- Aug 9, 2017 Genital usage restrictions must be adhered to at all times Aug 9, 2017
- Aug 8, 2017 So many jokes. Such little ears. Aug 8, 2017
- Aug 7, 2017 Disconnect the easy way. Aug 7, 2017
- Aug 6, 2017 Just listen to this. Please. Aug 6, 2017
- Aug 5, 2017 Not unisex. Omnisex. Aug 5, 2017
- Aug 4, 2017 Commitment, persistence, and practice can look a lot like talent. Don't be fooled. Aug 4, 2017
- Aug 3, 2017 Call it a lie when it's a lie. Aug 3, 2017
- Aug 2, 2017 I wrote on an island. Under a tree. In the middle of a parking lot. Aug 2, 2017
- Aug 1, 2017 Resolution Update: July 2017 Aug 1, 2017
July 2017
- Jul 31, 2017 There are six seasons. Not four. Jul 31, 2017
- Jul 30, 2017 So many white people Jul 30, 2017
- Jul 29, 2017 Sleeping babies: Less shame. More sleep. Jul 29, 2017
- Jul 28, 2017 Republican Congressmen threaten female Senators with violence. This is not normal. Jul 28, 2017
- Jul 27, 2017 I never saw The Ramones in concert. It kills me. Jul 27, 2017
- Jul 26, 2017 Check your privilege at the door Jul 26, 2017
- Jul 25, 2017 Trump stomped on tradition at the 2017 Boy Scout National Jamboree. Jul 25, 2017
- Jul 24, 2017 The Macarena is fine. It's these two songs that I despise. Jul 24, 2017
- Jul 23, 2017 Why I am still a wedding DJ after 20 years Jul 23, 2017
- Jul 22, 2017 The New York Times use of honorifics must end. Jul 22, 2017
- Jul 21, 2017 I was offered a full scholarship at Yale, and I passed. Jul 21, 2017
- Jul 20, 2017 A whole lot of beauty Jul 20, 2017
- Jul 19, 2017 I am successful because I am white. Jul 19, 2017
- Jul 18, 2017 Thinking is a part of the writing process, damn it Jul 18, 2017
- Jul 17, 2017 This is how every employee should be treated Jul 17, 2017
- Jul 16, 2017 Happy anniversary to us. Jul 16, 2017
- Jul 15, 2017 A boy and a book in Columbia Jul 15, 2017
- Jul 15, 2017 Trump makes my head hurt Jul 15, 2017
- Jul 14, 2017 Someone remind my children that I pay the mortgage Jul 14, 2017
- Jul 13, 2017 Republican men decide that women can't wear sleeveless dresses because they are apparently afraid of lady shoulders Jul 13, 2017
- Jul 12, 2017 Donald Trump has blocked me on Twitter Jul 12, 2017
- Jul 11, 2017 Fill your life with young people Jul 11, 2017
- Jul 10, 2017 What are you doing that scares you? Jul 10, 2017
- Jul 9, 2017 Sharing your vacation photos is lovely, but how about some wisdom and insight to go along with it? Jul 9, 2017
- Jul 8, 2017 "They call me Matt." Jul 8, 2017
- Jul 7, 2017 Rick Perry didn't understand the Department that he now runs, but he REALLY doesn't understand basic economic theory Jul 7, 2017
- Jul 6, 2017 You have to admire a church willing to take this kind of literary stand Jul 6, 2017
- Jul 5, 2017 I stand opposed to applauding when the people responsible for the source of the applause are not present. Jul 5, 2017
- Jul 4, 2017 The NRA: Important facts to remember before their crazy attack ads scare the hell out of you. Jul 4, 2017
- Jul 3, 2017 We knew exactly what we were getting. Jul 3, 2017
- Jul 2, 2017 Reputation matters even more when the world is small. Jul 2, 2017
- Jul 1, 2017 Resolution update June 2017 Jul 1, 2017
June 2017
- Jun 30, 2017 My summer vacation started with pain and fear. Then one man made it better. Jun 30, 2017
- Jun 29, 2017 Boys in skirts Jun 29, 2017
- Jun 28, 2017 I don't have T-rex arms, but if I did, it would be for a very good reason. Jun 28, 2017
- Jun 27, 2017 A summer camp has adopted my restriction on commenting on physical appearance, and I'm thrilled. Jun 27, 2017
- Jun 26, 2017 Greatest badass of all time Jun 26, 2017
- Jun 25, 2017 Dumb school officials make dumb decision Jun 25, 2017
- Jun 24, 2017 Last Man Standing Jun 24, 2017
- Jun 23, 2017 Hermit crabs could teach US politicians a thing or two Jun 23, 2017
- Jun 22, 2017 "All gender" restroom signs are the best Jun 22, 2017
- Jun 21, 2017 Democratic Republic of the Congo, of course! Jun 21, 2017
- Jun 20, 2017 Heroes have a way of making you realize how small-minded and ungrateful you have been. Jun 20, 2017
- Jun 19, 2017 Shameful Betsy DeVos can't say what most human beings can say with ease Jun 19, 2017
- Jun 18, 2017 Suck less Jun 18, 2017
- Jun 18, 2017 Not all sources of inspiration are equal Jun 18, 2017
- Jun 16, 2017 Sleeps like her daddy Jun 16, 2017
- Jun 15, 2017 If you are reading this, it is very likely that you don't deserve the fourth cookie Jun 15, 2017
- Jun 14, 2017 The things I get done while sleepwalking Jun 14, 2017
- Jun 13, 2017 Wherever you stand on the political spectrum, you have to admire and hopefully agree with everything that James Comey says here during last week's hearings. Jun 13, 2017
- Jun 12, 2017 Why indeed. Jun 12, 2017
- Jun 11, 2017 How to Save a Boy Jun 11, 2017
- Jun 10, 2017 My home state's stupidly misspelled word, and some confusion about misspelling related to pornography Jun 10, 2017
- Jun 9, 2017 I wish my students would accuse me of a war crime Jun 9, 2017
- Jun 8, 2017 17 rules I break Jun 8, 2017
- Jun 7, 2017 My children's personal ten commandments are beautiful, heart wrenching, and completely applicable. Jun 7, 2017
- Jun 6, 2017 Rachel Platten has it all wrong when it comes to truth and faith, and I have no idea why. Jun 6, 2017
- Jun 5, 2017 Change happens slowly, methodically, and daily. Most people refuse to accept this. Jun 5, 2017
- Jun 4, 2017 Increased degree of difficulty is not appreciated Jun 4, 2017
- Jun 3, 2017 Didn't exist in 2005 Jun 3, 2017
- Jun 2, 2017 RIP Uncle Harry Jun 2, 2017
- Jun 1, 2017 Resolution update: May 2017 Jun 1, 2017
May 2017
- May 31, 2017 My friends know me better than I do. Also, my ophthalmologist doesn't know me at all. May 31, 2017
- May 30, 2017 I don't like the way I look. May 30, 2017
- May 29, 2017 Fear not. This is not an example of bigotry as I initially thought. It's simply stupidity. May 29, 2017
- May 28, 2017 Our cats are not perfect. May 28, 2017
- May 27, 2017 You're standing on a cliff, too... May 27, 2017
- May 26, 2017 Ray of light May 26, 2017
- May 25, 2017 Even in the darkest of times, you can find pinpricks of light. Here are a few from this week. May 25, 2017
- May 24, 2017 "Begs the question" brings joy to my heart. Rarely. May 24, 2017
- May 23, 2017 Worst obituary ever. Greatest correction ever. May 23, 2017
- May 22, 2017 A simple explanation of public opinion May 22, 2017
- May 21, 2017 Seven and counting... May 21, 2017
- May 20, 2017 Be happy for rule breakers May 20, 2017
- May 19, 2017 Baseball players are damn cowards May 19, 2017
- May 18, 2017 The Moth: The Robbery May 18, 2017
- May 17, 2017 Let's do this. May 17, 2017
- May 16, 2017 I choose to remember by aunt Diane in a way I never got to see her. May 16, 2017
- May 15, 2017 The Two-Day Rule: A means by which I have become more productive and trusted. May 15, 2017
- May 14, 2017 Verbal sparring: Don't allow your opponent (Trump) prescribe beliefs to you May 14, 2017
- May 13, 2017 One man. Two dozen women. A bunch of interesting questions. May 13, 2017
- May 12, 2017 Shorter is almost always better May 12, 2017
- May 11, 2017 Best tweet ever May 11, 2017
- May 10, 2017 Incompetent, racist, or both? May 10, 2017
- May 9, 2017 I don't like teachers who act like jerks May 9, 2017
- May 8, 2017 I made an old lady cry. I asked if I was wrong. Readers responded. May 8, 2017
- May 7, 2017 Things I Do #7: I cut corners May 7, 2017
- May 6, 2017 My three greatest acts of storytelling cruelty May 6, 2017
- May 5, 2017 How to improve church attendance May 5, 2017
- May 4, 2017 I may learn to bake if it's always this cute May 4, 2017
- May 4, 2017 Financial PTSD: The perfect description of a persistent affliction May 4, 2017
- May 2, 2017 Fantastic or terrible? May 2, 2017
- May 1, 2017 Resolution update: April 2017 May 1, 2017
April 2017
- Apr 30, 2017 A strong opinion on the onion volcano Apr 30, 2017
- Apr 29, 2017 Desperately seeking trouble Apr 29, 2017
- Apr 28, 2017 Bad day Apr 28, 2017
- Apr 27, 2017 I made an old woman cry. Was I wrong? Apr 27, 2017
- Apr 25, 2017 Demanding "a seat at the table" doesn't strike me as very demanding Apr 25, 2017
- Apr 24, 2017 I don't teach mindfulness. Don't ever accuse me of teaching mindfulness. Here's why. Apr 24, 2017
- Apr 23, 2017 The law of choice in dating (and a call for the end of tribalism) Apr 23, 2017
- Apr 22, 2017 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend fan art Apr 22, 2017
- Apr 21, 2017 The essence of a New England Patriots fan and a Bostonian in 5 tweets. Apr 21, 2017
- Apr 20, 2017 School lunch shaming needs to stop. Simple solution: Adults need to stop acting despicable. Apr 20, 2017
- Apr 19, 2017 The next time you need to go into battle... Apr 19, 2017
- Apr 18, 2017 Warning: Women with handbags crossing Apr 18, 2017
- Apr 17, 2017 A tribute to Carrie Fisher Apr 17, 2017
- Apr 16, 2017 How Can You Help Students Cope With Getting College Rejection Letters? Apr 16, 2017
- Apr 15, 2017 New policy: Transform a meeting into an actual meeting. Apr 15, 2017
- Apr 14, 2017 Things I Do #6: I touch bricks Apr 14, 2017
- Apr 13, 2017 The one thing about Sean Spicer's recent bout of stupidity that I haven't heard mentioned Apr 13, 2017
- Apr 12, 2017 How to identify passive voice Apr 12, 2017
- Apr 11, 2017 United Airlines is its own worst enemy. They need help. I have offered. Apr 11, 2017
- Apr 10, 2017 People misspeak. When their words are bigoted or sexist, we automatically condemn. We should think twice. Apr 10, 2017
- Apr 9, 2017 Current career listing: Perhaps you require my services and just don't know it yet. Apr 9, 2017
- Apr 8, 2017 When I was my daughter's age, I did not know that the Supreme Court existed. Her knowledge is slightly more expansive. Apr 8, 2017
- Apr 7, 2017 Decoding century labels shouldn't be this difficult Apr 7, 2017
- Apr 6, 2017 Sleeping less is not the secret to my productivity. Television is. Apr 6, 2017
- Apr 5, 2017 19 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was 20 Apr 5, 2017
- Apr 4, 2017 Rogue One on VHS: A taste of the perfect childhood Apr 4, 2017
- Apr 3, 2017 If your schedule your meeting for one hour, and then your meeting lasts exactly one hour, you have failed. Apr 3, 2017
- Apr 2, 2017 Be happy. Judge on intent. Apr 2, 2017
- Apr 1, 2017 Resolution update: March 2017 Apr 1, 2017
March 2017
- Mar 31, 2017 Simplify your life. Just love everyone. Even if you're a bigot. Mar 31, 2017
- Mar 30, 2017 When is complaining acceptable? Mar 30, 2017
- Mar 29, 2017 My less-than-private, not-so-well-appointed office Mar 29, 2017
- Mar 28, 2017 Moments like this make me think that perhaps there's a higher power after all Mar 28, 2017
- Mar 27, 2017 We adopted two cats. Our kids' reaction was... unexpected. Mar 27, 2017
- Mar 26, 2017 Meals on Wheels: My grandparents (and science) understand the importance for this program Mar 26, 2017
- Mar 25, 2017 Beautiful but temporary: Why would an artist ever choose such a fleeting medium? Mar 25, 2017
- Mar 24, 2017 A bunch of white men apparently too stupid to realize that they are all white men. Mar 24, 2017
- Mar 23, 2017 Famous people who I've met thanks to storytelling Mar 23, 2017
- Mar 22, 2017 The things kids say... Mar 22, 2017
- Mar 21, 2017 Your compliments about physical appearance are meaningless. Try these instead. Mar 21, 2017
- Mar 20, 2017 The 6 levels of humility Mar 20, 2017
- Mar 19, 2017 What I try to teach my girls Mar 19, 2017
- Mar 18, 2017 Change can happen quickly. If you allow it. Mar 18, 2017
- Mar 17, 2017 I'm never this angry. I swear. Mar 17, 2017
- Mar 16, 2017 Details matter. They matter a hell of a lot. Mar 16, 2017
- Mar 15, 2017 Say no to "more details." Mar 15, 2017
- Mar 14, 2017 It is only snow and nothing more. Mar 14, 2017
- Mar 13, 2017 Stories are so damn important. Mar 13, 2017
- Mar 12, 2017 End the scourge of the additional anus Mar 12, 2017
- Mar 11, 2017 Rules of Self Praise by the Brilliant and Handsome Matthew Dicks Mar 11, 2017
- Mar 10, 2017 Only in New York Mar 10, 2017
- Mar 9, 2017 Michael Bloomberg on succeeding in business Mar 9, 2017
- Mar 8, 2017 I broke my promise to my wife: The origin story of The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs Mar 8, 2017
- Mar 7, 2017 In case you missed it, an important comment from a reader Mar 7, 2017
- Mar 6, 2017 I fear that this sentiment may be in short supply today. Mar 6, 2017
- Mar 5, 2017 Critics of food stamps need to experience a childhood of hunger Mar 5, 2017
- Mar 4, 2017 A sign attached to a vending machine accurately describes the emotional state of many Americans Mar 4, 2017
- Mar 3, 2017 Joy is the willingness to show your underwear on a roller coaster Mar 3, 2017
- Mar 2, 2017 I failed the "Where do babies come from?" question, but only because my son is a biology nerd. Mar 2, 2017
- Mar 1, 2017 Resolution update: February 2017 Mar 1, 2017
February 2017
- Feb 28, 2017 Unfair assumption #30: CVS shopping carts were not made to be filled. Feb 28, 2017
- Feb 27, 2017 Good ideas are a dime a dozen. Never settle. Feb 27, 2017
- Feb 26, 2017 The Education Secretary is knowingly endangering children Feb 26, 2017
- Feb 25, 2017 Tiny moments like this is why I teach Feb 25, 2017
- Feb 24, 2017 I was stupid when I was young. Feb 24, 2017
- Feb 23, 2017 The glory and might of a good old fashioned pillow fight Feb 23, 2017
- Feb 22, 2017 Men who grumble about jeans and sweaters are stupid. Feb 22, 2017
- Feb 21, 2017 The Internet has certainly evolved in the last 20 years Feb 21, 2017
- Feb 20, 2017 5 things to remember when bemoaning the proliferation of casual dress in America. Feb 20, 2017
- Feb 19, 2017 Trump called the media "the enemy of the American people." This could not be further from the truth. Feb 19, 2017
- Feb 18, 2017 Three types of people who people hate Feb 18, 2017
- Feb 17, 2017 Watch this. Feb 17, 2017
- Feb 16, 2017 My daughter embraces respectful dissent and nonconformity. Even in the face of Trump. Feb 16, 2017
- Feb 15, 2017 The real answer to "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Feb 15, 2017
- Feb 14, 2017 Before you criticize the Superintendent for a snow day decision, consider this. Feb 14, 2017
- Feb 13, 2017 Trumpian typos abound - and frighten me to death Feb 13, 2017
- Feb 12, 2017 Brother and Sister Day Feb 12, 2017
- Feb 11, 2017 Got kids? Here's how to turn them into writers. Feb 11, 2017
- Feb 10, 2017 Follow this rule. Change your life. Feb 10, 2017
- Feb 9, 2017 Victory brownies and the definition of fandom and friendship Feb 9, 2017
- Feb 8, 2017 15 piece of advice from Elizabeth Sampat Feb 8, 2017
- Feb 5, 2017 My daughter, the eccentric artist Feb 5, 2017
- Feb 4, 2017 I spent $15,000 while I was sleepwalking. Feb 4, 2017
- Feb 3, 2017 Verbal sparring: Never tell someone to do something that they can ignore Feb 3, 2017
- Feb 2, 2017 The Lincoln Memorial. In blocks. Feb 2, 2017
- Feb 1, 2017 Resolution update: January 2017 Feb 1, 2017
January 2017
- Jan 31, 2017 9 Specific Steps to Standing Against Donald Trump Jan 31, 2017
- Jan 30, 2017 A very sweet boy who wants to see your insides Jan 30, 2017
- Jan 29, 2017 The 5 Stages of an Author's Reaction to Editorial Notes Jan 29, 2017
- Jan 28, 2017 This hateful Muslim Ban must end now. Jan 28, 2017
- Jan 27, 2017 I lost a "friend" this week in an interesting, baffling, and amusing way Jan 27, 2017
- Jan 26, 2017 Something to think about as Trump closes our borders to refugees Jan 26, 2017
- Jan 25, 2017 I'm fairly certain I would hate this person if we met Jan 25, 2017
- Jan 24, 2017 One person is listening. Perhaps more, but at least one. I'm so pleased. Jan 24, 2017
- Jan 23, 2017 Things I Do #5: We say my name first Jan 23, 2017
- Jan 22, 2017 Psychology of true friends Jan 22, 2017
- Jan 21, 2017 The Today Show: Educational television at its best Jan 21, 2017
- Jan 20, 2017 Our President is a sex offender or pretends to be a sex offender. Jan 20, 2017
- Jan 19, 2017 A short-sighted and fairly presumptuous name Jan 19, 2017
- Jan 18, 2017 I might know more about education than Trump's nominee for Education Secretary. Jan 18, 2017
- Jan 17, 2017 Find something to be this excited and happy about... Jan 17, 2017
- Jan 16, 2017 Unfair assumption #29: Football fans are more effective in emergencies Jan 16, 2017
- Jan 15, 2017 Springsteen on parents (and perhaps a path to my salvation) Jan 15, 2017
- Jan 14, 2017 The best thing about my wife's family might surprise you (but shouldn't) Jan 14, 2017
- Jan 13, 2017 Little Guy Defeats Big Guy Jan 13, 2017
- Jan 12, 2017 Spare your parental advice unless you know how to give parental advice Jan 12, 2017
- Jan 11, 2017 On rare and special occasions, darkness can breed such light. This is one such occasion. Jan 11, 2017
- Jan 10, 2017 How many phone numbers do you know? Jan 10, 2017
- Jan 9, 2017 The countdown begins... Jan 9, 2017
- Jan 8, 2017 This correction could only be found in a New York Times wedding announcement Jan 8, 2017
- Jan 7, 2017 Best introduction ever Jan 7, 2017
- Jan 6, 2017 Some mistakes are larger than others Jan 6, 2017
- Jan 5, 2017 This is the worst thing you can do to a storyteller Jan 5, 2017
- Jan 4, 2017 Things I Do #4: I drive like a teenager Jan 4, 2017
- Jan 3, 2017 In defense of editors Jan 3, 2017
- Jan 2, 2017 A small bit of marital advice Jan 2, 2017
- Jan 1, 2017 Dick Clark is dead. He is sorely missed. Jan 1, 2017
- Jan 1, 2017 New Year's resolutions: 2017 Jan 1, 2017
December 2016
- Dec 31, 2016 Resolution update: 2016 in review Dec 31, 2016
- Dec 30, 2016 What is wrong with Queens? Dec 30, 2016
- Dec 30, 2016 My 2016 Christmas haul Dec 30, 2016
- Dec 29, 2016 Unfair assumption #28: Parents who threaten to disown their children based upon their marital choices are the lowest form of human life. Dec 29, 2016
- Dec 29, 2016 In regards to Russian hacking: "I think we ought to get on with our lives." Also, word salad. Dec 29, 2016
- Dec 28, 2016 Bottle flipping: I gave it a month. Here are my thoughts. Dec 28, 2016
- Dec 27, 2016 "Merry Christmas" is perfectly fine. But the existence of Jews should not be a secret. Dec 27, 2016
- Dec 26, 2016 The truth about red meat (and an ugly truth about me) Dec 26, 2016
- Dec 25, 2016 Bruce Springsteen understands the cliff. Do you? Dec 25, 2016
- Dec 24, 2016 When someone suggests that we give Donald Trump a chance, say this. Dec 24, 2016
- Dec 23, 2016 Why I cry when looking at old photographs like this. Dec 23, 2016
- Dec 22, 2016 If you forbid jeans at your place of business, you're not thinking straight. You might even be a coward. Dec 22, 2016
- Dec 21, 2016 I went to the bathroom alongside a bunch of ladies, and something surprising happened. Dec 21, 2016
- Dec 20, 2016 The perils of the road Dec 20, 2016
- Dec 19, 2016 My problem with honorifics Dec 19, 2016
- Dec 18, 2016 Driving in cars (and planes) with complete strangers Dec 18, 2016
- Dec 17, 2016 Gas stations suck (at least in this regard) Dec 17, 2016
- Dec 16, 2016 Truth about meetings (at least most of them) Dec 16, 2016
- Dec 15, 2016 The three worst things ever Dec 15, 2016
- Dec 14, 2016 My favorite sentence of the year Dec 14, 2016
- Dec 13, 2016 Cousin Oliver sucked. Dec 13, 2016
- Dec 12, 2016 This is a thing. Dec 12, 2016
- Dec 11, 2016 Meditation and McDonald's Dec 11, 2016
- Dec 10, 2016 One of the best comebacks I've heard in a while Dec 10, 2016
- Dec 9, 2016 Trump's two possible views of sexual assault Dec 9, 2016
- Dec 8, 2016 Dan Kennedy on life and the nature of success Dec 8, 2016
- Dec 7, 2016 I drink Diet Coke. Now do me a favor and shut up about it. Dec 7, 2016
- Dec 6, 2016 I fought off a pit bull in order to save my dog's life. This guy did one better. Dec 6, 2016
- Dec 5, 2016 Daily affirmations don't work (for me, at least) Dec 5, 2016
- Dec 4, 2016 Which is funnier? Saturday Night Live? Trump's response to SNL? Alec Baldwin's response to Trump? Dec 4, 2016
- Dec 3, 2016 How I stand against the vile, intolerant, hateful speech and policy proposals of the President-elect (and how you can, too) Dec 3, 2016
- Dec 2, 2016 A little spot of joy. Dec 2, 2016
- Dec 1, 2016 Resolution update: November 2016 Dec 1, 2016
November 2016
- Nov 30, 2016 How Can I Pick My Favorite Day? Nov 30, 2016
- Nov 29, 2016 This is what the Democratic Party must do now to protect voting rights Nov 29, 2016
- Nov 28, 2016 I thrive in possibly inappropriately competitive situations. Nov 28, 2016
- Nov 27, 2016 My little boy is expanding his horizons. Nov 27, 2016
- Nov 26, 2016 Melting ice sucks, but projectiles to the head are bad, too. Nov 26, 2016
- Nov 25, 2016 Serious solution if Trump attempts to enact a Muslim registry Nov 25, 2016
- Nov 24, 2016 No thanks to give on this Thanksgiving Nov 24, 2016
- Nov 23, 2016 Deep thoughts in the early morning hours regarding an important consumer product Nov 23, 2016
- Nov 22, 2016 Things I Do #3: I talk to dead trees. Nov 22, 2016
- Nov 21, 2016 Republican Senators, Congresspeople, and interns have something oddly in common Nov 21, 2016
- Nov 20, 2016 Humility is lovely and oftentimes lacking in this world Nov 20, 2016
- Nov 20, 2016 A perfect explanation of our President-elect's thin skin Nov 20, 2016
- Nov 19, 2016 Shakespeare's words seem rather appropriate even today Nov 19, 2016
- Nov 18, 2016 Pausing the action preserved my chest, my career, and my freedom Nov 18, 2016
- Nov 16, 2016 Books can change a child in unspeakable ways. Nov 16, 2016
- Nov 15, 2016 Iguana vs. Snakes Nov 15, 2016
- Nov 14, 2016 Seasons Up Close Episode 1 Nov 14, 2016
- Nov 13, 2016 Donna Gosk stepped off the aircraft carrier. Nothing has been the same ever since. Nov 13, 2016
- Nov 12, 2016 The Weird Book Room: The last place I want my books to end up Nov 12, 2016
- Nov 11, 2016 The mix tape was something special Nov 11, 2016
- Nov 10, 2016 Things I Do #2: I whisper the names of former colleagues Nov 10, 2016
- Nov 9, 2016 The morning after, there is much to do. Much to remember. Nov 9, 2016
- Nov 8, 2016 Tummy or vagina? Nov 8, 2016
- Nov 8, 2016 These are times when your country should come before your brand. Nov 8, 2016
- Nov 7, 2016 Things I Do #1: I routinely offer advice to houseflies Nov 7, 2016
- Nov 6, 2016 Saturday morning reading material Nov 6, 2016
- Nov 5, 2016 Unsatisfying Nov 5, 2016
- Nov 4, 2016 I feel terrible for the Chicago Cubs fans, and for good reason. Nov 4, 2016
- Nov 3, 2016 Pulling back the curtain on the translation process Nov 3, 2016
- Nov 2, 2016 Ashes to dishes Nov 2, 2016
- Nov 1, 2016 Resolution update: October 2016 Nov 1, 2016
October 2016
- Oct 31, 2016 Worst Halloween treat ever Oct 31, 2016
- Oct 30, 2016 Catholics should be able to scatter their ashes wherever they damn well please. Oct 30, 2016
- Oct 29, 2016 My new TV gig Oct 29, 2016
- Oct 28, 2016 Be happy for the good fortune of others. It's a happier and more productive way to live. Oct 28, 2016
- Oct 27, 2016 Collaboration is great. Right? Oct 27, 2016
- Oct 26, 2016 Put stuff on the Internet and watch what happens Oct 26, 2016
- Oct 25, 2016 Random chairs in restrooms make me uncomfortable. Justifiably so. Right? Oct 25, 2016
- Oct 24, 2016 Why should I experience unnecessary minor pain? Because I choose not to be soft. Oct 24, 2016
- Oct 23, 2016 Professional Mini Golf: Competitive, cutthroat, and quirky? Oct 23, 2016
- Oct 22, 2016 Wardrobe malfunction Oct 22, 2016
- Oct 21, 2016 Great first sentences (and an analysis of the first sentences of my own novels) Oct 21, 2016
- Oct 20, 2016 "Yeah, but..." Oct 20, 2016
- Oct 19, 2016 Quite possibly Bruce Springsteen's most brilliant and perfect observation ever Oct 19, 2016
- Oct 18, 2016 Unfair assumption #27: People who object to mothers breast-feeding in public are freakish, worthless prudes and more Oct 18, 2016
- Oct 17, 2016 This Playmobil bicycle helmet does not appeal to me, and for good reason. Oct 17, 2016
- Oct 16, 2016 How Poor Were You? Oct 16, 2016
- Oct 15, 2016 Unfair assumption #26: Adults who drink milk are lunatics Oct 15, 2016
- Oct 14, 2016 Sometimes a job is more than a job. Oct 14, 2016
- Oct 13, 2016 This is more important than selling shoes and books. Oct 13, 2016
- Oct 12, 2016 The Moth: The Promise Oct 12, 2016
- Oct 11, 2016 Best insult ever Oct 11, 2016
- Oct 10, 2016 Practicing your speech in front of a mirror makes no sense Oct 10, 2016
- Oct 9, 2016 Confessions of a Patriots Season Ticket Holder: Seasons Fall 2016 Oct 9, 2016
- Oct 8, 2016 Never in my life Oct 8, 2016
- Oct 7, 2016 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend fan art Oct 7, 2016
- Oct 6, 2016 Get off my lawn! Oct 6, 2016
- Oct 5, 2016 I run through grocery stores often enough that strangers have begun to notice. This does not make me crazy, even though some might believe otherwise. Oct 5, 2016
- Oct 4, 2016 You see a leaf. I see something so much worse. Oct 4, 2016
- Oct 3, 2016 Disillusioned by the Presidential election this year? Vote for Clara. Oct 3, 2016
- Oct 2, 2016 It's true. I hate strangers because of what they love most. Oct 2, 2016
- Oct 1, 2016 Resolution update: September 2016 Oct 1, 2016
September 2016
- Sep 30, 2016 Twenty-five years spent standing in a parking lot Sep 30, 2016
- Sep 29, 2016 Does the dog die? We need to know. Sep 29, 2016
- Sep 28, 2016 An important lesson for all public speakers, storytellers, and the poor souls who must conduct meetings Sep 28, 2016
- Sep 27, 2016 Four pieces of debate advice for Hillary Clinton. Someone please pass this post onto her people. Sep 27, 2016
- Sep 26, 2016 Verbal Sparring: If you don't like it, leave. Sep 26, 2016
- Sep 25, 2016 Unfair assumption: The more you have on your business card, the less I think about your professional ability Sep 25, 2016
- Sep 24, 2016 Complimenting an item of clothing is the lowest form of compliment Sep 24, 2016
- Sep 23, 2016 The first person to listen to my nonsense and predict that I would be a writer has passed away Sep 23, 2016
- Sep 22, 2016 Write the thing that only you can write Sep 22, 2016
- Sep 21, 2016 If you want to have a say in education, become an educator Sep 21, 2016
- Sep 20, 2016 Policing the national anthem makes you a self-righteous jerk Sep 20, 2016
- Sep 19, 2016 Styling advice from a fifth grader Sep 19, 2016
- Sep 18, 2016 Shouldn't yellow raincoats the only appropriately colored raincoats? Sep 18, 2016
- Sep 17, 2016 Water Street Bookstore appearance Sep 17, 2016
- Sep 16, 2016 A trip to the plumbing store, because that's where all kids want to go. Right? Sep 16, 2016
- Sep 15, 2016 Every time I tie my shoes... Sep 15, 2016
- Sep 14, 2016 The Most Poorly Named Character in All of Literature Sep 14, 2016
- Sep 13, 2016 Vincent Van Gogh on Doctor Who makes me cry. Sep 13, 2016
- Sep 12, 2016 At last I am a Beautiful Person. Verified and confirmed by beautifulpeople.com. Sep 12, 2016
- Sep 11, 2016 "Flesh" was a crayon color. Sep 11, 2016
- Sep 10, 2016 First day of preschool apparently went well Sep 10, 2016
- Sep 9, 2016 Unknown but brilliant Sep 9, 2016
- Sep 8, 2016 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2016 Sep 8, 2016
- Sep 8, 2016 I broke into the Brooklyn Navy Yard and committed a crime (I think) Sep 8, 2016
- Sep 7, 2016 The bravest Sep 7, 2016
- Sep 6, 2016 Book Club Adventures on Planes and Trains and Automobiles (sort of) Sep 6, 2016
- Sep 5, 2016 I think my wife is hitting on me. Sep 5, 2016
- Sep 4, 2016 I know way too much about boll weevils Sep 4, 2016
- Sep 3, 2016 Preschool is destined to disappoint my son. Sep 3, 2016
- Sep 2, 2016 "Baked in a buttery, flaky crust" Sep 2, 2016
- Sep 1, 2016 Resolution update: August 2016 Sep 1, 2016
August 2016
- Aug 31, 2016 A real life person signs my books as his fictional self, which sounds weird and is admittedly a little weird. Aug 31, 2016
- Aug 30, 2016 The most astounding editor's note I have ever seen Aug 30, 2016
- Aug 29, 2016 How Pokemon Go is a lot like Hee Haw, and how that should both relieve you and frighten you Aug 29, 2016
- Aug 28, 2016 Kiss the Girl: The creepy, stalker, possible sexual assault version Aug 28, 2016
- Aug 27, 2016 Damn Canadians are ruining my book. Aug 27, 2016
- Aug 26, 2016 Guess which sister I taught? Aug 26, 2016
- Aug 25, 2016 My daughter demands death. Aug 25, 2016
- Aug 24, 2016 Where the hell is black? Aug 24, 2016
- Aug 23, 2016 Mom and Dad had a reely big show last nite Aug 23, 2016
- Aug 22, 2016 Five year plans are about five years too long Aug 22, 2016
- Aug 21, 2016 The Moth: Two Little Jewish Dicks Aug 21, 2016
- Aug 20, 2016 At least 3 reasons why you should never say "Wish me luck!" Aug 20, 2016
- Aug 19, 2016 The Solar System. Obviously. Aug 19, 2016
- Aug 18, 2016 7 things that we all agree should exist but still don't. Unless you're four years old. Aug 18, 2016
- Aug 17, 2016 Country club dress codes treat adults like children, and yet adults continue to be members of country clubs. I don't get it. Aug 17, 2016
- Aug 16, 2016 The life changing difference between "do" and "don't" Aug 16, 2016
- Aug 15, 2016 If you ever wanted to be a receptionist, perhaps you should think again. Aug 15, 2016
- Aug 14, 2016 If you have strong feelings about cargo shorts, then you are probably an infantile jackass. Aug 14, 2016
- Aug 13, 2016 My son meditates. Seriously. How did this happen? Aug 13, 2016
- Aug 12, 2016 I was a muffin who believed in miracles. Aug 12, 2016
- Aug 11, 2016 The Universal Comeback (I think) Aug 11, 2016
- Aug 10, 2016 Seeking submissions for my annual list of shortcomings and flaws Aug 10, 2016
- Aug 9, 2016 I spent a week backing into parking spots to see if it made any sense. Here is what I discovered. Aug 9, 2016
- Aug 8, 2016 The Peter Principle: Understand it. Aug 8, 2016
- Aug 7, 2016 My children don't understand the purpose or use of a sofa Aug 7, 2016
- Aug 6, 2016 The Moth: A Mop Sink and Maybe God Aug 6, 2016
- Aug 5, 2016 How the Republican Party went from Lincoln to Trump Aug 5, 2016
- Aug 4, 2016 I think my daughter is becoming cool. Aug 4, 2016
- Aug 3, 2016 Unfair assumption: Leaders who park in their privileged parking spots don't get it Aug 3, 2016
- Aug 2, 2016 How to Make a Tennis Ball (also it's impossible to make a tennis ball) Aug 2, 2016
- Aug 1, 2016 Resolution Update: July 2016 Aug 1, 2016
July 2016
- Jul 31, 2016 The Internet is kind and crazy and kind of crazy Jul 31, 2016
- Jul 30, 2016 My son is ready for his next 15 minutes of fame Jul 30, 2016
- Jul 29, 2016 The Moth: She Held My Hand Jul 29, 2016
- Jul 28, 2016 Bill O'Reilly reminds us that the slaves who built the White House were "well fed and had decent lodgings," because why? Jul 28, 2016
- Jul 27, 2016 Writing advice from a toddler that authors should heed carefully Jul 27, 2016
- Jul 26, 2016 11 Absolutely Essential Rules for Restaurateur and Waitstaff in Child-Friendly Restaurants Jul 26, 2016
- Jul 25, 2016 This simple bit of grocery store advice will spare you a lifetime of regret. Give you back hours in your week. Bring sanity back to your everyday life. Jul 25, 2016
- Jul 24, 2016 A Series of Special Guests #9 Jul 24, 2016
- Jul 23, 2016 Passion Lubes makes for outstanding reading. Don't deny yourself this joy. Jul 23, 2016
- Jul 22, 2016 I don't label people as homophobic Jul 22, 2016
- Jul 21, 2016 A decidedly less white bubble on the other side of the aisle Jul 21, 2016
- Jul 20, 2016 Donald Trump. I told you so. Jul 20, 2016
- Jul 19, 2016 Paul Ryan is a boy in a white bubble Jul 19, 2016
- Jul 18, 2016 The Ground Round still exists. Apparently for the hipster cocktail crowd. Jul 18, 2016
- Jul 17, 2016 Unfair assumption #25: People offended by factual corrections are brittle and lame Jul 17, 2016
- Jul 16, 2016 Too Big an Ask Jul 16, 2016
- Jul 15, 2016 July 15, 2006 Jul 15, 2016
- Jul 14, 2016 The UK has a new Prime Minister. Unfortunately, it still has a stupid Queen. Jul 14, 2016
- Jul 13, 2016 Five years ago, I took the stage and told my first story. The most important thing about that night: I was afraid. Jul 13, 2016
- Jul 12, 2016 7 much-needed rules for golf according to me (which makes them absolutely correct) Jul 12, 2016
- Jul 11, 2016 24 life lessons for my children (and perhaps for you) Jul 11, 2016
- Jul 10, 2016 Advice from a mentor from 21 years ago that I continues to guide my life today Jul 10, 2016
- Jul 9, 2016 Unfair assumption #24: Your knowledge of the Supreme Court says a lot about you. Jul 9, 2016
- Jul 8, 2016 Children sleeping in their parent's room: I had strong opinions before I had kids. The results are now in. Jul 8, 2016
- Jul 7, 2016 My kind of princess Jul 7, 2016
- Jul 6, 2016 Perhaps a near-death experience is a good thing. At least one therapist seems to think so. Jul 6, 2016
- Jul 5, 2016 Don't name your child Brenden. I mean Brandon. Jul 5, 2016
- Jul 4, 2016 Unfair assumption #23: People who water their lawns themselves are aggressively anti-efficient and supremely uninteresting Jul 4, 2016
- Jul 3, 2016 The Portland 54: Embrace uncertainty Jul 3, 2016
- Jul 2, 2016 This sign is decidedly less specific than it needs to be Jul 2, 2016
- Jul 1, 2016 Resolution Update: June 2016 plus midyear assessment Jul 1, 2016
June 2016
- Jun 30, 2016 Simple. Hilarious. Makes stupid people look stupid. Everything I want in a two minute video. Jun 30, 2016
- Jun 29, 2016 This is the most inaccurate description of marriage I have ever read. I hope it does not describe your marriage. Jun 29, 2016
- Jun 28, 2016 That ice cream shop that you think is "amazing" or the best? It's not. Jun 28, 2016
- Jun 27, 2016 Unfair assumption #22: People who come from privilege who criticize those who don't come from privilege for their economic circumstances are stupid douchebags Jun 27, 2016
- Jun 26, 2016 Something to make you smile Jun 26, 2016
- Jun 25, 2016 The cough - not the sneeze - deserves the blessing. Jun 25, 2016
- Jun 24, 2016 Paul Ryan (and the Democrats) need my help. I am waiting for their call. Jun 24, 2016
- Jun 23, 2016 Four interesting facts about the song "Laid" that should not only be interesting to me (but probably are). Jun 23, 2016
- Jun 21, 2016 My daughter outlines her position on the accumulation and distribution of capital in a market economy Jun 21, 2016
- Jun 20, 2016 Four things about my children's childhood that I won't miss Jun 20, 2016
- Jun 19, 2016 Best graduation cap ever Jun 19, 2016
- Jun 18, 2016 So much beauty in just two minutes of video. You must see. Jun 18, 2016
- Jun 17, 2016 "Third verse same as the first" is stupid and annoying Jun 17, 2016
- Jun 16, 2016 The world's first decent veggie burger. Not really because it's still a veggie burger, but better. Jun 16, 2016
- Jun 15, 2016 My son has become a non-stop death machine. Jun 15, 2016
- Jun 14, 2016 Staging your home for sale is stupid and self-destructive. Kind of like lipstick. We must end the insanity. Jun 14, 2016
- Jun 13, 2016 The likelihood that your gossip and behind-the-back cruelty will be exposed, expressed in percentages Jun 13, 2016
- Jun 12, 2016 A threat of violence, some moments of real sweetness, and a serious fear of hoes. Jun 12, 2016
- Jun 11, 2016 Sometimes I think I'm living in a movie Jun 11, 2016
- Jun 10, 2016 13 Rules for an Effective (and Perhaps Even Inspiring) Commencement Address Jun 10, 2016
- Jun 9, 2016 Be calm. Jun 9, 2016
- Jun 8, 2016 Review of Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend (and my name change) Jun 8, 2016
- Jun 7, 2016 Go to The Moth and tell a story. And not "someday." Go soon. Jun 7, 2016
- Jun 6, 2016 I have discovered what women look for in a man Jun 6, 2016
- Jun 5, 2016 She would not be happy on a skateboard, but these kids are. Jun 5, 2016
- Jun 4, 2016 Perilous Pizza: The Cook's Cook June/July 2016 edition Jun 4, 2016
- Jun 3, 2016 Dance Recitals: The Joy and the Horror Jun 3, 2016
- Jun 3, 2016 "Just about everybody" I know is not flying on a plane this summer, and to assume otherwise might be an indication of the bubble you live inside. Jun 3, 2016
- Jun 2, 2016 Telling tales: A profile Jun 2, 2016
- Jun 2, 2016 Teachers must stop assigning problems to students in math class, but apparently they need to stop assigning equations, too. Jun 2, 2016
- Jun 1, 2016 Resolution update: May 2016 Jun 1, 2016
May 2016
- May 31, 2016 My first comic books. Too bad I can't show my kids. Or my students. Or anyone squeamish. May 31, 2016
- May 30, 2016 One of the most remarkable pieces of writing in New York Times history - for reasons that will surprise you May 30, 2016
- May 29, 2016 Bill Gates: 5 Books to Read This Summer May 29, 2016
- May 28, 2016 Three shows that every married couple should be watching - and why this is dumb advice May 28, 2016
- May 27, 2016 #Biblebuffet May 27, 2016
- May 26, 2016 I hate meetings this much. May 26, 2016
- May 25, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 28 - Going gray, the reading habits of men, and infertility May 25, 2016
- May 25, 2016 In need of a little quiet May 25, 2016
- May 24, 2016 Teachers: Stop assigning word problems. It's a problem. May 24, 2016
- May 23, 2016 In favor of simplicty May 23, 2016
- May 22, 2016 If I could travel to the past, 13 things I would do differently (without risking my current existence) May 22, 2016
- May 21, 2016 How I don't write May 21, 2016
- May 20, 2016 TEDxTheCountrySchool: Speak Less. Expect More. May 20, 2016
- May 19, 2016 Cold, hard truth from a middle school boy that explains why many people want to succeed but few do. May 19, 2016
- May 18, 2016 Gender reveals: Another example of "Not every thing needs to be a thing" May 18, 2016
- May 17, 2016 What is the longterm impact of not having the support of parents after high school? May 17, 2016
- May 16, 2016 Stop it, teachers: 3 things educators must stop doing now. May 16, 2016
- May 15, 2016 Questions asked so far this morning by my children (ages 7 and 3): May 15, 2016
- May 14, 2016 These people don't know Jesus, and Jesus doesn't give a damn about toilets May 14, 2016
- May 13, 2016 Reach out to a teacher. We want to hear from you. May 13, 2016
- May 12, 2016 My former students discover that their teacher is still alive (and maybe doing cool things) thanks to The Moth May 12, 2016
- May 11, 2016 This update to "Ironic" is a beautiful thing May 11, 2016
- May 10, 2016 This hoodie is real. You won't think so, but I promise you. This is a real thing. May 10, 2016
- May 9, 2016 Serious question: Why isn't religious hypocrisy used more often against the opponents to same sex marriage? May 9, 2016
- May 8, 2016 After almost getting my wife nothing on Mother's Day, it turns out that I gave her a lot. The list is extraordinary. May 8, 2016
- May 8, 2016 Where have all the rebels gone? May 8, 2016
- May 7, 2016 Sometimes I think I live in "Leave It To Beaver" May 7, 2016
- May 6, 2016 Harlem Knight Fight May 6, 2016
- May 5, 2016 Kids are great, but they ruin everything. Especially your peace of mind about the future of the planet. May 5, 2016
- May 5, 2016 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend is a Nutmeg nominee! May 5, 2016
- May 5, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 26 - Boy vs. Wife and Girl vs. Husband May 5, 2016
- May 4, 2016 The worst person in the world May 4, 2016
- May 3, 2016 The reverse nap. The Trump nomination. Female eligibility in the military draft. People thought I was crazy all three times. Now I get to say those four glorious words. May 3, 2016
- May 2, 2016 When kids rule the world, it will be a fantastic place. But perhaps not always professional. May 2, 2016
- May 1, 2016 Resolution update: April 2016 May 1, 2016
April 2016
- Apr 30, 2016 Owen: 2000-2016 Apr 30, 2016
- Apr 29, 2016 A broken lawnmower, a fifth grade boy, and CragsList.com make me wonder if God is real. Apr 29, 2016
- Apr 28, 2016 A question I don't want my wife to be asked Apr 28, 2016
- Apr 27, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 25 - Income in Dating, Mansplaining, and Tallywackers Apr 27, 2016
- Apr 27, 2016 Firemen became firefighters. Penmanship became handwriting. Great. But there's one gender neutral word I can't support. Apr 27, 2016
- Apr 26, 2016 #Biblebuffet Apr 26, 2016
- Apr 25, 2016 Every thing doesn't need to be a thing Apr 25, 2016
- Apr 24, 2016 From the mouths of babes... Apr 24, 2016
- Apr 23, 2016 Opposing Donald Trump while defending one or more of his positions is not doubly odd. It's called objectivity. Apr 23, 2016
- Apr 22, 2016 Mike Pesca's favorite sentences of 2015 (and mine) Apr 22, 2016
- Apr 21, 2016 A fashion designer who doesn't know she's a fashion designer Apr 21, 2016
- Apr 20, 2016 "Close to the chest" or "close to the vest?" The answer annoys the hell out of me. Apr 20, 2016
- Apr 20, 2016 Seasons: Spring 2106 Apr 20, 2016
- Apr 19, 2016 I've never done this medically inadvisable thing that you probably do often Apr 19, 2016
- Apr 18, 2016 Boy in blanket fort offers lesson on happiness Apr 18, 2016
- Apr 17, 2016 An important (and painful) lesson about the people closest to me and the things I write Apr 17, 2016
- Apr 16, 2016 An important corollary on the two greatest super powers of all time Apr 16, 2016
- Apr 15, 2016 When I watch children's television, I ask questions about fictional funding (or the lack thereof) Apr 15, 2016
- Apr 14, 2016 A not-so-disappointing disappointing night at The Moth Apr 14, 2016
- Apr 13, 2016 My wife doesn't jump into the shower with me on a regular basis, but this thing about her parents is a close second. Apr 13, 2016
- Apr 12, 2016 Why I think professional wrestling is stupid Apr 12, 2016
- Apr 11, 2016 The two best super powers of all time (one of them is not teleportation) Apr 11, 2016
- Apr 10, 2016 Clara on Picasso Apr 10, 2016
- Apr 8, 2016 The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs: The paperback cover Apr 8, 2016
- Apr 7, 2016 My son, the storyteller. I had no idea. Apr 7, 2016
- Apr 6, 2016 Possibly the perfect outgoing voicemail message Apr 6, 2016
- Apr 5, 2016 #Biblebuffet Apr 5, 2016
- Apr 4, 2016 internet at last Apr 4, 2016
- Apr 3, 2016 #Biblebuffet Apr 3, 2016
- Apr 2, 2016 TEDxNatick: Love Life Like You Are 100 Years Old Apr 2, 2016
- Apr 1, 2016 Resolution update: March 2016 Apr 1, 2016
March 2016
- Mar 31, 2016 The secret to great storytelling: Make the big moments incredibly small. Or find your tiny moments and tell just them. Mar 31, 2016
- Mar 30, 2016 Roman creativity when it came to punishing those who murdered their fathers astounds me. Mar 30, 2016
- Mar 29, 2016 If you're using The Bible to support your opposition to same sex marriage and transgender restroom choice, you're simply obsessed with penises and vaginas. Mar 29, 2016
- Mar 25, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 20A and 20B - Twenty Questions Mar 25, 2016
- Mar 25, 2016 My children are stars in an Instagram ad. Apparently the entire world has seen it. Mar 25, 2016
- Mar 24, 2016 The Moth brought me and my elementary school principal back together Mar 24, 2016
- Mar 23, 2016 The best worst magic show ever Mar 23, 2016
- Mar 22, 2016 Four rules about being precious about your stuff Mar 22, 2016
- Mar 21, 2016 Caught in the Middle: A musical filled with stolen words, purloined ideas, and personal philosophy Mar 21, 2016
- Mar 20, 2016 You have to admire a true artisan Mar 20, 2016
- Mar 19, 2016 Text and photo combo of the week Mar 19, 2016
- Mar 18, 2016 A very special chair and a recommendation to librarians everywhere Mar 18, 2016
- Mar 17, 2016 I found someone who thinks EXACTLY like I do. Almost as if I put the words right into her heart and mind. Mar 17, 2016
- Mar 16, 2016 A peek into a typical day of our marriage Mar 16, 2016
- Mar 15, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 18 - Pants, Lands End, and military service Mar 15, 2016
- Mar 15, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 19 - Wedding proposals, politics, and frats Mar 15, 2016
- Mar 15, 2016 Clara's best bad behavior Mar 15, 2016
- Mar 14, 2016 The worst name for a food item in all of human history Mar 14, 2016
- Mar 13, 2016 27 Things I Wish I Had Known 10 Years Earlier Mar 13, 2016
- Mar 12, 2016 A famous writer and I agree on the worst part of sleep Mar 12, 2016
- Mar 11, 2016 She wrote "No." My heart soared. Mar 11, 2016
- Mar 9, 2016 Deep, scary, philosophical Star Trek thoughts. Mar 9, 2016
- Mar 8, 2016 Few things are as bad as we want people to think. I think. Mar 8, 2016
- Mar 7, 2016 There was a lot wrong with the 1970's, but these two things might have made up for it. Mar 7, 2016
- Mar 7, 2016 My son has cleverly ensured future access to my phone Mar 7, 2016
- Mar 6, 2016 A simple geographic reminder to those overly insistent, overly-aggressive people of faith Mar 6, 2016
- Mar 5, 2016 Listen to this. Mar 5, 2016
- Mar 4, 2016 Charlie's all-too familiar existentialist dilemma Mar 4, 2016
- Mar 3, 2016 FYI: "Drives me up the wall" is an idiom. Mar 3, 2016
- Mar 3, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 17 - Sexy voice, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model, and Cuddling Mar 3, 2016
- Mar 2, 2016 This made me a little weepy. I'm obviously broken inside. Mar 2, 2016
- Mar 1, 2016 Resolution update: February 2016 Mar 1, 2016
February 2016
- Feb 29, 2016 People I don't understand: Motionless telephone talkers Feb 29, 2016
- Feb 28, 2016 Star Wars will have gay characters. Bigoted heads presumably explode like Alderaan. Feb 28, 2016
- Feb 27, 2016 Caught in the Middle: Our world premier! Feb 27, 2016
- Feb 26, 2016 A rule for lifelong happiness: Stop begrudging the good fortune of others. Feb 26, 2016
- Feb 25, 2016 #TBT - My first! Also, I finally understand what the hashtag means. Feb 25, 2016
- Feb 24, 2016 Hidden gems on my daughter's bookshelf and in my teaching career Feb 24, 2016
- Feb 23, 2016 The Moth: A Strip Club of my Own Making Feb 23, 2016
- Feb 22, 2016 Not quite immortality, but 95 is a decent start. Feb 22, 2016
- Feb 21, 2016 This history lesson is unlike anything I've ever seen before. YOU MUST WATCH. Feb 21, 2016
- Feb 20, 2016 Don't speak to old people like they're children or houseplants, damn it. Feb 20, 2016
- Feb 19, 2016 My son is starting to like Star Wars. Also, he calls it Star Whores, which led me to Ken and his dad. Feb 19, 2016
- Feb 18, 2016 How I became a storyteller (and many other things) Feb 18, 2016
- Feb 17, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 15 - Boy bands, men's grooming, and size matters Feb 17, 2016
- Feb 17, 2016 Thank you notes: Should you send an email or write a note? Feb 17, 2016
- Feb 16, 2016 Let languages die. Feb 16, 2016
- Feb 15, 2016 Little Boy Wants to Read. Badly. Feb 15, 2016
- Feb 14, 2016 This is exactly what you need to accomplish your goals. Nothing more. Feb 14, 2016
- Feb 13, 2016 High ranking United States generals finally agree with me on the military draft - 21 years later Feb 13, 2016
- Feb 12, 2016 Question: Which person alive today deserves immortality for the sake of future generations? Feb 12, 2016
- Feb 11, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 14 - Girl Scout Cookies, Valentine's Day, and Schlongs Feb 11, 2016
- Feb 10, 2016 Jefferson Airplane, Jefferson Starship, Starship and one unbelievably bizarre video. Feb 10, 2016
- Feb 9, 2016 The two birthday gifts you should be asking for above all others Feb 9, 2016
- Feb 8, 2016 I was bullied by a bunch of middle-aged pencil pushers. And it hurt. Feb 8, 2016
- Feb 8, 2016 Impressive vocabulary and outstanding musical taste Feb 8, 2016
- Feb 7, 2016 Two Divorces Too Many: Oldie but goodie pops up in an unexpected place Feb 7, 2016
- Feb 6, 2016 Two Divorces Too Many Feb 6, 2016
- Feb 6, 2016 Large, lumbering, white men playing basketball. Probably poorly. Feb 6, 2016
- Feb 5, 2016 Embrace the snow day. The future is unknown. And possibly deadly. Feb 5, 2016
- Feb 4, 2016 A simple and perfect solution to the "10 items or less" offenders Feb 4, 2016
- Feb 3, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 13 - Disney Princesses, Modern Day Uniforms & Tighty Whities Feb 3, 2016
- Feb 3, 2016 Enough power? Feb 3, 2016
- Feb 2, 2016 "An urban community" is a far cry from eating paste Feb 2, 2016
- Feb 1, 2016 Resolution update: January 2016 Feb 1, 2016
January 2016
- Jan 31, 2016 My children take selfies now, and I'm glad. Jan 31, 2016
- Jan 30, 2016 Richard Marx is trapped in my head, and I didn't even know it. Jan 30, 2016
- Jan 29, 2016 The Name Game Jan 29, 2016
- Jan 28, 2016 Three Things I Eat Oddly Jan 28, 2016
- Jan 27, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 12 - The Rachel-less Episode Jan 27, 2016
- Jan 27, 2016 A Giants fan enacts a random and nonsensical act of football hatred upon a Patriots fan Jan 27, 2016
- Jan 26, 2016 Heart beeps Jan 26, 2016
- Jan 25, 2016 Clara Susan: January 26, 2009 Jan 25, 2016
- Jan 25, 2016 Professional Best Man (and the amazing things that have happened since I first proposed this job) Jan 25, 2016
- Jan 24, 2016 Whitesboro: You will not believe that this situation exists. Jan 24, 2016
- Jan 23, 2016 Football hurts me. Serious injuries. Still, who wants to play tackle football with me? Jan 23, 2016
- Jan 22, 2016 Wonder Woman's invisible jet is stupid. Jan 22, 2016
- Jan 21, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 11 - New Year's Resolutions, Driving, and I WAS GROPED ON THE POLAR EXPRESS! Jan 21, 2016
- Jan 21, 2016 Losing can be so entertaining when it's not you. Jan 21, 2016
- Jan 20, 2016 A washing machine, a trampoline, a brick, and a little bit of joy Jan 20, 2016
- Jan 19, 2016 What is sexy? (according to Jerry Seinfeld and me) Jan 19, 2016
- Jan 18, 2016 Butchers and doctors should not look alike. Jan 18, 2016
- Jan 17, 2016 The "I told you so" calendar. Armed and ready for 2035. I can't recommend it highly enough. Jan 17, 2016
- Jan 16, 2016 BCE and CE Jan 16, 2016
- Jan 15, 2016 Finalized New Year's resolutions for 2016 (including three new goals) Jan 15, 2016
- Jan 14, 2016 Rugged good looks. Beautiful wives. No java. Jan 14, 2016
- Jan 13, 2016 Cruelest joke of 2015 involved a beautiful new baby and Bill Cosby Jan 13, 2016
- Jan 12, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 10 - Three Mystery Topics Jan 12, 2016
- Jan 12, 2016 Fruit Loop freak Jan 12, 2016
- Jan 12, 2016 The strangest thing about the octopus. Jan 12, 2016
- Jan 11, 2016 8 things I have never done that you probably have (now with the much-requested rationales behind each) Jan 11, 2016
- Jan 10, 2016 Six things you have probably done that I have not. Intentionally. Jan 10, 2016
- Jan 9, 2016 It's better to love because it makes you better than other people, which is extremely satisfying. Jan 9, 2016
- Jan 8, 2016 Jim and Pam are still together. There is hope. Jan 8, 2016
- Jan 7, 2016 The many faces of a little reader Jan 7, 2016
- Jan 6, 2016 If you're going to disagree with the President, try not to be illogical while doing so. Jan 6, 2016
- Jan 5, 2016 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 9 - The girl tax, chicks and dudes, and a lady's legs Jan 5, 2016
- Jan 5, 2016 I celebrated my Christmas in the company of strangers Jan 5, 2016
- Jan 4, 2016 Haiku Jan 4, 2016
- Jan 3, 2016 My daughter needs to learn about Marc Antony. And I'm not talking about the singer. Jan 3, 2016
- Jan 2, 2016 My 13 New Year's resolutions for the NFL Jan 2, 2016
- Jan 1, 2016 New Year's resolutions: 2016 Jan 1, 2016
December 2015
- Dec 31, 2015 Resolution update: 2015 in review Dec 31, 2015
- Dec 30, 2015 A goal for 2016: An agreement that these parents are awful, disgusting, rotten people Dec 30, 2015
- Dec 29, 2015 The big sleep is killing me. Dec 29, 2015
- Dec 28, 2015 My daughter was annoyed with Mrs. Claus - and let her have it. Dec 28, 2015
- Dec 27, 2015 The Moth: Death by Bee Sting Dec 27, 2015
- Dec 26, 2015 My 2015 Christmas haul Dec 26, 2015
- Dec 26, 2015 Awful Jeb Bush asks supporters for $25 in exchange for leaving them the hell alone. Seriously. Dec 26, 2015
- Dec 25, 2015 How to be uninteresting with fruits and vegetables Dec 25, 2015
- Dec 24, 2015 Jigsaw puzzles are a terrible, rotten, no good, very bad gift. Dec 24, 2015
- Dec 24, 2015 I have a story on The Moth Radio Hour and podcast this week! Dec 24, 2015
- Dec 23, 2015 An essential quote for parents and teachers who are struggling with discipline Dec 23, 2015
- Dec 23, 2015 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 7: Babysitters, chivalry and taking out the trash Dec 23, 2015
- Dec 22, 2015 A possible cure for writer's block Dec 22, 2015
- Dec 21, 2015 I've switched from PC to Mac. I have six complaints. Dec 21, 2015
- Dec 20, 2015 Tableside preparation of guacamole is stupid. For many reasons. Dec 20, 2015
- Dec 19, 2015 Connor the Unicorn is missing. It's freakin' annoying. Dec 19, 2015
- Dec 18, 2015 Goals for 2016: Tell me what to do. Dec 18, 2015
- Dec 17, 2015 Target Practice - Seasons: Winter 2015 Dec 17, 2015
- Dec 17, 2015 A whiskey ad, made by two amateur filmmakers, did this to me. Dec 17, 2015
- Dec 16, 2015 This man could have been ripped from one of my novels Dec 16, 2015
- Dec 15, 2015 Afraid of identity theft? Here's a simple solution: Lie Dec 15, 2015
- Dec 14, 2015 TEDx Berkshires: Homework for Life Dec 14, 2015
- Dec 13, 2015 TEDxNatick: "Live Life Like Your 100 Year-Old Self" Dec 13, 2015
- Dec 12, 2015 Rose City Park Church: The sign is real, and the message is fantastic, despite my suggestions for revision. Dec 12, 2015
- Dec 11, 2015 3 verbal tics that you must stop Dec 11, 2015
- Dec 10, 2015 For the friend who has everything, the perfect holiday gift... Dec 10, 2015
- Dec 9, 2015 The oddities of becoming a somewhat (but not famous) public figure Dec 9, 2015
- Dec 9, 2015 Boy Vs. Girl - Episode #5: The Military Draft, Man Vs. Wild, and Grudges Dec 9, 2015
- Dec 8, 2015 Hire this guy. And please don't do anything like this to my Wikipedia page. Dec 8, 2015
- Dec 7, 2015 The Patriots lost yesterday. I'm a happy Patriots fan today. You should be, too. Dec 7, 2015
- Dec 6, 2015 The Book With No Pictures: Best testimonial for the book ever Dec 6, 2015
- Dec 5, 2015 Change can happen. Change does happen. You probably don't believe this. So let me show you this bicycle. Dec 5, 2015
- Dec 4, 2015 My latest appearance on Mom and Dad Are Fighting: Discussing violent tragedy with children Dec 4, 2015
- Dec 4, 2015 Perspective Dec 4, 2015
- Dec 3, 2015 A simple test to determine if a food is objectively tasty Dec 3, 2015
- Dec 2, 2015 Boy Vs. Girl: Episode 4: Barbie, Heels, and Penis Doodles Dec 2, 2015
- Dec 2, 2015 The Moth: The Great Stargazing Betrayal Dec 2, 2015
- Dec 1, 2015 Resolution Update: November 2015 Dec 1, 2015
November 2015
- Nov 30, 2015 Naked booby traps: It's apparently a thing. Sadly, my wife is not involved. Nov 30, 2015
- Nov 29, 2015 Four pieces of perfect truth on the nature of writing and work by Dan Kennedy Nov 29, 2015
- Nov 28, 2015 The very best way to earn a dollar Nov 28, 2015
- Nov 27, 2015 The secret to being brave - revealed by a six year-old girl Nov 27, 2015
- Nov 26, 2015 Today I give thanks for something intangible and improbable and incredibly powerful Nov 26, 2015
- Nov 25, 2015 My visit to Northshire Bookstore: Cakes designed to look like books and a mysterious comment left unexplained Nov 25, 2015
- Nov 24, 2015 A theory on the funniness of people who routinely interrupt others Nov 24, 2015
- Nov 23, 2015 Some days are just a "pants on your head" kind of day Nov 23, 2015
- Nov 22, 2015 How I Let Down My Forever Friend Nov 22, 2015
- Nov 22, 2015 An excellent explanation of Syria's war Nov 22, 2015
- Nov 21, 2015 Millennials are living at home in greater numbers than ever before. Are they just overly indulged wimps? Nov 21, 2015
- Nov 20, 2015 Stop saying that women are beautiful. Nov 20, 2015
- Nov 19, 2015 I have seen the devil, and he looks something like this. Nov 19, 2015
- Nov 18, 2015 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 3 - Gender-Neutral Bathrooms, Salutations, and Bathing Suit Bottoms Nov 18, 2015
- Nov 17, 2015 Two death bed mysteries and one piece of death bed advice Nov 17, 2015
- Nov 16, 2015 7 more ways that saboteurs attempt to destroy workplace productivity Nov 16, 2015
- Nov 15, 2015 Underoos: Possibly inappropriate. Mildly exploitative. Creepy, even? Nov 15, 2015
- Nov 14, 2015 My "Diet Coke and aggressive attitude" didn't exactly match the yoga aesthetic, but I somehow managed to fit in anyway. Nov 14, 2015
- Nov 13, 2015 If only we all had this problem... Nov 13, 2015
- Nov 12, 2015 100 Most Evil People Ever Experiment Nov 12, 2015
- Nov 11, 2015 The truth will set you free Nov 11, 2015
- Nov 11, 2015 Boy vs. Girl: Episode 2 - Insult Culture, Female Sports Fans, and the Need for Snuggies Nov 11, 2015
- Nov 10, 2015 Would it be wrong for me to encourage my students to memorize this? Nov 10, 2015
- Nov 9, 2015 There are saboteurs in your organization, purposefully damaging productivity and morale. Here are 16 ways to spot them. Nov 9, 2015
- Nov 8, 2015 It is strange that I love both of these things equally? Nov 8, 2015
- Nov 7, 2015 A simple, secret strategy to handling rude people and achieving victory Nov 7, 2015
- Nov 6, 2015 Charlie reads "I Want My Hat Back." And you will melt. Nov 6, 2015
- Nov 5, 2015 The thing my daughter does for which I am most proud Nov 5, 2015
- Nov 4, 2015 Boy Vs. Girl: Episode 1 of our new podcast launches today! Nov 4, 2015
- Nov 3, 2015 The most difficult (and possibly inappropriate) question asked on book tour thus far Nov 3, 2015
- Nov 2, 2015 A lesson on the importance of stakes in storytelling - Plus the story of the day I posed as a charity worker for nefarious reasons Nov 2, 2015
- Nov 1, 2015 Resolution Update: October 2015 Nov 1, 2015
October 2015
- Oct 31, 2015 My daughter's editorial proclivities bring me such joy for one special reason. Oct 31, 2015
- Oct 30, 2015 This might be the worst deal in baseball history. Or at least the most ridiculous. Oct 30, 2015
- Oct 29, 2015 Hindsight is rarely 20/20, so stop saying otherwise. Oct 29, 2015
- Oct 28, 2015 We encourage children to seek truth and knowledge in this world except when it comes to this. Oct 28, 2015
- Oct 27, 2015 Look what you can do with a full head of hair. Oct 27, 2015
- Oct 26, 2015 Verbal sparring: "A bad day" is not an excuse to behave badly. Oct 26, 2015
- Oct 25, 2015 3 petty bits of nonsense that should never bother you (unless you are equally petty) Oct 25, 2015
- Oct 24, 2015 Music is not the most important part of my job as a wedding DJ. Oct 24, 2015
- Oct 23, 2015 My daughter betrayed me. I'll say it doesn't hurt, but truthfully, it hurts a lot. Oct 23, 2015
- Oct 23, 2015 Is this real? Oct 23, 2015
- Oct 22, 2015 Little girl makes little boy's dream come true. Oct 22, 2015
- Oct 21, 2015 The Moth: Sex and Frozen Corn Oct 21, 2015
- Oct 20, 2015 Management: Please stop signing your signs. It looks ridiculous and serves no useful purpose. Oct 20, 2015
- Oct 19, 2015 13 Principles of Teaching Oct 19, 2015
- Oct 18, 2015 A man who is proving that nothing is as complicated as people think or want it to be. Oct 18, 2015
- Oct 17, 2015 5 new rules of etiquette in the digital world Oct 17, 2015
- Oct 16, 2015 How to graduate with an Associate's, Bachelor's and Master's degrees without ever taking the SAT or completing a college application (or paying tuition!) Oct 16, 2015
- Oct 15, 2015 First they dance. Then they attack. Kind of viciously. Oct 15, 2015
- Oct 14, 2015 The worst thing about parenting just got a whole lot better. Oct 14, 2015
- Oct 13, 2015 An observation about the movie Stormpiercer that will blow your mind. Maybe. Oct 13, 2015
- Oct 12, 2015 Celebrating Columbus Day is one of the stupidest things that Americans do. Let's replace it with this amazing Russian holiday. Oct 12, 2015
- Oct 11, 2015 My daughter has become a same-sex marriage activist and a storytelling promoter Oct 11, 2015
- Oct 10, 2015 The conspiracy of the uninvited, unannounced pickle must end. Oct 10, 2015
- Oct 9, 2015 I'm doing my first full hour onstage for the Pound Ridge Storytelling Festival on Saturday night. And I'm a little nervous, which almost never happens. Here's why: Oct 9, 2015
- Oct 9, 2015 My daughter's amazing list of proposed weekend activities Oct 9, 2015
- Oct 8, 2015 Announcing your goals makes it less likely that you will achieve them, but what if you're not an idiot? Oct 8, 2015
- Oct 8, 2015 Hot Buzz for Books 2015 Oct 8, 2015
- Oct 7, 2015 This is a contract from hell. Or heaven, depending on your current disposition and predilections. Oct 7, 2015
- Oct 6, 2015 Sometimes a student writes a sentence that I wish I had written. This is one of them. Oct 6, 2015
- Oct 5, 2015 I hit the greatest golf shot of my life. Then a squirrel did something even more amazing. Oct 5, 2015
- Oct 4, 2015 The Gist: My Orange Thong and Lucky Star story Oct 4, 2015
- Oct 3, 2015 I thought I became a teacher because I love kids, but it turns out that the real reason was far more selfish and insidious Oct 3, 2015
- Oct 2, 2015 Resolution update: September 2015 Oct 2, 2015
September 2015
- Sep 30, 2015 Unfair assumption #21: John Smith is not a good name Sep 30, 2015
- Sep 29, 2015 Rumspringa: If only every parent possessed the open mindedness of the bad ass Amish Sep 29, 2015
- Sep 28, 2015 My unconventional advice for the expecting parent (or the less experienced parent) Sep 28, 2015
- Sep 27, 2015 Owl hunters interrupt fiction writer's flow Sep 27, 2015
- Sep 26, 2015 My six-year old daughter understands the nature of religious texts better than many Republican candidates Sep 26, 2015
- Sep 25, 2015 A character from The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs comes alive. Seriously. Sep 25, 2015
- Sep 24, 2015 Pulling loose teeth just got more profitable. And strange. Sep 24, 2015
- Sep 23, 2015 God doesn't want you to dress up in order to worship him. In fact, he would prefer that you dress down. Sep 23, 2015
- Sep 22, 2015 My daughter's first homework assignment: First steps on a rotten road Sep 22, 2015
- Sep 22, 2015 I want more politicians like this. Sep 22, 2015
- Sep 21, 2015 Recommended Reading Sep 21, 2015
- Sep 20, 2015 Brilliant use of chalk Sep 20, 2015
- Sep 19, 2015 This video encompasses so many of my fears for my students Sep 19, 2015
- Sep 18, 2015 My book launch party was filled with many surprise guests and references to Dungeons & Dragons Sep 18, 2015
- Sep 18, 2015 Unfair assumption #20: The use of absolutes in combination with the personal pronoun is an intelligence and personality indicator. Sep 18, 2015
- Sep 16, 2015 Productivity tip: Back up your phone, damn it. Sep 16, 2015
- Sep 15, 2015 There are three incredibly stupid things wrong with this sign. Can you spot them all? Sep 15, 2015
- Sep 14, 2015 Smart, book person and crazed football fan does not always compute. Sep 14, 2015
- Sep 13, 2015 Verbal Sparring: Flip and Own Sep 13, 2015
- Sep 12, 2015 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend: Fan art Sep 12, 2015
- Sep 11, 2015 Can't fight logic like this. Sep 11, 2015
- Sep 10, 2015 They may be teenage boys, but they are also a couple of pathetic cowards. Sep 10, 2015
- Sep 9, 2015 Publicity for The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs Sep 9, 2015
- Sep 8, 2015 The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs: Pub day has finally arrived! Sep 8, 2015
- Sep 7, 2015 Mashable on The Moth Sep 7, 2015
- Sep 6, 2015 The worst thing you can say to a storyteller (you passive-aggressive douchebag) Sep 6, 2015
- Sep 5, 2015 I blame my wife. Sep 5, 2015
- Sep 4, 2015 How to Age Gracefully Sep 4, 2015
- Sep 3, 2015 Audio excerpt of The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs Sep 3, 2015
- Sep 3, 2015 Booklist, Kirkus, and Library Journal review The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs Sep 3, 2015
- Sep 2, 2015 My book launch party: Who's coming? Sep 2, 2015
- Sep 1, 2015 I am not talented. I am only tenacious. Sep 1, 2015
August 2015
- Aug 31, 2015 Resolution update: August 2015 Aug 31, 2015
- Aug 30, 2015 My son says the funniest things. In retrospect. Aug 30, 2015
- Aug 29, 2015 We The Stupid Aug 29, 2015
- Aug 29, 2015 Creativity fail Aug 29, 2015
- Aug 28, 2015 Mom and Dad Are Fighting: The Back to School Edition Aug 28, 2015
- Aug 28, 2015 Three siblings. All hit by cars. It's weird. Right? Aug 28, 2015
- Aug 27, 2015 How to make a reader in one easy, high effective step Aug 27, 2015
- Aug 26, 2015 The hardest part about my visit to Brazil Aug 26, 2015
- Aug 25, 2015 A possibly faceitious question about his penis Aug 25, 2015
- Aug 24, 2015 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2015 Aug 24, 2015
- Aug 23, 2015 Dirt Mountain Aug 23, 2015
- Aug 22, 2015 When in Brazil, go see Judy. Aug 22, 2015
- Aug 21, 2015 Observations from a week in Brazil Aug 21, 2015
- Aug 20, 2015 "Hate is a strong word." It's also not so strong a word. So let's stop saying otherwise. Aug 20, 2015
- Aug 19, 2015 Reading & Writing podcast interview Aug 19, 2015
- Aug 18, 2015 Five of my more anomalous wedding anomalies (i.e. strangest clients ever) Aug 18, 2015
- Aug 18, 2015 Slate's The Gist appearance: Where to Find the Best Stories Aug 18, 2015
- Aug 17, 2015 Lip-syncing made hilarious Aug 17, 2015
- Aug 17, 2015 A hidden penis is always a problem Aug 17, 2015
- Aug 16, 2015 My former students occupy such important spaces in my life Aug 16, 2015
- Aug 15, 2015 Brazilian exit signs are unnerving Aug 15, 2015
- Aug 14, 2015 When you're transmitting information to an audience, be entertaining. Even if it's simply a sign. Aug 14, 2015
- Aug 13, 2015 The plague of the mason jar: Let us pray that it has reached its peak. Aug 13, 2015
- Aug 12, 2015 How the brain got its name Aug 12, 2015
- Aug 11, 2015 When it comes to Brazil, I am basically an infant. Aug 11, 2015
- Aug 11, 2015 Best worst best interview ever Aug 11, 2015
- Aug 10, 2015 Don't don't judge me. Aug 10, 2015
- Aug 9, 2015 A terrible break in routine Aug 9, 2015
- Aug 8, 2015 Whale watch was both perfect and perfectly disgusting. Aug 8, 2015
- Aug 7, 2015 Can someone please explain these bumper stickers to me? Aug 7, 2015
- Aug 6, 2015 Our babysitter is making me look like a bad parent Aug 6, 2015
- Aug 6, 2015 Worst TEDx luck ever Aug 6, 2015
- Aug 5, 2015 Productivity tip: 14 Reasons Why People Cannot or Will Not Delegate Responsibilities Aug 5, 2015
- Aug 4, 2015 The three most confident words in the English language Aug 4, 2015
- Aug 3, 2015 Single use restrooms in all public venues must be made unisex because not doing so is stupid. Aug 3, 2015
- Aug 2, 2015 ESPN's Jason Whitlock asked a bunch of stupid questions about Robert Kraft, so I answered them. It's a good strategy when faced with dumb, rhetorical questions. Aug 2, 2015
- Aug 1, 2015 Resolution update: July 2015 Aug 1, 2015
July 2015
- Jul 31, 2015 One of the most horrifying and disgusting things that has ever happened to me couldn't spoil my day Jul 31, 2015
- Jul 30, 2015 Sequel protection service: Alias Jul 30, 2015
- Jul 29, 2015 How to annoy a child Jul 29, 2015
- Jul 28, 2015 Even I was silenced by this horrific scene of sexism and misplaced cold drink cups Jul 28, 2015
- Jul 27, 2015 “If you’re going to have a difficult life, it might as well be childhood, since it’s so short” might be the dumbest thing ever said. Jul 27, 2015
- Jul 26, 2015 My daughter manages money better than most Americans. And unlike me, her savings weren't eaten by a dog named after a video game. Jul 26, 2015
- Jul 25, 2015 I hate this kid. Jul 25, 2015
- Jul 24, 2015 This phone call apparently went well. Jul 24, 2015
- Jul 24, 2015 Half years are stupid. Jul 24, 2015
- Jul 23, 2015 Clara's Mid-Summer Bucket List Jul 23, 2015
- Jul 22, 2015 Are you faithful to your spouse? It's less common than you might think. Jul 22, 2015
- Jul 21, 2015 A simple solution for Scott Walker's uncertainty Jul 21, 2015
- Jul 20, 2015 The best marital advice you'll ever receive (and some thoughts on same sex marriage, too) Jul 20, 2015
- Jul 19, 2015 Brace yourself for the cutest thing EVER (not one bit of hyperbole) Jul 19, 2015
- Jul 18, 2015 Dentists need to tell stories, or they will end up with people like me in their chairs. Jul 18, 2015
- Jul 17, 2015 The next time you see or hear a story about the British royalty, I suggest this response: Jul 17, 2015
- Jul 16, 2015 First review of The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs arrives! Jul 16, 2015
- Jul 16, 2015 Don Featherstone was an interesting man for at least two reasons. Also, the mysteries of 57 and matchy-matchy remain unsolved, and it's really bothering me. Jul 16, 2015
- Jul 15, 2015 A brilliant app idea that I'm giving away for free. Take it. Make it. I'll be your first customer. Jul 15, 2015
- Jul 14, 2015 If I ruled the world, here are 11 laws that I would immediately enact. Jul 14, 2015
- Jul 13, 2015 THE GREATEST APP RECOMMENDATION OF ALL TIME: Wakie Jul 13, 2015
- Jul 12, 2015 Some fun facts are just facts Jul 12, 2015
- Jul 11, 2015 There are so many things wrong with this sign. Jul 11, 2015
- Jul 10, 2015 Naked clog fighting. Let me say that again: NAKED CLOG FIGHTING. Jul 10, 2015
- Jul 10, 2015 A restroom puzzle: How exactly is this configuration of toilets supposed to work? Jul 10, 2015
- Jul 9, 2015 Watching "Jaws" while floating in a murky pond at night helps explain why storytelling continues to gain in popularity Jul 9, 2015
- Jul 8, 2015 Why I choose to write in McDonald's Jul 8, 2015
- Jul 7, 2015 Sticks & Stones made it to the stage! I could not have done it alone. Jul 7, 2015
- Jul 6, 2015 Five important questions to ask about a religion before joining (or choosing to remain a member) Jul 6, 2015
- Jul 5, 2015 Would you share your toothbrush with a loved one? Or anyone? Jul 5, 2015
- Jul 4, 2015 Tennis balls are almost entirely flattened when struck by a racquet Jul 4, 2015
- Jul 3, 2015 This thing exists. Jul 3, 2015
- Jul 3, 2015 6 thoughts about this crazy-ass video from CatholicVote.org Jul 3, 2015
- Jul 2, 2015 The Moth makes it into the pages of Newsweek, and I play a teeny tiny role. Jul 2, 2015
- Jul 2, 2015 Republicans run the risk of becoming the latest version of George Wallace Jul 2, 2015
- Jul 1, 2015 I hate broccoli and kale and cabbage, and the reason is science. Maybe. Jul 1, 2015
June 2015
- Jun 30, 2015 If you want us to be quiet, please ask quietly. Jun 30, 2015
- Jun 30, 2015 Resolution update June 2015 Jun 30, 2015
- Jun 29, 2015 "Bigot" is a strong word to label a person opposed to same sex marriage. Is it the correct word? Jun 29, 2015
- Jun 28, 2015 The truth behind Gilligan's Island is AMAZING. Jun 28, 2015
- Jun 27, 2015 Apple's desire to eliminate as many ports as possible on their laptops may be aesthetically pleasing, but it's also a pain in the ass. Jun 27, 2015
- Jun 27, 2015 Bad week for bigots. Good week for progressives. Conservatives? It depends. Jun 27, 2015
- Jun 26, 2015 I scheduled my book launch party on Rosh Hashanah for one very good reason. Jun 26, 2015
- Jun 25, 2015 If I can't have actual immortality, this would be an acceptable alternative: Jun 25, 2015
- Jun 24, 2015 I expected to annoy a lot of readers, but I wrote it anyway. Jun 24, 2015
- Jun 23, 2015 Best compliments of my life, including an addition to the list. You, too, should keep a list. Jun 23, 2015
- Jun 23, 2015 This kid might be too relaxed. Jun 23, 2015
- Jun 22, 2015 Creativity is collaboration. As a storyteller, I stand on the shoulders of real life storytelling ninjas. Jun 22, 2015
- Jun 21, 2015 I taught my son to pee on a tree. Is this normal? Jun 21, 2015
- Jun 21, 2015 Super model in training Jun 21, 2015
- Jun 20, 2015 First and last day of kindergarten Jun 20, 2015
- Jun 20, 2015 Instead of spending money in an unsafe, unfair Why not just manicure and pedicure each other? Jun 20, 2015
- Jun 19, 2015 Immaturity: A teacher's greatest weapon (according to at least one student) Jun 19, 2015
- Jun 18, 2015 Stop saying that girls are sporty, girls. Jun 18, 2015
- Jun 17, 2015 The next time it rains, don't complain. Do this. Jun 17, 2015
- Jun 16, 2015 Always calling for Mommy, even though she has ignored him almost every time Jun 16, 2015
- Jun 15, 2015 We don't roll down our car windows anymore. What the hell are my children going to do? Jun 15, 2015
- Jun 14, 2015 My son has no faith in me. Jun 14, 2015
- Jun 14, 2015 I'm willing to reboot Lost, absent the stupid parts. Jun 14, 2015
- Jun 13, 2015 No TV since 1990 is no loss Jun 13, 2015
- Jun 12, 2015 Starbucks: Hate the product. Love the company. Jun 12, 2015
- Jun 11, 2015 Innocent enough to believe in "leap-whale" Jun 11, 2015
- Jun 11, 2015 Dear real estate agents: They're just houses. Jun 11, 2015
- Jun 10, 2015 Sometimes the removal of a single piece can change everything Jun 10, 2015
- Jun 9, 2015 The perfect in-law apartment. Or spare room. Or home for your millennial who flunked out of college or can't find a job "in his field." Jun 9, 2015
- Jun 9, 2015 This movie looks great, but I'm sure the book was better Jun 9, 2015
- Jun 8, 2015 Finding common ground with a reasonable, albeit bigoted, pastor Jun 8, 2015
- Jun 7, 2015 This makes no sense to me. You? Jun 7, 2015
- Jun 6, 2015 Goodnight Moon: Supporting drug use and attempted kidnapping Jun 6, 2015
- Jun 6, 2015 The Connecticut Forum: Backstage with the Creators of Serial Jun 6, 2015
- Jun 5, 2015 I was hoping for funny and embarrassing. Instead, I got one of the most amazing videos I have ever seen. Jun 5, 2015
- Jun 4, 2015 The dark, incestuous side of The Brady Bunch, including dog collars and nails Jun 4, 2015
- Jun 4, 2015 Possible (and recommended) bookshelf goal Jun 4, 2015
- Jun 3, 2015 12 Popular Things That I've Never Done Jun 3, 2015
- Jun 2, 2015 Is it really so hard to imagine Jesus supporting same sex marriage? Jun 2, 2015
- Jun 1, 2015 Resolution update: May 2015 Jun 1, 2015
May 2015
- May 31, 2015 The Nazis were evil, but this Disney film is insane May 31, 2015
- May 30, 2015 Ask a Teacher: Do You Teach to the Test? May 30, 2015
- May 30, 2015 I weep for this woman. Her husband is so sweet. And also a monster. May 30, 2015
- May 29, 2015 Bad decision by this teacher, but not for the reasons you might suspect. May 29, 2015
- May 28, 2015 The world lost an elementary school custodian yesterday, and a better man than most. May 28, 2015
- May 27, 2015 Want to be funny? Want to make people laugh? Tell a story. In the right sort of venue. With the right number of people. May 27, 2015
- May 26, 2015 My position on gossip is potentially divisive and possibly offensive, except that I guess it's not. Huzzah! May 26, 2015
- May 25, 2015 My minimalist hero and my possible desire to radically reduce my wardrobe May 25, 2015
- May 24, 2015 Listen to me talk about storytelling and teaching instead of reading my words May 24, 2015
- May 23, 2015 I wore jeans to a $25,000 a table gala and something surprising happened, as it often does when I am under-dressed. May 23, 2015
- May 22, 2015 Wine snobbery debunked. May 22, 2015
- May 21, 2015 My son is an overnight bully. Also, he apparently has superhuman strength. May 21, 2015
- May 20, 2015 I would make the same face if forced to eat avocados May 20, 2015
- May 19, 2015 Why was this second grader drinking a beer, and why did I allow it? May 19, 2015
- May 18, 2015 5 Quick Productivity Tips May 18, 2015
- May 17, 2015 A dance recital freak show, including marital discord, a gangrene foot, and a woman mistaking a children's dance recital for a dance party May 17, 2015
- May 16, 2015 Angry Bear Versus Little Girl: A Haiku May 16, 2015
- May 15, 2015 My daughter got in trouble at school, and I'm so glad. May 15, 2015
- May 14, 2015 Sequel Protection Service: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom May 14, 2015
- May 13, 2015 No photo like this exists of my sister and me. May 13, 2015
- May 12, 2015 The question most frequently asked of me while I sign my name May 12, 2015
- May 11, 2015 A signed copy of Shakespeare's King Lear May 11, 2015
- May 10, 2015 If you have issues with Mother's Day, for whatever reason, please consider these two words or these six words. May 10, 2015
- May 9, 2015 I wonder if Beyonce started this way? May 9, 2015
- May 8, 2015 I have discovered the secret to a happy marriage. Seriously. May 8, 2015
- May 8, 2015 The joyous and much anticipated arrival of the garbage truck May 8, 2015
- May 7, 2015 "I have no gay friends," is perhaps an indicator of one of three things: May 7, 2015
- May 6, 2015 At last! My chance to take the stage with a professional Shakespearean company in a performance of Hamlet. May 6, 2015
- May 6, 2015 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend fans: Look what Mrs. Gosk gave me! May 6, 2015
- May 5, 2015 Not the expression I want to see when someone is looking at my penis. May 5, 2015
- May 4, 2015 My inlaws introduced me to a new concept: Combination babysitting and home improvement services May 4, 2015
- May 3, 2015 Booktopia: The Final Chapter, and the mess that is me. May 3, 2015
- May 3, 2015 The most impressive thing my daughter has ever done May 3, 2015
- May 2, 2015 I won a Moth StorySLAM and made history. May 2, 2015
- May 2, 2015 Bio-breaks must stop now. May 2, 2015
- May 1, 2015 This still exists, and it's so stupid. May 1, 2015
- May 1, 2015 Resolution update: April 2015 May 1, 2015
April 2015
- Apr 30, 2015 The right way for kids to do iPad Apr 30, 2015
- Apr 30, 2015 I was spoiled by sandwich meat. Apr 30, 2015
- Apr 29, 2015 Off the blog reading: Father's Day Crushes Mother's Day and Re-Imagining the Author Talk in 3 Parts Apr 29, 2015
- Apr 29, 2015 Was 1991 as oddly pink and patriotic as this Sizzler video implies? Apr 29, 2015
- Apr 28, 2015 My son is being abused by his sister and he doesn't even know it. Apr 28, 2015
- Apr 28, 2015 Presidential Job Application Question #7 (with my answer): Tell us a joke. Apr 28, 2015
- Apr 27, 2015 Presidential Job Application Question #6 (with my answer): What historical presidential moment tells us the most about your vision of the office? Apr 27, 2015
- Apr 27, 2015 My daughter's position on makeup makes a hell of a lot of sense Apr 27, 2015
- Apr 26, 2015 Do you know how to play Sandwich Man? Apr 26, 2015
- Apr 26, 2015 Presidential Job Application Question #5 (with my answer): What experience have you had that will serve you well as president? Apr 26, 2015
- Apr 25, 2015 Presidential Job Application Question #4 (with my answers): What’s your greatest governing triumph? Apr 25, 2015
- Apr 24, 2015 Presidential Job Application Question #3 (with my answers): What’s your greatest political triumph? Apr 24, 2015
- Apr 23, 2015 Presidential Job Application: Question #2 (with my answer): What's the biggest personal crisis you’ve faced and how did you handle it? Apr 23, 2015
- Apr 22, 2015 The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs: An expletive-laced mention in Library Journal Apr 22, 2015
- Apr 22, 2015 Presidential Job Application Question #1 (with my answer): What’s the biggest crisis you’ve faced in your professional life and how did you handle it? Apr 22, 2015
- Apr 21, 2015 Thought he was sick. Turns out he only wanted some attention. Apr 21, 2015
- Apr 21, 2015 Marco Rubio: You can't claim to be young when your ideas are as old as dirt. Apr 21, 2015
- Apr 20, 2015 What do tanning beds, mustard gas, and arsenic have in common? Apr 20, 2015
- Apr 20, 2015 This was not a temper tantrum. This was Britt McHenry being Britt McHenry. Apr 20, 2015
- Apr 19, 2015 Annoyingly cool Apr 19, 2015
- Apr 18, 2015 This woman wears the same thing to work everyday. You should be as impressed with her as I am. Apr 18, 2015
- Apr 18, 2015 This is why spell-check is my hero. Apr 18, 2015
- Apr 17, 2015 Nice is anything but nice Apr 17, 2015
- Apr 16, 2015 I think there might be something wrong with my daughter. Apr 16, 2015
- Apr 15, 2015 My Professional Best Man career is officially launched Apr 15, 2015
- Apr 14, 2015 Stealing Daddy's headphones Apr 14, 2015
- Apr 14, 2015 3 Reasons Why You Should Never Send a Kid to a Dictionary to Look Up the Spelling of a Word Apr 14, 2015
- Apr 12, 2015 Wedding advice: No impromptu toasts. Apr 12, 2015
- Apr 12, 2015 Potty training in the modern world Apr 12, 2015
- Apr 11, 2015 Dear Adam Cloud: “Yard Goats” is the definition of unique. Also, your argument that the name is offensive is absurd. Apr 11, 2015
- Apr 10, 2015 A note to my children regarding the shame and embarrassment of 2015 Apr 10, 2015
- Apr 9, 2015 Look! I Found the cutest thing that has ever existed on the planet! Apr 9, 2015
- Apr 9, 2015 31 lessons I teach my students that aren’t in the curriculum Apr 9, 2015
- Apr 8, 2015 Three sentences that everyone should say more often Apr 8, 2015
- Apr 8, 2015 I like standing on walls and big rocks, too. Apr 8, 2015
- Apr 7, 2015 “Spring is here!” roars these tiny, purple flowers. Apr 7, 2015
- Apr 7, 2015 I want to be Jimmy Fallon Apr 7, 2015
- Apr 6, 2015 Changes to this website and blog are coming. Thoughts? Apr 6, 2015
- Apr 6, 2015 Legitimate complaints about the toilet Apr 6, 2015
- Apr 5, 2015 11 thoughts on yesterday’s TEDxBU event, including observations from the restrooms and my advice for future TED speakers. Apr 5, 2015
- Apr 5, 2015 Future CTfastrak spokespersons Apr 5, 2015
- Apr 4, 2015 It’s a shame when people pose as Christians and give Jesus a bad name. Apr 4, 2015
- Apr 3, 2015 One is the loneliest number, even if you’re an American Girl doll. Apr 3, 2015
- Apr 2, 2015 Ladies: Leave my choice of winter clothing alone. I’M FINE. Apr 2, 2015
- Apr 1, 2015 Little routines by little people that mean so much to me for reasons I can’t explain. Apr 1, 2015
- Apr 1, 2015 Resolution update: March 2015 Apr 1, 2015
March 2015
- Mar 31, 2015 If the teacher tells you that your child is not gifted, it’s more likely that it’s the teacher who is not gifted. Mar 31, 2015
- Mar 29, 2015 Students were required to listen to Ted Cruz - under threat of fines - which seems just plain mean. Also agonizing. Mar 29, 2015
- Mar 29, 2015 14 Things That Annoy Me (and probably you) Mar 29, 2015
- Mar 28, 2015 The two reasons that people like foods that they initially despise are exactly the two reasons that I still don’t like those foods. Mar 28, 2015
- Mar 27, 2015 I want this life. Mar 27, 2015
- Mar 26, 2015 The author Julian Barnes would kill me, and defacing books is a terrible thing, but don’t you think this is also an AMAZING idea? Mar 26, 2015
- Mar 26, 2015 My son’s excitement over a recent visit to the mall is slightly disconcerting Mar 26, 2015
- Mar 25, 2015 Teachers of writing at any level: Read this immediately. Nothing is more important. Mar 25, 2015
- Mar 24, 2015 I don’t know Kathleen Hampton, but based upon her lawsuit, I suspect that ‘entitled and insufferable” are likely descriptors. Mar 24, 2015
- Mar 22, 2015 Is Ted Cruz really this stupid or is he simply pandering to idiots? Mar 22, 2015
- Mar 22, 2015 Everyone deserves to have fans. Mar 22, 2015
- Mar 22, 2015 The consistently late are the scum of the Earth. Here’s a simple strategy to avoid being late in the future. Mar 22, 2015
- Mar 22, 2015 This is what happens after you behave well during your doctor’s appointment Mar 22, 2015
- Mar 21, 2015 The Joyful and Effective Use of Condoms in the Latter Years of Life: My latest workshop Mar 21, 2015
- Mar 20, 2015 A brilliant way to turn incessant texting into something splendid and amusing Mar 20, 2015
- Mar 19, 2015 Today I feel like a real author – which doesn’t happen often – and not for any reason that you might imagine. Mar 19, 2015
- Mar 18, 2015 This is the real reason you go shopping before a snowstorm Mar 18, 2015
- Mar 17, 2015 Malcolm Gladwell on shorter attention spans, inherent unfairness, and the selfie. Mar 17, 2015
- Mar 16, 2015 The single greatest death bed regret of Generation X (and maybe beyond) will be this: Mar 16, 2015
- Mar 15, 2015 I didn’t respond to a stranger’s unsolicited manuscript for 48 hours, so his angry response was probably justified. Right? Mar 15, 2015
- Mar 14, 2015 Sequel Protection Service: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (The Millennium) series Mar 14, 2015
- Mar 13, 2015 A student wrote something that made me cry while reading it aloud. And thanks to the rules of my “Make your teacher cry” contest, my tears were caught on video. Mar 13, 2015
- Mar 12, 2015 Outdoors at last! Mar 12, 2015
- Mar 11, 2015 23 jobs I seriously considered at one point in my life (and still do with a few exceptions) Mar 11, 2015
- Mar 10, 2015 Why do I blog? Because it’s nearly led to national television, and it still might. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Mar 10, 2015
- Mar 9, 2015 12 Things Teachers Wish They Could Say to Parents Mar 9, 2015
- Mar 8, 2015 One of those moments when I’m happy that I’m over 40 years old. Mar 8, 2015
- Mar 8, 2015 50 Healthiest Foods of All Time: A large percentage are a mystery to me. Mar 8, 2015
- Mar 7, 2015 19 things I heart right now Mar 7, 2015
- Mar 6, 2015 A replica guillotine in the middle of a children’s museum? Mar 6, 2015
- Mar 5, 2015 COVER REVEAL: The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs Mar 5, 2015
- Mar 5, 2015 I am so proud and excited about the world in which my children are growing up. Mar 5, 2015
- Mar 4, 2015 Curt Shilling is wrong about evolution, but his response to Internet trolls was commendable and enough to make this Yankees fan cheer. Mar 4, 2015
- Mar 3, 2015 Nine rules for making you more efficient with email and less of a jerk face Mar 3, 2015
- Mar 2, 2015 Less lecture. More learning. Mar 2, 2015
- Mar 2, 2015 Mike Huckabee is a bigot still living in 1996 Mar 2, 2015
- Mar 1, 2015 The McRib is super healthy and nothing like a yoga mat Mar 1, 2015
February 2015
- Feb 28, 2015 Resolution update: February Feb 28, 2015
- Feb 28, 2015 Cat Heaven snuck up on me and made me cry. Feb 28, 2015
- Feb 27, 2015 I’ve found the next, great cereal spokesperson Feb 27, 2015
- Feb 27, 2015 One of these words is not like the others Feb 27, 2015
- Feb 26, 2015 Friendship Application 3.0 Feb 26, 2015
- Feb 25, 2015 I won’t be reading my novel to my children. For a damn good reason. Feb 25, 2015
- Feb 24, 2015 I have illogical affection for this. Feb 24, 2015
- Feb 24, 2015 5 questions about the third line of James Taylor “Fire and Rain,” which will likely plague me until the end of days. Feb 24, 2015
- Feb 23, 2015 Four things to consider before dating a coworker: An office romance with my future wife. Feb 23, 2015
- Feb 23, 2015 Emergency and Evacuation Plan maps should not be designed to produce panic Feb 23, 2015
- Feb 22, 2015 You’re allowed to sound this bad when you’re this cute. Feb 22, 2015
- Feb 21, 2015 If you want to deny homosexuals the same rights as heterosexuals, you are evil. Feb 21, 2015
- Feb 20, 2015 Just when you think that the boy is being dragged around by the girl, he asks the question that breaks my heart. Feb 20, 2015
- Feb 20, 2015 Stephen Fry explains what he would say if he was “confronted by God” and nearly knocks the interviewer out of his seat. Feb 20, 2015
- Feb 19, 2015 This is not a telephone, so how does my son know that this was once a telephone? Feb 19, 2015
- Feb 18, 2015 It’s easy to criticize what people do. It’s often what people don’t do that matters more, yet these inactions are often ignored. So leave me alone, you inactive, moronic toadstools. Feb 18, 2015
- Feb 17, 2015 13 thoughts upon seeing my son trying to be cooler than me. Feb 17, 2015
- Feb 15, 2015 My daughter wished me luck before my most recent Moth GrandSLAM performance then promptly retracted it. Feb 15, 2015
- Feb 15, 2015 The fallacy of private criticism and the mistake teachers often make when assigning consequences Feb 15, 2015
- Feb 14, 2015 Novelist Jose Saramago quit writing in 1953. Part of me wants to reach back in time and hug him. The other part wants to smack him. Feb 14, 2015
- Feb 13, 2015 The blend of happiness and sadness, pride and envy of the working day is easy on some days. Impossibly hard on others. Also, my son needs to get himself a job. Feb 13, 2015
- Feb 13, 2015 It took this couple 8 years to say “I love you” to each other. It took my wife slightly less time to say it to me. Feb 13, 2015
- Feb 12, 2015 In the unlikely event that my books, films, and musicals don’t make me a wealthy man, I have a back-up plan more than 350 people strong. Feb 12, 2015
- Feb 11, 2015 There is no female counterpart to the word “guys,” and that is a tragedy. Feb 11, 2015
- Feb 11, 2015 In the words of Budo… Feb 11, 2015
- Feb 10, 2015 Best compliment of my life Feb 10, 2015
- Feb 9, 2015 Clara’s sixth birthday. Make it stop. Feb 9, 2015
- Feb 9, 2015 Death bed regrets revisited: 2015 Feb 9, 2015
- Feb 8, 2015 Poetry memorization need not be boring or a waste of time. I have used it to make a woman swoon (possibly) and enact one of my greatest pranks of all time against a fellow teacher. Feb 8, 2015
- Feb 8, 2015 Not nearly the late bloomer that his Daddy was Feb 8, 2015
- Feb 7, 2015 The moment for which every author longs, experienced by my wife. Feb 7, 2015
- Feb 7, 2015 Sleeping with goats on The Gist Feb 7, 2015
- Feb 6, 2015 What’s the word for this feeling? Feb 6, 2015
- Feb 5, 2015 My daughter is failing to follow in her father’s footsteps, and I am both thrilled and mystified. Feb 5, 2015
- Feb 4, 2015 The tragedy of the philtrum: Join me in elevating it to its proper status in the American lexicon. Feb 4, 2015
- Feb 3, 2015 Business Insider lists 9 unfair advantages that help people get ahead. I’ve benefited from 5. Physical attractiveness is not one of them. Feb 3, 2015
- Feb 2, 2015 My wife’s text message in the closing seconds of the Super Bowl said it all. Feb 2, 2015
January 2015
- Jan 31, 2015 One of the best nights of my life Jan 31, 2015
- Jan 31, 2015 How to come off as an insecure douchebag Jan 31, 2015
- Jan 31, 2015 Ugly people unite! Sometimes beauty can only be found in numbers. Jan 31, 2015
- Jan 30, 2015 It’s your booger. Jan 30, 2015
- Jan 30, 2015 Resolution update: January 2015 Jan 30, 2015
- Jan 29, 2015 Speak Up is two years old! It began with a snow day and a simple question to my wife. Jan 29, 2015
- Jan 28, 2015 Elsa just wants to blow me. Jan 28, 2015
- Jan 27, 2015 Wanted: Photographs of sofas and slippers and well appointed thermostats. Please? Jan 27, 2015
- Jan 27, 2015 This guy is too damn young to be teaching. Jan 27, 2015
- Jan 26, 2015 Two important things to remember as the Blizzard of 2015 approaches Jan 26, 2015
- Jan 26, 2015 30 lessons learned from six years of parenting Jan 26, 2015
- Jan 26, 2015 Storytelling on The Gist Jan 26, 2015
- Jan 25, 2015 Slate might actually be stealing my ideas. Not really, but you have to admit that it’s getting a little suspicious. Jan 25, 2015
- Jan 24, 2015 The mindset of the person who affixes those stick figure family decals to the rear window of their car mystifies me. Jan 24, 2015
- Jan 24, 2015 Love my readers Jan 24, 2015
- Jan 23, 2015 My aunts and uncles were once young and strong and infinite. This is how I try to remember them even when the shadows of my ongoing existential crisis creep in. Jan 23, 2015
- Jan 22, 2015 This is how I survive meetings. Jan 22, 2015
- Jan 21, 2015 My friends are incredibly odd. Complete outliers. I couldn’t be more happy. Jan 21, 2015
- Jan 20, 2015 How I teach storytelling Jan 20, 2015
- Jan 20, 2015 I think my wife married me to compensate for her lack of a sense of direction. Jan 20, 2015
- Jan 19, 2015 The best moment that I have ever spent at a football game. Maybe one of the best moments of my life. And it happened during a timeout. Jan 19, 2015
- Jan 18, 2015 When do you allow your child to quit an activity? Also, entering into contractual agreements with your child is insane. Jan 18, 2015
- Jan 18, 2015 A new definition for enthusiasm Jan 18, 2015
- Jan 17, 2015 So much wrong with this photograph Jan 17, 2015
- Jan 16, 2015 A perfect combination of glitter, revenge, and the US Postal Service: My kind of company Jan 16, 2015
- Jan 15, 2015 Productivity tip #14: Start your day ahead of everyone else. Jan 15, 2015
- Jan 15, 2015 Mystery behind this photograph solved, though the solution was fairly obvious. Jan 15, 2015
- Jan 14, 2015 The Kindle’s beta version, perhaps? Jan 14, 2015
- Jan 13, 2015 There’s nothing better than a little fire in your belly to keep you moving forward. Find something to hate. Jan 13, 2015
- Jan 13, 2015 Insult advertising is the best Jan 13, 2015
- Jan 12, 2015 Your future self wants you to be daring and adventurous. Don’t let the current version of yourself screw things up because it’s cold. Jan 12, 2015
- Jan 12, 2015 My Story of the Day exercise will change your life. I promise. And you'll find a bunch of stories in the process. Jan 12, 2015
- Jan 11, 2015 Productivity tip #13: Own one belt. Jan 11, 2015
- Jan 10, 2015 Someone at Slate magazine has been reading my blog and stealing my brilliant ideas. Seriously. Sort of. Jan 10, 2015
- Jan 10, 2015 My students chose mustard covered bees. Jan 10, 2015
- Jan 9, 2015 Verbal sparring 101: Comparing apples and oranges makes a whole lot of sense. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Jan 9, 2015
- Jan 8, 2015 Taylor Swift teaches a valuable lesson to all content creators. Jan 8, 2015
- Jan 7, 2015 The prize for my latest writing contest is the threat of tears and possible humiliation. No wonder my students are writing up a storm. Jan 7, 2015
- Jan 6, 2015 The Professional Best Man: A bride’s best friend, too. Jan 6, 2015
- Jan 5, 2015 Stupid people think they’re smart, and smart people think they’re not. Most important: They can’t help it. This explains everything. Jan 5, 2015
- Jan 4, 2015 Productivity tip #12: Embrace the imperfect. Jan 4, 2015
- Jan 3, 2015 The Play-Doh sex toy was a mistake, but making a big deal out of it is much worse. Jan 3, 2015
- Jan 1, 2015 A New Year’s resolution for all experienced parents: Silence the small, sad and stupid. Allow expecting parents to be expectant. Jan 1, 2015
- Jan 1, 2015 New Year's resolutions: 2015 Jan 1, 2015
December 2014
- Dec 31, 2014 Resolution update: 2014 in review Dec 31, 2014
- Dec 31, 2014 My highly improbable weekend Dec 31, 2014
- Dec 30, 2014 I want to be overpaid. Dec 30, 2014
- Dec 30, 2014 Best Christmas gift ever. Someone strongly hint about this to my kids when they are old enough to understand. Dec 30, 2014
- Dec 29, 2014 Useless skills: Speaking and listening simultaneously Dec 29, 2014
- Dec 28, 2014 How did television meteorologists become household names, and why can’t I name a single one of these guys? Dec 28, 2014
- Dec 27, 2014 New Year’s resolutions work. Goal setting can change your life. Maybe not for losers, but you are not a loser. Don’t let the pundits tell you otherwise. Dec 27, 2014
- Dec 26, 2014 My 2014 Christmas haul Dec 26, 2014
- Dec 26, 2014 The cat peed and pooped and vomited on our Christmas preparations, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Dec 26, 2014
- Dec 25, 2014 My daughter’s grandmother is sadly more Susan than grandmother Dec 25, 2014
- Dec 24, 2014 Storyteller Interruptus Dec 24, 2014
- Dec 23, 2014 Turns out that I’m quite the catch Dec 23, 2014
- Dec 22, 2014 Another reason why I want a time machine Dec 22, 2014
- Dec 22, 2014 If Newington, Connecticut ever wants a new slogan, it has many options, including a serial killer and a lot of coffee. Dec 22, 2014
- Dec 21, 2014 “I checked his tushy and there was no poop anywhere.” Dec 21, 2014
- Dec 21, 2014 Why it’s glorious to be a Patriots fan Dec 21, 2014
- Dec 20, 2014 Seasons Magazine: My latest column on how real men don’t use snow blowers Dec 20, 2014
- Dec 20, 2014 The girl rejected her mother’s culinary advances, but the boy could not resist Dec 20, 2014
- Dec 19, 2014 Everyone is completely overwhelmed, except I kind of think that they aren’t and should reconsider their position. Dec 19, 2014
- Dec 19, 2014 I guess I really, really, really love my wife. Dec 19, 2014
- Dec 18, 2014 Santa Claus spent the day at an abomination of a grocery store, and he was BRILLIANT. Dec 18, 2014
- Dec 17, 2014 Michael Lewis wants women to rule Wall Street. I would like to take his thesis about a million steps further. Dec 17, 2014
- Dec 17, 2014 Another demanded apology that will likely go unanswered and is pathetic and stupid either way. Dec 17, 2014
- Dec 16, 2014 Just when I start to become a cynical, entitled, unappreciative jerk face, Jenny Slate comes along and sets me straight. Dec 16, 2014
- Dec 15, 2014 An elementary school teacher’s recollections from the day of the Newtown tragedy Dec 15, 2014
- Dec 15, 2014 Who ever said that domestic violence and sexual assault are hard subjects to talk about? What’s the deal, NFL? Dec 15, 2014
- Dec 14, 2014 Charlie found a whistle. And he was happy. Dec 14, 2014
- Dec 14, 2014 Arrogance may be the perfect replacement to an extra hour or two of sleep Dec 14, 2014
- Dec 13, 2014 I’m going to disagree with “I’m going to push back on that a little.” Dec 13, 2014
- Dec 12, 2014 Life is good when you’re two years-old Dec 12, 2014
- Dec 12, 2014 Kolf: Golf played on ice. And yes, we're going to play it. Dec 12, 2014
- Dec 11, 2014 The Boy Scouts encourages rank advancement by making the first three ranks embarrassing and pathetic. Dec 11, 2014
- Dec 10, 2014 Pineapples once were popular party accessories. And not for eating. Dec 10, 2014
- Dec 10, 2014 My friends are dullards by comparison. Dec 10, 2014
- Dec 10, 2014 Tiny windows hurt my heart. Dec 10, 2014
- Dec 9, 2014 I have 15 jobs. So you probably require my services in one way or another. Dec 9, 2014
- Dec 9, 2014 Cruelty is a sign of true friendship Dec 9, 2014
- Dec 8, 2014 My 15 dead friends (potentially) Dec 8, 2014
- Dec 8, 2014 These 8 minutes of amateur video are better than any show on television. Dec 8, 2014
- Dec 7, 2014 The best way to stop a novelist dead in his tracks Dec 7, 2014
- Dec 7, 2014 Good news and not bad news regarding my idea for an MRI boutique Dec 7, 2014
- Dec 5, 2014 Three ideas to increase profitability at ESPN Dec 5, 2014
- Dec 5, 2014 He’ll never have it this good again. Dec 5, 2014
- Dec 5, 2014 The St. Louis Police Officers Association have demanded an apology, which unfortunately has made them look like middle school brats. Dec 5, 2014
- Dec 4, 2014 Presentation consultant for hire Dec 4, 2014
- Dec 3, 2014 Outsourcing and crowdsourcing my New Year’s resolutions: Any suggestions for me? Dec 3, 2014
- Dec 3, 2014 The lack of sibling rivalry is my daughter's crowning achievement. Dec 3, 2014
- Dec 2, 2014 Our little ingrate has grown up. Unfortunately. Dec 2, 2014
- Dec 1, 2014 Resolution update: November 2014 Dec 1, 2014
November 2014
- Nov 30, 2014 Apples are possibly the least relevant part of apple picking Nov 30, 2014
- Nov 30, 2014 My 1992-1994 culture gap: Two years without television, movies, or music Nov 30, 2014
- Nov 29, 2014 I was once a bank teller, waiting on Mark Wahlberg, writing sonnets, and battling my idiot manager. Nov 29, 2014
- Nov 28, 2014 The stuff of my wife’s childhood is alive and well in the hands of our children, and I’m so jealous. Nov 28, 2014
- Nov 28, 2014 A Christmas Story, brought to life through animatronics and a lot of love Nov 28, 2014
- Nov 27, 2014 One more thing to be thankful for on this Thanksgiving Day Nov 27, 2014
- Nov 27, 2014 Canned, jellied cranberry sauce will not go the way of the dodo (or the Twinkie) if I have anything to say about it. Nov 27, 2014
- Nov 27, 2014 18 reasons for me to be thankful on Thanksgiving 2014 Nov 27, 2014
- Nov 26, 2014 The MRI boutique: My next great business idea. Who wants to be my first investor? Nov 26, 2014
- Nov 26, 2014 Cooler than his father ever was or will be Nov 26, 2014
- Nov 25, 2014 The 8 lowest forms of human communication (2014 update) Nov 25, 2014
- Nov 25, 2014 Coincidence? I don’t think so. Nov 25, 2014
- Nov 24, 2014 Interstellar should be a TV show Nov 24, 2014
- Nov 24, 2014 High school students wrote and produced raps based upon one of my books Nov 24, 2014
- Nov 23, 2014 Bread bags on your feet was apparently a thing. Not just my family’s desperate attempt to keep our feet dry in the snow. Nov 23, 2014
- Nov 23, 2014 Budo loves Max Nov 23, 2014
- Nov 22, 2014 I went to the movies and met an amazing young woman and a loud-mouthed racist. Nov 22, 2014
- Nov 22, 2014 Farmer Charlie Nov 22, 2014
- Nov 21, 2014 One of my fictional characters has found his way into math class Nov 21, 2014
- Nov 20, 2014 How much would you pay for one more hour in your day. Hint: There is a correct answer, and most Americans got it wrong. Nov 20, 2014
- Nov 19, 2014 BJ Novak’s new children’s book is annoyingly brilliant, just like everything else he does annoyingly well. Nov 19, 2014
- Nov 18, 2014 Adult sized Underoos might be even better than a sexy Princess Leia costume. Nov 18, 2014
- Nov 18, 2014 A simple declaration and a smidgen of self confidence can launch a business and change your life. Just look at my mother-in-law. Nov 18, 2014
- Nov 17, 2014 3 most important rules of the thank you note Nov 17, 2014
- Nov 17, 2014 My father rode horses all his life. I rode horses until they were taken away. Watching my kids ride horses, even for a day, was magical. Nov 17, 2014
- Nov 16, 2014 Perhaps I have more in common with the Matthew Dicks of Des Moines, Iowa than just our names and our mug shots Nov 16, 2014
- Nov 15, 2014 Sometimes I think that my daughter is already cooler than I will ever be. Nov 15, 2014
- Nov 15, 2014 New word: Truché Nov 15, 2014
- Nov 14, 2014 I have a lot of stories to tell. More than you could ever imagine. I suspect that Bill Murray would understand why. Nov 14, 2014
- Nov 13, 2014 My possibly petulant “I told you so” climate change Kickstarter idea: I need your feedback. Am I an idiot? Nov 13, 2014
- Nov 13, 2014 My Daddy gnaws on raw pumpkin. Nov 13, 2014
- Nov 12, 2014 I was once homeless, living in my 1992 Toyota Tercel. But that still seemed spacious compared to this apartment. Nov 12, 2014
- Nov 11, 2014 Seriously badass porcupine Nov 11, 2014
- Nov 11, 2014 She can find her own bed, and it hurt. Nov 11, 2014
- Nov 10, 2014 Christmas seems to have arrived early this year, and shut the hell up. Nov 10, 2014
- Nov 10, 2014 “I’m not a scientist” is a perfectly acceptable response to climate change questions, as long as you’re willing to acknowledge everything else that you are not. Nov 10, 2014
- Nov 9, 2014 The McRib is back. It’s delicious. And there’s nothing wrong with it, you closed-minded, pretentious food snobs. Nov 9, 2014
- Nov 8, 2014 I want to be asked more rhetorical questions Nov 8, 2014
- Nov 8, 2014 I never realized how truly disturbing the opening sequences to 1980’s TV shows were until now. Nov 8, 2014
- Nov 7, 2014 No technology is a great way to teach. Also, PowerPoint is more than two decades old. It doesn’t count as technology anymore. Nov 7, 2014
- Nov 7, 2014 My son doesn’t give a damn about my deadlines. Nov 7, 2014
- Nov 6, 2014 It would be amazing if my daughter became a firefighter when she grew up. My wife may disagree slightly. Nov 6, 2014
- Nov 6, 2014 Hunter Thompson once retyped The Great Gatsby just to feel what it was like to write a great novel. What a stupid waste of time. Nov 6, 2014
- Nov 5, 2014 How I Function on Less Than 6 Hours of Sleep (and how you could, too) Nov 5, 2014
- Nov 5, 2014 No electricity. No touch screen. No Internet connection. Just centrifugal force and joy. Nov 5, 2014
- Nov 4, 2014 Still in love Nov 4, 2014
- Nov 3, 2014 A bungled MVP presentation demonstrates a truth about storytelling. Also, I’m available for hire, Chevy. And you need me. Desperately. Nov 3, 2014
- Nov 3, 2014 My son wants attention. Just not from me. And it’s starting to hurt a little. Nov 3, 2014
- Nov 2, 2014 The vastly underutilized “You told me so.” Nov 2, 2014
- Nov 2, 2014 The two days that I will not miss my children and pets one bit Nov 2, 2014
- Nov 1, 2014 He can sing the Clean Up song. Does this mean he might actually learn to clean up someday? Nov 1, 2014
- Nov 1, 2014 Resolution update: October 2014 Nov 1, 2014
October 2014
- Oct 31, 2014 Halloween has meant many different things to me depending upon the year. Have your Halloweens followed a similar trajectory? Oct 31, 2014
- Oct 31, 2014 People will still try to destroy you. Oct 31, 2014
- Oct 30, 2014 Who is watching these political ads? Oct 30, 2014
- Oct 30, 2014 Our little yoga clocks Oct 30, 2014
- Oct 29, 2014 11 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was 20 Oct 29, 2014
- Oct 28, 2014 Today will be one of the hardest days of parenting so far. I know I’m lucky in this respect, but there is still a hole in my heart. Oct 28, 2014
- Oct 27, 2014 Don’t say goodbye to the bride and groom. Just leave. Let it be your final gift to them. Oct 27, 2014
- Oct 27, 2014 I began the day as a depressed and angry idiot. I ended the day with laughter and rainbows and sunshine. Literally. The lesson: Don’t give up hope. Oct 27, 2014
- Oct 26, 2014 My son cracked his head open with a lamp. My wife’s reaction to his head wound was unusual but surprisingly typical. Oct 26, 2014
- Oct 25, 2014 My new startup idea: Rate My Parents Oct 25, 2014
- Oct 25, 2014 The boy loves his yoga Oct 25, 2014
- Oct 24, 2014 Something is funny Oct 24, 2014
- Oct 23, 2014 Why does this photo make me so sad? Oct 23, 2014
- Oct 22, 2014 I wonder this all the time. Oct 22, 2014
- Oct 21, 2014 Hack a friend’s Facebook profile. Have fun and do some good all at the same time. Oct 21, 2014
- Oct 21, 2014 Hot Buzz About Books and Book Clubs Oct 21, 2014
- Oct 20, 2014 Conscientiousness is the most important trait. This may explain how I manage to overcome the absence of so many others. Oct 20, 2014
- Oct 19, 2014 Favorite girls Oct 19, 2014
- Oct 18, 2014 Death helps. Steve Jobs knew this, and unlike me, he didn’t need to die in order to learn it. Oct 18, 2014
- Oct 17, 2014 My kids love each other so much, and you can shut your mouth about it. Oct 17, 2014
- Oct 16, 2014 The difference between playing school and teaching school Oct 16, 2014
- Oct 15, 2014 A race to the bottom: Which state will be the last to legalize same sex marriage? Oct 15, 2014
- Oct 14, 2014 Teachers: Stop commenting, positively or negatively, on your student’s physical appearance. It’s only hurting them. Oct 14, 2014
- Oct 14, 2014 Hemingway was an idiot. Write sober. Oct 14, 2014
- Oct 13, 2014 John Steinbeck was an unrealistically and obscenely mature man Oct 13, 2014
- Oct 13, 2014 The Mystery of Prince Rupert’s Drop: A small piece of glass made amazing Oct 13, 2014
- Oct 12, 2014 Productivity tip #11: What "I didn't have enough time" really means. Oct 12, 2014
- Oct 11, 2014 “Guess what?” You sound like an idiot when you say “Guess what?” Oct 11, 2014
- Oct 11, 2014 Learning to be a grandfather from the best Oct 11, 2014
- Oct 10, 2014 Funnier than some big budget comedies Oct 10, 2014
- Oct 9, 2014 How I establish the rules of my classroom Oct 9, 2014
- Oct 9, 2014 I hope they remember this moment when they want to kill each other. Oct 9, 2014
- Oct 8, 2014 Saturday morning cartoons are no more. A sad day for someone whose 27 year friendship may have been predicated on a Saturday morning cartoon theme song. Oct 8, 2014
- Oct 8, 2014 There can only be one explanation for a Republican campaign ad as sexist and stupid as this. Oct 8, 2014
- Oct 7, 2014 Is it wrong for me to find this Wallkill Mighty Mites clip nearly as entertaining as the Patriots victory over the Bengals? Oct 7, 2014
- Oct 7, 2014 Hot Buzz About Books and Book Clubs Oct 7, 2014
- Oct 6, 2014 No one wants to see your photos of the sunrise or the sunset. Oct 6, 2014
- Oct 6, 2014 Let’s put an end to the Miss America pageant by making anyone who watches it feel small and stupid and uninformed. Oct 6, 2014
- Oct 5, 2014 I have never used an em dash. I don’t even know how to make an em dash. But you can still find them in my books. Oct 5, 2014
- Oct 5, 2014 Beautiful wife. Scolded boy. Molded in plastic. Oct 5, 2014
- Oct 4, 2014 This is what happens when you work in the industry for 17 years. Oct 4, 2014
- Oct 4, 2014 A man shouted at me. Swore at me. My response was not appropriate. Unfortunately. Oct 4, 2014
- Oct 4, 2014 Daddy is dumb. Mommy is a genius. Oct 4, 2014
- Oct 3, 2014 This short film presents a situation that is both ridiculous and reality. And that scares the hell out of me. Oct 3, 2014
- Oct 2, 2014 My story was featured on The Moth’s podcast this week. I still get goose bumps. Oct 2, 2014
- Oct 2, 2014 Clara's September bus stop outfits Oct 2, 2014
- Oct 1, 2014 While my son was joyously climbing aboard fire engines and tractors, my daughter and I were engulfed in tragedy and heartache. Oct 1, 2014
- Oct 1, 2014 Resolution update: September 2014 Oct 1, 2014
September 2014
- Sep 30, 2014 Unacceptable platitude #7: “Fair does not mean equal.” Sep 30, 2014
- Sep 29, 2014 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2014 Sep 29, 2014
- Sep 28, 2014 Stupid yoga may be turning my son into a dweeb. Or perhaps he’s trying to get the attention of women like his father once did. Sep 28, 2014
- Sep 27, 2014 Office space turned dance hall, yoga studio, lunch room hell. I bet they’re all organic, gluten-free, transcendentalist vegans, too. Sep 27, 2014
- Sep 26, 2014 My five year-old daughter has discovered the BEST COMEBACK EVER Sep 26, 2014
- Sep 26, 2014 September 26, 1983: The day a Soviet colonel and forgotten hero saved the world from nuclear destruction. Sep 26, 2014
- Sep 25, 2014 Poop is here. Sep 25, 2014
- Sep 25, 2014 ESPN makes the same stupid mistake that they criticized NFL commissioner Roger Goodell for two months ago. Sep 25, 2014
- Sep 24, 2014 My annual plea to the girls in my fifth grade class: Maintain your advantage over the boys. Rule the world. Sep 24, 2014
- Sep 23, 2014 My daughter received her first library card. Her father might be more excited about it than she is, and for good reason. Sep 23, 2014
- Sep 22, 2014 I have a simple, inexpensive, highly effective means of improving learning for all students: Make things fun. Sep 22, 2014
- Sep 21, 2014 This author found a way to sell books with sticks and leaves and a little bit of twine. Sep 21, 2014
- Sep 21, 2014 Our unusually dark and strange family lullaby Sep 21, 2014
- Sep 20, 2014 The Grecian Bend was stupid, but no. Heels are still stupider. Sep 20, 2014
- Sep 19, 2014 There was a dead man in our hotel room. Sep 19, 2014
- Sep 18, 2014 Star Wars is nothing without the music Sep 18, 2014
- Sep 17, 2014 Purposeful procrastination: Are slightly lower grades really all that bad? Sep 17, 2014
- Sep 16, 2014 The tyranny of the syllabus Sep 16, 2014
- Sep 16, 2014 My children visited a bookstore on the last day of summer. Their behavior was shocking. Sep 16, 2014
- Sep 15, 2014 My best piece of parenting advice Sep 15, 2014
- Sep 15, 2014 Just like his mom. And his dad, actually. Sep 15, 2014
- Sep 14, 2014 If I was able to choose my children’s teachers, this is what I would want more than anything else. Sep 14, 2014
- Sep 14, 2014 When you choose the name Moxie Marlinspike, you have to expect people to ask about the name. Just answer the question. Sep 14, 2014
- Sep 13, 2014 Men are far more likely to make stupid decisions in sports. But are the reasons for this stupidity all bad? I don’t think so. Sep 13, 2014
- Sep 13, 2014 The range of emotions at the bus stop on Friday was astounding. Sep 13, 2014
- Sep 12, 2014 At last I have a plan for old age Sep 12, 2014
- Sep 11, 2014 The Moth: Secret Bedroom Move Sep 11, 2014
- Sep 11, 2014 Bathtub interloper Sep 11, 2014
- Sep 10, 2014 PowerPoint presentations, game shows, skinny dipping, and now The Oscars: Quirks of the many book clubs I have attended Sep 10, 2014
- Sep 9, 2014 Charlie! Sep 9, 2014
- Sep 9, 2014 Priceless moments at an ATM Sep 9, 2014
- Sep 8, 2014 The dark is coming. Sep 8, 2014
- Sep 8, 2014 Little old ladies on a plane Sep 8, 2014
- Sep 7, 2014 Anything but a banana Sep 7, 2014
- Sep 7, 2014 Czech edition of Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend Sep 7, 2014
- Sep 6, 2014 Stupid nostalgia Sep 6, 2014
- Sep 6, 2014 Yesterday’s bus stop goodbye Sep 6, 2014
- Sep 5, 2014 Her possible rejection of the manicure might be her best decision yet. Sep 5, 2014
- Sep 5, 2014 The Moth: The Cardboard Knight Sep 5, 2014
- Sep 4, 2014 We bought an IKEA step stool. Thanks to the directions, we know not to look closely at it. Sep 4, 2014
- Sep 4, 2014 The truth is sometimes truly better than fiction. This is just such a case. Sep 4, 2014
- Sep 3, 2014 One of the greatest sources of disagreement in my marriage centers on Kevin Bacon and a questionable dance number. Sep 3, 2014
- Sep 3, 2014 My daughter’s bus stop is completely ridiculous, and I so wish I could be there. Sep 3, 2014
- Sep 2, 2014 The Moth: No Santa Sep 2, 2014
- Sep 1, 2014 Not so internal dialogue Sep 1, 2014
- Sep 1, 2014 Resolution update: August 2014 Sep 1, 2014
August 2014
- Aug 31, 2014 Economy of blessings is paramount to my son. Either that or he’s already rejecting religion. Aug 31, 2014
- Aug 31, 2014 Most threatening (and perhaps effective) example of signage ever Aug 31, 2014
- Aug 30, 2014 This is real, despite all my instincts telling me otherwise. Aug 30, 2014
- Aug 29, 2014 Men humiliate men. Constantly. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Aug 29, 2014
- Aug 29, 2014 Saddest photos ever taken Aug 29, 2014
- Aug 28, 2014 Open a toy. Record. Make a fortune. Aug 28, 2014
- Aug 28, 2014 I went to Maine to officiate a wedding for a couple I had never met, and it wasn’t crazy. Aug 28, 2014
- Aug 27, 2014 The Louisiana Literacy Test of 1963 is astonishing. Impossibly difficult and truly evil. I think I’ll give it to my students. Aug 27, 2014
- Aug 27, 2014 A perfect visual representation of how I feel about my daughter’s first day of kindergarten Aug 27, 2014
- Aug 27, 2014 Speak Up: Storytelling Workshop launching Aug 27, 2014
- Aug 26, 2014 My maybe-girlfriend asked if we could watch The Simpsons. I knew I had found a wife. Aug 26, 2014
- Aug 26, 2014 My kindergartener Aug 26, 2014
- Aug 25, 2014 My daughter is making new friends for me Aug 25, 2014
- Aug 25, 2014 Perfect cure for the first day of school blues Aug 25, 2014
- Aug 24, 2014 Why does writing instruction so often suck? Aug 24, 2014
- Aug 23, 2014 There is nothing wrong with a married couple sleeping in separate beds. There’s something very wrong with allowing society to stop you from doing so. Aug 23, 2014
- Aug 22, 2014 Love the book. Hate the fact that it only took Bradbury 18 days to write it. Aug 22, 2014
- Aug 21, 2014 Advice for teachers about to embark on another school year: Stay out of the classroom Aug 21, 2014
- Aug 20, 2014 Boyhood made all the difference for me. Aug 20, 2014
- Aug 20, 2014 Can you imagine a better way to start the day? Aug 20, 2014
- Aug 19, 2014 What is the best way to invest one dollar? Aug 19, 2014
- Aug 19, 2014 My book club once featured skinny dipping. This book club has a big time college football player for a member. I think they win. Aug 19, 2014
- Aug 18, 2014 Stuff I don’t know: Flowers Aug 18, 2014
- Aug 17, 2014 Happy boy Aug 17, 2014
- Aug 17, 2014 Plants are smarter than we ever imagined. Eating them is no less cruel than eating a cow. And cows taste better. Aug 17, 2014
- Aug 16, 2014 She’s worried about her husband’s diapers. She should be more worried about her child’s early morning routine. Aug 16, 2014
- Aug 16, 2014 Working hard for the money: 2014 update Aug 16, 2014
- Aug 15, 2014 “Where do you get your ideas?” is an understandable but impossible-to-answer question for authors. But “Nuns at Scout camp” will be one of my answers someday. Aug 15, 2014
- Aug 14, 2014 I won a Moth StorySLAM, and that wasn’t the best part of the night. Seriously. Aug 14, 2014
- Aug 14, 2014 This is not the look a father wants to see on his little girl's face. Aug 14, 2014
- Aug 13, 2014 Dungeons & Dragons brought me back to writing and saved my career. Aug 13, 2014
- Aug 12, 2014 My first date advice: Tell stories. Aug 12, 2014
- Aug 12, 2014 Our daughter told us to shut up, and she was right. Aug 12, 2014
- Aug 11, 2014 Productivity tip #10: Get out of bed. Aug 11, 2014
- Aug 11, 2014 Our children, circa 1840 Aug 11, 2014
- Aug 10, 2014 Megan Washington’s stutter is just perfect Aug 10, 2014
- Aug 9, 2014 My mother looks unbelievably young, and I look even more poorly dressed than usual. Aug 9, 2014
- Aug 9, 2014 Unfair assumption #19: The desire for a specific postage stamp is a clear indication of the need for a life. Aug 9, 2014
- Aug 8, 2014 Possible future artist (and something else, I hope) Aug 8, 2014
- Aug 8, 2014 Stupid super dads suck Aug 8, 2014
- Aug 7, 2014 When it comes of purposeful procrastination, Mark Twain agreed with me. I can’t be nearly as stupid as people think. Aug 7, 2014
- Aug 6, 2014 Amber has every right to hate Sophia. I should know. Aug 6, 2014
- Aug 6, 2014 Productivity tip #9: If your friends think your boyfriend is a jerk, he’s a jerk. Aug 6, 2014
- Aug 5, 2014 I suffered a wardrobe malfunction. I told the audience that they suck. Just another day in the life of an author. Aug 5, 2014
- Aug 5, 2014 I hereby release myself of all parental guilt regarding the iPad. It was shortsighted, stupid, and purposelessly nostalgic. Aug 5, 2014
- Aug 4, 2014 My daughter thinks she’s found the next Jackson Pollock. Or maybe she just loves her brother. Aug 4, 2014
- Aug 3, 2014 Five ways I’ll know that I’ve finally made it as a screenwriter. Aug 3, 2014
- Aug 3, 2014 I wrote about a dream I had last night. Three dreams, actually. But hearing about dreams usually sucks, so feel free to ignore. Aug 3, 2014
- Aug 2, 2014 Married to Carrie-Anne Moss Aug 2, 2014
- Aug 1, 2014 Grandparents kicking millennials’ asses Aug 1, 2014
- Aug 1, 2014 Resolution update: July 2014 Aug 1, 2014
July 2014
- Jul 31, 2014 What do you want inscribed on your gravestone? Jul 31, 2014
- Jul 30, 2014 John Lennon’s “Imagine” is not a good song. I think you’ll agree. Jul 30, 2014
- Jul 30, 2014 Lucky Nani Jul 30, 2014
- Jul 29, 2014 The solution to all of my ponytail, pigtail, and braiding woes Jul 29, 2014
- Jul 29, 2014 Friendly’s slogans leave a lot to be desired Jul 29, 2014
- Jul 28, 2014 You’ll be shocked to discover who favors old fashioned ink and paper over digital composition Jul 28, 2014
- Jul 28, 2014 She can't fly, which would be cool, but my daughter's super power is still impressive. Jul 28, 2014
- Jul 27, 2014 Sister loves brother Jul 27, 2014
- Jul 26, 2014 I don’t love bathing my kids. Except I often do. Jul 26, 2014
- Jul 26, 2014 My annual list of my shortcomings and flaws is being written now. Suggestions welcomed. Jul 26, 2014
- Jul 25, 2014 Boy learns the alphabet on his own. Father takes credit. Jul 25, 2014
- Jul 25, 2014 Future Futurist. Actually, current futurist, looking for his first paycheck. Jul 25, 2014
- Jul 24, 2014 What were the three most important decisions of your life? Jul 24, 2014
- Jul 23, 2014 Own your crazy Jul 23, 2014
- Jul 22, 2014 I live in a country where Janet Jackson’s boob receives more attention than net neutrality. Jul 22, 2014
- Jul 22, 2014 It’s just a table with some crayons and paints and paper, but in a surprising way, it’s changed the course of my children's lives. Jul 22, 2014
- Jul 21, 2014 Declare your parental pride. Make the world better for the parent of a newborn. Jul 21, 2014
- Jul 20, 2014 Contrary to popular belief, parents and teachers are well aware of the existence of Sparknotes. Jul 20, 2014
- Jul 19, 2014 My daughter, the old lady. Jul 19, 2014
- Jul 18, 2014 A visit from Mom Jul 18, 2014
- Jul 18, 2014 New rule: Women should not make sweeping generalizations about women. Jul 18, 2014
- Jul 17, 2014 Stop the retirement madness. Please. Jul 17, 2014
- Jul 16, 2014 Starbucks offers me one more reason to love my wife Jul 16, 2014
- Jul 16, 2014 I am like a tree in one very specific way, at least according to my daughter. Jul 16, 2014
- Jul 15, 2014 99 more reasons that I love Elysha Dicks Jul 15, 2014
- Jul 14, 2014 The amazing, astounding Abercrombie adults Jul 14, 2014
- Jul 14, 2014 I worry that George R.R. Martin will die before finishing his Song of Fire and Ice series, and yes, that’s not a nice thing to think. Jul 14, 2014
- Jul 13, 2014 Productivity tip #8: A succinct and accurate description of my work flow Jul 13, 2014
- Jul 12, 2014 No one talks baby off the hill Jul 12, 2014
- Jul 12, 2014 The exuberance of elderly warriors Jul 12, 2014
- Jul 11, 2014 Serious geography geek material Jul 11, 2014
- Jul 10, 2014 The boys at the Big Swim Meet had no idea how fleeting boyhood is. Once gone, you will long for it forever. Jul 10, 2014
- Jul 10, 2014 Someone ruined cookies, too. Jul 10, 2014
- Jul 9, 2014 Vegetable ice cream is wrong. Jul 9, 2014
- Jul 9, 2014 Sometimes a cell phone holster can tell you a lot about a person Jul 9, 2014
- Jul 8, 2014 My wife is annoyed by our 10% deal. I’m so glad. Jul 8, 2014
- Jul 8, 2014 Posthumous vindication sucks. Jul 8, 2014
- Jul 7, 2014 Carte Blanche Summers: My first column Jul 7, 2014
- Jul 7, 2014 The payoff for a writer or a performer is an infinitesimal sliver of the job. Too many forget this and aren’t willing to do the work. Jul 7, 2014
- Jul 6, 2014 The best clause in any contract ever Jul 6, 2014
- Jul 6, 2014 Stay close, little ones. Jul 6, 2014
- Jul 5, 2014 Most of us don’t watch Fox News, little ones. Jul 5, 2014
- Jul 5, 2014 You can’t blow out electric lights… Jul 5, 2014
- Jul 4, 2014 There are many reasons why the death penalty should be abolished. But one reason should be reason enough. Jul 4, 2014
- Jul 4, 2014 I’m left handed but learned to play baseball right handed to save money. Jul 4, 2014
- Jul 3, 2014 My first paid writing gig was for my very own paper mill. It made me the writer I am today. Jul 3, 2014
- Jul 3, 2014 I’m a much better dancer than my son. Jul 3, 2014
- Jul 2, 2014 Moth victories are so much better with my septuagenarian hipster in-laws in attendance Jul 2, 2014
- Jul 2, 2014 My wife’s solution to the problem was to knock on a stranger’s door and ask to borrow clothing. Seriously. Jul 2, 2014
- Jul 1, 2014 The question all successful people can answer immediately: What’s your super power? Jul 1, 2014
- Jul 1, 2014 So this happened for about 30 minutes yesterday. Should I be worried? Jul 1, 2014
- Jul 1, 2014 Resolution update: June 2014 Jul 1, 2014
June 2014
- Jun 30, 2014 The ad has good intentions, but it doesn’t depict reality, and that could be more damaging to girls than no ad at all. Jun 30, 2014
- Jun 30, 2014 Has there ever been a better big sister? Jun 30, 2014
- Jun 29, 2014 Hilarious. Genius. Not entirely safe for work. Jun 29, 2014
- Jun 29, 2014 Manly words. Girly words. How many of each do you know? Jun 29, 2014
- Jun 28, 2014 Halloween circa 1978 Jun 28, 2014
- Jun 28, 2014 Truth Jun 28, 2014
- Jun 27, 2014 Boy fakes his own kidnapping to avoid dentist. A hero emerges in the process. Jun 27, 2014
- Jun 27, 2014 Sad, pathetic children Jun 27, 2014
- Jun 27, 2014 Speak Up tickets, dates for upcoming shows, and a writer's workshop launch Jun 27, 2014
- Jun 26, 2014 Golf is in a decline because people are stupid. Jun 26, 2014
- Jun 26, 2014 Dating in a perfect, bookish world Jun 26, 2014
- Jun 25, 2014 Someone stole my idea for professional best man and made a movie out of it. Jun 25, 2014
- Jun 25, 2014 Preschool graduation! Jun 25, 2014
- Jun 24, 2014 Skinned knees are no big deal. Preferable, even. Jun 24, 2014
- Jun 24, 2014 Four of my books and one dead unicorn Jun 24, 2014
- Jun 23, 2014 Speak Up at The Mount! Jun 23, 2014
- Jun 23, 2014 Productivity tip #7: Push your lawnmower. Jun 23, 2014
- Jun 22, 2014 Bad genes. At least according to my wife. Jun 22, 2014
- Jun 21, 2014 I am a legitimate fashion icon. A trendsetter. The New York Times says so. Jun 21, 2014
- Jun 20, 2014 Chef Clara Jun 20, 2014
- Jun 20, 2014 Every day contains a story Jun 20, 2014
- Jun 19, 2014 Walking an elephant at the mall is still fun Jun 19, 2014
- Jun 19, 2014 The demographics of the Republican Party are astounding. Jun 19, 2014
- Jun 18, 2014 Best Internet comment ever Jun 18, 2014
- Jun 17, 2014 Did you know that Daddy doesn't sleep. My daughter has proof. Jun 17, 2014
- Jun 17, 2014 Mens is wrong Jun 17, 2014
- Jun 16, 2014 Pitchers who intentionally hit batters are cowards Jun 16, 2014
- Jun 16, 2014 Future laborer, I hope. Jun 16, 2014
- Jun 15, 2014 Little boy in a box Jun 15, 2014
- Jun 14, 2014 My daughter’s has a tough road ahead. Her parents do, too. Jun 14, 2014
- Jun 13, 2014 If given the choice, I choose this tea party over the one that advocates killing gay people. Jun 13, 2014
- Jun 12, 2014 Did you know that Fastball’s “The Way” is a song about an elderly couple that was found dead at the bottom of a cliff? Jun 12, 2014
- Jun 11, 2014 Opinions on parenting that differ from your own should not turn you into a raging lunatic. Jun 11, 2014
- Jun 11, 2014 “House on a Hill” Jun 11, 2014
- Jun 10, 2014 He loves trash. If only my greatest desires were so simple. Jun 10, 2014
- Jun 9, 2014 What is Peter Segal thinking? You don’t replace an 80 year-old man with a 74 year-old man. Jun 9, 2014
- Jun 9, 2014 The Moth: Battle at Big Sky Jun 9, 2014
- Jun 8, 2014 My emotional pants Jun 8, 2014
- Jun 8, 2014 My constant reminder Jun 8, 2014
- Jun 7, 2014 Our newest superhero (and her underwear is on the inside!) Jun 7, 2014
- Jun 6, 2014 No better start to the day Jun 6, 2014
- Jun 5, 2014 Remember Tank Man. Jun 5, 2014
- Jun 5, 2014 I’m apparently the dishwasher. Jun 5, 2014
- Jun 4, 2014 Three years ago, I dreamed of telling a story on a Moth stage. Today I am a storyteller. Life can change quickly if you give it a chance. Jun 4, 2014
- Jun 3, 2014 My new best friend lives in Ecuador and has great taste in books and culture Jun 3, 2014
- Jun 2, 2014 My TEDx Somerville Talk: “A Life of Yes” Jun 2, 2014
- Jun 1, 2014 Little litter combatant Jun 1, 2014
- Jun 1, 2014 Resolution update: May 2014 Jun 1, 2014
May 2014
- May 31, 2014 She claims that she wasn’t going for matchy-matchy, but I don’t believe her. May 31, 2014
- May 31, 2014 I want one now. May 31, 2014
- May 30, 2014 Just eliminate gift registries entirely. Also, divorce registries are disgusting. May 30, 2014
- May 30, 2014 Our Norman Rockwell daughter May 30, 2014
- May 29, 2014 “Fun” is the word most often missing from education today. It’s practically nonexistent. May 29, 2014
- May 29, 2014 The three great leaders of my life May 29, 2014
- May 28, 2014 Possible lessons to be learned from Weezer’s unexpected path to success May 28, 2014
- May 27, 2014 The marching band and free hot dogs were great, but the drag queen was the best part of the parade. May 27, 2014
- May 27, 2014 The New York Post’s Kim Kardashian - Kanye West wedding announcement was quite educational. May 27, 2014
- May 26, 2014 I had a story on This American Life. The reaction to this news has been interesting. May 26, 2014
- May 26, 2014 Are toddlers really smarter than the elderly? May 26, 2014
- May 25, 2014 The fascinating history of Softsoap: A lesson in ingenuity and tenacity May 25, 2014
- May 24, 2014 Upcoming appearances May 24, 2014
- May 24, 2014 The secret to happiness is based upon perspective and expectation. May 24, 2014
- May 23, 2014 Storytellers are important, but it’s within the audience that you find the true beauty of storytelling. May 23, 2014
- May 22, 2014 I am happily clueless about many things. It seems to make people very angry. May 22, 2014
- May 22, 2014 SportsCenter anchor? No big deal. Actor in a 30 second commercial? AWE INSPIRING. May 22, 2014
- May 21, 2014 Deathbed regrets revisited 2014 May 21, 2014
- May 20, 2014 The brief but surprising history of Uggs May 20, 2014
- May 19, 2014 Small boy. Big words. Enormous inspiration. May 19, 2014
- May 19, 2014 The kid is a player. May 19, 2014
- May 18, 2014 Students can do amazing things when they want to annoy their teacher. May 18, 2014
- May 17, 2014 How to Stop a Wedding: Much better advice than what Slate had to offer. May 17, 2014
- May 17, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Cara Paiuk May 17, 2014
- May 16, 2014 Second-hand Milo May 16, 2014
- May 16, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Lynelle Abel May 16, 2014
- May 15, 2014 Our tiny barrier to productivity May 15, 2014
- May 15, 2014 The Patriots new jersey guarantee highlights the struggles of NFL players May 15, 2014
- May 15, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Angela Lovell May 15, 2014
- May 14, 2014 So sadly true May 14, 2014
- May 14, 2014 Speak Up storytelling: Risa Sugarman May 14, 2014
- May 13, 2014 Why do I remember my childhood with such clarity when so many others do not? May 13, 2014
- May 13, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Tom Reed-Swale May 13, 2014
- May 12, 2014 Watch this. May 12, 2014
- May 11, 2014 Best Teacher Appreciation Day gift ever May 11, 2014
- May 11, 2014 The NFL draft is kind of dumb. But this story is AWESOME. May 11, 2014
- May 11, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Doreen Stern May 11, 2014
- May 11, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Alan MacKenzie May 11, 2014
- May 10, 2014 Goodnight Moon with her little brother May 10, 2014
- May 9, 2014 Napping will kill you. Science says so. May 9, 2014
- May 9, 2014 Productivity tip #6: Calculate the cost of your meeting and act accordingly May 9, 2014
- May 8, 2014 College is possible for all. Even for those who graduate from high school and find themselves on their own. May 8, 2014
- May 7, 2014 What's the Hardest Part of Parenting? May 7, 2014
- May 7, 2014 Stop and watch. May 7, 2014
- May 6, 2014 Two conditions are required for justified embarrassment. If these conditions are not present, move on with your life. May 6, 2014
- May 5, 2014 Three years of storytelling with The Moth May 5, 2014
- May 5, 2014 Our children can entertain themselves for long stretches of time. I fear it’s the result of exceedingly boring parents. May 5, 2014
- May 4, 2014 Stupid but forgiven May 4, 2014
- May 4, 2014 The best use of cell phone jamming technology is not being utilized, and I don’t understand why. May 4, 2014
- May 3, 2014 A simple solution to the lemon and lime shortage that will improve your life at the same time May 3, 2014
- May 2, 2014 The double standard of sexist statements May 2, 2014
- May 2, 2014 Puddle jumpers May 2, 2014
- May 1, 2014 My appearance on The Moth Radio Hour May 1, 2014
- May 1, 2014 I want one. May 1, 2014
- May 1, 2014 Resolution update: April 2014 May 1, 2014
April 2014
- Apr 30, 2014 Poetry is not for the faint of heart. At least mine apparently isn’t. Apr 30, 2014
- Apr 30, 2014 Quite possibly the cutest moment in my son’s entire life, which would be unfortunate. Apr 30, 2014
- Apr 29, 2014 We don’t always treat kids fairly when it comes to food and choice Apr 29, 2014
- Apr 29, 2014 Little people pushing little carriages Apr 29, 2014
- Apr 28, 2014 My English degree finally pays off. Apr 28, 2014
- Apr 28, 2014 Look what my wife made! Apr 28, 2014
- Apr 27, 2014 New rule: NO MORE WEATHER TALK Apr 27, 2014
- Apr 26, 2014 It’s the second parent’s second opinion that is often most valuable Apr 26, 2014
- Apr 25, 2014 Productivity tip #5: Fewer shoes Apr 25, 2014
- Apr 25, 2014 Someone actually ruined bacon. Apr 25, 2014
- Apr 24, 2014 No makeup is a thing now. Turns out that I was merely ahead of the curve. Apr 24, 2014
- Apr 24, 2014 Speak Up tickets now on sale Apr 24, 2014
- Apr 23, 2014 Based upon his 8 tips for writing short stories, I think Vonnegut would’ve made a great storyteller. Apr 23, 2014
- Apr 23, 2014 Freeze this moment, damn it. Apr 23, 2014
- Apr 22, 2014 Why we don’t fight Apr 22, 2014
- Apr 21, 2014 Giving my girl a smile and some good luck Apr 21, 2014
- Apr 21, 2014 Productivity tip #4: Walk fast. Apr 21, 2014
- Apr 20, 2014 Incompetent customer service saves Amtrak and Boston Market a total of $33.03 and costs them customers and reputation as a result. Apr 20, 2014
- Apr 19, 2014 Speak Up offering storytelling workshops Apr 19, 2014
- Apr 19, 2014 Will my daughter miss out on the culture of cruel pranks and purposeful, public embarrassment because she is a girl? If so, I’m sad. Also, why? Apr 19, 2014
- Apr 18, 2014 15 thoughts from a Moth StorySLAM Apr 18, 2014
- Apr 18, 2014 Did we buy this for the cat or the boy? Apr 18, 2014
- Apr 17, 2014 Photoshop? No. Apr 17, 2014
- Apr 17, 2014 Charlie says yes to chocolate-covered matzo Apr 17, 2014
- Apr 16, 2014 Completely cringe-worthy and painful to watch(unless you’re mean like me) Apr 16, 2014
- Apr 16, 2014 Don’t even try to invade North Hampton Apr 16, 2014
- Apr 15, 2014 Dictionary revision required Apr 15, 2014
- Apr 15, 2014 Spite is good. Science agrees. Tim Martin agrees. Apr 15, 2014
- Apr 14, 2014 Writers Abroad and perhaps a writing program for adults, too? Apr 14, 2014
- Apr 14, 2014 Chipotle and education: Upside-down organizations where the best people are removed from the most important positions Apr 14, 2014
- Apr 13, 2014 24 thoughts from my weekend at Booktopia Apr 13, 2014
- Apr 13, 2014 My boy and me Apr 13, 2014
- Apr 12, 2014 So much for Mommy and Daddy… Apr 12, 2014
- Apr 12, 2014 If no one believes your lie, what’s the point? Apr 12, 2014
- Apr 11, 2014 My novels are ruining geometry class and destroying readers. The unexpected benefits of publishing a book. Apr 11, 2014
- Apr 11, 2014 Upcoming speaking gigs Apr 11, 2014
- Apr 10, 2014 Intelligent disobedience Apr 10, 2014
- Apr 10, 2014 A good life Apr 10, 2014
- Apr 9, 2014 Early morning warriors (or lunatics) Apr 9, 2014
- Apr 9, 2014 Cheerios and a tower Apr 9, 2014
- Apr 8, 2014 Love me some angry bigots Apr 8, 2014
- Apr 8, 2014 The New York Times gets haiku all wrong, and I’m infuriated. Probably more than I should be. Apr 8, 2014
- Apr 7, 2014 Casual Friday EVERYDAY could save the world (and your soul) Apr 7, 2014
- Apr 7, 2014 Unnecessarily dangerous Apr 7, 2014
- Apr 6, 2014 My kids like flowers. I don’t get it. Apr 6, 2014
- Apr 5, 2014 Suspiciously perfect start to the day Apr 5, 2014
- Apr 4, 2014 You’re not in trouble if the only consequence is a verbal reminder. Apr 4, 2014
- Apr 4, 2014 Street typography Apr 4, 2014
- Apr 3, 2014 My uninspired work space Apr 3, 2014
- Apr 2, 2014 I will zip no more! Apr 2, 2014
- Apr 2, 2014 Resolution update: March 2014 Apr 2, 2014
- Apr 1, 2014 Mary Poppins was right about teaching. We would all do well to listen to her. Apr 1, 2014
- Apr 1, 2014 Mother-son moments Apr 1, 2014
March 2014
- Mar 31, 2014 I’ve always thought that a library fine was a good thing. Unexpected income. Some librarians have disagreed. Am I wrong? Mar 31, 2014
- Mar 30, 2014 Itsy Bitsy Spider and Wheels on the Bus Mar 30, 2014
- Mar 30, 2014 Never took the SAT Mar 30, 2014
- Mar 29, 2014 If you haven’t seen White House Down yet, don’t. You’ve probably seen it already and just don’t realize it. Mar 29, 2014
- Mar 28, 2014 Things You Should Do Everyday to Improve Your Life For Real: Give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Mar 28, 2014
- Mar 28, 2014 Speak Up storytelling: Pam Murphy Mar 28, 2014
- Mar 28, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Andy Christie Mar 28, 2014
- Mar 27, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Kathy Binder Mar 27, 2014
- Mar 26, 2014 Television is so much better today Mar 26, 2014
- Mar 26, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Lynelle Abel Mar 26, 2014
- Mar 25, 2014 The Moth: Sit ups Mar 25, 2014
- Mar 25, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Robert Fiedler Mar 25, 2014
- Mar 25, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Phil Woods Mar 25, 2014
- Mar 24, 2014 Thoughts on The Book of Mormon Mar 24, 2014
- Mar 24, 2014 She found my hat. Mar 24, 2014
- Mar 24, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Robin Gelfenbien Mar 24, 2014
- Mar 23, 2014 Car seats begone! Mar 23, 2014
- Mar 23, 2014 A more accurate Out of Office reply Mar 23, 2014
- Mar 21, 2014 A humble offer to Dunkin’ Donuts Mar 21, 2014
- Mar 21, 2014 Awaiting the return of King of the Bed Mar 21, 2014
- Mar 21, 2014 Words of encouragement Mar 21, 2014
- Mar 20, 2014 So much for “Vomit-Free Since ‘83” Mar 20, 2014
- Mar 19, 2014 Judd Apatow’s Freaks and Geeks determined the plot. My characters do the same. Mar 19, 2014
- Mar 19, 2014 Starting early Mar 19, 2014
- Mar 18, 2014 Parenting does not suck. It’s just that some people suck at life. Mar 18, 2014
- Mar 17, 2014 Toys don't mean as much when you're not allowed to play indoors. Mar 17, 2014
- Mar 17, 2014 A different kind of sibling love Mar 17, 2014
- Mar 16, 2014 Her biggest fan Mar 16, 2014
- Mar 15, 2014 My little farm boy Mar 15, 2014
- Mar 14, 2014 Productivity tip #3: No one cares (or even notices) what you look like. Mar 14, 2014
- Mar 14, 2014 Wes Anderson loves yellow, orange and brown. I do not. Mar 14, 2014
- Mar 13, 2014 Speak Up! Mar 13, 2014
- Mar 13, 2014 Worst lawyer commercial ever made Mar 13, 2014
- Mar 12, 2014 The possible closing of a school is hard enough already. Compassion and sensitivity should be the order of the day. Mar 12, 2014
- Mar 12, 2014 Clara’s deep thoughts while reading Neil Gaiman’s Instructions Mar 12, 2014
- Mar 11, 2014 Pressure is a privilege Mar 11, 2014
- Mar 11, 2014 Can’t imagine where she gets this. Mar 11, 2014
- Mar 10, 2014 My daughter has an imaginary friend. Mar 10, 2014
- Mar 10, 2014 When you care enough about the lady in your life to purchase an app and automate your expressions of affection Mar 10, 2014
- Mar 9, 2014 My brand new, completely unrealistic, possibly supercilious goal that you should try, too. Mar 9, 2014
- Mar 9, 2014 Brilliant writing can be found anywhere. Mar 9, 2014
- Mar 8, 2014 Fathers don't get to teach their children to swim anymore. Mar 8, 2014
- Mar 8, 2014 Putt-Putt Perfection Mar 8, 2014
- Mar 7, 2014 Amazing Mommy Mar 7, 2014
- Mar 7, 2014 Exit the bigots Mar 7, 2014
- Mar 6, 2014 Japan is a scary place. Mar 6, 2014
- Mar 6, 2014 I had problems with the ending of The Lord of the Rings, but it had little to do with Frodo and Sam’s fate. Mar 6, 2014
- Mar 5, 2014 The greatest source of discontent in my marriage may be this Cadillac commercial, which I adore. Mar 5, 2014
- Mar 5, 2014 The Moth: Deformed Cow and Moonlight Deer Mar 5, 2014
- Mar 4, 2014 Barbara Green is a literary hero in a small town in Italy. And in my heart. Mar 4, 2014
- Mar 4, 2014 North Korean nightmare Mar 4, 2014
- Mar 3, 2014 A new favorite photo of my children Mar 3, 2014
- Mar 3, 2014 Facebookless friends Mar 3, 2014
- Mar 3, 2014 Resolution update: February 2014 Mar 3, 2014
- Mar 2, 2014 A unicorn and the tendency towards loss aversion result in cleaner teeth and a new idea in behavior management. Mar 2, 2014
- Mar 2, 2014 Man collects Pop Tarts. Pop Tarts turn 50 this week. Man enjoys his 3 minutes of fame. Mar 2, 2014
- Mar 1, 2014 I may not be an author yet, but I write like one. Mar 1, 2014
February 2014
- Feb 28, 2014 Big news does not mean big numbers when it comes to same sex marriage. Feb 28, 2014
- Feb 28, 2014 Ginger was a ginger Feb 28, 2014
- Feb 27, 2014 Teaching is not quite a minimum wage job, despite what my students may think. Feb 27, 2014
- Feb 27, 2014 The Reverse Nap: Mounting evidence that I am not a crazy person Feb 27, 2014
- Feb 26, 2014 Ignorance is bliss Feb 26, 2014
- Feb 26, 2014 The Moth: Shoe Thief Feb 26, 2014
- Feb 25, 2014 What kind of food is this? Feb 25, 2014
- Feb 25, 2014 Joining the war against nonplussed is flammable/inflammable Feb 25, 2014
- Feb 24, 2014 I’m launching an email newsletter. What should be included? Feb 24, 2014
- Feb 24, 2014 For my daughter. And all daughters. Feb 24, 2014
- Feb 24, 2014 The many faces of Charles Wallace Feb 24, 2014
- Feb 23, 2014 The peanut butter and tuna fish sandwich Feb 23, 2014
- Feb 23, 2014 A death threat, courtesy of the Yellow Pages Feb 23, 2014
- Feb 22, 2014 The Moth: Black and White in Washington Feb 22, 2014
- Feb 22, 2014 A silver lining to rapidly increasing climate change Feb 22, 2014
- Feb 21, 2014 The average husband would choose the cash and time over well appointed fingernails. Feb 21, 2014
- Feb 21, 2014 What the hell is going on in Kansas? Feb 21, 2014
- Feb 20, 2014 Everything happens for a reason, especially when your life is good. Feb 20, 2014
- Feb 20, 2014 Advertising goes both ways. Feb 20, 2014
- Feb 19, 2014 Food allergy skeptics suck. Feb 19, 2014
- Feb 19, 2014 The world is rapidly leaving the bigots behind Feb 19, 2014
- Feb 18, 2014 Dumb people help make dreams come true Feb 18, 2014
- Feb 18, 2014 “Nonplussed” is going down. Feb 18, 2014
- Feb 17, 2014 The best words ever spoken to me. Ever. Feb 17, 2014
- Feb 17, 2014 The shouting is amusing, but it’s the makeup that bothers the hell out of me Feb 17, 2014
- Feb 16, 2014 Fourth greatest compliment ever Feb 16, 2014
- Feb 16, 2014 I’m not careless. I’m just stupid and preoccupied. Feb 16, 2014
- Feb 15, 2014 Am I really so annoying? Feb 15, 2014
- Feb 14, 2014 The most amazing door you will ever see Feb 14, 2014
- Feb 14, 2014 My daughter’s fifth birthday party was violent, competitive and AWESOME Feb 14, 2014
- Feb 13, 2014 NFL players are clearly the most distractible people on the planet Feb 13, 2014
- Feb 13, 2014 Best packaging ever Feb 13, 2014
- Feb 12, 2014 Helicopter parenting has gone national Feb 12, 2014
- Feb 12, 2014 Tim Burton apparently agrees: Spite is the best reason to do anything Feb 12, 2014
- Feb 11, 2014 Productivity tip #2: Listen to the 120 year-old version of yourself and stop playing stupid games on your phone. Feb 11, 2014
- Feb 10, 2014 The definition of hubris Feb 10, 2014
- Feb 10, 2014 More airlines embracing the Spiderman Principle of Meetings and Presentations Feb 10, 2014
- Feb 9, 2014 Self love is a battlefield. In Idaho, at least. Feb 9, 2014
- Feb 9, 2014 Tires in need of slashing Feb 9, 2014
- Feb 8, 2014 Greatest Super Bowl commercial ever Feb 8, 2014
- Feb 7, 2014 I love my job when I don’t hate it. Feb 7, 2014
- Feb 7, 2014 Why I use “Warmly” Feb 7, 2014
- Feb 6, 2014 Upcoming speaking events Feb 6, 2014
- Feb 5, 2014 My daughter used a hammer and built a car. She’s already more competent than her dad. Feb 5, 2014
- Feb 4, 2014 The Spiderman Principle of Meetings and Presentations Feb 4, 2014
- Feb 3, 2014 If Dennis is a dentist, what is a Dicks? Feb 3, 2014
- Feb 3, 2014 Friends should not be allowed to retire if they’re going to have this much fun. Feb 3, 2014
- Feb 2, 2014 I am stupid and sensual Feb 2, 2014
- Feb 2, 2014 Quite possibly the single greatest parenting moment ever Feb 2, 2014
- Feb 1, 2014 Sheryl Sandberg made me feel like a misfit Feb 1, 2014
- Feb 1, 2014 Much improved without me Feb 1, 2014
- Feb 1, 2014 Resolution update: January 2014 Feb 1, 2014
January 2014
- Jan 31, 2014 My new favorite photo of my girl Jan 31, 2014
- Jan 30, 2014 Good news! America’s second favorite book is an actual book. Jan 30, 2014
- Jan 30, 2014 I like their bagels, but this doesn’t inspire a return visit from me Jan 30, 2014
- Jan 29, 2014 The Moth: Trigger Pulled Jan 29, 2014
- Jan 29, 2014 My boy has good taste. Jan 29, 2014
- Jan 28, 2014 An unexpected silver lining (including butts with wings) in this brave new publishing world Jan 28, 2014
- Jan 27, 2014 My two words Jan 27, 2014
- Jan 27, 2014 My mother missed my new life by four years. Jan 27, 2014
- Jan 26, 2014 My wife, the fashion designer Jan 26, 2014
- Jan 25, 2014 Four no more. Jan 25, 2014
- Jan 25, 2014 Walter Cronkite rolled over in his grave Jan 25, 2014
- Jan 24, 2014 Dolly Gray Children’s Literature Award Jan 24, 2014
- Jan 23, 2014 Change the world by changing the paradigm of meetings. PLEASE. Jan 23, 2014
- Jan 22, 2014 The Greatest Generation is mine Jan 22, 2014
- Jan 22, 2014 First date with Elysha: I also had no idea if we were on a date or just “hanging out.” Jan 22, 2014
- Jan 21, 2014 Productivity tip #1: Don’t fall behind. Jan 21, 2014
- Jan 20, 2014 My very first library book found! Jan 20, 2014
- Jan 20, 2014 My daughter attributes her difficulties with sharing to the assassination of MLK Jan 20, 2014
- Jan 19, 2014 The perpetual search for a good parking spot is probably insane Jan 19, 2014
- Jan 18, 2014 Boy and girl in dryer Jan 18, 2014
- Jan 18, 2014 Is Jimmy Fallon the coolest man on Earth? Jan 18, 2014
- Jan 17, 2014 The Moth: The Turtle and Me Jan 17, 2014
- Jan 17, 2014 Helmet head Jan 17, 2014
- Jan 16, 2014 My daughter is tougher than a thousand Moth judges. Jan 16, 2014
- Jan 16, 2014 I’m apparently competing against myself now. Jan 16, 2014
- Jan 16, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Rachel Leventhal-Weiner Jan 16, 2014
- Jan 15, 2014 For sale: Stolen Childhood Dreams Jan 15, 2014
- Jan 15, 2014 May he always be this happy Jan 15, 2014
- Jan 15, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: John Leahy Jan 15, 2014
- Jan 14, 2014 The Moth: The Tyranny of the 10-Speed Bike Jan 14, 2014
- Jan 14, 2014 Is this generation of grandparents different than previous generations, or is this bald, bespectacled man just unusual? Jan 14, 2014
- Jan 14, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Andrew Mayo Jan 14, 2014
- Jan 13, 2014 Advancements in medical technology are amazing. I dread every one of them. Jan 13, 2014
- Jan 13, 2014 iPad in an oven Jan 13, 2014
- Jan 13, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Chris Hall Jan 13, 2014
- Jan 12, 2014 Water fountain failure Jan 12, 2014
- Jan 12, 2014 The kid has a data driven writing process Jan 12, 2014
- Jan 12, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Jennifer Stanish Jan 12, 2014
- Jan 11, 2014 His first selfie Jan 11, 2014
- Jan 11, 2014 My TED Talk: Speak Less. Expect More. Jan 11, 2014
- Jan 11, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Nathaniel Bates Jan 11, 2014
- Jan 11, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Christina O’Sullivan Jan 11, 2014
- Jan 10, 2014 My future worker bees Jan 10, 2014
- Jan 10, 2014 Speak Up storyteller: Cara Paiuk Jan 10, 2014
- Jan 9, 2014 My super powers Jan 9, 2014
- Jan 9, 2014 The Moth: Plane Delayed Jan 9, 2014
- Jan 8, 2014 When it comes to social media, leave teachers out of it. They love your child too much. Jan 8, 2014
- Jan 7, 2014 IMDB, baby. Jan 7, 2014
- Jan 7, 2014 New Speak Up dates announced Jan 7, 2014
- Jan 6, 2014 Do I know Dan Kennedy? Jan 6, 2014
- Jan 6, 2014 I am not a Johnny Manziel fan but… Jan 6, 2014
- Jan 5, 2014 Male lions aren’t lazy after all. They are actually more efficient than female lions. Jan 5, 2014
- Jan 5, 2014 Watch The Rolling Stones write “Sympathy for the Devil” Jan 5, 2014
- Jan 4, 2014 Lessons from another evening at The Moth: Storytellers’ reactions to a loss can differ greatly. Occasionally they suck. Jan 4, 2014
- Jan 3, 2014 The Michael Jackson video game was a thing. Jan 3, 2014
- Jan 3, 2014 Idaho acknowledges that the death penalty kills innocent people. Jan 3, 2014
- Jan 2, 2014 New Year’s resolutions can change your life forever. Don’t let pundits tell you otherwise. Jan 2, 2014
- Jan 2, 2014 Anatomy of a possibly pathetic New Year’s Eve Jan 2, 2014
- Jan 1, 2014 New Year’s resolutions: 2014 Jan 1, 2014
- Jan 1, 2014 Resolution update: 2013 in review Jan 1, 2014
December 2013
- Dec 31, 2013 Say my name Dec 31, 2013
- Dec 30, 2013 Choosing goals for 2014 Dec 30, 2013
- Dec 30, 2013 This boy is all boy Dec 30, 2013
- Dec 30, 2013 Compelling? Truthy? Horribly narrow minded and sexist? I’m not sure. Dec 30, 2013
- Dec 29, 2013 Twas the Night Before Christmas Dec 29, 2013
- Dec 28, 2013 The shifting opinions about Santa Dec 28, 2013
- Dec 27, 2013 Portuguese! Dec 27, 2013
- Dec 26, 2013 Want to maintain longer lasting friendships? Here is my simple piece of advice. Dec 26, 2013
- Dec 26, 2013 Killing a mean teacher with the help of Santa and a pony Dec 26, 2013
- Dec 25, 2013 My 2013 Christmas haul Dec 25, 2013
- Dec 25, 2013 A writer’s worst enemy Dec 25, 2013
- Dec 24, 2013 The only thing I want for Christmas is a tiny scrap of paper Dec 24, 2013
- Dec 24, 2013 I have a lot of jobs. I have a lot of jobs that I still want. And I have a lot of occupations that I wish to pursue. Here is my 2014 list. Dec 24, 2013
- Dec 23, 2013 My 3 completely biased, overly judgmental and fully valid rules of selfies Dec 23, 2013
- Dec 22, 2013 Unfair assumption #18: Not every girl-kissing-girl moment is equal Dec 22, 2013
- Dec 22, 2013 Contender for best golf shot of the year Dec 22, 2013
- Dec 21, 2013 Bigots are better than naked priests Dec 21, 2013
- Dec 21, 2013 Future scientist? Or future member of Metallica? Dec 21, 2013
- Dec 20, 2013 I would love to play the role of Gandalf the Grey and stop trains. Just not at this moment. Dec 20, 2013
- Dec 20, 2013 My greatest treasures Dec 20, 2013
- Dec 19, 2013 The needless shortening of words is cray tradge. It must stop Dec 19, 2013
- Dec 19, 2013 Apple’s “Misunderstood” is brilliant and completely unrealistic Dec 19, 2013
- Dec 18, 2013 The Moth: The Boy’s Mother Was Dead Dec 18, 2013
- Dec 18, 2013 103 degrees Dec 18, 2013
- Dec 17, 2013 Best goals ever Dec 17, 2013
- Dec 17, 2013 Cell phone crashing: Beyond even me Dec 17, 2013
- Dec 16, 2013 2013 Matthew Dicks Holiday Gift Guide Dec 16, 2013
- Dec 16, 2013 7 serious problems with the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer television special Dec 16, 2013
- Dec 15, 2013 Saying yes to Santa Claus and everything else Dec 15, 2013
- Dec 15, 2013 Babes with books Dec 15, 2013
- Dec 14, 2013 Airlines around the world are kicking themselves for not thinking of this first. Dec 14, 2013
- Dec 14, 2013 Megyn Kelly of “the very powerful” Fox News is an expert on Santa Claus according to Megyn Kelly. She’s also despicable, at least based upon her non-apology. Dec 14, 2013
- Dec 13, 2013 A vision of the future? Dec 13, 2013
- Dec 13, 2013 Stop the madness. Allow cell phone jamming technology inside movie theaters. Dec 13, 2013
- Dec 13, 2013 About to purchase a book from Amazon? Don’t. Do this instead. Dec 13, 2013
- Dec 12, 2013 Podcast launch is imminent. Ask your awkward, possibly inappropriate, socially unaware and cringe worthy questions now! Dec 12, 2013
- Dec 12, 2013 Dinner and dancing in the dining room Dec 12, 2013
- Dec 11, 2013 Possibly illogical and misplaced anger about non-disabled actors Dec 11, 2013
- Dec 10, 2013 This level of maturity is unacceptable. Dec 10, 2013
- Dec 10, 2013 We should constantly be looking to reinvent the wheel Dec 10, 2013
- Dec 9, 2013 Microsoft can even ruin the bra. Dec 9, 2013
- Dec 9, 2013 Bill named the Bills. Dec 9, 2013
- Dec 8, 2013 My wife is right. A pantone chip would’ve been a better mascot for the Cleveland Browns. Dec 8, 2013
- Dec 8, 2013 There’s no such thing as bunny vomit Dec 8, 2013
- Dec 7, 2013 I miss the brontosaurus. Dec 7, 2013
- Dec 6, 2013 The gift of a sibling (and the stupidity of a father) Dec 6, 2013
- Dec 5, 2013 My words travel. I don’t. Dec 5, 2013
- Dec 4, 2013 Every death in A Song of Ice and Fire, displayed in rainbow-like horror Dec 4, 2013
- Dec 4, 2013 That water was inside another person Dec 4, 2013
- Dec 3, 2013 Teachers should use their first names. Honorifics confer artificial and meaningless respect. Even worse, they are sexist and demeaning to women. Dec 3, 2013
- Dec 3, 2013 Stop complimenting students. Dec 3, 2013
- Dec 3, 2013 My YouTube channel Dec 3, 2013
- Dec 2, 2013 Flying car or self-driving car? Dec 2, 2013
- Dec 2, 2013 Speak Up stories wanted Dec 2, 2013
- Dec 1, 2013 I hate Paul Mitchell, and I think you should, too. Please join me in my burning hatred for this company. It is deserved and necessary. Dec 1, 2013
- Dec 1, 2013 Resolution update: November 2013 Dec 1, 2013
November 2013
- Nov 30, 2013 I’m not the only critic of the “Shoes off” policy. There are many other people out there just as judgmental and jerky as me. Nov 30, 2013
- Nov 30, 2013 Extend your story beyond its original screen Nov 30, 2013
- Nov 29, 2013 The preferred Thanksgiving Day meal time Nov 29, 2013
- Nov 29, 2013 Let’s remember someone worth remembering Nov 29, 2013
- Nov 28, 2013 Bacon: The perfect Hanukkah treat Nov 28, 2013
- Nov 28, 2013 17 reasons why I am thankful on Thanksgiving Nov 28, 2013
- Nov 28, 2013 This piece in Slate by Allison Benedikt is ridiculous link bait. It’s also offensive to my children. Nov 28, 2013
- Nov 27, 2013 Failing as a father Nov 27, 2013
- Nov 26, 2013 The Pope and an old lady in parking lot Nov 26, 2013
- Nov 25, 2013 Best tweet ever Nov 25, 2013
- Nov 24, 2013 I split my pants EIGHT YEARS AGO. Strangers are still talking about it. Nov 24, 2013
- Nov 24, 2013 Look! An airplane! Amazing! Also the Toyota Camry you just plowed into. Nov 24, 2013
- Nov 23, 2013 Juicing is dumb. But I didn’t say it. Nov 23, 2013
- Nov 22, 2013 Lessons learned from 4 years of parenting Nov 22, 2013
- Nov 21, 2013 My son’s first steps (and a gentle shove) Nov 21, 2013
- Nov 21, 2013 Verbal sparring 101: Acts of extreme self-flagellation are very useful Nov 21, 2013
- Nov 20, 2013 How many male authors, after speaking brilliantly about writing and literature, have been asked publicly about their clothes?” I have an answer, but I suspect that some of you will want to chop my head off for it. Nov 20, 2013
- Nov 19, 2013 At least we don’t throw knives at our children Nov 19, 2013
- Nov 18, 2013 My TED Talk (if you listen closely) Nov 18, 2013
- Nov 18, 2013 I did not like Doris Lessing’s response to winning the Nobel Prize Nov 18, 2013
- Nov 17, 2013 The greatness of Guess the Animal and the stupidity of Freeze Tag. Nov 17, 2013
- Nov 17, 2013 It’s okay to make fun of fat people, but only if they are really, really fat. Nov 17, 2013
- Nov 17, 2013 It’s okay to make fun of fat people, but only if they are really, really fat. Nov 17, 2013
- Nov 16, 2013 Her first blank page Nov 16, 2013
- Nov 15, 2013 6 things you should never talk about, plus 2 of my own Nov 15, 2013
- Nov 15, 2013 “Get rid of yourself” never sounded so sweet Nov 15, 2013
- Nov 14, 2013 Verbal sparring 101: The nuclear option is effective but will leave you radioactive Nov 14, 2013
- Nov 14, 2013 What kind of jerk complains about a little music at dinnertime? Nov 14, 2013
- Nov 13, 2013 Don’t mess with Charlie Nov 13, 2013
- Nov 13, 2013 There are simply too many excellent religions to choose from today. Nov 13, 2013
- Nov 12, 2013 Hide-and-Seek’s return to glory. Nov 12, 2013
- Nov 12, 2013 My new favorite writer and her amazing piece: Ashton Kutcher Fan Fiction - The Middle School Dance Nov 12, 2013
- Nov 11, 2013 The nightmare of the pre-Internet Nov 11, 2013
- Nov 11, 2013 Could someone please invent quiet juicing? Nov 11, 2013
- Nov 10, 2013 The boy is one. Nov 10, 2013
- Nov 10, 2013 Crying at work Nov 10, 2013
- Nov 9, 2013 I hated it, then I loved it. Nov 9, 2013
- Nov 9, 2013 This won’t be cute forever Nov 9, 2013
- Nov 8, 2013 When was the last time you were bored? Nov 8, 2013
- Nov 8, 2013 Why do people cheat? Why do children misbehave? The reason is oftentimes simple. Nov 8, 2013
- Nov 8, 2013 Speak Up storytelling: Anita Flores Nov 8, 2013
- Nov 7, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Donna Gosk Nov 7, 2013
- Nov 7, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Sam Dingman Nov 7, 2013
- Nov 7, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Diana Spechler Nov 7, 2013
- Nov 7, 2013 Nothing better than a compliment and schadenfreude sandwich Nov 7, 2013
- Nov 7, 2013 The joy of Halloween has returned, even without the eggs. Nov 7, 2013
- Nov 6, 2013 The peril of Pop Tarts Nov 6, 2013
- Nov 6, 2013 Joaquin Phoenix is her uncle! Nov 6, 2013
- Nov 6, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Micaela Blei Nov 6, 2013
- Nov 6, 2013 Speak Up storytellers: James Bengiovanni Nov 6, 2013
- Nov 6, 2013 Speak Up storytellers: Plato Karafelis Nov 6, 2013
- Nov 5, 2013 My children ruined my Patriots game day perfection. Nov 5, 2013
- Nov 5, 2013 You’re making your insomnia worse. Get out of bed and do something great. Nov 5, 2013
- Nov 4, 2013 The only proper reaction to someone who has failed to give you a wedding gift Nov 4, 2013
- Nov 3, 2013 Children: Ready-made victims for your cruelest pranks Nov 3, 2013
- Nov 3, 2013 Emergency medical care apparently sucked in 1988 Nov 3, 2013
- Nov 2, 2013 Unacceptable platitude #6: “I never said I was perfect.” Nov 2, 2013
- Nov 2, 2013 The perfect encapsulation of my teaching philosophy Nov 2, 2013
- Nov 1, 2013 Pumpkins Nov 1, 2013
- Nov 1, 2013 Most quoted man Nov 1, 2013
- Nov 1, 2013 Escaping poverty, homelessness and hopelessness was incredibly hard for me. Now 80% of Americans must do the same. Nov 1, 2013
October 2013
- Oct 31, 2013 Happy Halloween! Oct 31, 2013
- Oct 31, 2013 I admire this violent, malicious man. Oct 31, 2013
- Oct 31, 2013 Ending the engagement is sometimes the only correct choice Oct 31, 2013
- Oct 30, 2013 Beyond the Margins today! Oct 30, 2013
- Oct 30, 2013 I don’t like Wes Anderson’s films Oct 30, 2013
- Oct 29, 2013 Lionel Shriver needed to take better inventory before she lamented the tragedy of her career in The New Republic. Oct 29, 2013
- Oct 29, 2013 Frozen carrots on a stick Oct 29, 2013
- Oct 28, 2013 Harry Dicks is almost worse. Oct 28, 2013
- Oct 28, 2013 Baby pushing baby Oct 28, 2013
- Oct 27, 2013 What teachers know about bedtimes Oct 27, 2013
- Oct 27, 2013 Witchcraft, I tell you! Oct 27, 2013
- Oct 26, 2013 Which okay is okay? Oct 26, 2013
- Oct 25, 2013 Hashtag excuse Oct 25, 2013
- Oct 25, 2013 Hot Buzz About Books Oct 25, 2013
- Oct 24, 2013 Licking the spoon Oct 24, 2013
- Oct 24, 2013 Unacceptable platitude #5: “It’s not the worst thing.” Oct 24, 2013
- Oct 24, 2013 Speak Up storytelling workshops Oct 24, 2013
- Oct 23, 2013 Daddy’s shoes Oct 23, 2013
- Oct 23, 2013 Wearing underwear to bed is hard work. Oct 23, 2013
- Oct 22, 2013 Worst things ever Oct 22, 2013
- Oct 22, 2013 My daughter’s first manuscript Oct 22, 2013
- Oct 21, 2013 How I determine intelligence: 2013 Oct 21, 2013
- Oct 21, 2013 My new favorite family Oct 21, 2013
- Oct 20, 2013 A tale of two story slams Oct 20, 2013
- Oct 19, 2013 If you’re critical of the National Football League, I understand completely. If you’re smug while doing so, you deserve to be kicked through a goal post. Oct 19, 2013
- Oct 18, 2013 Sometimes even golf can be stupid Oct 18, 2013
- Oct 18, 2013 All the financial advice you will ever need Oct 18, 2013
- Oct 17, 2013 Have you ever seen two more perfect little boy photographs in your life? Oct 17, 2013
- Oct 16, 2013 Clearly drunk Oct 16, 2013
- Oct 15, 2013 Sometimes there’s a fine line between creepy and cute. Oct 15, 2013
- Oct 15, 2013 Products I can’t live without: 2013 revised Oct 15, 2013
- Oct 14, 2013 Greatest touchdown call ever Oct 14, 2013
- Oct 14, 2013 I experienced genuine euphoria yesterday. Unabashed joy. Pure, unbridled happiness. When was the last time you felt that way? Oct 14, 2013
- Oct 14, 2013 Standing still is progress Oct 14, 2013
- Oct 13, 2013 A second-rate solution to the tyranny of the thank you note Oct 13, 2013
- Oct 13, 2013 Rules on how to be a man, which should not include anything related to physical appearance or handcrafted firearms. Oct 13, 2013
- Oct 12, 2013 A potato chip bag and a palace: Two sides of the same coin. Oct 12, 2013
- Oct 12, 2013 Soap bubble joy Oct 12, 2013
- Oct 11, 2013 The Today Show has cornered the market on young, white, blond, female kidnapping victims. You should stop watching. Oct 11, 2013
- Oct 10, 2013 Is your marriage destined for success? Rate you and your spouse using these indicators. Oct 10, 2013
- Oct 10, 2013 Overnight adventures, except they weren’t adventures at all and they sucked. Oct 10, 2013
- Oct 9, 2013 The right time and place for a mohawk Oct 9, 2013
- Oct 9, 2013 Unfair assumption #17: If you lie, conceal or refuse to divulge your age, I will automatically assume the worst. Oct 9, 2013
- Oct 8, 2013 Which book is more frightening? Oct 8, 2013
- Oct 8, 2013 Serious sibling adoration Oct 8, 2013
- Oct 7, 2013 Verbal sparring 101: Answer the rhetorical question Oct 7, 2013
- Oct 7, 2013 My namesake discovered 42 years later Oct 7, 2013
- Oct 6, 2013 How to stop a friend from driving home drunk Oct 6, 2013
- Oct 6, 2013 “And now my kids don’t die.” Oct 6, 2013
- Oct 5, 2013 Out of the frying pan… Oct 5, 2013
- Oct 5, 2013 History (and blogger) repeats itself Oct 5, 2013
- Oct 5, 2013 The boy is trouble. Oct 5, 2013
- Oct 4, 2013 Resolution update: September 2013 Oct 4, 2013
- Oct 4, 2013 Unfair assumption # 16: There is something seriously wrong with the intellect and/or self esteem of anyone who chooses to begin smoking today. Oct 4, 2013
- Oct 4, 2013 A simple way of identifying an idiot Oct 4, 2013
- Oct 3, 2013 The career of an author is not all angst and loneliness. Some of the time. Oct 3, 2013
- Oct 3, 2013 Little biker dude Oct 3, 2013
- Oct 2, 2013 I want credit for not being a jerk. Is that too much to ask? Oct 2, 2013
- Oct 2, 2013 My daughter’s inaccurate self portrait Oct 2, 2013
- Oct 1, 2013 Marital advice courtesy of a Moth StorySLAM victory Oct 1, 2013
September 2013
- Sep 30, 2013 A recap of this weekend’s Speak Up event, plus an update on the future of Speak Up Sep 30, 2013
- Sep 30, 2013 She’s in preschool and already criticizing God Sep 30, 2013
- Sep 29, 2013 The kind of love that I was probably too much of a jerk to experience firsthand Sep 29, 2013
- Sep 28, 2013 The Patriots are proof-positive that perspective is hard, if not impossible Sep 28, 2013
- Sep 28, 2013 Assuming a supervisory role Sep 28, 2013
- Sep 27, 2013 A good old fashioned book mobile! Sep 27, 2013
- Sep 27, 2013 Sunday Assembly, an atheist's version of church, seems a little too good to be true. Sep 27, 2013
- Sep 27, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Okey Ndibe Sep 27, 2013
- Sep 26, 2013 My 3 best pieces of parenting advice Sep 26, 2013
- Sep 26, 2013 God must be so angry about this. Sep 26, 2013
- Sep 26, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Barbara Klau Sep 26, 2013
- Sep 26, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Trish Milnamow Sep 26, 2013
- Sep 25, 2013 Extremely susceptible to advertising Sep 25, 2013
- Sep 25, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: LB Muñoz Sep 25, 2013
- Sep 24, 2013 Unfair assumption #15: Married couples who keep their finances separate are more likely to have seriously flawed, less fulfilling relationships. Sep 24, 2013
- Sep 24, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Charly Weiss Sep 24, 2013
- Sep 24, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Bill Wynne Sep 24, 2013
- Sep 23, 2013 Last day of summer 2013 Sep 23, 2013
- Sep 23, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Julie Threlkeld Sep 23, 2013
- Sep 23, 2013 Siri on the NFL and MLB Sep 23, 2013
- Sep 22, 2013 Special K spokesman (or spokeslittlegirl)? Sep 22, 2013
- Sep 22, 2013 If Bobby Riggs intentionally lost to Billie Jean King in The Battle of the Sexes, it matters. The truth always matters. Sep 22, 2013
- Sep 21, 2013 A genius author and I have something in common. I’m not quite the hack that I thought I was. Sep 21, 2013
- Sep 21, 2013 This pint-sized hockey fan makes your average fantasy football player look like a joke. Sep 21, 2013
- Sep 20, 2013 Apparently a lack of intelligence and decency will not prevent you from getting into college Sep 20, 2013
- Sep 19, 2013 My brothers are gone, and my heart hurts. Sep 19, 2013
- Sep 19, 2013 One of the best political ads ever made Sep 19, 2013
- Sep 17, 2013 My three favorite people Sep 17, 2013
- Sep 17, 2013 There is nothing wrong with wearing a hat at the table, regardless of what your grandmother taught you. Here’s why. Sep 17, 2013
- Sep 17, 2013 He won’t always be so easily entertained Sep 17, 2013
- Sep 16, 2013 The restaurant made me remove my hat, which angered me beyond measure. But it also reminded me of how perfect my wife is. Also, I have already plotted my revenge. Sep 16, 2013
- Sep 16, 2013 Just imagine how much better books will be when he can actually read them. Sep 16, 2013
- Sep 15, 2013 Real friends are mean as hell. Sep 15, 2013
- Sep 15, 2013 Frightening fathers everywhere Sep 15, 2013
- Sep 14, 2013 I applied AGAIN to BeautifulPeople.com, a social network for only the most beautiful of people. Here are the results of the voting. Sep 14, 2013
- Sep 14, 2013 I saved my life for the sake of my children. Sep 14, 2013
- Sep 13, 2013 This photograph is a freakin’ horror show Sep 13, 2013
- Sep 12, 2013 Moth Radio Hour appearance! Sep 12, 2013
- Sep 12, 2013 Monty Python and the Holy Grail: Twenty-first century style Sep 12, 2013
- Sep 11, 2013 “A two mommy family” Sep 11, 2013
- Sep 11, 2013 Thrilled (and possibly giddy as a schoolgirl) for a friend Sep 11, 2013
- Sep 10, 2013 Cruelty and humor wrapped up in one of the best Internet videos of all time Sep 10, 2013
- Sep 10, 2013 Two pieces of only slightly snarky advice for wedding photographers (and the couples hiring them) Sep 10, 2013
- Sep 9, 2013 September storytelling Sep 9, 2013
- Sep 9, 2013 Little boy and big boy Sep 9, 2013
- Sep 8, 2013 Summer days gone again Sep 8, 2013
- Sep 7, 2013 For almost a day, I almost thought of myself as an honest-to-goodness author. Then they took all the books away. Sep 7, 2013
- Sep 7, 2013 Best hurricane naming system ever Sep 7, 2013
- Sep 6, 2013 No one is talking about the real problem with John McCain playing poker during his briefing on the possible use of force in Syria. Sep 6, 2013
- Sep 6, 2013 Negotiating the truth Sep 6, 2013
- Sep 5, 2013 Unfair assumption #14: Any parent who leaves more than $5 under their child’s pillow in exchange for a tooth has lost their mind. Sep 5, 2013
- Sep 5, 2013 I will judge you. You should judge me. Sep 5, 2013
- Sep 4, 2013 Step 4: Do anything but “ENJOY!” Sep 4, 2013
- Sep 4, 2013 Early morning despair Sep 4, 2013
- Sep 3, 2013 Do all book critics start out this way? Sep 3, 2013
- Sep 3, 2013 Proverb 1.4 Sep 3, 2013
- Sep 2, 2013 Proverb 1.3 Sep 2, 2013
- Sep 2, 2013 The boy and the girl at the General Store Sep 2, 2013
- Sep 1, 2013 Sentimentality has its benefits. Sep 1, 2013
- Sep 1, 2013 Resolution update: August 2013 Sep 1, 2013
August 2013
- Aug 31, 2013 Best prank ever Aug 31, 2013
- Aug 31, 2013 Every Daddy’s dream Aug 31, 2013
- Aug 30, 2013 Unbridled enthusiasm Aug 30, 2013
- Aug 30, 2013 So close to joy! Aug 30, 2013
- Aug 29, 2013 Left handers rejoice! Ink smears be gone! Aug 29, 2013
- Aug 29, 2013 I still want my $25,000 back, damn it. Aug 29, 2013
- Aug 28, 2013 If you're still upset about a forgotten wedding gift, the blame my lie in your genetic code. Aug 28, 2013
- Aug 28, 2013 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2013 Aug 28, 2013
- Aug 27, 2013 Book lover today. Reader tomorrow. Aug 27, 2013
- Aug 26, 2013 Not quite me. Aug 26, 2013
- Aug 26, 2013 Little Elton John Aug 26, 2013
- Aug 25, 2013 Some golf shots are too good to be true Aug 25, 2013
- Aug 25, 2013 Returning home tomorrow. Aug 25, 2013
- Aug 24, 2013 My parental genius is finally bearing fruit. I’m not sure what exactly I did, but still, fruit! Aug 24, 2013
- Aug 24, 2013 Hot legs or hot dogs? Either is fine. Aug 24, 2013
- Aug 23, 2013 A different ending for every reader Aug 23, 2013
- Aug 23, 2013 Why I am a reluctant atheist Aug 23, 2013
- Aug 22, 2013 My storytelling secret: I’m a small, frightened man onstage. Always. Aug 22, 2013
- Aug 22, 2013 Woman are cold Aug 22, 2013
- Aug 22, 2013 If you can fly, fly. Aug 22, 2013
- Aug 21, 2013 Creating a list of things that you should never do after 50 is asinine. So are most of the items on this list. Aug 21, 2013
- Aug 20, 2013 Wigs for bald, baby girls are a thing now. Stupid parents have been around forever. Aug 20, 2013
- Aug 20, 2013 Not surprising, my wife was right again. Aug 20, 2013
- Aug 19, 2013 Baseball pitchers are cowards. All of them. Aug 19, 2013
- Aug 19, 2013 Hate the parents Aug 19, 2013
- Aug 19, 2013 Our kids don’t see us watch television. It wasn’t planned, but I’m still taking credit for it. Aug 19, 2013
- Aug 18, 2013 This Stephen Colbert segment is perfect. Stop everything and watch it now. Aug 18, 2013
- Aug 18, 2013 Can’t find the time to write? Aug 18, 2013
- Aug 17, 2013 Just so cute Aug 17, 2013
- Aug 17, 2013 Cardboard cutout cruelty Aug 17, 2013
- Aug 16, 2013 No way, Jose. Aug 16, 2013
- Aug 16, 2013 Bad ass old man of all time Aug 16, 2013
- Aug 15, 2013 Best prisoner’s dilemma ever Aug 15, 2013
- Aug 14, 2013 Credit this blog for last night’s Moth StorySLAM victory Aug 14, 2013
- Aug 14, 2013 You know that you’ve hit the big time when… Aug 14, 2013
- Aug 13, 2013 Neither true nor universally acknowledged Aug 13, 2013
- Aug 13, 2013 Don’t text and drive. Aug 13, 2013
- Aug 12, 2013 Susan Cain is right about most things, but she is wrong about death Aug 12, 2013
- Aug 11, 2013 Which would you prefer: The super supportive or hyper-critical spouse? Aug 11, 2013
- Aug 10, 2013 Elaborate prom proposals are happening. Promposals, they call them. They are stupid. Aug 10, 2013
- Aug 9, 2013 I use the word “bigot” instead of “homophobic.” You should, too. Here’s why. Aug 9, 2013
- Aug 9, 2013 The key to my heart is through a book. Aug 9, 2013
- Aug 8, 2013 Breakfast and a book Aug 8, 2013
- Aug 8, 2013 Best question of the week Aug 8, 2013
- Aug 7, 2013 Network television turns a baseball fan into the butt of a joke. Is this okay? Aug 7, 2013
- Aug 7, 2013 Unfair assumption #13: A person who says that so-and-so “has agency” was enrolled in far too many liberal arts classes. Aug 7, 2013
- Aug 6, 2013 I applied for BeautifulPeople.com, a social network for only the most beautiful of people. Here are the results of the voting. Aug 6, 2013
- Aug 6, 2013 Haunted, but the ghost is apparently a reader, so it’s okay. Aug 6, 2013
- Aug 5, 2013 My little home body Aug 5, 2013
- Aug 4, 2013 A career spent in quiet desperation Aug 4, 2013
- Aug 4, 2013 A place where time (and boys) stand still Aug 4, 2013
- Aug 3, 2013 The most terrifying 27 seconds of video that you may ever see Aug 3, 2013
- Aug 2, 2013 The Moth: The Robbery Aug 2, 2013
- Aug 2, 2013 Good Cop, Bad Cop is real. And it works. Aug 2, 2013
- Aug 1, 2013 Comebacks for sale. Cheap. Highly effective. Brutal if desired. Aug 1, 2013
- Aug 1, 2013 Resolution update: July 2013 Aug 1, 2013
July 2013
- Jul 31, 2013 Texting while doing what? Jul 31, 2013
- Jul 31, 2013 Forgotten Daddy Jul 31, 2013
- Jul 30, 2013 Mormons find doubt online Jul 30, 2013
- Jul 29, 2013 Another bad day for the bigots Jul 29, 2013
- Jul 29, 2013 Dress codes almost always suck. Jul 29, 2013
- Jul 28, 2013 Pope Francis’s unprecedented accessibility is admirable, but I wouldn’t call it brave. Jul 28, 2013
- Jul 28, 2013 Men are having butt enhancement surgery in order to increase the size of their backsides. I am hesitant to refer to them as men. Jul 28, 2013
- Jul 27, 2013 The 1970s will never be fully understood. Jul 27, 2013
- Jul 27, 2013 Only cowards take covert photographs of people in order to mock them on social media Jul 27, 2013
- Jul 26, 2013 The post partum tummy is not a taboo in Actual Town, USA. Jul 26, 2013
- Jul 26, 2013 Something appropriate to bite Jul 26, 2013
- Jul 25, 2013 Why am I willing to look less presentable than my female counterparts? Jul 25, 2013
- Jul 25, 2013 Are the machine guns really necessary? Jul 25, 2013
- Jul 24, 2013 Kissing a hippo Jul 24, 2013
- Jul 24, 2013 Quarter-Life Crisis? Jul 24, 2013
- Jul 23, 2013 Admirable ignorance Jul 23, 2013
- Jul 23, 2013 Want to tell a story at the next Speak Up? Jul 23, 2013
- Jul 23, 2013 Loves him some Pat the Bunny Jul 23, 2013
- Jul 23, 2013 Watch this instead. Please. You’ll be so happy that you did. Jul 23, 2013
- Jul 22, 2013 Which of these 6 things would you change about your spouse? Jul 22, 2013
- Jul 22, 2013 Future ethicist? Attorney? Negotiator? Either way, it’s trouble for me. Jul 22, 2013
- Jul 21, 2013 I saw evil at the newsstand. Jul 21, 2013
- Jul 21, 2013 Britain legalizes gay marriage thanks to the approval of their unelected, genetically appointed head of state. Jul 21, 2013
- Jul 20, 2013 Why I love storytelling, and why I especially love The Moth Jul 20, 2013
- Jul 19, 2013 Man wrestles shark. I’m not impressed. Jul 19, 2013
- Jul 19, 2013 Ironic at last. Jul 19, 2013
- Jul 18, 2013 To hell with the hedgehog. Jul 18, 2013
- Jul 18, 2013 Charlie’s words Jul 18, 2013
- Jul 17, 2013 Don’t like that woman’s skirt? Think that man looks ridiculous in shorts? Say something. Jul 17, 2013
- Jul 17, 2013 Inside Jaws: A Filmuentary Jul 17, 2013
- Jul 17, 2013 Bookish days of yore Jul 17, 2013
- Jul 16, 2013 We finished our anniversary in the negative Jul 16, 2013
- Jul 16, 2013 What happened to Fruity Pebbles? Jul 16, 2013
- Jul 15, 2013 99 reasons that I love Elysha Dicks Jul 15, 2013
- Jul 14, 2013 Now I have to worry about falling cows. Great. Jul 14, 2013
- Jul 14, 2013 Self-loathing and the cronut Jul 14, 2013
- Jul 13, 2013 The thread of melancholy is unavoidable for this parent Jul 13, 2013
- Jul 13, 2013 Girl Learns to Dance in a Year Jul 13, 2013
- Jul 12, 2013 First Twinkies return to the shelves. Now this. Jul 12, 2013
- Jul 12, 2013 Upcoming speaking engagements Jul 12, 2013
- Jul 11, 2013 My wife played an enormous role in my recent Moth StorySLAM victory. Here’s how. Jul 11, 2013
- Jul 10, 2013 You might want to throw away your bathrobe. Here's why. Jul 10, 2013
- Jul 10, 2013 More! Jul 10, 2013
- Jul 9, 2013 Another argument against the death penalty Jul 9, 2013
- Jul 9, 2013 Another Speak Up date added to the calendar Jul 9, 2013
- Jul 9, 2013 Stay calm. Jul 9, 2013
- Jul 8, 2013 Bare-breasted women are perfectly fine but Dicks was offensive? Jul 8, 2013
- Jul 8, 2013 My daughter loves butterflies and tarantulas. Jul 8, 2013
- Jul 7, 2013 When I started working as a wedding DJ in 1997, the world was damn near prehistoric. Jul 7, 2013
- Jul 6, 2013 The toughest question of the year Jul 6, 2013
- Jul 6, 2013 A lesson in bubbles Jul 6, 2013
- Jul 5, 2013 A pill that reduces the amount of sleep that a person needs? Blasphemy! Jul 5, 2013
- Jul 4, 2013 Anatomy of agreement Jul 4, 2013
- Jul 3, 2013 Where do you get your ideas? Jul 3, 2013
- Jul 3, 2013 An analysis of humor that will make you a funnier person Jul 3, 2013
- Jul 2, 2013 In 2014, I will wear a flesh-colored speedo in front of an audience of readers and talk about my books. Here’s why. Jul 2, 2013
- Jul 2, 2013 No kisses for Mommy Jul 2, 2013
- Jul 1, 2013 Unfair assumption #12: People who purchase and use amateur fireworks lack intelligence and do not value their fingers appropriately. Jul 1, 2013
- Jul 1, 2013 Resolution update: June 2013 Jul 1, 2013
June 2013
- Jun 30, 2013 13 things that make me happy Jun 30, 2013
- Jun 29, 2013 First marks Jun 29, 2013
- Jun 28, 2013 Sperm, sticks and downright douchebaggery Jun 28, 2013
- Jun 28, 2013 Father-son discussion Jun 28, 2013
- Jun 27, 2013 “In The Night Kitchen” relies on the penis for its success and notoriety. Jun 27, 2013
- Jun 26, 2013 In the wake of the Supreme Court’s DOMA ruling, I can’t help but accentuate the negative Jun 26, 2013
- Jun 26, 2013 Second place sucks. I am a jerk. Jun 26, 2013
- Jun 25, 2013 If only he could remain so agreeable Jun 25, 2013
- Jun 24, 2013 The Moth: Guys in Shower Jun 24, 2013
- Jun 24, 2013 Taking a stand against not taking a stand to avoid offending someone Jun 24, 2013
- Jun 23, 2013 A hard roll is actually soft. You probably knew that already, but I didn’t. Jun 23, 2013
- Jun 21, 2013 Fold a shirt in under 2 seconds Jun 21, 2013
- Jun 20, 2013 Beauty pageants must end now. Jun 20, 2013
- Jun 18, 2013 Literary perfection Jun 18, 2013
- Jun 18, 2013 I'm proud to say I've never done this. Or this. Or this. Jun 18, 2013
- Jun 17, 2013 The Moth: Call Me Dad Jun 17, 2013
- Jun 17, 2013 A mother’s nightgown teaches a woman a universal truth of life. Jun 17, 2013
- Jun 16, 2013 Wedding etiquette torn down by one of the most popular advice columnists in the world. I’m impressed. Jun 16, 2013
- Jun 15, 2013 The Three Little Pigs and Jose? Jun 15, 2013
- Jun 14, 2013 My advice: Listen to The Diary of Anne Frank on a 1995 Sony Walkman Jun 14, 2013
- Jun 14, 2013 I don’t love Star Trek, but this most recent Star Trek TELEVISION SHOW is amazing. Jun 14, 2013
- Jun 13, 2013 Unfair assumption #11: People who tell you that a tomato is actually a fruit are actually some of the most pedantic and annoying people on the planet. Jun 13, 2013
- Jun 13, 2013 The Moth: Two Fathers Jun 13, 2013
- Jun 13, 2013 107 Federal Street update Jun 13, 2013
- Jun 12, 2013 Love me a drive-in movie Jun 12, 2013
- Jun 11, 2013 Placing an engagement ring in food is stupid. Jun 11, 2013
- Jun 11, 2013 Chessboxing is an actual thing. If only it had been a thing in 1988. Jun 11, 2013
- Jun 10, 2013 The Moth: Parental Love in Absentia Jun 10, 2013
- Jun 10, 2013 The opening number of the 2013 Tony Awards was one of the most astounding performances I have ever seen. You must watch. Jun 10, 2013
- Jun 9, 2013 But I love my job! Jun 9, 2013
- Jun 8, 2013 Negotiator in training Jun 8, 2013
- Jun 8, 2013 What is your most outdated device? Jun 8, 2013
- Jun 7, 2013 The joy and panic of parenting in 60 seconds Jun 7, 2013
- Jun 6, 2013 The trouble with Star Wars is that it was historical fiction Jun 6, 2013
- Jun 5, 2013 A perfect couple Jun 5, 2013
- Jun 5, 2013 Should I try to be wrong? Jun 5, 2013
- Jun 4, 2013 “Dinosaurs lived with people” violates the basic human right of not being stupid. Jun 4, 2013
- Jun 4, 2013 Ducklings versus a speeding motorist Jun 4, 2013
- Jun 3, 2013 A perfect example of how my disputatious mind works Jun 3, 2013
- Jun 3, 2013 How To Be A Grownup In 10 Steps (revised) Jun 3, 2013
- Jun 2, 2013 Butterfly Kisses is not cheesy, damn it. Jun 2, 2013
- Jun 2, 2013 The bar for demonstrating support of my work has officially been set. Jun 2, 2013
- Jun 1, 2013 My arch nemesis and my wife are in cahoots. Jun 1, 2013
May 2013
- May 31, 2013 Charlie’s first meal May 31, 2013
- May 31, 2013 Resolution update: May 2013 May 31, 2013
- May 30, 2013 My biggest fan and my arch nemesis go on a date. It doesn’t turn out well. May 30, 2013
- May 30, 2013 Charlie’s first birthday May 30, 2013
- May 29, 2013 Summer Writing Academy: Anyone want in? May 29, 2013
- May 28, 2013 Writers are lucky. Not special. May 28, 2013
- May 27, 2013 There is a name brand on my zipper, and that is a problem. May 27, 2013
- May 26, 2013 Elysha the Audacious May 26, 2013
- May 26, 2013 My eleven year old publicist May 26, 2013
- May 25, 2013 Twinkle Twinkle cruelty May 25, 2013
- May 25, 2013 You need not travel far to see aliens May 25, 2013
- May 24, 2013 The secret of the first follower May 24, 2013
- May 24, 2013 The Office finale: Near perfect May 24, 2013
- May 23, 2013 My daughter wants to dance, but the dance recital machine sucks. What are we to do? May 23, 2013
- May 22, 2013 A victory at The Moth Boston May 22, 2013
- May 21, 2013 Even I haven’t made this golf shot yet. May 21, 2013
- May 20, 2013 “Book club date night” is probably not the most romantic way to spend an evening with your wife May 20, 2013
- May 19, 2013 Another Yes Man May 19, 2013
- May 19, 2013 Snoozing May 19, 2013
- May 18, 2013 My daughter has so little faith in me. May 18, 2013
- May 18, 2013 Unfair assumption #10: Americans who follow the machinations of the British royal family are stupid. May 18, 2013
- May 17, 2013 Good old days are now. Tomorrow, too. May 17, 2013
- May 16, 2013 The limited palate of an illogical toddler May 16, 2013
- May 15, 2013 Redefining the Author Appearance: Four Proposed Categories May 15, 2013
- May 15, 2013 There may be things that are fun to squeeze, but this umbrella ain’t one of them. May 15, 2013
- May 14, 2013 The secret to my success May 14, 2013
- May 14, 2013 Small victories on the golf course May 14, 2013
- May 13, 2013 How To Be A Grownup in 10 Steps May 13, 2013
- May 13, 2013 107 Federal Street back in business May 13, 2013
- May 13, 2013 Speak Up date announced! May 13, 2013
- May 12, 2013 I’m not spiteful. I’m “aggressively moralistic.” May 12, 2013
- May 12, 2013 The perfect Mother’s Day gift or the worst Mother’s Day gift of all time? I’m not sure. May 12, 2013
- May 11, 2013 Always re-configuring her environment May 11, 2013
- May 11, 2013 Jack’s magic beans have a better chance of working than this. May 11, 2013
- May 10, 2013 The two best pieces of writing advice that Roger Ebert ever received May 10, 2013
- May 10, 2013 Why you shouldn’t tell your kid to fight back May 10, 2013
- May 9, 2013 More like six percent May 9, 2013
- May 9, 2013 Spock versus Spock May 9, 2013
- May 8, 2013 Budo and Graham May 8, 2013
- May 8, 2013 Do racists long for the good old days? May 8, 2013
- May 7, 2013 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend: The paperback release May 7, 2013
- May 6, 2013 Speak Up: A recap of our first show May 6, 2013
- May 6, 2013 Deep thoughts on God, pets, holidays and the Internet: Ian Martin covers it all May 6, 2013
- May 5, 2013 Makes me smile every time May 5, 2013
- May 5, 2013 When was the last time you had a pillow fight? May 5, 2013
- May 4, 2013 Life lesson from a little one May 4, 2013
- May 3, 2013 I have not mastered disdain, and I hate myself for it. May 3, 2013
- May 2, 2013 Resolution update: April 2013 May 2, 2013
- May 1, 2013 Bigot? Hypocrite? Ignorant? All three? May 1, 2013
- May 1, 2013 I told me so. May 1, 2013
April 2013
- Apr 30, 2013 Parenting perfection Apr 30, 2013
- Apr 30, 2013 Is there be anything more tragic than a left handed kid stuck with a right handed baseball glove? Apr 30, 2013
- Apr 29, 2013 The $199.99 Wheelbarrow Sundae: Who is with me? Apr 29, 2013
- Apr 29, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Matthew Dicks Apr 29, 2013
- Apr 29, 2013 Spamming scumbag of the week: Phone Beauties Apr 29, 2013
- Apr 28, 2013 New definition of “pizza face” Apr 28, 2013
- Apr 28, 2013 Unfair assumption #9: Women who don makeup before heading to the gym are suffering from traumatic brain injury. Apr 28, 2013
- Apr 27, 2013 I wrote a poem. I need a critique. Please help. Apr 27, 2013
- Apr 27, 2013 Ann Coulter is racing me to the finish line. I hope she gets there first. Apr 27, 2013
- Apr 27, 2013 Television-free news Apr 27, 2013
- Apr 26, 2013 What are the chances that my wife will allow me to install these throughout the house? Apr 26, 2013
- Apr 26, 2013 Girl on the edge Apr 26, 2013
- Apr 25, 2013 “Come out! Come out! Wherever you are!” Apr 25, 2013
- Apr 25, 2013 A toddler bikini? I’m think I’m okay with that. A poorly written defense of the toddler bikini? I take great umbrage. Apr 25, 2013
- Apr 24, 2013 Dead boys sitting beside a pond Apr 24, 2013
- Apr 24, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Plato Karafelis Apr 24, 2013
- Apr 24, 2013 I can’t spell “Slow down.” Apr 24, 2013
- Apr 23, 2013 A book about sex that I should’ve written. Apr 23, 2013
- Apr 23, 2013 I was supposed to be writing… Apr 23, 2013
- Apr 22, 2013 Unscripted Star Wars genius Apr 22, 2013
- Apr 22, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Kim Damokosh Apr 22, 2013
- Apr 22, 2013 Love makes up for a lot. Apr 22, 2013
- Apr 21, 2013 The genius and insight of Dove is unparalleled Apr 21, 2013
- Apr 21, 2013 My middle school visit included a comparison to a Boston mobster, an accusation that I am old and time spent in the ladies restroom Apr 21, 2013
- Apr 20, 2013 Kid words for future characters Apr 20, 2013
- Apr 20, 2013 Dinosaur wrangler Apr 20, 2013
- Apr 19, 2013 The Moth: Science Fair Cheater Apr 19, 2013
- Apr 18, 2013 New best headline ever Apr 18, 2013
- Apr 18, 2013 Children swallowing poisoned beads was not my original plan. I swear. Apr 18, 2013
- Apr 18, 2013 Jumping out of a plane without a parachute is dangerous enough. Adding an additional layer of danger is just stupid. Apr 18, 2013
- Apr 17, 2013 The Kobo eReader: Better than paper? Probably not. But incredible. Apr 17, 2013
- Apr 17, 2013 I understand your pain, Beaver College. Apr 17, 2013
- Apr 17, 2013 It’s not actually “trouble” if all your boss did was yell at you. Apr 17, 2013
- Apr 16, 2013 The Moth: Charitable Contributions Apr 16, 2013
- Apr 16, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Ellen Painter Dollar Apr 16, 2013
- Apr 16, 2013 Spamming scumbag of the week Apr 16, 2013
- Apr 15, 2013 Random thoughts and observations from a weekend spent with authors and readers Apr 15, 2013
- Apr 14, 2013 Booktopia blurs the lines between author and reader. Apr 14, 2013
- Apr 14, 2013 Kmart is cool? Apr 14, 2013
- Apr 13, 2013 It begins with a love of the object Apr 13, 2013
- Apr 13, 2013 Just leave the bigots behind Apr 13, 2013
- Apr 12, 2013 My pants Apr 12, 2013
- Apr 11, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Rachel Leventhal-Weiner Apr 11, 2013
- Apr 11, 2013 Her pirate name would be Black Heart Apr 11, 2013
- Apr 10, 2013 A solution to the balancing of home and work Apr 10, 2013
- Apr 10, 2013 Bad news for cats and dogs and goldfish everywhere Apr 10, 2013
- Apr 9, 2013 The omnipresent coffee culture has officially jumped the shark Apr 9, 2013
- Apr 9, 2013 Fraggle Rock is obsessed with death Apr 9, 2013
- Apr 9, 2013 Ends badly Apr 9, 2013
- Apr 8, 2013 Raiders of the Lost Ark most overlooked flaw: Indiana Jones need not apply Apr 8, 2013
- Apr 8, 2013 Pixar’s bathroom. Eddie Van Halen’s M&Ms. Enough. We got it. Apr 8, 2013
- Apr 8, 2013 Baby needs a pillow Apr 8, 2013
- Apr 7, 2013 I am a library maker. Apr 7, 2013
- Apr 7, 2013 Spamming scumbags of the week Apr 7, 2013
- Apr 6, 2013 The greatest brownie spokesperson on the planet today Apr 6, 2013
- Apr 6, 2013 A hovercraft on a golf course: I officially live in the future. Apr 6, 2013
- Apr 5, 2013 People say the craziest things at author talks Apr 5, 2013
- Apr 5, 2013 I don’t stretch. I win. Apr 5, 2013
- Apr 4, 2013 First bagel Apr 4, 2013
- Apr 4, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: Okey Ndibe Apr 4, 2013
- Apr 4, 2013 Resolution update: March 2013 Apr 4, 2013
- Apr 3, 2013 Unacceptable platitude #4: "To each his own.” Apr 3, 2013
- Apr 2, 2013 How dare the Pope act so kindly or equitably Apr 2, 2013
- Apr 2, 2013 Our boy! Apr 2, 2013
- Apr 1, 2013 Two peas in a pod Apr 1, 2013
- Apr 1, 2013 Done. Apr 1, 2013
March 2013
- Mar 31, 2013 Spamming scumbag of the week Mar 31, 2013
- Mar 31, 2013 The essence of New England weather Mar 31, 2013
- Mar 30, 2013 Snooze button sucks Mar 30, 2013
- Mar 30, 2013 Worst super power ever Mar 30, 2013
- Mar 29, 2013 A question about female criticism that is likely to get me killed. Mar 29, 2013
- Mar 29, 2013 He’s nine months old! Mar 29, 2013
- Mar 29, 2013 Mystery of Prince Rupert’s Drop Mar 29, 2013
- Mar 28, 2013 Unprecedented sibling love (and the people who suck at life who want to spoil it) Mar 28, 2013
- Mar 28, 2013 An interview with my not-so-fictional character Mar 28, 2013
- Mar 28, 2013 Be different. But be prepared to suffer, despite what parents and teachers may tell you. Mar 28, 2013
- Mar 27, 2013 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend: Large print Mar 27, 2013
- Mar 27, 2013 Stupid people are still dangerous. Mar 27, 2013
- Mar 27, 2013 The $91,500 shirt is actually quite useful Mar 27, 2013
- Mar 26, 2013 It’s disgusting either way, but which is worse? Mar 26, 2013
- Mar 26, 2013 Do you want Kate Middleton’s nose? Mar 26, 2013
- Mar 25, 2013 Speak Up storyteller: James Bengiovanni Mar 25, 2013
- Mar 25, 2013 Was the destruction of the Death Star an inside job? Also, how did Luke Skywalker dodge the stigma of incest so easily? Mar 25, 2013
- Mar 25, 2013 WWMD (or maybe WWMDD) Mar 25, 2013
- Mar 24, 2013 The Matthew Dicks Law of Thank You Notes Mar 24, 2013
- Mar 24, 2013 In the world of gambling, this is what’s known as a parlay. Mar 24, 2013
- Mar 23, 2013 Little girl illogic Mar 23, 2013
- Mar 23, 2013 Hannah Horvath versus Walter White: Sometimes it has nothing to do with sex. Mar 23, 2013
- Mar 23, 2013 Nuclear bomb. Homemade timer. Mar 23, 2013
- Mar 22, 2013 Happy 70th anniversary Mar 22, 2013
- Mar 22, 2013 Do Not Read List Mar 22, 2013
- Mar 21, 2013 Standing up! First time! Mar 21, 2013
- Mar 21, 2013 I’m back. Mar 21, 2013
- Mar 18, 2013 I invited Bill Clinton and Oprah to our wedding. Their response was not surprising. Mar 18, 2013
- Mar 18, 2013 The bogeyman goes straight. But he’s still a bogeyman to me. Mar 18, 2013
- Mar 17, 2013 Two favorite songs? Is that even possible? Mar 17, 2013
- Mar 17, 2013 I was forced to parent like a lunatic for a night. It wasn’t pretty. Mar 17, 2013
- Mar 16, 2013 Competitive, creative to-do listing: Which do you think is best? Mar 16, 2013
- Mar 16, 2013 Mommy and Charlie clapping Mar 16, 2013
- Mar 15, 2013 The birth of Something Missing: Aimee Mann's theory on creativity matches my own perfectly Mar 15, 2013
- Mar 15, 2013 Multitasking gone bad Mar 15, 2013
- Mar 14, 2013 The Matthew Dicks Pre-Obituary Contest (including fabulous prizes for the winner) Mar 14, 2013
- Mar 14, 2013 Three-trick Charlie Mar 14, 2013
- Mar 13, 2013 Family motto inspired and then rejected Mar 13, 2013
- Mar 13, 2013 A weaponized TV capable of melting metal Mar 13, 2013
- Mar 12, 2013 The definition of silly. Mar 12, 2013
- Mar 11, 2013 Paperback cover! Mar 11, 2013
- Mar 11, 2013 It’s not backwards. It’s fashion forward. Mar 11, 2013
- Mar 10, 2013 Please settle a bet between my wife and me: Did you ever walked the railroad tracks at least once as a child? Mar 10, 2013
- Mar 10, 2013 J.Crew Crew Mar 10, 2013
- Mar 9, 2013 I love it when deserving people are made to look stupid. Mar 9, 2013
- Mar 9, 2013 Luckiest man on the planet Mar 9, 2013
- Mar 8, 2013 Don’t call yourself old Mar 8, 2013
- Mar 8, 2013 A future protagonist, perhaps. Mar 8, 2013
- Mar 7, 2013 Speak Up: True Stories. Real People. Mar 7, 2013
- Mar 7, 2013 Best basketball shot ever Mar 7, 2013
- Mar 6, 2013 The Matthew Dicks Treatise on Humility Mar 6, 2013
- Mar 6, 2013 Do you know anyone who smokes? Mar 6, 2013
- Mar 5, 2013 Grandfather-in-training Mar 5, 2013
- Mar 5, 2013 No two snowflakes (or cows) are alike is bunk Mar 5, 2013
- Mar 4, 2013 Call me an imbecile all you want. Just leave these particular fathers alone, lest we hurt their feelings and make them cry. Mar 4, 2013
- Mar 4, 2013 Some things are better left unsaid Mar 4, 2013
- Mar 3, 2013 I abandoned the Catholic Church at the age of seven. Credit my Catholic mother. Mar 3, 2013
- Mar 3, 2013 Best moment Mar 3, 2013
- Mar 2, 2013 Future game show host? Mar 2, 2013
- Mar 2, 2013 Nineteenth century women did some insane things in the pursuit of beauty. But the modern woman is a hell of a lot crazier. Mar 2, 2013
- Mar 1, 2013 The future of publishing Mar 1, 2013
- Mar 1, 2013 Resolution update: February 2013 Mar 1, 2013
February 2013
- Feb 28, 2013 Wife and daughter are capable of even making The Moth better. Feb 28, 2013
- Feb 28, 2013 Football is better than fashion, even if both are inane. Feb 28, 2013
- Feb 27, 2013 When do I write? In the cracks between my toddler’s poops and my wife’s contractions. Feb 27, 2013
- Feb 26, 2013 Dicks serves a purpose Feb 26, 2013
- Feb 26, 2013 There are no easy answers when it comes to video games and violence. Nor is the research on the issue settled. Feb 26, 2013
- Feb 25, 2013 Baby talk Feb 25, 2013
- Feb 25, 2013 The twenty-first century is such a tough time to be alive. Feb 25, 2013
- Feb 24, 2013 What motivates me? Feb 24, 2013
- Feb 24, 2013 Government with a splash of humor Feb 24, 2013
- Feb 23, 2013 A easy-to-implement, nearly-free, must-steal idea for libraries and bookstores everywhere: Blind Date with a Book Feb 23, 2013
- Feb 23, 2013 Rarely have I seen such a blend of hope and tragedy Feb 23, 2013
- Feb 22, 2013 A demanding public Feb 22, 2013
- Feb 22, 2013 The postnuptial agreement: A new method of marital negotiation. An even better indicator of people who need to repeat kindergarten. Feb 22, 2013
- Feb 21, 2013 My wife’s only parenting blunder involves the potentially hazardous use of scissors. Feb 21, 2013
- Feb 21, 2013 One reason to hope for more rain Feb 21, 2013
- Feb 20, 2013 The old man is not a choreographer or dance instructor, regardless of what my daughter would have you believe. Feb 20, 2013
- Feb 20, 2013 Faking your own death as part of the proposal? Exchanging vows via Twitter? Strange, but still better than this. Feb 20, 2013
- Feb 19, 2013 Not three. Look closely. Five. Feb 19, 2013
- Feb 19, 2013 No social media. No bling. Just friends. Feb 19, 2013
- Feb 18, 2013 USA versus UK Feb 18, 2013
- Feb 18, 2013 Three reasons I don’t ski. I also avoid cocaine and Angry Birds for similar reasons. Feb 18, 2013
- Feb 17, 2013 Based upon this year’s birthday gifts, I’m much more mature than I was two years ago. Feb 17, 2013
- Feb 17, 2013 Thanks. Ouch. Feb 17, 2013
- Feb 16, 2013 The search for the perfect handbag instead uncovers a small herd of vapid, mindless, disgusting sheep. Feb 16, 2013
- Feb 16, 2013 Which came first? The chicken or the egg? Feb 16, 2013
- Feb 15, 2013 Creepy doll babysitting my son Feb 15, 2013
- Feb 15, 2013 Are the lessons learned by working your way through college worth the cost? Feb 15, 2013
- Feb 14, 2013 Lessons learned from my McDonald’s career Feb 14, 2013
- Feb 14, 2013 Making people laugh is supposed to be hard work. Feb 14, 2013
- Feb 13, 2013 Immoveable object versus unstoppable force Feb 13, 2013
- Feb 13, 2013 More sibling love Feb 13, 2013
- Feb 12, 2013 Science supports my wife’s hatred of cilantro and my hatred of broccoli, but she has more credibility than me in food related issues. Unfairly so. Feb 12, 2013
- Feb 12, 2013 The person with the highest standards should not automatically be awarded the moral high ground Feb 12, 2013
- Feb 11, 2013 Henry! Feb 11, 2013
- Feb 10, 2013 Politics of Competitive Board Gaming Among Friends Feb 10, 2013
- Feb 10, 2013 Sticking the in-laws in an elaborate doghouse just might be the perfect solution Feb 10, 2013
- Feb 10, 2013 Time is entirely subjective. Just ask a toddler who has been asked to wait one minute. Feb 10, 2013
- Feb 9, 2013 Before you start thinking that this storm is anything like ‘78… Feb 9, 2013
- Feb 9, 2013 The end of wet dog smell is just the beginning Feb 9, 2013
- Feb 8, 2013 Don’t eat the poor lobster. Feb 8, 2013
- Feb 7, 2013 Gold diggers begone! Feb 7, 2013
- Feb 6, 2013 Should I hope that my children struggle as much as I did? Feb 6, 2013
- Feb 5, 2013 She loved me first for my storytelling Feb 5, 2013
- Feb 5, 2013 Save money. Choose only imaginary friends. Feb 5, 2013
- Feb 4, 2013 My children make me a lesser man Feb 4, 2013
- Feb 4, 2013 The $20,000 Pyramid book club Feb 4, 2013
- Feb 3, 2013 I’m an Elizabeth Bennet. Feb 3, 2013
- Feb 3, 2013 Sibling adoration Feb 3, 2013
- Feb 2, 2013 The majesty and utility of the Baby Mum Mum Feb 2, 2013
- Feb 2, 2013 My daughter’s favorite library is not a library Feb 2, 2013
- Feb 1, 2013 Recent editorial comments Feb 1, 2013
- Feb 1, 2013 Brazil seeks to increase intelligence by banning indoor tanning. At least that’s my guess. Feb 1, 2013
- Feb 1, 2013 Sibling cuddles Feb 1, 2013
January 2013
- Jan 31, 2013 Resolution update: January 2013 Jan 31, 2013
- Jan 31, 2013 So little Jan 31, 2013
- Jan 30, 2013 A perfect summation of me. Jan 30, 2013
- Jan 30, 2013 Slightly hazardous play makes a birthday party great. Jan 30, 2013
- Jan 29, 2013 My latest and greatest gift idea is one that I think everyone could embrace Jan 29, 2013
- Jan 29, 2013 No Moth, but a silver lining. Probably too generous. Not quite silver. More like chrome. Jan 29, 2013
- Jan 28, 2013 Previous me. Jan 28, 2013
- Jan 28, 2013 Octopussy Jan 28, 2013
- Jan 27, 2013 Amazon’s new policy on book reviews did not impact me thanks to the quality of my friends and family. Jan 27, 2013
- Jan 27, 2013 My daughter’s first day Jan 27, 2013
- Jan 26, 2013 Best of 2013 Jan 26, 2013
- Jan 26, 2013 Imaginary friends make cheap dates Jan 26, 2013
- Jan 25, 2013 Four years old today! Jan 25, 2013
- Jan 25, 2013 Imaginary friends selling cars Jan 25, 2013
- Jan 25, 2013 Clara’s infamous Christmas Day poop Jan 25, 2013
- Jan 24, 2013 Guys as friends Jan 24, 2013
- Jan 24, 2013 They can’t win. At least when the critics are stupid. Jan 24, 2013
- Jan 23, 2013 Christmas morning. Unwrapped presents still under the tree. Discussion on the nature of 13. Jan 23, 2013
- Jan 23, 2013 I wonder if his children’s book is nearly as impenetrable as his adult fiction. Jan 23, 2013
- Jan 22, 2013 There is always a reason for an imaginary friend Jan 22, 2013
- Jan 22, 2013 Storytelling coming to Connecticut! Save the date! Jan 22, 2013
- Jan 21, 2013 Making a defeat look like a win Jan 21, 2013
- Jan 21, 2013 Best Christmas morning words ever spoken Jan 21, 2013
- Jan 20, 2013 It’s ironic, damn it. Or close enough. Jan 20, 2013
- Jan 20, 2013 The Wizard of Oz versus Star Wars Jan 20, 2013
- Jan 19, 2013 The most baffling part about the North Korean government is their inability to lie well. Jan 19, 2013
- Jan 19, 2013 The Flogsta Scream: Creepy and bizarre but I kind of love it. Jan 19, 2013
- Jan 18, 2013 Sorry, kid. Easy Bake Ovens are pink for good reason. Jan 18, 2013
- Jan 18, 2013 We need a lot more of super model Cameron Russell, but not for the reasons you’d expect. Jan 18, 2013
- Jan 17, 2013 The epilogue Jan 17, 2013
- Jan 17, 2013 My son is not a USB device Jan 17, 2013
- Jan 16, 2013 So I guess there’s no practical use for the word then… Jan 16, 2013
- Jan 16, 2013 I might’ve married this guy if given the chance Jan 16, 2013
- Jan 15, 2013 Lessons and observations from a week of The Clowns. Jan 15, 2013
- Jan 15, 2013 This is why I hate leaving for work. Jan 15, 2013
- Jan 14, 2013 First snowman Jan 14, 2013
- Jan 14, 2013 The rebels haven’t gone anywhere. They just suck now. Jan 14, 2013
- Jan 13, 2013 Author Jarrett Krosoczka wins over my students in less than 20 minutes. I’m STILL trying to win them over. Jan 13, 2013
- Jan 13, 2013 My new favorite person in the world Jan 13, 2013
- Jan 12, 2013 My children absolutely adore each other. If you feel the need to tell me it won’t last forever, shut the hell up. Jan 12, 2013
- Jan 11, 2013 Best photos ever (from an author’s perspective) Jan 11, 2013
- Jan 11, 2013 The reason why soda drinkers are more depressed than coffee drinkers is obvious. Jan 11, 2013
- Jan 10, 2013 He must be thinking about the upcoming Patriots playoff game Jan 10, 2013
- Jan 10, 2013 Resolutions that didn’t make the 2013 list Jan 10, 2013
- Jan 10, 2013 The math lesson on Christmas morning was not my idea. I swear. Jan 10, 2013
- Jan 9, 2013 Best use of duct tape ever Jan 9, 2013
- Jan 9, 2013 This is not possible. Jan 9, 2013
- Jan 9, 2013 Why do I use Twitter? Because I am a reader first. Jan 9, 2013
- Jan 8, 2013 Is this a new and innovative way of writing a novel, or am I simply being stupid again? Jan 8, 2013
- Jan 8, 2013 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend: German Jan 8, 2013
- Jan 7, 2013 What did Olivia do this time? Jan 7, 2013
- Jan 6, 2013 I never know what I’m actually writing about Jan 6, 2013
- Jan 6, 2013 Kurt Cobain and Budo (and Boodah) Jan 6, 2013
- Jan 5, 2013 Opening night for The Clowns! And perhaps a new way of writing fiction? Jan 5, 2013
- Jan 4, 2013 I miss my family. Jan 4, 2013
- Jan 3, 2013 My hairdresser and I are not brother and sister. We just don’t like small talk. Jan 3, 2013
- Jan 3, 2013 I’m not anti-feminist. I just don’t like stupid. Jan 3, 2013
- Jan 2, 2013 New Year's resolutions: 2013 Jan 2, 2013
- Jan 2, 2013 My 2012 Christmas haul Jan 2, 2013
- Jan 1, 2013 Resolution update: 2012 in review Jan 1, 2013
December 2012
- Dec 31, 2012 My secret wish for 2013 is for Comic Sans Dec 31, 2012
- Dec 31, 2012 This girl does not look three Dec 31, 2012
- Dec 30, 2012 Mr. Boo Dec 30, 2012
- Dec 30, 2012 Overdressed or underdressed? Dec 30, 2012
- Dec 29, 2012 Outsourcing my New Year’s resolutions again: Would you like to play a role? Dec 29, 2012
- Dec 29, 2012 Lessons from my third Moth victory Dec 29, 2012
- Dec 29, 2012 Charity sucks. At least in this instance. Dec 29, 2012
- Dec 28, 2012 Black and gross Dec 28, 2012
- Dec 27, 2012 My most useless super power Dec 27, 2012
- Dec 27, 2012 Woodstock’s quandary Dec 27, 2012
- Dec 26, 2012 Food Nazis Dec 26, 2012
- Dec 26, 2012 Fat employees receive fewer benefits at Whole Foods Dec 26, 2012
- Dec 26, 2012 Charlie Brown’s close encounter Dec 26, 2012
- Dec 25, 2012 Strangest Christmas behavior ever. Right? Dec 25, 2012
- Dec 25, 2012 First peas Dec 25, 2012
- Dec 24, 2012 A tree is dead. A little girl whispers to the survivors. A family rejoices with chocolate. Dec 24, 2012
- Dec 24, 2012 Poltergeists and an actual house fire Dec 24, 2012
- Dec 23, 2012 Poltergeists and house fires Dec 23, 2012
- Dec 23, 2012 Parents can be awful and despicable to their adult children. I will not be one of them. Dec 23, 2012
- Dec 23, 2012 Happy endings only please. Dec 23, 2012
- Dec 22, 2012 Father and son in Shakespeare Dec 22, 2012
- Dec 22, 2012 Not a fan of Santa Claus Dec 22, 2012
- Dec 21, 2012 Weaponized brownies Dec 21, 2012
- Dec 21, 2012 Dicks could have spared humiliation had they been born in Denmark Dec 21, 2012
- Dec 21, 2012 Joy and cheer indeed! Dec 21, 2012
- Dec 20, 2012 Awkward questions about sex, underwear, my mental health and my tax return. Dec 20, 2012
- Dec 20, 2012 So much for skipping Dec 20, 2012
- Dec 20, 2012 New Year’s resolution failure Dec 20, 2012
- Dec 19, 2012 Judgmental wrapping jerkface Dec 19, 2012
- Dec 19, 2012 Spidermen everywhere Dec 19, 2012
- Dec 18, 2012 Miss me, damn it. Dec 18, 2012
- Dec 18, 2012 Gender equality doesn’t always make good business sense Dec 18, 2012
- Dec 17, 2012 My newfound writing hero Dec 17, 2012
- Dec 17, 2012 What should I think about this? Dec 17, 2012
- Dec 16, 2012 Best words spoken by anyone anywhere anytime ever Dec 16, 2012
- Dec 16, 2012 Flower Dec 16, 2012
- Dec 15, 2012 Paleontologist? Astronomer? Dec 15, 2012
- Dec 15, 2012 Dancing beyond imagination Dec 15, 2012
- Dec 14, 2012 Baby Dragon Dec 14, 2012
- Dec 14, 2012 Just in case you were still questioning the existence of climate change… Dec 14, 2012
- Dec 13, 2012 A holiday gift idea that is unusual, renewable, charitable and might gleefully annoy the materialistic moron in your life. Dec 13, 2012
- Dec 13, 2012 "I stole, cheated and made fires." Dec 13, 2012
- Dec 12, 2012 The “I told you so” calendar is rooted in rhetoric. Its apparent pettiness is simply an unexpected byproduct. Dec 12, 2012
- Dec 12, 2012 She dances like her mother Dec 12, 2012
- Dec 11, 2012 A touch of OCD perhaps? Dec 11, 2012
- Dec 10, 2012 Who am I to deny my daughter this female rite of passage? Dec 10, 2012
- Dec 9, 2012 The definition of taking yourself way too seriously Dec 9, 2012
- Dec 9, 2012 I guess I’m stuck with Elysha forever Dec 9, 2012
- Dec 8, 2012 The bacon coffin. Also real. Dec 8, 2012
- Dec 8, 2012 A hell of a lot of toilet Dec 8, 2012
- Dec 7, 2012 The gravitas of a three-year-old Dec 7, 2012
- Dec 7, 2012 Aliens would zap us for this. Dec 7, 2012
- Dec 7, 2012 He looks like he knows more than he’s willing to admit. Dec 7, 2012
- Dec 6, 2012 Shut up, Torie Bosch. Dec 6, 2012
- Dec 6, 2012 Parenting made easy Dec 6, 2012
- Dec 5, 2012 Most unbelievable trade in the history of mankind. This is not hyperbole. Dec 5, 2012
- Dec 5, 2012 She must hate these people Dec 5, 2012
- Dec 4, 2012 For the consummate Patriots fan Dec 4, 2012
- Dec 4, 2012 I really don’t need my daughter questioning my abilities as a provider Dec 4, 2012
- Dec 3, 2012 Frightened Dec 3, 2012
- Dec 3, 2012 Why our Thanksgiving Day table was better than Whole Foods will ever be. Dec 3, 2012
- Dec 2, 2012 This is real. Frighteningly, horrifyingly, disgustingly real. Dec 2, 2012
- Dec 2, 2012 Affirmation from a Moth audience is unbelievable. Affirmation from a bunch of kids is damn good, too. Dec 2, 2012
- Dec 1, 2012 I adore authenticity, even when it hurts Dec 1, 2012
- Dec 1, 2012 The smell of breakfast whilst you shave Dec 1, 2012
- Dec 1, 2012 Little girl engineers Dec 1, 2012
November 2012
- Nov 30, 2012 Progress with a painful price Nov 30, 2012
- Nov 30, 2012 I’m going to be quite grumpy in my old age Nov 30, 2012
- Nov 29, 2012 Tell me everything? I’d rather you stick a fork in my eye. Nov 29, 2012
- Nov 29, 2012 I may have played the last round of golf in my life, except I didn't because I have no intention of ever dying. Again. Nov 29, 2012
- Nov 28, 2012 Unfair assumption #8: The grown men in the audience of the Glee: The 3D Concert Movie are not friendship material for me. Nov 28, 2012
- Nov 27, 2012 The power and ubiquity of the Twitter Nov 27, 2012
- Nov 26, 2012 Consistency, people. Nov 26, 2012
- Nov 25, 2012 You’re Whole Nov 25, 2012
- Nov 25, 2012 I like you Nov 25, 2012
- Nov 24, 2012 Unfair assumption #7: People who fight over merchandise in Walmart on Black Friday are clearly the scum of the Earth. Nov 24, 2012
- Nov 24, 2012 I have no idea where I bought this sweater, and I have no idea why you even care. Nov 24, 2012
- Nov 23, 2012 Shake Shake Shake. Nov 23, 2012
- Nov 22, 2012 Fast food at a glacial pace Nov 22, 2012
- Nov 21, 2012 The first supper Nov 21, 2012
- Nov 21, 2012 The most interesting question ever asked of me at a book talk and other notes from my recent appearance in Leverett, Massachusetts Nov 21, 2012
- Nov 20, 2012 Dumb Ways to Die Nov 20, 2012
- Nov 19, 2012 They left their bookstores behind. Nov 19, 2012
- Nov 19, 2012 A clear and honest accounting of the national debt in just three minutes Nov 19, 2012
- Nov 18, 2012 Not all grown up yet Nov 18, 2012
- Nov 18, 2012 The playbill! Nov 18, 2012
- Nov 17, 2012 I am nothing compared to Gramps. Nov 17, 2012
- Nov 17, 2012 Space is suddenly a lot less impressive Nov 17, 2012
- Nov 16, 2012 Six perfect words that killed me. Nov 16, 2012
- Nov 16, 2012 My wife was right. You were right. But I was a little right, too. Nov 16, 2012
- Nov 16, 2012 Why brushing your teeth is important Nov 16, 2012
- Nov 15, 2012 I say this is a clever verbal strategy for identifying stupidity. My wife says I’m mean and wrong. Settle the debate. Nov 15, 2012
- Nov 14, 2012 Why nudity sucks and should be avoided at all costs Nov 14, 2012
- Nov 14, 2012 My wife and children are ruining football for me. Nov 14, 2012
- Nov 13, 2012 Unfair assumption #6: If you have your own diamond guy, there is little chance that we could ever be friends. Nov 13, 2012
- Nov 13, 2012 Three reasons why helium balloons suck Nov 13, 2012
- Nov 12, 2012 My toddler is a crack addict. Even worse, your Amber Alert system is still operating in 1997. Nov 12, 2012
- Nov 12, 2012 Your North Face is a your coat, moron. Nov 12, 2012
- Nov 11, 2012 I chose not to become a professional cuddler Nov 11, 2012
- Nov 11, 2012 I’m in complete agreement with Johnny Rotten Nov 11, 2012
- Nov 10, 2012 The perfect apron for those who support vegetables by not eating them. Nov 10, 2012
- Nov 10, 2012 One percent of stupidity Nov 10, 2012
- Nov 9, 2012 I'm honest about my stupidity simply because I'm stupid more often than most. Nov 9, 2012
- Nov 9, 2012 Girl on horse Nov 9, 2012
- Nov 8, 2012 Bloomingdale’s sucks. Whole Foods does not. Nov 8, 2012
- Nov 8, 2012 Save the date Nov 8, 2012
- Nov 7, 2012 My fictional relationships with women Nov 7, 2012
- Nov 6, 2012 Why I chose not to vote today and then did anyway. Nov 6, 2012
- Nov 6, 2012 A correction, an explanation, an inexplicable bit of British advice and a forgotten ferret Nov 6, 2012
- Nov 5, 2012 Introduction conundrum Nov 5, 2012
- Nov 5, 2012 Small world indeed. Nov 5, 2012
- Nov 5, 2012 Nuzzle! Nov 5, 2012
- Nov 3, 2012 Unfair assumption #5: People who back into parking spots are at best irrational and more likely insane. Nov 3, 2012
- Nov 2, 2012 Unfair assumption #4: Men who own ferrets are immature and likely unemployable. Nov 2, 2012
- Nov 2, 2012 More ways to die Nov 2, 2012
- Nov 1, 2012 If you haven’t met my wife and daughter yet, wait five minutes. It’ll happen. I promise. Nov 1, 2012
- Nov 1, 2012 40 years late, jerk face. Nov 1, 2012
October 2012
- Oct 31, 2012 That is not a chicken, damn it. Oct 31, 2012
- Oct 31, 2012 Ann Kingman and Michael Kindness Oct 31, 2012
- Oct 30, 2012 Five months old today! Oct 30, 2012
- Oct 30, 2012 This may not make her the coolest kid in high school Oct 30, 2012
- Oct 30, 2012 Bad Internet Oct 30, 2012
- Oct 30, 2012 Some of my favorite things Oct 30, 2012
- Oct 29, 2012 The Nipple Bra is further proof that it wasn’t entirely my parents’ fault. Oct 29, 2012
- Oct 29, 2012 A dog ate my book. Oct 29, 2012
- Oct 28, 2012 Overstated Oct 28, 2012
- Oct 28, 2012 Worst barcode placement ever Oct 28, 2012
- Oct 28, 2012 Real men don’t use umbrellas, but if we did… Oct 28, 2012
- Oct 27, 2012 Our little dinosaur Oct 27, 2012
- Oct 27, 2012 Bunk Oct 27, 2012
- Oct 26, 2012 Early morning walk in my underwear Oct 26, 2012
- Oct 26, 2012 My three year old is attempting to take control of my clothing choices. And succeeding. Oct 26, 2012
- Oct 25, 2012 Sexist? I initially thought so, but now I am not so sure. Oct 25, 2012
- Oct 25, 2012 Is is unreasonable to expect my daughter to cure cancer or fly to Mars someday? Oct 25, 2012
- Oct 24, 2012 Cardboard boxes rule Oct 24, 2012
- Oct 23, 2012 Read Shakespeare and avoid children’s theater Oct 23, 2012
- Oct 23, 2012 I am not a member of Crystal Method. Oct 23, 2012
- Oct 22, 2012 Hop on Pop indeed Oct 22, 2012
- Oct 22, 2012 The dashboard is no place to roll back technology in favor of tradition Oct 22, 2012
- Oct 21, 2012 Never doubt a librarian Oct 21, 2012
- Oct 21, 2012 An old friend returns Oct 21, 2012
- Oct 21, 2012 My million dollar deal Oct 21, 2012
- Oct 21, 2012 I think she’s in a boat. Oct 21, 2012
- Oct 20, 2012 Sibling love Oct 20, 2012
- Oct 20, 2012 Reverse napping: Science says yes. Oct 20, 2012
- Oct 19, 2012 Editor, wife, daughter, Baby Kitty and The Beatles Oct 19, 2012
- Oct 19, 2012 Bike helmets suck Oct 19, 2012
- Oct 17, 2012 My crazy ideas aren’t so crazy after all. Oct 17, 2012
- Oct 17, 2012 Notes from the Brattleboro Literary Festival Oct 17, 2012
- Oct 17, 2012 Simple pleasures Oct 17, 2012
- Oct 16, 2012 Dead and dead but still breathing Oct 16, 2012
- Oct 16, 2012 A minute of infant cuteness Oct 16, 2012
- Oct 15, 2012 Best advice Oct 15, 2012
- Oct 15, 2012 She likes a little story Oct 15, 2012
- Oct 14, 2012 First family game night! Oct 14, 2012
- Oct 13, 2012 Skipping Oct 13, 2012
- Oct 13, 2012 Smiles for rainy day Oct 13, 2012
- Oct 12, 2012 This is the single greatest technological achievement in all of human history. Oct 12, 2012
- Oct 12, 2012 Eliminate your commute Oct 12, 2012
- Oct 12, 2012 Spite is right Oct 12, 2012
- Oct 11, 2012 Sibling adoration Oct 11, 2012
- Oct 11, 2012 A perfect delineation of the differences between the parties Oct 11, 2012
- Oct 11, 2012 The Simpson’s opening credits in real life Oct 11, 2012
- Oct 10, 2012 Best first sentence for a new story ever Oct 10, 2012
- Oct 10, 2012 The Reverse Nap Oct 10, 2012
- Oct 9, 2012 Plans for the weekend? Why not join me, Jane Yolen and Stuart O’Nan for something I don’t entirely understand. Oct 9, 2012
- Oct 9, 2012 Plants can smell. Plants can see. Now plants are capable of evading predators and determining friend from foe. Oct 9, 2012
- Oct 8, 2012 Background TV sucks. It turns out it’s bad for kids, too. But mostly it sucks. Oct 8, 2012
- Oct 7, 2012 The Dutch cover of MEMOIRS OF AN IMAGINARY FRIEND is unlike any so far. Oct 7, 2012
- Oct 7, 2012 Add this to my job list. Not this. Oct 7, 2012
- Oct 6, 2012 The Italians love Budo Oct 6, 2012
- Oct 5, 2012 The three day, three month, three year test Oct 5, 2012
- Oct 5, 2012 She is her father’s daughter Oct 5, 2012
- Oct 4, 2012 Pick a career, damn it. Or ten. Oct 4, 2012
- Oct 3, 2012 I am sick. I am going to work. I am stupid. Oct 3, 2012
- Oct 3, 2012 Brave as hell Oct 3, 2012
- Oct 2, 2012 Dancing with the ladies Oct 2, 2012
- Oct 2, 2012 A freakin’ superhero Oct 2, 2012
- Oct 1, 2012 Unfair assumption #3: People who watch television shows like The Jersey Shore must be morons. Oct 1, 2012
- Oct 1, 2012 Public opinion is irrelevant when it comes to matters of right and wrong Oct 1, 2012
- Oct 1, 2012 Please tell me that this will last forever Oct 1, 2012
September 2012
- Sep 30, 2012 You look terrible, and I think it’s great. Sep 30, 2012
- Sep 30, 2012 Creepy food Sep 30, 2012
- Sep 29, 2012 Dude Sep 29, 2012
- Sep 29, 2012 No more “penis” Sep 29, 2012
- Sep 29, 2012 My wife’s 5 least favorite things Sep 29, 2012
- Sep 28, 2012 There may only be 27 reasons to be grateful for living now Sep 28, 2012
- Sep 28, 2012 It seems fairly obvious but perhaps it’s not: You can’t “become” rich if you’re already rich. Sep 28, 2012
- Sep 28, 2012 Reindeer cake Sep 28, 2012
- Sep 27, 2012 I’d rather be lucky than be dead. Sep 27, 2012
- Sep 27, 2012 Should children be permitted to attend funerals? Sep 27, 2012
- Sep 26, 2012 My daughter does not like chicken but is an apparent medical expert Sep 26, 2012
- Sep 26, 2012 Ninjas to the rescue. Seriously. Sep 26, 2012
- Sep 25, 2012 Little girl in her big girl bed Sep 25, 2012
- Sep 25, 2012 Unfair assumption #2: Smokers are not as smart as nonsmokers. Sep 25, 2012
- Sep 24, 2012 Two new clinical studies find something that everyone already knew Sep 24, 2012
- Sep 24, 2012 Another fan of Charlie’s feet Sep 24, 2012
- Sep 23, 2012 My unglamorous self Sep 23, 2012
- Sep 23, 2012 Adoption in exchange for a kidney would have been a viable option, at least for a while Sep 23, 2012
- Sep 22, 2012 First laughs Sep 22, 2012
- Sep 21, 2012 Killing machines Sep 21, 2012
- Sep 21, 2012 Italians did good. Sep 21, 2012
- Sep 20, 2012 That man from Nantucket is seriously profane. Sep 20, 2012
- Sep 20, 2012 Unfair assumption #1: The larger a man’s watch, the smaller his personal sense of self worth. Sep 20, 2012
- Sep 19, 2012 Every time you watch this video, you’ll see something new. Sep 19, 2012
- Sep 19, 2012 Gift giving is not supposed to be an opportunity to show us how special you are. Sep 19, 2012
- Sep 18, 2012 Caine’s Arcade is back with an equally joyous follow-up story Sep 18, 2012
- Sep 18, 2012 I refuse to give the high school jerks a free pass, regardless of conventional wisdom Sep 18, 2012
- Sep 17, 2012 We won that game three separate times, and then we lost. Sep 17, 2012
- Sep 16, 2012 30 real reasons to be grateful for living Sep 16, 2012
- Sep 15, 2012 Just admit that you think homosexuality is yucky. Don’t drag religion into it. Sep 15, 2012
- Sep 15, 2012 The boy loves his name Sep 15, 2012
- Sep 14, 2012 I don’t care about fairness as long as no one is being harmed in the process. Sep 14, 2012
- Sep 13, 2012 Marriage deconstruction tool Sep 13, 2012
- Sep 13, 2012 Quite the magician Sep 13, 2012
- Sep 13, 2012 Owning a Canadian would be awesome. Sep 13, 2012
- Sep 12, 2012 I think I have a sad story to tell. Sep 12, 2012
- Sep 12, 2012 We did not need science to tell us that sleep training your child is the right thing to do. Sep 12, 2012
- Sep 11, 2012 A teacher’s memory of 9/11 Sep 11, 2012
- Sep 11, 2012 This is not a nap Sep 11, 2012
- Sep 10, 2012 The boy apparently loves patty-cake Sep 10, 2012
- Sep 10, 2012 Brace yourself. Sep 10, 2012
- Sep 9, 2012 Unrequited love Sep 9, 2012
- Sep 9, 2012 So much nuance in just 30 seconds of bigotry Sep 9, 2012
- Sep 8, 2012 My boyhood adventure land Sep 8, 2012
- Sep 8, 2012 The many faces of Charlie Sep 8, 2012
- Sep 7, 2012 The Internet makes it a very small world Sep 7, 2012
- Sep 7, 2012 Amazing or amazingly awful? Sep 7, 2012
- Sep 6, 2012 My little girl playing football? Sep 6, 2012
- Sep 6, 2012 Gumby and me in the HOV Sep 6, 2012
- Sep 5, 2012 Clint Eastwood’s Imaginary Friend was really his convenient friend Sep 5, 2012
- Sep 5, 2012 Best race of 2012 without exception Sep 5, 2012
- Sep 5, 2012 I’m not afraid. Sep 5, 2012
- Sep 4, 2012 The Open and Close Eyes Game Sep 4, 2012
- Sep 4, 2012 A message I try to drill into my students every single day Sep 4, 2012
- Sep 4, 2012 Tickets prices and fatherhood are not the reasons that I see fewer movies today Sep 4, 2012
- Sep 3, 2012 Unnecessary repetition. Wasted opportunity. Sep 3, 2012
- Sep 3, 2012 A stinging barb and a hint of underwear were my undoing Sep 3, 2012
- Sep 2, 2012 I could’ve been selling magic spells for years Sep 2, 2012
- Sep 2, 2012 Crying over spilled milk Sep 2, 2012
- Sep 1, 2012 Resolution update: August 2012 Sep 1, 2012
- Sep 1, 2012 Face down no matter what! Sep 1, 2012
August 2012
- Aug 31, 2012 A bushel of book recommendations Aug 31, 2012
- Aug 31, 2012 My childhood went by undocumented Aug 31, 2012
- Aug 30, 2012 A peek into the inbox of an author Aug 30, 2012
- Aug 30, 2012 The big guy is three months old today! Aug 30, 2012
- Aug 29, 2012 Safety warnings ignored at risk to Lamby Aug 29, 2012
- Aug 29, 2012 Impromptu driving range Aug 29, 2012
- Aug 28, 2012 The lowest forms of human communication Aug 28, 2012
- Aug 28, 2012 First haircut accomplished. Aug 28, 2012
- Aug 27, 2012 This is not supposed to be a complicated game. Aug 27, 2012
- Aug 27, 2012 Alex Pareene’s takedown of Andy Borowitz’s humor in Salon is a joke. Aug 27, 2012
- Aug 26, 2012 The many faces of Charles Wallace Aug 26, 2012
- Aug 26, 2012 Personal competition gets stuff done Aug 26, 2012
- Aug 25, 2012 The most critical lessons that I teach my students each year Aug 25, 2012
- Aug 25, 2012 She expects me to read her mind Aug 25, 2012
- Aug 24, 2012 Second place sucks Aug 24, 2012
- Aug 23, 2012 Three unique book reviews Aug 23, 2012
- Aug 23, 2012 Bookseller love Aug 23, 2012
- Aug 22, 2012 Forgetfulness Aug 22, 2012
- Aug 22, 2012 My book launch included three very special people Aug 22, 2012
- Aug 21, 2012 Pub day outfit Aug 21, 2012
- Aug 21, 2012 I am not alone on this new journey Aug 21, 2012
- Aug 21, 2012 Best tea party ever! Aug 21, 2012
- Aug 20, 2012 There’s a time and place for bad news Aug 20, 2012
- Aug 20, 2012 The iPhone needs a better name Aug 20, 2012
- Aug 19, 2012 I can teach you how to sleep Aug 19, 2012
- Aug 19, 2012 When choosing a gravestone, why not get creative? Aug 19, 2012
- Aug 18, 2012 Face down! All of you! Aug 18, 2012
- Aug 17, 2012 I spy a fundamental misunderstanding of the “I Spy” game Aug 17, 2012
- Aug 17, 2012 I experienced my first taste of anti-Semitism through online poker, and I’m not even Jewish. Aug 17, 2012
- Aug 17, 2012 A true-life space adventure that includes bears and wolves! Aug 17, 2012
- Aug 16, 2012 Design yourself Aug 16, 2012
- Aug 16, 2012 Twain understood the power of stupidity Aug 16, 2012
- Aug 16, 2012 My wife cannot abide by cheating, even if you could be dead tomorrow. Aug 16, 2012
- Aug 15, 2012 Paleontologist extraordinaire Aug 15, 2012
- Aug 15, 2012 I am capable of making serious financial and medical decisions while I am sleepwalking. That, my friends, is productivity. Aug 15, 2012
- Aug 14, 2012 I already wrote this story. Aug 14, 2012
- Aug 14, 2012 Manipulative. Indecisive. Transparent. Aug 14, 2012
- Aug 13, 2012 My wife is going to freakin’ love this. Aug 13, 2012
- Aug 13, 2012 Stop delaying the inevitable. Same-sex marriage is going to happen. Don’t be left standing with the ignorant and bigoted few. Aug 13, 2012
- Aug 13, 2012 How to sleep train your child Aug 13, 2012
- Aug 12, 2012 Men are much more likely to use nicknames. Is this true, and if so, why? Aug 12, 2012
- Aug 12, 2012 Misplaced priorities Aug 12, 2012
- Aug 11, 2012 Six questions about music that define you Aug 11, 2012
- Aug 11, 2012 It wasn’t bed bugs. It was just an exceptionally rare form of canine scabies. That’s all. Aug 11, 2012
- Aug 10, 2012 Just when everything was going so well… Aug 10, 2012
- Aug 10, 2012 Cardboard Tube Fighting Aug 10, 2012
- Aug 9, 2012 Ugly baby Aug 9, 2012
- Aug 9, 2012 Podcast naming winners announced Aug 9, 2012
- Aug 9, 2012 First bottle. Probably the last bottle. Aug 9, 2012
- Aug 8, 2012 My wife’s wedding vows Aug 8, 2012
- Aug 8, 2012 Watch. Laugh. And be very afraid. Aug 8, 2012
- Aug 8, 2012 Einstein was dumb Aug 8, 2012
- Aug 7, 2012 Curmudgeonly thinking Aug 7, 2012
- Aug 7, 2012 My wedding vows Aug 7, 2012
- Aug 7, 2012 My boy! Aug 7, 2012
- Aug 6, 2012 Three packages arrived last week. Only one was creepy and sexually inappropriate. Aug 6, 2012
- Aug 6, 2012 Prepare to cry Aug 6, 2012
- Aug 5, 2012 Maybe yoga isn’t such a good idea after all. Aug 5, 2012
- Aug 5, 2012 Is my extreme honesty hurting myself or helping others? Aug 5, 2012
- Aug 4, 2012 My mother soaked me in neurotoxins and endocrine disruptors as a child Aug 4, 2012
- Aug 3, 2012 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend is here! Aug 3, 2012
- Aug 3, 2012 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2012 Aug 3, 2012
- Aug 3, 2012 The problem with Slate’s Double X Gabfest Aug 3, 2012
- Aug 2, 2012 “Sticks and stones” does not apply in Italy Aug 2, 2012
- Aug 2, 2012 Why didn’t anyone tell me that all these women were have sex in front of me? Aug 2, 2012
- Aug 1, 2012 A surprising response to my request that women stop wearing makeup Aug 1, 2012
- Aug 1, 2012 Foreign editions have arrived! Aug 1, 2012
- Aug 1, 2012 Resolution update: July 2012 Aug 1, 2012
July 2012
- Jul 31, 2012 No makeup, ladies. Please? Jul 31, 2012
- Jul 30, 2012 2012: Products I can’t live without Jul 30, 2012
- Jul 30, 2012 I can totally picture that in my head. Jul 30, 2012
- Jul 29, 2012 Parenting is supposed to make you sad, frightened and neurotic. Don’t make your kids suffer by mitigating the pain. Jul 29, 2012
- Jul 28, 2012 The right way to make a commercial Jul 28, 2012
- Jul 27, 2012 Can I re-write a book from my back list the same way Def Leppard re-recorded songs and now owns their rights? Jul 27, 2012
- Jul 26, 2012 Does Wikipedia have a a woman problem or do women have a Wikipedia problem? Jul 26, 2012
- Jul 26, 2012 Zapped! Jul 26, 2012
- Jul 25, 2012 Signage for the stupid Jul 25, 2012
- Jul 25, 2012 More from The Baby Whisperer Jul 25, 2012
- Jul 25, 2012 Church of the Holy Penis Jul 25, 2012
- Jul 24, 2012 Five favorite quotes Jul 24, 2012
- Jul 24, 2012 The sexually suggestive Mr. Snuffleupagus Jul 24, 2012
- Jul 23, 2012 I questioned why there were young children at the Aurora theater, and there was nothing wrong with me doing so. Jul 23, 2012
- Jul 23, 2012 Three unjust presumptions Jul 23, 2012
- Jul 22, 2012 Psychoanalyzing my Moth GrandSLAM performance Jul 22, 2012
- Jul 22, 2012 The Baby Whisperer Jul 22, 2012
- Jul 22, 2012 Utterly terrifying super power Jul 22, 2012
- Jul 21, 2012 Least favorite animal Jul 21, 2012
- Jul 21, 2012 Urine, drugs and advertising Jul 21, 2012
- Jul 20, 2012 The recent decision by The Boy Scouts of America has left this Boy Scout rudderless Jul 20, 2012
- Jul 20, 2012 An added benefit to a great story Jul 20, 2012
- Jul 19, 2012 Matthew Brown reads Matthew Green Jul 19, 2012
- Jul 19, 2012 Now I feel like a loser Jul 19, 2012
- Jul 19, 2012 Thoughts from my second Moth GrandSLAM Jul 19, 2012
- Jul 18, 2012 Another fairly useless super power Jul 18, 2012
- Jul 18, 2012 This is something I will always remember Jul 18, 2012
- Jul 17, 2012 Wedding reboot: Making friends in ways I can’t begin to imagine Jul 17, 2012
- Jul 17, 2012 Plants can see! See you eat them! Jul 17, 2012
- Jul 16, 2012 The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Sadly, tragically, lamentably not for everyone Jul 16, 2012
- Jul 16, 2012 Wedding reboot: Free repairs Jul 16, 2012
- Jul 15, 2012 No one wants your stupid diploma so find something else to say. Jul 15, 2012
- Jul 15, 2012 Wedding reboot: My killjoy wife Jul 15, 2012
- Jul 15, 2012 Wedding reboot: Talent discovered off the coast of Bermuda Jul 15, 2012
- Jul 14, 2012 I will use The Force if necessary. Or the humiliation of a Star Wars plush backpack. Jul 14, 2012
- Jul 14, 2012 Wedding reboot: Even happier than a verbal victory Jul 14, 2012
- Jul 13, 2012 Have you ever seen a better looking burrito? Jul 13, 2012
- Jul 13, 2012 Difficulty staying Faithful Jul 13, 2012
- Jul 13, 2012 Wedding reboot: Perhaps my wife owns a crystal ball Jul 13, 2012
- Jul 12, 2012 Subtle and specific and possibly effective Jul 12, 2012
- Jul 12, 2012 I am launching a podcast and I need some advice. Best of all, I have prizes to offer. Jul 12, 2012
- Jul 11, 2012 Best two sentences ever Jul 11, 2012
- Jul 11, 2012 Universal acts of parental stupidity Jul 11, 2012
- Jul 10, 2012 Wedding reboot: Forgot the ring Jul 10, 2012
- Jul 10, 2012 I have never Jul 10, 2012
- Jul 10, 2012 Super secret time travel for the purposes of behavior management Jul 10, 2012
- Jul 9, 2012 Wedding reboot: Wedding response runner-up Jul 9, 2012
- Jul 9, 2012 Men want it all, too, damn it. Jul 9, 2012
- Jul 9, 2012 Do these prices make any sense to you? Jul 9, 2012
- Jul 8, 2012 Wedding reboot: Nana recommends pole dancing Jul 8, 2012
- Jul 8, 2012 Our little reader Jul 8, 2012
- Jul 7, 2012 Darth Vader would never have allowed such a cheap shot Jul 7, 2012
- Jul 7, 2012 Team effort Jul 7, 2012
- Jul 7, 2012 Wedding reboot: Favorite wedding moments Jul 7, 2012
- Jul 6, 2012 Wedding reboot: Best wedding response ever Jul 6, 2012
- Jul 6, 2012 From lunacy to reason in just three days Jul 6, 2012
- Jul 6, 2012 I hate the Red Sox, but I love these guys Jul 6, 2012
- Jul 5, 2012 Last year I punched the guy. Yesterday he apologized. Jul 5, 2012
- Jul 5, 2012 Replacing a monster of a father Jul 5, 2012
- Jul 5, 2012 My babies! Jul 5, 2012
- Jul 5, 2012 “The Most Amazing Bowling Story Ever” Jul 5, 2012
- Jul 4, 2012 Wedding reboot: Matt and Elysha trivia Jul 4, 2012
- Jul 4, 2012 Charlie and Mommy Jul 4, 2012
- Jul 4, 2012 Simian declarations Jul 4, 2012
- Jul 3, 2012 “I don’t want to be Jewish!” Jul 3, 2012
- Jul 3, 2012 MEMOIRS OF AN IMAGINARY FRIEND in Greece Jul 3, 2012
- Jul 3, 2012 The gender disparity of the marriage proposal Jul 3, 2012
- Jul 2, 2012 The inexplicable is fertile ground for fiction. Jul 2, 2012
- Jul 2, 2012 Resolution update: June 2012 Jul 2, 2012
- Jul 2, 2012 Pop head off before eating. Jul 2, 2012
- Jul 1, 2012 Teaching terrifying books? Jul 1, 2012
- Jul 1, 2012 My first hickey in a very long time Jul 1, 2012
June 2012
- Jun 30, 2012 Serious about sleep Jun 30, 2012
- Jun 30, 2012 My daughter’s first ambulance ride Jun 30, 2012
- Jun 29, 2012 Electricity, death, and some old fashioned backyard fun. Has there ever been a better combination? Jun 29, 2012
- Jun 29, 2012 Conflicting emotions Jun 29, 2012
- Jun 28, 2012 The Friendship Application 2.0 Jun 28, 2012
- Jun 28, 2012 Just say I screwed up Jun 28, 2012
- Jun 27, 2012 Imaginary amigo! Jun 27, 2012
- Jun 27, 2012 The surprising results of my highly unscientific social media survey (I’m honest, hard-working and jerky) and thoughts on effectively analyzing an author’s brand. Jun 27, 2012
- Jun 26, 2012 Making his feelings abundantly clear Jun 26, 2012
- Jun 26, 2012 A new, perhaps bladder-inspired ending to Tiny Furniture Jun 26, 2012
- Jun 26, 2012 Feel good Jun 26, 2012
- Jun 25, 2012 Charlie’s First Day Jun 25, 2012
- Jun 25, 2012 Final cover at last! And Publisher’s Weekly, too! Jun 25, 2012
- Jun 25, 2012 Strong evidence that I'm probably a terrible person Jun 25, 2012
- Jun 24, 2012 Father-son staring contest Jun 24, 2012
- Jun 24, 2012 I judged this book by its cover (and its title) because I'm an idiot Jun 24, 2012
- Jun 23, 2012 Little People at a Drive-In Theater Jun 23, 2012
- Jun 22, 2012 The odd, invented, sometimes violent, oftentimes adult oriented games of my childhood. Jun 22, 2012
- Jun 22, 2012 The benefits of delayed adolescence are exceptionally obvious and profoundly shortsighted. Jun 22, 2012
- Jun 21, 2012 Thick crust cheesy pizza alive and well Jun 21, 2012
- Jun 20, 2012 Bed cartography Jun 20, 2012
- Jun 20, 2012 Old people are hilarious. Jun 20, 2012
- Jun 19, 2012 One-handed typing made possible Jun 19, 2012
- Jun 19, 2012 I like myself a lot, but if given the choice, I might choose to be Jimmy Fallon instead. Jun 19, 2012
- Jun 18, 2012 “Luke, I am your father.” Jun 18, 2012
- Jun 18, 2012 Dead? Then why not be the firework? And not dead shark chunks. Jun 18, 2012
- Jun 17, 2012 You can heretofore refer to me as Lord Matthew J. Dicks if you would like, because I am an actual Lord. Seriously. Jun 17, 2012
- Jun 17, 2012 Stupidest name for a musical instrument ever. Possibly the stupidest name ever. Jun 17, 2012
- Jun 17, 2012 Grip Jun 17, 2012
- Jun 15, 2012 I want a standing desk, but I'd settle for the the most amazing desk in the history of human civilization as well. Jun 15, 2012
- Jun 14, 2012 I can play favorites with my children but not my books Jun 14, 2012
- Jun 13, 2012 Hybrid snobbery Jun 13, 2012
- Jun 13, 2012 Best baby gift so far Jun 13, 2012
- Jun 13, 2012 The first rule of memoir Jun 13, 2012
- Jun 12, 2012 The Moth: Bike Off Roof Jun 12, 2012
- Jun 12, 2012 Competing against my hero Jun 12, 2012
- Jun 11, 2012 My hometown on Blackstone, Massachusetts needs to learn the value of doing nothing Jun 11, 2012
- Jun 10, 2012 Resemblance update Jun 10, 2012
- Jun 10, 2012 When my wife and I argue, it’s about how our eldest child was conceived Jun 10, 2012
- Jun 9, 2012 See the resemblance? Jun 9, 2012
- Jun 9, 2012 Peeping Tom Jun 9, 2012
- Jun 8, 2012 The Moth: Shoe Thief Jun 8, 2012
- Jun 8, 2012 A moment that makes up for all the poop Jun 8, 2012
- Jun 7, 2012 Four audiobooks: One I loved, two I can’t wait to listen to, and one that annoys the hell out of me. Jun 7, 2012
- Jun 7, 2012 Cost effective way of attending college Jun 7, 2012
- Jun 7, 2012 There are places (and moments) that I will always remember Jun 7, 2012
- Jun 6, 2012 Resolution update: May 2012 Jun 6, 2012
- Jun 6, 2012 A recommendation, a quandary and a stupid book that belongs in the trash Jun 6, 2012
- Jun 5, 2012 I brought my son home from the hospital and found myself in the midst of Hartford’s Puerto Rican parade. Jun 5, 2012
- Jun 4, 2012 You can’t lie to a man with a penis Jun 4, 2012
- Jun 3, 2012 Carlos Fuentes understood me before I understood me Jun 3, 2012
- Jun 2, 2012 Stop trying to monopolize the angst, ladies. Jun 2, 2012
- Jun 1, 2012 Statistically speaking, am I the best husband and father of all time? And should I make my wife aware of these favorable numbers? Jun 1, 2012
May 2012
- May 31, 2012 What’s in a name? Several literary references. May 31, 2012
- May 30, 2012 My career as a professional best man is hindered only by a lack of teleportation May 30, 2012
- May 30, 2012 I suspect that working women are more mentally tough than Barbara Walters believes May 30, 2012
- May 29, 2012 Exposing the lunatic Little League coaches for who they really are. May 29, 2012
- May 29, 2012 Fostering disobedience May 29, 2012
- May 28, 2012 Not exactly a solution to my existential crisis, but it's a start. May 28, 2012
- May 27, 2012 Plants have a sense of smell. A SENSE OF SMELL, PEOPLE! This brings them one step closer to chickens and cows and pigs. May 27, 2012
- May 26, 2012 Will she be asking to meet for coffee next? May 26, 2012
- May 26, 2012 There must be something wrong with people who tan on a regular basis. Right? May 26, 2012
- May 25, 2012 Hate reading and hate watching: What a stupid, disingenuous waste of time May 25, 2012
- May 24, 2012 Go to bed (in a whisper) May 24, 2012
- May 23, 2012 How to win at tug of war May 23, 2012
- May 23, 2012 A rare glimpse at a master teacher at work May 23, 2012
- May 22, 2012 Go to bed! May 22, 2012
- May 22, 2012 Deathbed regrets revisited: 2012 May 22, 2012
- May 21, 2012 I don't like hot drinks. I may be a thermal taster. Kind of like a superhero. May 21, 2012
- May 21, 2012 Ranking Stephen King’s 62 books: Some minor quibbling on my part May 21, 2012
- May 20, 2012 A rare moment of recollection May 20, 2012
- May 20, 2012 This is absolutely true for men. Not so sure about women. May 20, 2012
- May 19, 2012 Three bits of wedding advice at the beginning of wedding season May 19, 2012
- May 18, 2012 Smart men thinking stupid things about death May 18, 2012
- May 18, 2012 I threw cases of French fries against walls to relieve stress. May 18, 2012
- May 17, 2012 Desperate times call for desperate measures May 17, 2012
- May 17, 2012 I am not a loser, little one, and I will have the shirt to prove it. May 17, 2012
- May 16, 2012 You have been replaced by an app, sir. May 16, 2012
- May 15, 2012 Recent press for Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend May 15, 2012
- May 15, 2012 Yes. I’m an author. Yes, with real books and everything. Why doesn't anyone want to believe me? May 15, 2012
- May 14, 2012 Is one book a year enough? May 14, 2012
- May 14, 2012 A whole new breed of middle school student May 14, 2012
- May 13, 2012 That moment… May 13, 2012
- May 13, 2012 Father’s Day May 13, 2012
- May 12, 2012 Elephant sandwich? May 12, 2012
- May 11, 2012 Gratitude journal: The best kind of friend May 11, 2012
- May 11, 2012 A noble rite of passage May 11, 2012
- May 11, 2012 My new hero: A six year old boy May 11, 2012
- May 10, 2012 Gratitude journal: Home at last May 10, 2012
- May 10, 2012 The Kingman Rule of Book Snobbery May 10, 2012
- May 10, 2012 How To Survive a Robot Uprising May 10, 2012
- May 9, 2012 Gratitude journal: Sleepless May 9, 2012
- May 9, 2012 A motorcycle, The Omen, a coin thief, a teenage love triangle and an escape from our home: The stories of my childhood babysitters May 9, 2012
- May 9, 2012 A peek into John Irving’s day May 9, 2012
- May 8, 2012 Gratitude journal: She swings! May 8, 2012
- May 8, 2012 Holding a serious bookish grudge May 8, 2012
- May 8, 2012 Kissing cousins May 8, 2012
- May 7, 2012 Gratitude journal: Baby still on board May 7, 2012
- May 7, 2012 The author’s brand: Which approach is best? And please don’t say whichever approach feels best to you, because that is annoying and not at all helpful. May 7, 2012
- May 6, 2012 Gratitude journal: Daddy got the outfit right May 6, 2012
- May 6, 2012 Prom update from a white boy May 6, 2012
- May 6, 2012 Adult-sized toilet. Child-sized toilet. Bet you can’t guess which one I used. May 6, 2012
- May 5, 2012 It’s like kudzu. May 5, 2012
- May 5, 2012 No prom allowed May 5, 2012
- May 5, 2012 Disaster averted. May 5, 2012
- May 4, 2012 Gratitude journal: Grandparent love May 4, 2012
- May 4, 2012 She loves her future sibling, perhaps because she has not been asked to share yet. May 4, 2012
- May 4, 2012 My wife looks beautiful, so shut up, lady. May 4, 2012
- May 3, 2012 Gratitude journal: My solo mission May 3, 2012
- May 3, 2012 French toast is her Muse May 3, 2012
- May 3, 2012 Resolution update: April 2012 May 3, 2012
- May 2, 2012 Gratitude journal: Still her favorite thing to do May 2, 2012
- May 2, 2012 I forged author Kate DiCamillo’s signature, but don’t worry. I was signing one of her books. May 2, 2012
- May 2, 2012 My little future novelist? May 2, 2012
- May 1, 2012 Gratitude journal: First day bliss May 1, 2012
- May 1, 2012 Newburyport Literary Festival 2012 May 1, 2012
- May 1, 2012 My stable of podcasts May 1, 2012
April 2012
- Apr 30, 2012 Gratitude journal: New shoes! Apr 30, 2012
- Apr 30, 2012 Gift giving insurance: Appealing to the basest, most vile members of the human race Apr 30, 2012
- Apr 30, 2012 A song for all the crazy readers of the world Apr 30, 2012
- Apr 29, 2012 Gratitude journal: The boss lady Apr 29, 2012
- Apr 29, 2012 The secret to early retirement Apr 29, 2012
- Apr 28, 2012 Gratitude journal: So damn lucky Apr 28, 2012
- Apr 28, 2012 A long period of self-imposed silence might be lifting Apr 28, 2012
- Apr 28, 2012 My new favorite photo of me and my girl Apr 28, 2012
- Apr 27, 2012 Gratitude journal: This Apr 27, 2012
- Apr 27, 2012 The prize for this writing contest includes tears and humiliation Apr 27, 2012
- Apr 27, 2012 Literary juxtaposition Apr 27, 2012
- Apr 26, 2012 Gratitude journal: Cuddling the baby Apr 26, 2012
- Apr 26, 2012 Forgetting she’s gone Apr 26, 2012
- Apr 26, 2012 Wisdom beyond his years. Or perhaps I just have a lot of growing up to do. Apr 26, 2012
- Apr 25, 2012 Gratitude journal: Class or an AT&T dead zone Apr 25, 2012
- Apr 25, 2012 A bookseller, a reader and an imaginary friend Apr 25, 2012
- Apr 25, 2012 Background television makes you stupid. Or perhaps you're an idiot for failing to turn off the television in the first place. Either way, turn the damn thing off when you're not watching. Apr 25, 2012
- Apr 24, 2012 Gratitude journal: The absolute euphoria of prime factorization Apr 24, 2012
- Apr 24, 2012 A joyous respite for book lovers everywhere Apr 24, 2012
- Apr 24, 2012 The joy of a cupcake Apr 24, 2012
- Apr 23, 2012 Gratitude journal: A place for the pooch Apr 23, 2012
- Apr 23, 2012 Reflections on Booktopia 2012 Apr 23, 2012
- Apr 23, 2012 Pebbles Apr 23, 2012
- Apr 22, 2012 Gratitude journal: Reunion Apr 22, 2012
- Apr 22, 2012 On the topic of book covers: Recommended listening and recommended viewing Apr 22, 2012
- Apr 22, 2012 My recent NYC visit included a fibrous hymen, a visit with a fictional character and a heart wrenching betrayal by a friend. Apr 22, 2012
- Apr 22, 2012 Gratitude journal: Avoiding the math Apr 22, 2012
- Apr 21, 2012 Foiled! Apr 21, 2012
- Apr 21, 2012 Wisdom above a toilet Apr 21, 2012
- Apr 20, 2012 Gratitude journal: More than just babysitters Apr 20, 2012
- Apr 20, 2012 The Moth: The Freak Apr 20, 2012
- Apr 20, 2012 Gratitude journal: Diana Apr 20, 2012
- Apr 18, 2012 Gratitude journal: Third wheeling Apr 18, 2012
- Apr 18, 2012 The Moth: Life Lessons Learned While Pole Vaulting Apr 18, 2012
- Apr 18, 2012 Knuffle Bunny Free nearly made my wife weep. I would've cried had I not been so manly. Apr 18, 2012
- Apr 17, 2012 Gratitude journal: Frightened daughter Apr 17, 2012
- Apr 17, 2012 If you’re looking to buy me something… Apr 17, 2012
- Apr 17, 2012 I have a very defined sensibility, or I perhaps I'm just a lunatic. Apr 17, 2012
- Apr 16, 2012 Gratitude journal: This Apr 16, 2012
- Apr 16, 2012 Anatomy of a book cover Apr 16, 2012
- Apr 16, 2012 No more home runs. Please. I’m begging you. Apr 16, 2012
- Apr 15, 2012 Gratitude journal: Books before film Apr 15, 2012
- Apr 15, 2012 “That was the greatest thing I ever saw at school!” Apr 15, 2012
- Apr 14, 2012 Gratitude journal: Firsts Apr 14, 2012
- Apr 14, 2012 Traitorous progeny Apr 14, 2012
- Apr 14, 2012 Meta Apr 14, 2012
- Apr 13, 2012 Gratitude journal: Baby still cooking Apr 13, 2012
- Apr 13, 2012 Looking for a literary agent? Have you tried this strategy yet? Apr 13, 2012
- Apr 12, 2012 Gratitude journal: He thankfully fired first. Apr 12, 2012
- Apr 12, 2012 Metaphorically speaking? Apr 12, 2012
- Apr 12, 2012 Caine’s Arcade: Pure joy Apr 12, 2012
- Apr 12, 2012 Bob Dylan was oh so right. Apr 12, 2012
- Apr 11, 2012 Gratitude journal: Separated at birth Apr 11, 2012
- Apr 11, 2012 Click over to read. Apr 11, 2012
- Apr 11, 2012 Why are doctors such liars? Apr 11, 2012
- Apr 10, 2012 Gratitude journal: Pink elephant availability Apr 10, 2012
- Apr 10, 2012 The 21 stages of accepting an agent’s critique Apr 10, 2012
- Apr 10, 2012 Too much like Daddy Apr 10, 2012
- Apr 9, 2012 Gratitude journal: Dancing in the kitchen Apr 9, 2012
- Apr 9, 2012 When was I supposed to tell him that she is pregnant? Apr 9, 2012
- Apr 8, 2012 Gratitude journal: Plentiful Easter Apr 8, 2012
- Apr 8, 2012 Ant killer turned ant savior Apr 8, 2012
- Apr 8, 2012 My Wikipedia dream Apr 8, 2012
- Apr 7, 2012 Gratitude journal: Peanut free Easter candy Apr 7, 2012
- Apr 7, 2012 Instagram Budo Apr 7, 2012
- Apr 7, 2012 Waiting for Daddy Apr 7, 2012
- Apr 6, 2012 Gratitude journal: WordPress Apr 6, 2012
- Apr 6, 2012 Say it ain't so. Apr 6, 2012
- Apr 6, 2012 Unusual, inexplicable, tragic and occasionally victorious Apr 6, 2012
- Apr 5, 2012 Gratitude journal: Four square Apr 5, 2012
- Apr 4, 2012 What do you think of the blog’s new design? Apr 4, 2012
- Apr 4, 2012 Bambi Vs. Godzilla: Pleasantly surprised Apr 4, 2012
- Apr 3, 2012 Gratitude journal: Three good geeks Apr 3, 2012
- Apr 3, 2012 What were you doing in your twenties? Apr 3, 2012
- Apr 2, 2012 Gratitude journal: Booksellers everywhere Apr 2, 2012
- Apr 2, 2012 It's a girl! Apr 2, 2012
- Apr 1, 2012 Gratitude journal: The denial of ice cream Apr 1, 2012
- Apr 1, 2012 Resolution update: March 2012 Apr 1, 2012
- Apr 1, 2012 Anti-Barney rhetoric proves to be effective Apr 1, 2012
March 2012
- Mar 31, 2012 Gratitude journal: Location location location Mar 31, 2012
- Mar 31, 2012 The Pteranodon song Mar 31, 2012
- Mar 31, 2012 I will marry you: 3 things to look for when hiring a wedding officiant Mar 31, 2012
- Mar 30, 2012 Gratitude journal: Surprise Mar 30, 2012
- Mar 30, 2012 Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend: An audio preview Mar 30, 2012
- Mar 29, 2012 Gratitude journal: A stolen kiss Mar 29, 2012
- Mar 29, 2012 I think I have finally found the perfect catchphrase to use when signing a reader’s book. Mar 29, 2012
- Mar 28, 2012 Gratitude journal: The ticking of the clock Mar 28, 2012
- Mar 28, 2012 The Golden Rule: Complete and total nonsense Mar 28, 2012
- Mar 27, 2012 Gratitude journal: Daddy Mar 27, 2012
- Mar 27, 2012 She has this new baby thing all figured out. Mar 27, 2012
- Mar 27, 2012 Guessing game gone awry Mar 27, 2012
- Mar 26, 2012 Gratitude journal: The best of friends Mar 26, 2012
- Mar 26, 2012 My first library book: Desperately seeking the title Mar 26, 2012
- Mar 26, 2012 Gone fishin’ Mar 26, 2012
- Mar 25, 2012 Gratitude journal: Clara’s kisses Mar 25, 2012
- Mar 25, 2012 Adolescent boys are apparently easily entertained by really stupid (but AWESOME) stuff Mar 25, 2012
- Mar 25, 2012 I finally read Where the Wild Things Are. Sort of. Mar 25, 2012
- Mar 24, 2012 Gratitude journal: The almost perfect game Mar 24, 2012
- Mar 24, 2012 Blurb! Mar 24, 2012
- Mar 24, 2012 Cutest astronaut ever Mar 24, 2012
- Mar 23, 2012 Gratitude journal: The perfect game Mar 23, 2012
- Mar 23, 2012 Insightful and hilarious confirmation that my publisher and I are a perfect match Mar 23, 2012
- Mar 23, 2012 Bun Head’s lesson to a bad boy and future teacher. Mar 23, 2012
- Mar 22, 2012 Gratitude journal: I didn’t marry that woman. Mar 22, 2012
- Mar 22, 2012 The evolving sadness of my mother’s death Mar 22, 2012
- Mar 21, 2012 Gratitude journal: My big little writers Mar 21, 2012
- Mar 21, 2012 Radio New Zealand interview Mar 21, 2012
- Mar 21, 2012 Heartbreakingly amusing Mar 21, 2012
- Mar 21, 2012 New York girl Mar 21, 2012
- Mar 20, 2012 Gratitude journal: A lost cow finds its way home Mar 20, 2012
- Mar 20, 2012 Storm troopers with iPhones Mar 20, 2012
- Mar 19, 2012 Gratitude journal: 2012 Mar 19, 2012
- Mar 19, 2012 “Striking many” and “wishing death to some” still allows time for plenty of math and science Mar 19, 2012
- Mar 19, 2012 Some of the toughest parental decisions that I'll ever have to make may be about Star Wars Mar 19, 2012
- Mar 18, 2012 Gratitude journal: He’s alive, well and interesting. Mar 18, 2012
- Mar 18, 2012 Stegosauruses are for losers Mar 18, 2012
- Mar 18, 2012 Inexplicable stupidity Mar 18, 2012
- Mar 17, 2012 Gratitude journal: She loves dinosaurs! Mar 17, 2012
- Mar 17, 2012 He ruined my iPhone. Mar 17, 2012
- Mar 17, 2012 Pandering or positivity? Mar 17, 2012
- Mar 16, 2012 Gratitude journal: My kids Mar 16, 2012
- Mar 16, 2012 Why you will fail to have a great career Mar 16, 2012
- Mar 16, 2012 SOMETHING MISSING: Asian style Mar 16, 2012
- Mar 16, 2012 Elysha Dicks is cool. Mar 16, 2012
- Mar 15, 2012 Gratitude journal: Clara in the morning Mar 15, 2012
- Mar 15, 2012 When it comes to a pregnant woman’s size, ladies, please just shut the hell up. Mar 15, 2012
- Mar 15, 2012 No recording allowed Mar 15, 2012
- Mar 14, 2012 Gratitude journal: Readers live-tweeting my book Mar 14, 2012
- Mar 14, 2012 Put yourself out there Mar 14, 2012
- Mar 14, 2012 Spite is your friend Mar 14, 2012
- Mar 13, 2012 Gratitude journal: Portlandia Mar 13, 2012
- Mar 13, 2012 Three Little Pigs: Hardcore Mar 13, 2012
- Mar 13, 2012 You can’t take back slut. Mar 13, 2012
- Mar 12, 2012 Gratitude journal: A good sleeper Mar 12, 2012
- Mar 12, 2012 Keep Calm and Carry On Mar 12, 2012
- Mar 12, 2012 Our romantic evening with the engineer Mar 12, 2012
- Mar 11, 2012 Gratitude journal: Gramps Mar 11, 2012
- Mar 11, 2012 What kind of discount would you expect after a night like this? Mar 11, 2012
- Mar 11, 2012 Times Square: The place that New Yorkers love to hate Mar 11, 2012
- Mar 11, 2012 Budo and company are well traveled Mar 11, 2012
- Mar 10, 2012 Gratitude journal: The benefits of dragging a pregnant woman around the city with you Mar 10, 2012
- Mar 10, 2012 Our little scientist! Mar 10, 2012
- Mar 10, 2012 A one minute Davy Jones audition video breaks my heart. What is wrong with me? Mar 10, 2012
- Mar 9, 2012 Gratitude Journal: This guy Mar 9, 2012
- Mar 9, 2012 I won another Moth StorySLAM, and this time my wife deserves all of the credit. Mar 9, 2012
- Mar 8, 2012 Gratitude journal: Simplicity Mar 8, 2012
- Mar 8, 2012 Does the television weatherman serve any useful purpose anymore? I think not. Mar 8, 2012
- Mar 8, 2012 My book has gone abroad Mar 8, 2012
- Mar 7, 2012 “In My Life” I have never seen anything better Mar 7, 2012
- Mar 6, 2012 Gratitude journal: Idiot cat knows one important thing Mar 6, 2012
- Mar 6, 2012 Baby Lily is an orphan and I shouldn’t give a damn. Mar 6, 2012
- Mar 5, 2012 Gratitude journal: No gestational diabetes Mar 5, 2012
- Mar 5, 2012 That does suck. Mar 5, 2012
- Mar 5, 2012 Near-death understanding Mar 5, 2012
- Mar 4, 2012 Gratitude journal: Exceptionally practical friends who understand that brevity is the soul of wit Mar 4, 2012
- Mar 4, 2012 The future is apparently now. Jetsons-styled food is almost here. Ice cream, however, remains a problem. Mar 4, 2012
- Mar 4, 2012 No one tried to kill me last night. For a change. Mar 4, 2012
- Mar 3, 2012 Gratitude journal: An abundance of ideas Mar 3, 2012
- Mar 3, 2012 Has the pie-in-the-window cliché ever been put into practice? Even once? Mar 3, 2012
- Mar 3, 2012 Resolution update: February 2012 Mar 3, 2012
- Mar 2, 2012 Gratitude journal: Dr. Seuss Mar 2, 2012
- Mar 2, 2012 Long lost ex-step-siblings and reincarnated brothers Mar 2, 2012
- Mar 2, 2012 Pole vaulting, mailbox baseball and going to the prom are just a few of my ideas. Mar 2, 2012
- Mar 1, 2012 Gratitude journal: Lunch with a pretty girl Mar 1, 2012
- Mar 1, 2012 International pub day for Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend Mar 1, 2012
- Mar 1, 2012 My disrespect for a life of leisure is unfortunate but real. Also supported by one of America's greatest statesmen. Mar 1, 2012
February 2012
- Feb 29, 2012 Gratitude journal: The unplanned, unexpected, spontaneous nap Feb 29, 2012
- Feb 29, 2012 Another Starbucks zombie reject Feb 29, 2012
- Feb 29, 2012 Look. Someone ruined lollipops. Feb 29, 2012
- Feb 28, 2012 Gratitude journal: The life-altering surprise visit Feb 28, 2012
- Feb 28, 2012 I am not a Starbucks zombie. Feb 28, 2012
- Feb 28, 2012 The positive, vicious circle of weight loss Feb 28, 2012
- Feb 28, 2012 Sesame Street is better with friends. A whole lot of well organized, hyper-attentive friends. Feb 28, 2012
- Feb 27, 2012 Gratitude journal: Time zones (I know. Weird, huh?) Feb 27, 2012
- Feb 27, 2012 Breakfast and The Beatles (and a little chair dancing) Feb 27, 2012
- Feb 27, 2012 I can only hope that my students were playing videogames or watching TV or playing with fire when Rick Santorum was speaking. Feb 27, 2012
- Feb 26, 2012 Gratitude journal: Just the right movie for a workout Feb 26, 2012
- Feb 26, 2012 Shopping and cooking take too much damn time. Feb 26, 2012
- Feb 25, 2012 Happy to not suffer from a shrinking penis Feb 25, 2012
- Feb 25, 2012 Mindy Kaling’s 13 Rules for Guys Feb 25, 2012
- Feb 25, 2012 I know she’s not actually reading… Feb 25, 2012
- Feb 24, 2012 Gratitude journal: Daddy! Feb 24, 2012
- Feb 24, 2012 Cat Stevens taught me that authors should not act like jerks. Feb 24, 2012
- Feb 24, 2012 Real estate booming in certain sectors Feb 24, 2012
- Feb 23, 2012 Gratitude journal: This and this Feb 23, 2012
- Feb 23, 2012 A lot of preparation required in order to watch TV Feb 23, 2012
- Feb 22, 2012 Gratitude journal: Not tempted in the slightest Feb 22, 2012
- Feb 22, 2012 It’s here! Feb 22, 2012
- Feb 22, 2012 Three important writing lessons, as described by my three-year old daughter Feb 22, 2012
- Feb 21, 2012 Gratitude journal: I was wrong. I’m so glad. Feb 21, 2012
- Feb 21, 2012 Raising my daughter is a piece of cake, and there’s a good reason why I say this as often as possible. Feb 21, 2012
- Feb 20, 2012 Gratitude journal: The sliver of time spent in the car Feb 20, 2012
- Feb 20, 2012 Dinner with a dead man Feb 20, 2012
- Feb 20, 2012 Pirate ship/In-law apartment Feb 20, 2012
- Feb 19, 2012 Gratitude journal: The cat-saving, stain-removing, near-miraculous SpotBot Feb 19, 2012
- Feb 19, 2012 Why learning to write well matters. Feb 19, 2012
- Feb 18, 2012 Gratitude journal: The Cadbury Crème Egg Feb 18, 2012
- Feb 18, 2012 Movie crusade update Feb 18, 2012
- Feb 18, 2012 Not cool. Feb 18, 2012
- Feb 17, 2012 Gratitude journal: A lack of sensitivity Feb 17, 2012
- Feb 17, 2012 Falik took the bathroom. What should Dicks name? Feb 17, 2012
- Feb 16, 2012 Gratitude journal: My daughter’s illiteracy Feb 16, 2012
- Feb 16, 2012 Weeping, I tell you. WEEPING. Feb 16, 2012
- Feb 16, 2012 Baby-in-the-movie follow-up and the start of a new crusade Feb 16, 2012
- Feb 15, 2012 Gratitude journal: Perfect behavior Feb 15, 2012
- Feb 15, 2012 I went to see The Descendants and found myself sitting beside two morons and their baby. Feb 15, 2012
- Feb 15, 2012 Gratitude journal: Tupperware Feb 15, 2012
- Feb 14, 2012 The problem with karma (and my completely realistic solution) Feb 14, 2012
- Feb 13, 2012 Gratitude journal: The awfulness snuck up on me and now it is over Feb 13, 2012
- Feb 13, 2012 Yes, it was a jerky thing to do, but it made me happy and she deserved it. Feb 13, 2012
- Feb 13, 2012 Do you ever cross your fingers anymore? Feb 13, 2012
- Feb 12, 2012 Gratitude journal: Possibility Feb 12, 2012
- Feb 12, 2012 5 rules to follow when you find or steal a wallet or handbag Feb 12, 2012
- Feb 11, 2012 Gratitude journal: Uploading to Google Docs Feb 11, 2012
- Feb 11, 2012 Even if it’s the best thing ever, I’m not sure that I want to do it if hipster parents in Park Slope are doing it, too. Feb 11, 2012
- Feb 11, 2012 The unexpected hazards of golf, including the potential to be stabbed Feb 11, 2012
- Feb 10, 2012 Gratitude journal: Cheapest surgery ever Feb 10, 2012
- Feb 10, 2012 I love my gym, but I can hardly vote for it as the best health and fitness center if it’s killing people Feb 10, 2012
- Feb 10, 2012 More sexy rumpus: Wiser words have never been spoken Feb 10, 2012
- Feb 9, 2012 Gratitude journal: New shoes Feb 9, 2012
- Feb 9, 2012 Best goodnight ever Feb 9, 2012
- Feb 9, 2012 Jesus Christ and these capital letters do not belong Feb 9, 2012
- Feb 8, 2012 Gratitude journal: Well timed stranger danger (and a little parental cruelty) Feb 8, 2012
- Feb 8, 2012 A joyous third birthday! Feb 8, 2012
- Feb 8, 2012 He returns Feb 8, 2012
- Feb 7, 2012 Gratitude journal: A daughter’s excitement Feb 7, 2012
- Feb 7, 2012 Last time being two Feb 7, 2012
- Feb 7, 2012 A potentially great day ruined by you-know-what Feb 7, 2012
- Feb 6, 2012 Gratitude journal: Unexpected empathy Feb 6, 2012
- Feb 6, 2012 Cowboy Clara Feb 6, 2012
- Feb 6, 2012 The world is no less polite or civil today than in years past. You're just blind to the realities of history, technology, and memory. Feb 6, 2012
- Feb 5, 2012 Gratitude journal: A safe arrival, a game of poker and an honest-to-goodness resurrection Feb 5, 2012
- Feb 5, 2012 No one needs this much room to poop. Feb 5, 2012
- Feb 5, 2012 She gets ice cream. We get chicken and pasta? Feb 5, 2012
- Feb 4, 2012 What happened to bunnies and kitties and cookies? Feb 4, 2012
- Feb 4, 2012 Resolution update: January 2012 Feb 4, 2012
- Feb 2, 2012 If you’re going to ask one question in an interview, perhaps it should be, “Tell me about your parents.” Feb 2, 2012
- Feb 1, 2012 Gratitude journal: Visiting the fish Feb 1, 2012
- Feb 1, 2012 My goodnight kiss Feb 1, 2012
- Feb 1, 2012 Close Encounters of the Third Kind: A great movie tragically marred by Steven Spielberg's failure to engage in unprotected sex. Feb 1, 2012
January 2012
- Jan 31, 2012 Gratitude journal (with a sprinkle of spite): Fountain soda and NOT COFFEE Jan 31, 2012
- Jan 31, 2012 A tickle. Not a tissue. Jan 31, 2012
- Jan 31, 2012 I am an upright, though occasionally marginalized, Pacific Islander. Jan 31, 2012
- Jan 30, 2012 Gratitude journal: Many hands thrust Budo and his friends into the light Jan 30, 2012
- Jan 30, 2012 Skating on linoleum: A future Olympic sport Jan 30, 2012
- Jan 30, 2012 Rules for surviving a zombie apocalypse (based upon ACTUAL EXPERIENCE) Jan 30, 2012
- Jan 29, 2012 Gratitude journal: Unexpected reader response Jan 29, 2012
- Jan 29, 2012 Rage against the dying of the light, damn it. Jan 29, 2012
- Jan 29, 2012 Birthday girl! Jan 29, 2012
- Jan 28, 2012 Gratitude journal: Recycled furniture Jan 28, 2012
- Jan 28, 2012 Name game Jan 28, 2012
- Jan 28, 2012 Icky Jan 28, 2012
- Jan 27, 2012 Gratitude journal: Patience Jan 27, 2012
- Jan 27, 2012 It’s true. I have no neck. Jan 27, 2012
- Jan 27, 2012 She works in cheese Jan 27, 2012
- Jan 26, 2012 Gratitude journal: Dental technology Jan 26, 2012
- Jan 26, 2012 Twitter goodness Jan 26, 2012
- Jan 26, 2012 Best umbrella ever. Jan 26, 2012
- Jan 26, 2012 Clara’s first day: January 25, 2009 Jan 26, 2012
- Jan 25, 2012 Gratitude journal: Andy Mayo Jan 25, 2012
- Jan 25, 2012 Sick of your date asking to split a dessert? I have the solution that will change your life forever. Seriously. Jan 25, 2012
- Jan 25, 2012 It was a girl! Jan 25, 2012
- Jan 25, 2012 Kind of surprised that I used the phrase “damn it” in a letter to my soon-to-be-born daughter Jan 25, 2012
- Jan 24, 2012 Gratitude journal: A ticket and a kaleidoscope Jan 24, 2012
- Jan 24, 2012 5 amazing fantastic things that I stupidly misjudged or prejudged initially Jan 24, 2012
- Jan 24, 2012 Cautionary Tale unnecessary Jan 24, 2012
- Jan 23, 2012 You should not compare your wife to an elephant, regardless of the context Jan 23, 2012
- Jan 23, 2012 A nightmare involving crystal meth, the New England Patriots and Mandy Patinkin Jan 23, 2012
- Jan 22, 2012 Gratitude journal: Patriots Jan 22, 2012
- Jan 22, 2012 It’s the Year of the Dragon, which is a hell of a lot better than the year of the rat or the rooster Jan 22, 2012
- Jan 22, 2012 Untrustworthy narrator Jan 22, 2012
- Jan 21, 2012 Gratitude journal: Fraidy-cats Jan 21, 2012
- Jan 21, 2012 The many covers of SOMETHING MISSING Jan 21, 2012
- Jan 21, 2012 You are probably stupid in comparison to your children, and you only have your parents to blame Jan 21, 2012
- Jan 21, 2012 A Charlie Brown Christmas, again and again and again Jan 21, 2012
- Jan 20, 2012 Nick Bottom saves the day Jan 20, 2012
- Jan 20, 2012 In the company of greatness Jan 20, 2012
- Jan 20, 2012 Towers and castles and monuments, oh my! Jan 20, 2012
- Jan 20, 2012 The reason that you are trying to lose weight could be the key to your success or failure Jan 20, 2012
- Jan 19, 2012 Gratitude journal: My wife’s tears Jan 19, 2012
- Jan 19, 2012 Underwhelming. No, more than that. Weird. Jan 19, 2012
- Jan 19, 2012 SOMETHING MISSING: The Korean edition Jan 19, 2012
- Jan 19, 2012 Three simple, slightly spiteful, steps to happiness Jan 19, 2012
- Jan 18, 2012 Gratitude for gloves and mittens Jan 18, 2012
- Jan 18, 2012 The greatest sacrifice of all Jan 18, 2012
- Jan 18, 2012 Why Your Life Sucks in Two Simple Pictures Jan 18, 2012
- Jan 18, 2012 Why my daughter is free to watch Scooby Doo whenever she damn well pleases Jan 18, 2012
- Jan 17, 2012 Gratitude journal: The family dinner Jan 17, 2012
- Jan 17, 2012 Todd Glass’s call for support of the LGBT community Jan 17, 2012
- Jan 17, 2012 Hilarious because it’s a farce and it’s also so true Jan 17, 2012
- Jan 17, 2012 Toddler definitions are the best Jan 17, 2012
- Jan 16, 2012 Gratitude journal: Orthotics Jan 16, 2012
- Jan 16, 2012 Four tiny bites of carrot ruined my night. Jan 16, 2012
- Jan 16, 2012 An end to the ritual of the funeral processional, at least for me Jan 16, 2012
- Jan 16, 2012 Punishing my daughter and punishing myself Jan 16, 2012
- Jan 15, 2012 Gratitude journal: Wife Jan 15, 2012
- Jan 15, 2012 Sharing stinks Jan 15, 2012
- Jan 15, 2012 Defying the odds, the most unlikely delivery ever, and burning Tebow in effigy Jan 15, 2012
- Jan 14, 2012 Gratitude journal: Engaged readers Jan 14, 2012
- Jan 14, 2012 Fruit salad Jan 14, 2012
- Jan 14, 2012 I can't identify a Kardashian because I look away. Jan 14, 2012
- Jan 13, 2012 Gratitude journal: Inexplicable acceptance Jan 13, 2012
- Jan 13, 2012 A new way of speaking that my wife cannot object to. Right? Jan 13, 2012
- Jan 13, 2012 Mexican worry doll gave me something to seriously worry about Jan 13, 2012
- Jan 13, 2012 Not exactly normal behavior Jan 13, 2012
- Jan 12, 2012 Gratitude journal: The phone call Jan 12, 2012
- Jan 12, 2012 Non-starter Jan 12, 2012
- Jan 12, 2012 Pajama Day takedown Jan 12, 2012
- Jan 11, 2012 Gratitude journal: Boo Boo Penguin Jan 11, 2012
- Jan 11, 2012 Delaying what is inevitable and right Jan 11, 2012
- Jan 11, 2012 Unexpected sympathy Jan 11, 2012
- Jan 11, 2012 My lack of a nightstand Jan 11, 2012
- Jan 10, 2012 Gratitude journal: Rocketfish RF-MAB2 Headphones Jan 10, 2012
- Jan 10, 2012 Lowering the bar for husbands everywhere Jan 10, 2012
- Jan 9, 2012 Gratitude journal: Bowling for Soup Jan 9, 2012
- Jan 9, 2012 Perfect descriptor Jan 9, 2012
- Jan 8, 2012 Gratitude journal: Clara’s special kiss Jan 8, 2012
- Jan 8, 2012 Elysha’s surprise party Jan 8, 2012
- Jan 8, 2012 When you’re done pushing the baby out, I have a sentence to write, honey. Jan 8, 2012
- Jan 7, 2012 Gratitude journal: The perfect babysitter Jan 7, 2012
- Jan 7, 2012 Accurate assessment of the situation Jan 7, 2012
- Jan 7, 2012 The efficacy of a mother should never be overlooked. Jan 7, 2012
- Jan 7, 2012 Damn. He read my mind perfectly. Jan 7, 2012
- Jan 6, 2012 A positively spiteful attitude is a beautiful thing Jan 6, 2012
- Jan 6, 2012 Our little flower girl Jan 6, 2012
- Jan 6, 2012 Pen and ink are not required for history Jan 6, 2012
- Jan 5, 2012 Gratitude journal: Cuddling and closure Jan 5, 2012
- Jan 5, 2012 25 Things, again Jan 5, 2012
- Jan 5, 2012 Don’t mess with my 7-11 Jan 5, 2012
- Jan 4, 2012 The first post of my gratitude journal Jan 4, 2012
- Jan 4, 2012 It’s a boy! Jan 4, 2012
- Jan 4, 2012 The music of UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO Jan 4, 2012
- Jan 4, 2012 White people choose Presidential candidates Jan 4, 2012
- Jan 3, 2012 And she wanted to wait in the car… Jan 3, 2012
- Jan 3, 2012 Resolutions that didn’t make the list in 2012 Jan 3, 2012
- Jan 2, 2012 New Year’s Resolutions 2012 Jan 2, 2012
- Jan 2, 2012 C-L-A-R-A spells Clara Jan 2, 2012
- Jan 1, 2012 If bacteria can solve Sodoku, how challenging or worthwhile can it be? Jan 1, 2012
- Jan 1, 2012 Quality family time Jan 1, 2012
December 2011
- Dec 31, 2011 Cheesy, over-the-top, obnoxious nonsense Dec 31, 2011
- Dec 31, 2011 Resolution update: 2011 in review Dec 31, 2011
- Dec 30, 2011 Skype and Facebook do not mitigate the absence of a loved one, and it was stupid of Roger Angell to assert otherwise Dec 30, 2011
- Dec 30, 2011 My awkward, uncomfortable gay moment Dec 30, 2011
- Dec 29, 2011 Six months later, the New York Times finds a whole need breed of douchebags to quote about wrist watches Dec 29, 2011
- Dec 29, 2011 Maximum joy Dec 29, 2011
- Dec 28, 2011 The story of our engagement Dec 28, 2011
- Dec 28, 2011 Outsourcing my New Year’s resolutions: Would you like to play a role? Dec 28, 2011
- Dec 28, 2011 A book with real secrets waiting to be revealed (with a thumb or a hair dryer) Dec 28, 2011
- Dec 27, 2011 How a fan of Boston sports fell in love with the Yankees Dec 27, 2011
- Dec 27, 2011 Full house Dec 27, 2011
- Dec 26, 2011 You are not pregnant. She is. Dec 26, 2011
- Dec 26, 2011 My 2011 Christmas haul Dec 26, 2011
- Dec 25, 2011 Complex naming formula Dec 25, 2011
- Dec 25, 2011 A perfect Christmas message Dec 25, 2011
- Dec 24, 2011 First piece for the new house Dec 24, 2011
- Dec 24, 2011 I am apparently not nice to people Dec 24, 2011
- Dec 24, 2011 Future storyteller? Dec 24, 2011
- Dec 23, 2011 A reward for a stolen umbrella transformed into a reward for the execution of a small boy. Better than an obit for a still-alive mother. Dec 23, 2011
- Dec 23, 2011 Justin Bieber and a pile of books! Dec 23, 2011
- Dec 22, 2011 Business idea using a Google search and a willing celebrity Dec 22, 2011
- Dec 22, 2011 My daughter may be choosing her career path Dec 22, 2011
- Dec 21, 2011 The Emperor might have been better off with Han Solo and Luke Skywalker foiling his plans Dec 21, 2011
- Dec 21, 2011 Worst Hanukkah ever Dec 21, 2011
- Dec 20, 2011 One of my favorite words was added to the American Heritage Dictionary Dec 20, 2011
- Dec 20, 2011 Inexplicably real Dec 20, 2011
- Dec 19, 2011 Deadlines be damned! Dec 19, 2011
- Dec 19, 2011 They tried to slice my throat open, but I stopped them with my words. Dec 19, 2011
- Dec 18, 2011 My two simple rules of gift giving Dec 18, 2011
- Dec 17, 2011 I hereby call for a boycott on the stupidity of packaged greeting cards Dec 17, 2011
- Dec 16, 2011 His position on same sex marriage is abhorrent, but credit him for his civility and willing to engage Dec 16, 2011
- Dec 16, 2011 2011 Dec 16, 2011
- Dec 15, 2011 The best needle ever Dec 15, 2011
- Dec 15, 2011 Solutions to the problem of too many freakin’ gifts Dec 15, 2011
- Dec 14, 2011 The perfect teacher gift Dec 14, 2011
- Dec 14, 2011 You just lost a customer, Lowes Dec 14, 2011
- Dec 13, 2011 A chink in my super hero armor Dec 13, 2011
- Dec 13, 2011 The stupidest thing that you can say when helping someone locate lost keys or a wallet or a phone Dec 13, 2011
- Dec 12, 2011 Interview my bully? I don't think so. Dec 12, 2011
- Dec 12, 2011 Time flies when you're creating? Dec 12, 2011
- Dec 11, 2011 No more goodie bags Dec 11, 2011
- Dec 11, 2011 The United States is comprised of exactly 50 states? I don't believe it. Dec 11, 2011
- Dec 10, 2011 Grand plans Dec 10, 2011
- Dec 10, 2011 In need of an alibi? Dec 10, 2011
- Dec 9, 2011 I finally found something I want for Christmas. Dec 9, 2011
- Dec 9, 2011 Satan at Christmas time Dec 9, 2011
- Dec 9, 2011 Young, thin and preferably blond Dec 9, 2011
- Dec 7, 2011 Buffering, procrastination and taunts from the mouth of a babe Dec 7, 2011
- Dec 7, 2011 My approach to the book tour: Part 2 Dec 7, 2011
- Dec 7, 2011 Our little Nutcracker ballerina Dec 7, 2011
- Dec 6, 2011 My approach to the book tour Dec 6, 2011
- Dec 5, 2011 Cute Thanksgiving Day photos Dec 5, 2011
- Dec 5, 2011 A reminder that some of the best gifts come in cheap packages. And in some case, the best gifts are actually cheap packaging. Dec 5, 2011
- Dec 5, 2011 This post-feminist world is confusing to me. Dec 5, 2011
- Dec 4, 2011 It’s got everything. Opposition to authority. A First Amendment battle. And the stupidity of the demanded apology. Dec 4, 2011
- Dec 3, 2011 Misery loves no company Dec 3, 2011
- Dec 3, 2011 Your greatest accomplishments probably mean nothing. Or they only meant something for a moment. Dec 3, 2011
- Dec 3, 2011 Mean, stupid teachers. Dec 3, 2011
- Dec 2, 2011 The worst thing I have ever done to my wife (unless she can think of something worse) Dec 2, 2011
- Dec 2, 2011 Taunting my inadequacy Dec 2, 2011
- Dec 1, 2011 A man invites friends to a tool party. Hammers and saws demonstrated and sold in his living room. The response would be universal. Dec 1, 2011
- Dec 1, 2011 Resolution update: November 2011 Dec 1, 2011
November 2011
- Nov 30, 2011 Parasite onboard Nov 30, 2011
- Nov 30, 2011 Brand new gift idea for that needy boy named Sue. Nov 30, 2011
- Nov 29, 2011 Triceratops Nov 29, 2011
- Nov 29, 2011 Observations from last night’s Moth StorySlam performance Nov 29, 2011
- Nov 28, 2011 Could someone please tell Michele Bachmann that whining about the source of your apology is not exactly Presidential Nov 28, 2011
- Nov 28, 2011 The Boogha Boogha Monster returns after more than two decades Nov 28, 2011
- Nov 27, 2011 You get 40 points just for breathing Nov 27, 2011
- Nov 27, 2011 Dressed up to not work out Nov 27, 2011
- Nov 26, 2011 Where does she learn these things? Nov 26, 2011
- Nov 26, 2011 Working hard for the money: Update Nov 26, 2011
- Nov 25, 2011 What I never told you about marriage Nov 25, 2011
- Nov 25, 2011 Goodnight dance Nov 25, 2011
- Nov 24, 2011 The maypole is kind of stupid. Right? Nov 24, 2011
- Nov 24, 2011 My first bit of Thanksgiving thanks Nov 24, 2011
- Nov 23, 2011 Coupons can’t terrorize anyone Nov 23, 2011
- Nov 23, 2011 Step in or step away? Nov 23, 2011
- Nov 22, 2011 No admittance Nov 22, 2011
- Nov 21, 2011 Is good parenting sometimes cruel parenting? Do the ends justify the means? Nov 21, 2011
- Nov 21, 2011 Best Nov 21, 2011
- Nov 20, 2011 MEMOIRS OF AN IMAGINARY FRIEND: Foreign news Nov 20, 2011
- Nov 19, 2011 Keeping it off Nov 19, 2011
- Nov 19, 2011 I’ve changed my mind. Cheese isn’t always good. Nov 19, 2011
- Nov 18, 2011 The still-awaiting-a-proper-title To-Do List #2 Nov 18, 2011
- Nov 18, 2011 This is not about God. It’s about a man’s ability to throw an oblong sphere through the air. That’s it. Nov 18, 2011
- Nov 18, 2011 Another perfect end to the day Nov 18, 2011
- Nov 17, 2011 You’ll share a bar of soap but not a pair of underwear? Nov 17, 2011
- Nov 17, 2011 Preparing for battle Nov 17, 2011
- Nov 16, 2011 Bronies: Another sign of the impending apocalypse Nov 16, 2011
- Nov 16, 2011 8 “shocking truths” about me Nov 16, 2011
- Nov 15, 2011 Weiner-Dicks agreement Nov 15, 2011
- Nov 15, 2011 Before Goodreads, there was Art Garfunkel Nov 15, 2011
- Nov 14, 2011 The pap smear’s biggest problem Nov 14, 2011
- Nov 13, 2011 The Clowns recap Nov 13, 2011
- Nov 12, 2011 What do Hannibal Lecter and I have in common? Nov 12, 2011
- Nov 12, 2011 This "most wondrous thing." A gift or a curse? Nov 12, 2011
- Nov 11, 2011 Yes, I work a lot. Yes, I have a lot of jobs. But look at all the empirical happiness they bring me. Nov 11, 2011
- Nov 11, 2011 French pastry expert Nov 11, 2011
- Nov 10, 2011 This is how I end almost everyday with my daughter. Lucky me. Nov 10, 2011
- Nov 10, 2011 Football is beautiful. Nov 10, 2011
- Nov 10, 2011 People are actually buying this. I checked. Nov 10, 2011
- Nov 9, 2011 My daughter thinks fall sucks, and justifiably so. Nov 9, 2011
- Nov 9, 2011 Don’t swing hard! Nov 9, 2011
- Nov 8, 2011 I’m actually a gentle, peace-loving, rather agreeable person. Nov 8, 2011
- Nov 8, 2011 I want this list, too, but I am too lazy to make it. Nov 8, 2011
- Nov 7, 2011 Julie Andrews trumps the Patriots Nov 7, 2011
- Nov 7, 2011 Fear not. There is a perfectly legal means for students and teachers to bully students different than them. Nov 7, 2011
- Nov 6, 2011 You can’t just say it’s art Nov 6, 2011
- Nov 5, 2011 Translation #2 Nov 5, 2011
- Nov 5, 2011 Guest post: An essay on the power of getting to know an author personally Nov 5, 2011
- Nov 4, 2011 My first marquee! Nov 4, 2011
- Nov 4, 2011 The awaiting-a-proper-title To-Do List #1 Nov 4, 2011
- Nov 4, 2011 The most mysterious and captivating 83 seconds of video on the Internet Nov 4, 2011
- Nov 3, 2011 Three principles to guarantee happiness Nov 3, 2011
- Nov 3, 2011 Two Whales Nov 3, 2011
- Nov 3, 2011 Translation Nov 3, 2011
- Nov 2, 2011 I don’t love sweets. Nov 2, 2011
- Nov 2, 2011 Stupid parents doing stupid things. Nov 2, 2011
- Nov 1, 2011 Resolution update: October 2011 Nov 1, 2011
- Nov 1, 2011 Post-Halloween brilliance Nov 1, 2011
- Nov 1, 2011 Her first letter was a V Nov 1, 2011
October 2011
- Oct 31, 2011 A tale of two storms Oct 31, 2011
- Oct 31, 2011 No need for toys Oct 31, 2011
- Oct 31, 2011 The Clowns final rehearsal Oct 31, 2011
- Oct 29, 2011 Freakin’ October 29th Oct 29, 2011
- Oct 29, 2011 Low self confidence makes people annoying Oct 29, 2011
- Oct 29, 2011 Confluence of cuteness Oct 29, 2011
- Oct 28, 2011 My successful evasion of police pursuit Oct 28, 2011
- Oct 27, 2011 How did you choose your career path? Or did your career path choose you? Oct 27, 2011
- Oct 27, 2011 Happy Daddy Oct 27, 2011
- Oct 26, 2011 Same world, different view of police officers Oct 26, 2011
- Oct 26, 2011 500 years ago was not that appealing Oct 26, 2011
- Oct 25, 2011 Martin Cooper kicked Alexander Graham Bell’s ass Oct 25, 2011
- Oct 25, 2011 What the hell was that supposed to mean? Oct 25, 2011
- Oct 25, 2011 Eerily accurate… Oct 25, 2011
- Oct 24, 2011 I would not have handled this situation nearly as well Oct 24, 2011
- Oct 24, 2011 It’s 6:00 on a Saturday morning. Are you awake? Oct 24, 2011
- Oct 24, 2011 Not nice Oct 24, 2011
- Oct 23, 2011 I couldn't read the word "the" Oct 23, 2011
- Oct 23, 2011 Future writer? Or perhaps an editor? Oct 23, 2011
- Oct 22, 2011 Maybe this preschool is worth the cost after all… Oct 22, 2011
- Oct 22, 2011 Have you ever seen a more beautiful sunrise? Oct 22, 2011
- Oct 22, 2011 A lost wedding ring, an unfriendly receptionist and peeing in the wrong place Oct 22, 2011
- Oct 21, 2011 Suggested revisions to religious services (and an offer to lead your congregation to happiness) Oct 21, 2011
- Oct 21, 2011 What apple? Oct 21, 2011
- Oct 20, 2011 Nothing makes me happier… Oct 20, 2011
- Oct 19, 2011 Three suspect descriptors Oct 19, 2011
- Oct 19, 2011 Thoughts from my first Moth GrandSLAM Oct 19, 2011
- Oct 18, 2011 The Moon sucks Oct 18, 2011
- Oct 16, 2011 Draw a Stickman: A waste of time well spent Oct 16, 2011
- Oct 15, 2011 Impressed. Briefly. Oct 15, 2011
- Oct 15, 2011 Getting noticed Oct 15, 2011
- Oct 14, 2011 Best to-do list ever Oct 14, 2011
- Oct 14, 2011 This video made me laugh, but it strikes fear in my heart as a father and teacher, too. Oct 14, 2011
- Oct 13, 2011 Fatherless. Thanks a lot, Transformers. Oct 13, 2011
- Oct 13, 2011 I deny all knowledge of her outlandish accusations Oct 13, 2011
- Oct 13, 2011 First carrousel ride Oct 13, 2011
- Oct 12, 2011 Women need not consume Oct 12, 2011
- Oct 12, 2011 What do lobsters and cul-de-sacs have in common? Oct 12, 2011
- Oct 11, 2011 Our favorite video of all time Oct 11, 2011
- Oct 10, 2011 Tears of joy Oct 10, 2011
- Oct 10, 2011 It’s easy to be self-righteous and stupid when you’ve never known hunger Oct 10, 2011
- Oct 9, 2011 Everything I wrote before the age of 30 was terrible Oct 9, 2011
- Oct 9, 2011 Lunchbox notes for the ladies Oct 9, 2011
- Oct 7, 2011 Nervous Oct 7, 2011
- Oct 7, 2011 Boy learns that Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father for the first time Oct 7, 2011
- Oct 6, 2011 The super cool 1987 version of myself Oct 6, 2011
- Oct 5, 2011 I understand why you think this is about you, but it’s probably not about you at all. Oct 5, 2011
- Oct 5, 2011 Our childhood revealed (and another goal achieved) Oct 5, 2011
- Oct 4, 2011 Time bomb Oct 4, 2011
- Oct 4, 2011 Whoopi Goldberg apparently just learned yesterday that the N-word is considered offensive to some people. She’s also apparently an idiot. Oct 4, 2011
- Oct 4, 2011 The moral high ground Oct 4, 2011
- Oct 3, 2011 A near-perfect assemblage of words to describe the fabulousness of roller derby Oct 3, 2011
- Oct 3, 2011 Naked donut run or embarrassing tattoo on your bottom? Oct 3, 2011
- Oct 2, 2011 Bittersweet Oct 2, 2011
- Oct 1, 2011 Resolution update: September 2011 Oct 1, 2011
- Oct 1, 2011 Before getting married, ask yourself this: Oct 1, 2011
- Oct 1, 2011 Elmo Oct 1, 2011
September 2011
- Sep 30, 2011 Marcel Proust’s childhood sucked Sep 30, 2011
- Sep 30, 2011 Andy Rooney and I have similar thoughts on sleep Sep 30, 2011
- Sep 29, 2011 Not exactly potty training… Sep 29, 2011
- Sep 29, 2011 My solution to the soul-crushing nature of meetings Sep 29, 2011
- Sep 28, 2011 Male self-deception is a beautiful thing. Sincerely. Sep 28, 2011
- Sep 28, 2011 My new favorite Clara photo Sep 28, 2011
- Sep 27, 2011 The Moth and The Clowns: Save the dates Sep 27, 2011
- Sep 27, 2011 Most embarrassing golf shot ever Sep 27, 2011
- Sep 27, 2011 A bouquet of amusing words Sep 27, 2011
- Sep 26, 2011 Bumble-Ardy lives again Sep 26, 2011
- Sep 26, 2011 Are digital wedding invitations acceptable? Sep 26, 2011
- Sep 25, 2011 The curse of the hyper productive Sep 25, 2011
- Sep 25, 2011 Such joy! Sep 25, 2011
- Sep 24, 2011 Juggling? Sep 24, 2011
- Sep 24, 2011 Homework blues start early Sep 24, 2011
- Sep 23, 2011 I loved kickboxing. Kickboxing did not love me. Sep 23, 2011
- Sep 23, 2011 Cracked ribs, cracked shmibs Sep 23, 2011
- Sep 21, 2011 An addendum to my list of flaws and shortcomings Sep 21, 2011
- Sep 21, 2011 An acceptable alternative to everlasting life Sep 21, 2011
- Sep 20, 2011 Dinner and a fashion statement Sep 20, 2011
- Sep 20, 2011 Why we don’t own an iPad Sep 20, 2011
- Sep 19, 2011 Football in every direction Sep 19, 2011
- Sep 18, 2011 This is the best they could do? Sep 18, 2011
- Sep 18, 2011 Hopefully there’s more to his marketing strategy than this Sep 18, 2011
- Sep 17, 2011 Gay fraternal lovers? Sep 17, 2011
- Sep 17, 2011 Chew-chew-chew Sep 17, 2011
- Sep 16, 2011 Shortcomings and Flaws: 2011 Sep 16, 2011
- Sep 16, 2011 Grocery stores and courthouses: Excellent places for first dates Sep 16, 2011
- Sep 15, 2011 Dodging sleep at an early age Sep 15, 2011
- Sep 14, 2011 Dinner will never be so fun again! Sep 14, 2011
- Sep 14, 2011 Writers can teach each other a lot, but not this. Sep 14, 2011
- Sep 14, 2011 I don’t agree with him, but I can respect his answer Sep 14, 2011
- Sep 13, 2011 Dickens and Dicks Sep 13, 2011
- Sep 13, 2011 Buttered side up, thank goodness Sep 13, 2011
- Sep 12, 2011 Heroes of 9/11 whose names should be better known Sep 12, 2011
- Sep 12, 2011 The complications of marrying a Jewish woman Sep 12, 2011
- Sep 11, 2011 Sunday morning epiphany Sep 11, 2011
- Sep 11, 2011 A teacher’s memory of 9/11 Sep 11, 2011
- Sep 9, 2011 Not many people could make it through this chart Sep 9, 2011
- Sep 9, 2011 Tag me in, reality television stars! I'm ready to fight! Sep 9, 2011
- Sep 8, 2011 Stop complimenting students Sep 8, 2011
- Sep 7, 2011 Near death is a gift. If you survive, of course. Sep 7, 2011
- Sep 7, 2011 Watership Down's Hazel is a glorious but sadly unrealistic nonconformist Sep 7, 2011
- Sep 6, 2011 Your title sucks, and your ideas about food are sexist and condescending Sep 6, 2011
- Sep 6, 2011 Clothing adds at least five pounds. Sep 6, 2011
- Sep 5, 2011 Tilly and the Wall: Who needs a drummer when you have tap shoes? Sep 5, 2011
- Sep 5, 2011 Ready for fifth grade Sep 5, 2011
- Sep 4, 2011 Extreme teaching, including home invasion and theft Sep 4, 2011
- Sep 3, 2011 Kissing tiny feet Sep 3, 2011
- Sep 3, 2011 Everything dies. I get it. Sep 3, 2011
- Sep 2, 2011 Don’t trust a good name when it's too good. Sep 2, 2011
- Sep 2, 2011 When choosing a spouse, acceptance isn’t enough. Sep 2, 2011
- Sep 1, 2011 Making great use of our Hurricane Irene entrapment Sep 1, 2011
- Sep 1, 2011 Resolution update: August 2011 Sep 1, 2011
August 2011
- Aug 31, 2011 Taking after Daddy Aug 31, 2011
- Aug 31, 2011 A new plan for dealing with the never-ending coffee clichés Aug 31, 2011
- Aug 30, 2011 Hurricane Irene on the tongue Aug 30, 2011
- Aug 30, 2011 Your words are doing more harm than good Aug 30, 2011
- Aug 29, 2011 No buyer’s remorse here. Aug 29, 2011
- Aug 29, 2011 Amorphous, blabbering blobs do not sell books: Learning to write physical description Aug 29, 2011
- Aug 29, 2011 Spitting in the eye of Hurricane Irene Aug 29, 2011
- Aug 28, 2011 We had some storm damage after all Aug 28, 2011
- Aug 28, 2011 One of these things are not like the other Aug 28, 2011
- Aug 28, 2011 The lesson: You can kill mothers, fathers, and children galore. But don’t ever kill the dog. Aug 28, 2011
- Aug 27, 2011 Convenience would be a shoe shine boy and a bidet. Not an unlocked door. Aug 27, 2011
- Aug 27, 2011 Feeling uncertain about my chest Aug 27, 2011
- Aug 26, 2011 The Wikipedia entry on "receptionist" is fascinating. Little did I know that it would lead me to the body of Christ. Aug 26, 2011
- Aug 26, 2011 Friends don’t let friends post creepy video messages on the Internet to women half their age Aug 26, 2011
- Aug 25, 2011 Kitchen disco! Aug 25, 2011
- Aug 25, 2011 Help me choose my column for McSweeney’s Aug 25, 2011
- Aug 24, 2011 What is your favorite number? Favorite color? Aug 24, 2011
- Aug 24, 2011 Is this sufficient visual evidence to determine a person’s IQ? Aug 24, 2011
- Aug 23, 2011 Stop counting words Aug 23, 2011
- Aug 23, 2011 Overwhelming evidence of insanity Aug 23, 2011
- Aug 22, 2011 TV can be as healthy as carrots and jumping jacks Aug 22, 2011
- Aug 22, 2011 The office jerk. Death by television. The curse of the agreeable worker. All good news for me. Aug 22, 2011
- Aug 22, 2011 Author Laurie Halse Anderson and I have eerily similar mindsets. Except I think the universe wants me dead. Aug 22, 2011
- Aug 21, 2011 I am a small and insignificant person by comparison Aug 21, 2011
- Aug 20, 2011 Please don’t taint our trashy brand name with your douchebaggery Aug 20, 2011
- Aug 20, 2011 Anne Hathaway rapping as Lil’ Wayne Aug 20, 2011
- Aug 19, 2011 “Mother may I, Mr. Brady?” Aug 19, 2011
- Aug 19, 2011 In need of a new theme song Aug 19, 2011
- Aug 19, 2011 Why lift weights and run when you can fuse with your gym towel? Aug 19, 2011
- Aug 18, 2011 An admittedly heated response about the notion that a librarian can't read Shakespeare Aug 18, 2011
- Aug 18, 2011 Everything’s wrong. Aug 18, 2011
- Aug 18, 2011 Wikipedia: I could read this stuff all day long Aug 18, 2011
- Aug 17, 2011 Protecting your KRAFT Macaroni & Cheese Aug 17, 2011
- Aug 17, 2011 “Nobody puts baby in the corner” changes ever-so-slightly with fatherhood Aug 17, 2011
- Aug 17, 2011 718 words on 13 words: A literary analysis and deconstruction of my daughter’s very first story. Aug 17, 2011
- Aug 16, 2011 My wife’s reaction to my latest idea was predicable and understandable. Aug 16, 2011
- Aug 16, 2011 Clara Dicks’s first original story Aug 16, 2011
- Aug 15, 2011 A messy ABC Aug 15, 2011
- Aug 15, 2011 What would you tell your pregnant self? My three suggestions. Aug 15, 2011
- Aug 14, 2011 You called me an idiot. You said I acted like a bully. You told me that I was cruel. I respond. Aug 14, 2011
- Aug 14, 2011 Authors should not meet their editors at baseball games with pee-stained shorts Aug 14, 2011
- Aug 13, 2011 A sequel to Something Missing: Martin Railsback, FBI tactical operations double agent Aug 13, 2011
- Aug 13, 2011 When an overly slow driver pulls to the side of the road to allow you to pass, even though you are driving the speed limit, what is a man to do? Here’s one idea: Aug 13, 2011
- Aug 12, 2011 The Clowns: One step closer to reality Aug 12, 2011
- Aug 12, 2011 If it’s important and it’s lacking, TEACH IT. Aug 12, 2011
- Aug 11, 2011 Is a bologna, cheese, and catsup sandwich reason enough to run away from home? Aug 11, 2011
- Aug 11, 2011 Weeping cat owners require segregation Aug 11, 2011
- Aug 10, 2011 Should schools stop releasing their honor rolls for publication in order to protect the feelings of students not included on the list? Aug 10, 2011
- Aug 10, 2011 How to deliver a wedding toast Aug 10, 2011
- Aug 9, 2011 The double-take instead of the long gaze Aug 9, 2011
- Aug 9, 2011 Two new jobs I’m looking to add to my collection of jobs: Double date companion and grave site visitor Aug 9, 2011
- Aug 8, 2011 Pebbles aren’t good enough for my little one Aug 8, 2011
- Aug 8, 2011 Disappointment can be entertaining when you aren’t the one being disappointed Aug 8, 2011
- Aug 8, 2011 One in five Americans smoke. Where the hell are they? And it would appear that Mad Men gets it very wrong when it comes to smoking. Aug 8, 2011
- Aug 7, 2011 The Girl Who Hated to Swing Aug 7, 2011
- Aug 7, 2011 You have to be having sex in order to choose your phone over sex. I know this sounds obvious, but apparently it’s not. Aug 7, 2011
- Aug 6, 2011 Simple pleasures Aug 6, 2011
- Aug 6, 2011 The most common and egregious of all leadership flaws Aug 6, 2011
- Aug 5, 2011 A new writer has taken the stage. Go forth and see what she has to say! Aug 5, 2011
- Aug 5, 2011 It is perfectly acceptable to question a teacher’s judgment in the case of a serial killer. Aug 5, 2011
- Aug 4, 2011 I see dead people. Occasionally. Usually in restaurants. Aug 4, 2011
- Aug 4, 2011 Childhood hunger strikes fail to initiate change but perhaps define a life Aug 4, 2011
- Aug 4, 2011 Ominous automobiles and probable getaway cars Aug 4, 2011
- Aug 3, 2011 A bunny and a super hero: A sordid tale of unlikely love Aug 3, 2011
- Aug 3, 2011 A convergence of fabulousness Aug 3, 2011
- Aug 3, 2011 The ones who fell out of the back of the pickup trucks are dead. Worse, they are forgotten. Aug 3, 2011
- Aug 2, 2011 Pretty and precious Aug 2, 2011
- Aug 2, 2011 Is being a woman like living in Shark Week all the time? Aug 2, 2011
- Aug 2, 2011 The Star Wars theme song. Sung in French. And that’s not actually the most frightening part. Aug 2, 2011
- Aug 1, 2011 Cat allowed. Daddy not. Aug 1, 2011
- Aug 1, 2011 My simple but effective solution to the idiots who text in the movie theater Aug 1, 2011
July 2011
- Jul 31, 2011 Three simple rules to guarantee a successful wedding Jul 31, 2011
- Jul 31, 2011 A homemade electric chair is probably overkill. Literally. Jul 31, 2011
- Jul 31, 2011 Resolution update: July 2011 Jul 31, 2011
- Jul 30, 2011 Um… climate change is not real because the Moon has volcanoes, too. Right? Jul 30, 2011
- Jul 30, 2011 Who knew that erectile dysfunction could be so captivating and suspenseful? Jul 30, 2011
- Jul 30, 2011 The most looked-up words of 2011: How many do you know? Jul 30, 2011
- Jul 29, 2011 Most improbable moment in Hollywood history comes from the classic film The Goonies Jul 29, 2011
- Jul 29, 2011 Interviewing for Google: What would your answer to "the hard question" be? Jul 29, 2011
- Jul 28, 2011 Come to the Show! Jul 28, 2011
- Jul 28, 2011 A business arrangement involving stickers Jul 28, 2011
- Jul 27, 2011 An evening of challenging questions and fabulous gifts in Lebanon, CT Jul 27, 2011
- Jul 27, 2011 My daughter recognized me as an author for the first time. I'll never forget it. Jul 27, 2011
- Jul 27, 2011 I still support ferocity Jul 27, 2011
- Jul 26, 2011 A girl who takes care of her cat will surely take care of her elderly parents. Right? Jul 26, 2011
- Jul 26, 2011 McDonald’s makes Happy Meals healthier, regardless of The Daily Beast’s uncertainty over the matter Jul 26, 2011
- Jul 26, 2011 Rhinos and lions and left-handers, oh my! Jul 26, 2011
- Jul 25, 2011 Winnie the Pooh aborted. Too damn frightening. Jul 25, 2011
- Jul 25, 2011 Colorforms teach important life lessons about the limitations of caregivers and the importance of suppressing your feelings. Jul 25, 2011
- Jul 24, 2011 Chatting with your ex-wife at a football game or marrying your ex-wife’s first husband. Which is worse? Jul 24, 2011
- Jul 24, 2011 Excellent first impression Jul 24, 2011
- Jul 24, 2011 Respect yourself and shut up. Jul 24, 2011
- Jul 23, 2011 New business idea: Rorschach tee-shirts Jul 23, 2011
- Jul 23, 2011 St. John Eyre Rivers is a single-minded jackass, but I love him just the same Jul 23, 2011
- Jul 22, 2011 My Moth story (or as close an approximation of the story as I can muster) Jul 22, 2011
- Jul 22, 2011 Populating the bathroom with antiques and curiosities Jul 22, 2011
- Jul 21, 2011 A sign of tattoos to come? Jul 21, 2011
- Jul 21, 2011 Poor Jane Eyre. She’s been hungry for a whole 19 hours. Jul 21, 2011
- Jul 21, 2011 Not-so-secret secrets to sleep Jul 21, 2011
- Jul 20, 2011 Did you know that Jane Eyre is a superhero? Or perhaps a mutant? Or an alien? Or maybe even a werewolf? But with super powers nonetheless. Jul 20, 2011
- Jul 20, 2011 My obituary and eulogy instructions Jul 20, 2011
- Jul 19, 2011 Blue Stripy is my favorite pair of underwear. What’s yours? Jul 19, 2011
- Jul 19, 2011 The mystery of net carbs, the most redundant name in human history and inexplicable online gaming, all in a bottle of 4C iced tea Jul 19, 2011
- Jul 18, 2011 Harry Potter wants my wife Jul 18, 2011
- Jul 18, 2011 Unequal footing and a first peek into St. Martin’s Press Jul 18, 2011
- Jul 18, 2011 Elmo says, “Pick me! Pick me!” Jul 18, 2011
- Jul 17, 2011 I hate mulligans Jul 17, 2011
- Jul 17, 2011 Women stick together at every age Jul 17, 2011
- Jul 16, 2011 Are writers’ colonies good for writing or simply indulgent escape mechanisms for the undisciplined? Jul 16, 2011
- Jul 15, 2011 Public marriage proposal: FAIL Jul 15, 2011
- Jul 15, 2011 Black and invisible Jul 15, 2011
- Jul 14, 2011 My philosophy of parenting: Ferocity required Jul 14, 2011
- Jul 14, 2011 Teachers need to learn to be publicists, too. Jul 14, 2011
- Jul 13, 2011 Last night’s Moth audience, courtesy of Dan Kennedy Jul 13, 2011
- Jul 13, 2011 I won The Moth StorySlam last night, and I still can’t believe it. Jul 13, 2011
- Jul 12, 2011 My petty little slice of Facebook hell Jul 12, 2011
- Jul 12, 2011 Desperately seeing an Ocean’s 11 answer Jul 12, 2011
- Jul 11, 2011 Bachmann’s latest history lesson. This time on slavery. Jul 11, 2011
- Jul 11, 2011 Douchebags Make it Douchy For Non-Douchebags to Wear Watches Jul 11, 2011
- Jul 11, 2011 An archeological moment in the making Jul 11, 2011
- Jul 10, 2011 Dance party or deadly ambush? Jul 10, 2011
- Jul 10, 2011 If you are going to perpetrate a fraud, please don’t be stupid about it. Jul 10, 2011
- Jul 9, 2011 7 unexpected lessons learned during my first children’s book writing group meeting Jul 9, 2011
- Jul 9, 2011 Frisbee is still a challenge… Jul 9, 2011
- Jul 8, 2011 Rethinking my assault on the institution of coffee Jul 8, 2011
- Jul 8, 2011 7 perfectly good reasons why the use of a tanning booth is acceptable Jul 8, 2011
- Jul 8, 2011 Doing the impossible. Jul 8, 2011
- Jul 7, 2011 My personal assault on the institution of coffee Jul 7, 2011
- Jul 7, 2011 An end to their blasted chirping Jul 7, 2011
- Jul 7, 2011 Smothered by love Jul 7, 2011
- Jul 6, 2011 Redundant, and therefore stupid, ad copy. Jul 6, 2011
- Jul 6, 2011 Don't let your child move back home. Period. Jul 6, 2011
- Jul 6, 2011 I only enjoy reality television when it’s imported from Korea Jul 6, 2011
- Jul 5, 2011 Hands off my little girl, buster! Jul 5, 2011
- Jul 5, 2011 Check out my body. Regularly. Jul 5, 2011
- Jul 4, 2011 This movie poster might be better than the book and the film. And the movie is great. Jul 4, 2011
- Jul 4, 2011 Pancakes and a geometry lesson Jul 4, 2011
- Jul 3, 2011 Relax, lady. It’s a picture book and it’s funny. Jul 3, 2011
- Jul 3, 2011 Cheerio on board Jul 3, 2011
- Jul 2, 2011 Get a second job. Jul 2, 2011
- Jul 2, 2011 Girl at fence Jul 2, 2011
- Jul 1, 2011 I can make even the most hardened FBI agent crazy Jul 1, 2011
- Jul 1, 2011 Resolution update: June 2011 Jul 1, 2011
June 2011
- Jun 30, 2011 Revising seventeenth century essayists for the better Jun 30, 2011
- Jun 30, 2011 Our own little sweatshop Jun 30, 2011
- Jun 30, 2011 Once is fine. But this is a pattern of stupidity. Jun 30, 2011
- Jun 29, 2011 Unforgettable duet Jun 29, 2011
- Jun 29, 2011 The world is a strange, strange place Jun 29, 2011
- Jun 28, 2011 Look! Another politician can’t simply admit to making a historical mistake. Jun 28, 2011
- Jun 28, 2011 I walk like a duck. And perhaps it’s how I should be playing golf, too. And maybe I should just quit. Jun 28, 2011
- Jun 28, 2011 Five rules to guarantee a successful the public marriage proposal Jun 28, 2011
- Jun 27, 2011 The stupidest simile in the whole wide world Jun 27, 2011
- Jun 27, 2011 The celebratory graduation bedsheet has gone too far Jun 27, 2011
- Jun 26, 2011 Blessed innocence Jun 26, 2011
- Jun 26, 2011 Greatest turnaround of all-time Jun 26, 2011
- Jun 25, 2011 What not to wear Jun 25, 2011
- Jun 25, 2011 How much television do you watch? Jun 25, 2011
- Jun 24, 2011 Should my students be allowed to make fun of me online? Jun 24, 2011
- Jun 24, 2011 Stop writing me off Jun 24, 2011
- Jun 23, 2011 My worst teaching mistake ever Jun 23, 2011
- Jun 23, 2011 A clever manipulation of bathroom reading material Jun 23, 2011
- Jun 22, 2011 Perhaps the Girl Scouts don’t need me after all Jun 22, 2011
- Jun 22, 2011 Sucks to be a Sprite drinker Jun 22, 2011
- Jun 21, 2011 General maintenance required Jun 21, 2011
- Jun 21, 2011 Singular talent absent opportunity Jun 21, 2011
- Jun 20, 2011 This hurts my heart Jun 20, 2011
- Jun 20, 2011 Father’s Day 2011 Jun 20, 2011
- Jun 19, 2011 Three new Father’s Day laws Jun 19, 2011
- Jun 19, 2011 Father’s Day is perfectly placed on the calendar Jun 19, 2011
- Jun 18, 2011 Bugaboo is stupid. Uppababy rules. I’m writing about baby strollers. The world must be coming to an end. Jun 18, 2011
- Jun 17, 2011 Lions should not be allowed to pretend to eat little children Jun 17, 2011
- Jun 17, 2011 Overreacting to a little pee Jun 17, 2011
- Jun 16, 2011 The people who will die first in a zombie apocalypse Jun 16, 2011
- Jun 16, 2011 The Bruins win! It’s kind of depressing. Jun 16, 2011
- Jun 14, 2011 Picture equals words Jun 14, 2011
- Jun 14, 2011 Pure genius! Jun 14, 2011
- Jun 14, 2011 Three lessons learned from Dicks Jun 14, 2011
- Jun 13, 2011 It’s not the song (which is great), but the time and station that matter most Jun 13, 2011
- Jun 13, 2011 Cowardly punks deserve to lose the NBA championship Jun 13, 2011
- Jun 13, 2011 The letter E and the letter F Jun 13, 2011
- Jun 12, 2011 “A friend in need is a friend indeed” is more complicated than it appears. Jun 12, 2011
- Jun 12, 2011 More problems with Dicks Jun 12, 2011
- Jun 11, 2011 My single statement Jun 11, 2011
- Jun 11, 2011 New favorite photos Jun 11, 2011
- Jun 10, 2011 Avoiding trouble through clever wordplay Jun 10, 2011
- Jun 10, 2011 The rules of golf: Remove shrapnel from the course, take cover during bombing runs and take a free drop if your ball is destroyed by enemy action Jun 10, 2011
- Jun 9, 2011 Not everything about Curious George is good. Jun 9, 2011
- Jun 9, 2011 Generation gap Jun 9, 2011
- Jun 8, 2011 A lot of great news, but the vomit trumps it all Jun 8, 2011
- Jun 8, 2011 Jon Stewart read my blog and stole my bit. Jun 8, 2011
- Jun 8, 2011 Please let these be real. Please let these be real. Jun 8, 2011
- Jun 7, 2011 Sadly, no ducks or deer but lots of old people Jun 7, 2011
- Jun 7, 2011 An awkward moment involving a teenage girl, a Dixie cup, pee and me Jun 7, 2011
- Jun 7, 2011 Three movies in three days Jun 7, 2011
- Jun 6, 2011 Too cool for school Jun 6, 2011
- Jun 6, 2011 Sarah Palin teaches 5 important life lessons Jun 6, 2011
- Jun 5, 2011 Mind is playing tricks on me. On purpose. Jun 5, 2011
- Jun 4, 2011 Genius or insanity Jun 4, 2011
- Jun 4, 2011 A serious lack of air pressure Jun 4, 2011
- Jun 3, 2011 The Moth: Help me tell my story Jun 3, 2011
- Jun 2, 2011 Shame on you, humanity Jun 2, 2011
- Jun 2, 2011 My life trajectory in Sesame Street terms Jun 2, 2011
- Jun 1, 2011 Staying busy instead of sleeping Jun 1, 2011
- Jun 1, 2011 Old school with a fever Jun 1, 2011
- Jun 1, 2011 Singular and centered Jun 1, 2011
May 2011
- May 31, 2011 Resolution update: May 2011 May 31, 2011
- May 31, 2011 Disappointed that billions haven’t died? May 31, 2011
- May 31, 2011 Super Grover playing Saint Peter? May 31, 2011
- May 30, 2011 Serious daddy fail May 30, 2011
- May 30, 2011 Dishonoring the dead with stupidity May 30, 2011
- May 30, 2011 Your sense of smell or your cell phone? May 30, 2011
- May 29, 2011 Angry, hilarious outbursts May 29, 2011
- May 29, 2011 Chasing fire engines May 29, 2011
- May 28, 2011 Is downhill downhill or downhill? May 28, 2011
- May 28, 2011 How to be pretty May 28, 2011
- May 27, 2011 Me? Or a muzzled version of me? May 27, 2011
- May 27, 2011 Why today's video games suck May 27, 2011
- May 26, 2011 Introducing Matthew Green May 26, 2011
- May 26, 2011 The Rapture. Part II. May 26, 2011
- May 25, 2011 Explanation at last May 25, 2011
- May 25, 2011 The Author's Prayer May 25, 2011
- May 24, 2011 I have never been treated by an OB/GYN but I have an opinion on the subject nonetheless May 24, 2011
- May 24, 2011 Unacceptable platitude #3: “That’s your opinion.” May 24, 2011
- May 23, 2011 Raptured! May 23, 2011
- May 23, 2011 Ice cream for dinner! May 23, 2011
- May 22, 2011 Death to the elephants May 22, 2011
- May 21, 2011 Unprofitable near-death experiences May 21, 2011
- May 20, 2011 Spared his life May 20, 2011
- May 20, 2011 Is this version any less likely? May 20, 2011
- May 20, 2011 I couldn’t have said it any better, and that makes me so angry May 20, 2011
- May 20, 2011 Bringing the May 21 rapture to life! May 20, 2011
- May 19, 2011 Our new favorite photograph May 19, 2011
- May 19, 2011 Unacceptable platitude #2: “Nobody’s perfect.” May 19, 2011
- May 19, 2011 My new hero and heroine May 19, 2011
- May 18, 2011 Unacceptable platitude #1: “At least I admit my flaws.” May 18, 2011
- May 18, 2011 Be careful for the big, fast choo-choo train May 18, 2011
- May 17, 2011 X marks the spot? May 17, 2011
- May 17, 2011 Puddle jumping May 17, 2011
- May 17, 2011 Not the best tribute to firefighters May 17, 2011
- May 16, 2011 The damning and the damned May 16, 2011
- May 16, 2011 I wished minor injury on my daughter. Am I a bad father? May 16, 2011
- May 15, 2011 The single redeeming moment from a classically bad 1980’s sitcom May 15, 2011
- May 15, 2011 Hillary Clinton is sexually suggestive? May 15, 2011
- May 14, 2011 June 25: Be there. May 14, 2011
- May 14, 2011 No nightmares. Just swinish jurisprudence. May 14, 2011
- May 13, 2011 Cigarettes and corn dogs make me feel great May 13, 2011
- May 13, 2011 Bathroom sculpture May 13, 2011
- May 12, 2011 Her very own sidekick! She must be stopped! May 12, 2011
- May 12, 2011 But I’ll take this, too. May 12, 2011
- May 11, 2011 I want this real, real bad. May 11, 2011
- May 11, 2011 This list totally sucks May 11, 2011
- May 11, 2011 Daytime television at its best May 11, 2011
- May 10, 2011 Matthew Dicks: Under arrest May 10, 2011
- May 10, 2011 The rejection of a nickname should be a red flag May 10, 2011
- May 10, 2011 Lessons from Irving and Franzen May 10, 2011
- May 9, 2011 Creative, cruel and clever May 9, 2011
- May 9, 2011 Kids make me sound stupid May 9, 2011
- May 9, 2011 It's never enough. May 9, 2011
- May 8, 2011 Not a happy day May 8, 2011
- May 8, 2011 Significant fringe benefits May 8, 2011
- May 8, 2011 New favorites May 8, 2011
- May 7, 2011 "Nice guy" is the kiss of death May 7, 2011
- May 7, 2011 And the winner is? May 7, 2011
- May 6, 2011 There is only one appropriate and respectful time to host a toddler’s birthday party and to say otherwise is just stupid and poopy May 6, 2011
- May 6, 2011 You can celebrate Bin Laden’s death, but only if your celebration conforms to the celebratory bell curve May 6, 2011
- May 5, 2011 4 truths about sneakers May 5, 2011
- May 5, 2011 Too much information prior to peeing May 5, 2011
- May 4, 2011 I have failed as a teacher May 4, 2011
- May 4, 2011 All My Children and my mom May 4, 2011
- May 3, 2011 Does knowing the author make the book better? May 3, 2011
- May 3, 2011 Resolution update: April 2011 May 3, 2011
- May 2, 2011 No sleep for the most responsible May 2, 2011
- May 2, 2011 Help. My wife might be drinking carpet cleaner. May 2, 2011
- May 1, 2011 If you can’t spell, you look like a moron. And you make other people look like morons, too. May 1, 2011
- May 1, 2011 Top 10 moments from the Mommy convention May 1, 2011
April 2011
- Apr 30, 2011 Michael Scott’s final words deserved to be heard Apr 30, 2011
- Apr 30, 2011 Not the friends I want Apr 30, 2011
- Apr 29, 2011 Henry Blake and Michael Scott: Thankfully not as intertwined as I (and many others) had feared Apr 29, 2011
- Apr 29, 2011 The Facebook like button gender gap Apr 29, 2011
- Apr 28, 2011 Devil on the rise Apr 28, 2011
- Apr 28, 2011 McDonald’s and Charlie Sheen would be bad titles, too Apr 28, 2011
- Apr 27, 2011 This is how moms want to spend their weekend? Apr 27, 2011
- Apr 27, 2011 A proposal in an author’s acknowledgements? How do I top this one? Apr 27, 2011
- Apr 26, 2011 No exaggeration Apr 26, 2011
- Apr 26, 2011 If only they were real… Apr 26, 2011
- Apr 26, 2011 Professional best man for hire Apr 26, 2011
- Apr 25, 2011 Super Grover to the rescue Apr 25, 2011
- Apr 25, 2011 Can the wisdom of the near-death experience be passed on without the experience itself? Apr 25, 2011
- Apr 25, 2011 Thanks you, Laura Numeroff and Felicia Bond, for saving me from my own stupidity Apr 25, 2011
- Apr 24, 2011 Subtly ignored Apr 24, 2011
- Apr 24, 2011 Top 10 post-wedding thoughts Apr 24, 2011
- Apr 23, 2011 You made that look easy, George. Well played, sir. Apr 23, 2011
- Apr 23, 2011 You are probably a better judge of “interesting or unusual” than me Apr 23, 2011
- Apr 23, 2011 Full contact yoga? Apr 23, 2011
- Apr 22, 2011 Best book club ever Apr 22, 2011
- Apr 22, 2011 Shut up, Teacher Man. Apr 22, 2011
- Apr 22, 2011 Titanic under the big top Apr 22, 2011
- Apr 21, 2011 Han Solo still rules. Even if he is a murderer. Apr 21, 2011
- Apr 21, 2011 My talk included wishing for the death of an elderly woman and the apparent arrival of her ghost Apr 21, 2011
- Apr 21, 2011 My first date/arranged marriage Apr 21, 2011
- Apr 20, 2011 Directions damaging my ego Apr 20, 2011
- Apr 20, 2011 Is the absence of women writers in late night comedy a result of sexism or simply female preference? Apr 20, 2011
- Apr 19, 2011 I don’t care about stuff. Apr 19, 2011
- Apr 18, 2011 The definition of self-indulgence Apr 18, 2011
- Apr 18, 2011 My ugly golf swing Apr 18, 2011
- Apr 17, 2011 Feminine hygiene products meet SOMETHING MISSING Apr 17, 2011
- Apr 17, 2011 Plastic beats paper Apr 17, 2011
- Apr 17, 2011 Tough beyond measure Apr 17, 2011
- Apr 16, 2011 Wouldn’t you rather watch me clip my toenails? Apr 16, 2011
- Apr 16, 2011 A dramatic reading of Gwyneth Paltrow’s cookbook Apr 16, 2011
- Apr 15, 2011 Killer tornados not OK Apr 15, 2011
- Apr 15, 2011 I do not understand teenagers who fail to rebel Apr 15, 2011
- Apr 14, 2011 In defense of revision Apr 14, 2011
- Apr 14, 2011 Visual representation of a specific human emotion Apr 14, 2011
- Apr 13, 2011 Defending my biography Apr 13, 2011
- Apr 13, 2011 Don’t upset the French. Apr 13, 2011
- Apr 12, 2011 Spring has sprung Apr 12, 2011
- Apr 12, 2011 Pugnacious, happily-married Franklin-like contemporary of Jennifer Egan Apr 12, 2011
- Apr 11, 2011 No limits on royalty. Or milk. Apr 11, 2011
- Apr 11, 2011 First time in history that “Cleanest teeth” isn’t so great Apr 11, 2011
- Apr 10, 2011 Totally hitting on me Apr 10, 2011
- Apr 10, 2011 Top 10 ideas about books Apr 10, 2011
- Apr 9, 2011 Joy in other’s unfortunate desire to sleep Apr 9, 2011
- Apr 9, 2011 Apology conundrum Apr 9, 2011
- Apr 8, 2011 I don’t know how to explain this to my daughter either Apr 8, 2011
- Apr 8, 2011 The real end to Dead Poet’s Society Apr 8, 2011
- Apr 7, 2011 Enough with this cliché Apr 7, 2011
- Apr 7, 2011 The emailed thank you note: The sign of an advanced civilization Apr 7, 2011
- Apr 6, 2011 Seriously? Apr 6, 2011
- Apr 6, 2011 I have a new job. Apr 6, 2011
- Apr 5, 2011 Unfaithful unicorn with a mix tape Apr 5, 2011
- Apr 5, 2011 Assigning my students new (and sometimes permanent) names Apr 5, 2011
- Apr 5, 2011 I know far too much about The Land of the Lost Apr 5, 2011
- Apr 4, 2011 Who loves Elmo? Apr 4, 2011
- Apr 4, 2011 Great accomplishments in the trenches Apr 4, 2011
- Apr 3, 2011 Resolution update: March 2011 Apr 3, 2011
- Apr 3, 2011 Cheers Apr 3, 2011
- Apr 3, 2011 My first and only earthquake Apr 3, 2011
- Apr 2, 2011 New bathroom amenities Apr 2, 2011
- Apr 2, 2011 CNN reads the Internet in poorly constructed segments Apr 2, 2011
- Apr 1, 2011 The ability to make fun of oneself is a sign of great intellect. Apr 1, 2011
- Apr 1, 2011 Ice cream dinner Apr 1, 2011
March 2011
- Mar 31, 2011 Swallowing the apology Mar 31, 2011
- Mar 31, 2011 Great moments in academia #3 Mar 31, 2011
- Mar 30, 2011 The changing faces of Matthew Dicks Mar 30, 2011
- Mar 30, 2011 Hug a teacher. Or at least send a note of thanks. Mar 30, 2011
- Mar 30, 2011 Lemmings unwillingly launched to the sea Mar 30, 2011
- Mar 29, 2011 Know thyself, or just read what festival organizers have to say about you instead Mar 29, 2011
- Mar 29, 2011 One of those annoying “My daughter is perfection” posts. But the video is damn cute. Mar 29, 2011
- Mar 29, 2011 Movies that are better than the book: Part 2 Mar 29, 2011
- Mar 28, 2011 Waking the dead with a Datsun B-210 Mar 28, 2011
- Mar 28, 2011 Movies that are better than the book Mar 28, 2011
- Mar 27, 2011 Ousted zebra Mar 27, 2011
- Mar 27, 2011 One-time Ronald McDonald Children’s Charities volunteer imposter Mar 27, 2011
- Mar 27, 2011 A perfect indicator of how you spent your childhood Mar 27, 2011
- Mar 26, 2011 Throw that atheist down the stairs Mar 26, 2011
- Mar 26, 2011 The latest Mar 26, 2011
- Mar 25, 2011 We never got to the war part of the Civil War Mar 25, 2011
- Mar 24, 2011 The dead writing about the dead Mar 24, 2011
- Mar 24, 2011 I’m not a Past Commander, but I’ve got some pin-worthy material of my own Mar 24, 2011
- Mar 23, 2011 Post traumatic growth: Making bad guys more lovable and appreciated Mar 23, 2011
- Mar 23, 2011 How to properly eat a Cadbury Crème Egg Mar 23, 2011
- Mar 22, 2011 Our little devil Mar 22, 2011
- Mar 22, 2011 But can I sing the N-word? Mar 22, 2011
- Mar 21, 2011 All intents and purposes. And intensive purposes. Mar 21, 2011
- Mar 21, 2011 I get irradiated by my wife every night. Mar 21, 2011
- Mar 20, 2011 MATTHEW DICKS' RULES OF ALL DRINKING STORIES Mar 20, 2011
- Mar 20, 2011 Cancellation celebration Mar 20, 2011
- Mar 20, 2011 Toddler manipulation Mar 20, 2011
- Mar 19, 2011 What is my girl thinking? Mar 19, 2011
- Mar 19, 2011 The French reverse course after 25 years. Proof that “Better late than never” is not always true. Mar 19, 2011
- Mar 19, 2011 Disabling a natural phenomenon 15,000 years in the making Mar 19, 2011
- Mar 18, 2011 Only Ann Coulter could make Bill O’Reilly sound incredibly reasonable Mar 18, 2011
- Mar 18, 2011 Should the words said by a character in a work of fiction be attributed to the author? Mar 18, 2011
- Mar 18, 2011 Deserving of death Mar 18, 2011
- Mar 17, 2011 Daddy and a writer in that order Mar 17, 2011
- Mar 17, 2011 This parenting stuff is easy Mar 17, 2011
- Mar 16, 2011 Undies in the mail Mar 16, 2011
- Mar 16, 2011 Exclamation points say so much about a person Mar 16, 2011
- Mar 15, 2011 Broken baby Mar 15, 2011
- Mar 15, 2011 My wife will just about anything to expand my daughter’s palate Mar 15, 2011
- Mar 15, 2011 Her first haircut will be a doozy Mar 15, 2011
- Mar 14, 2011 Gucci what? Mar 14, 2011
- Mar 14, 2011 Should decisions made twenty years ago impact employment today? I’m undecided. Mar 14, 2011
- Mar 13, 2011 Anti-dragon sentiment has dissipated considerably Mar 13, 2011
- Mar 12, 2011 Our mathematical genius Mar 12, 2011
- Mar 12, 2011 How far does your field of expertise actually stretch? Mar 12, 2011
- Mar 12, 2011 Always great or recently great? Mar 12, 2011
- Mar 11, 2011 Creative and frugal Mar 11, 2011
- Mar 11, 2011 The “I told you so” calendar Mar 11, 2011
- Mar 10, 2011 Quoted on Twitter, which is only slightly less prestigious than Bartlett’s Book of Familiar Quotations Mar 10, 2011
- Mar 10, 2011 Red Dawn Moments Mar 10, 2011
- Mar 9, 2011 Love this photo Mar 9, 2011
- Mar 9, 2011 A contest! With prizes! Mar 9, 2011
- Mar 9, 2011 The Hills Have Eyes FOR YOU. Mar 9, 2011
- Mar 8, 2011 Must avoid a takeover Mar 8, 2011
- Mar 8, 2011 Proverb 1.1 Mar 8, 2011
- Mar 8, 2011 Book news, including MEMOIRS OF AN IMAGINARY FRIEND Mar 8, 2011
- Mar 7, 2011 Back-to-back books Mar 7, 2011
- Mar 7, 2011 I get much, much better with age Mar 7, 2011
- Mar 6, 2011 I can’t speak Spanish even though I opted for Spanish Mar 6, 2011
- Mar 6, 2011 Be little again: The best prayer Mar 6, 2011
- Mar 5, 2011 It wasn’t as good as I remembered Mar 5, 2011
- Mar 5, 2011 The Legend of Billie Jean: Fingers crossed it’s as good as I remember. Mar 5, 2011
- Mar 5, 2011 Proverb 1.2 Mar 5, 2011
- Mar 5, 2011 Designed to ruin my day Mar 5, 2011
- Mar 5, 2011 Mugging it up Mar 5, 2011
- Mar 4, 2011 Not a fan of dragons Mar 4, 2011
- Mar 4, 2011 I found my twin brother Mar 4, 2011
- Mar 3, 2011 Growing meat Mar 3, 2011
- Mar 3, 2011 From the book of “No duh” Mar 3, 2011
- Mar 3, 2011 Three unprecedented requests Mar 3, 2011
- Mar 2, 2011 She’s not happy. Mar 2, 2011
- Mar 2, 2011 Bunking and “Right now!” Ever heard of them before? Mar 2, 2011
- Mar 2, 2011 Congratulations, sis! Mar 2, 2011
- Mar 1, 2011 Naked life coaching? Mar 1, 2011
- Mar 1, 2011 At last Mar 1, 2011
- Mar 1, 2011 Poetry collection continued Mar 1, 2011
- Mar 1, 2011 Zelda fangirl Mar 1, 2011
February 2011
- Feb 28, 2011 Freeze Feb 28, 2011
- Feb 28, 2011 Which honk is the right honk? Feb 28, 2011
- Feb 28, 2011 My stock tip of the day Feb 28, 2011
- Feb 27, 2011 A literary reference fifteen years in the making Feb 27, 2011
- Feb 27, 2011 Sexist pig ladies Feb 27, 2011
- Feb 27, 2011 My future poetry collection begins here Feb 27, 2011
- Feb 26, 2011 In-law visitation Feb 26, 2011
- Feb 26, 2011 Temper your parental and marital advice based upon the bell curve Feb 26, 2011
- Feb 26, 2011 Imperfect beauty Feb 26, 2011
- Feb 25, 2011 Talk to your kids Feb 25, 2011
- Feb 25, 2011 I was naked onstage Feb 25, 2011
- Feb 24, 2011 Nothing like an ominous hammer cock Feb 24, 2011
- Feb 24, 2011 Dating in Stop & Shop Feb 24, 2011
- Feb 23, 2011 US Weekly a mystery to me Feb 23, 2011
- Feb 23, 2011 I can’t die at my desk unnoticed. Oh well. Feb 23, 2011
- Feb 22, 2011 When your country is one thousand years old, things can get quite complicated Feb 22, 2011
- Feb 22, 2011 Techno-toddler Feb 22, 2011
- Feb 22, 2011 This ain’t my childhood library Feb 22, 2011
- Feb 21, 2011 My house is a veritable palace Feb 21, 2011
- Feb 21, 2011 Every boy loves Nessie Feb 21, 2011
- Feb 20, 2011 I want this guy on my team Feb 20, 2011
- Feb 20, 2011 Obama and Dicks simpatico Feb 20, 2011
- Feb 20, 2011 ESPN was listening Feb 20, 2011
- Feb 20, 2011 Finally. A solution. Feb 20, 2011
- Feb 19, 2011 Should boys and girls be allowed to compete against one another in high school wrestling? Of course. Not. Maybe. I don’t know. Feb 19, 2011
- Feb 19, 2011 ESPN fail: A simple design decision gone awry Feb 19, 2011
- Feb 19, 2011 Brilliant restroom redesign Feb 19, 2011
- Feb 18, 2011 The survivors are more menacing than the zombies Feb 18, 2011
- Feb 18, 2011 THIS COULD HAPPEN, TOM. Feb 18, 2011
- Feb 17, 2011 I wish I had thought of this first Feb 17, 2011
- Feb 17, 2011 Best headline ever Feb 17, 2011
- Feb 16, 2011 Oh yes. Feb 16, 2011
- Feb 16, 2011 Final birthday present Feb 16, 2011
- Feb 16, 2011 An ineffectual glare and an aimless finger point Feb 16, 2011
- Feb 15, 2011 Birthdays without Mom are not quite the same anymore Feb 15, 2011
- Feb 15, 2011 Typical fortieth birthday gifts? Feb 15, 2011
- Feb 15, 2011 An education to most certainly brag about Feb 15, 2011
- Feb 14, 2011 Sexy rumpus. I like that. Feb 14, 2011
- Feb 14, 2011 Not cool. I think. Actually, maybe it’s very cool. Feb 14, 2011
- Feb 14, 2011 Ten people who hate Valentines Day and should be avoided at all costs Feb 14, 2011
- Feb 13, 2011 Three decisions that simplified my life Feb 13, 2011
- Feb 13, 2011 Game show cruelty Feb 13, 2011
- Feb 13, 2011 Sometimes the obvious should be obvious Feb 13, 2011
- Feb 12, 2011 I punched a guy in the gut. Maybe a little lower than the gut. Feb 12, 2011
- Feb 12, 2011 Not every honor is an honor Feb 12, 2011
- Feb 11, 2011 Crazy knows what crazy does Feb 11, 2011
- Feb 11, 2011 Sometimes you’re wrong, and sometimes you’re REALLY, REALLY, REALLY WRONG. Feb 11, 2011
- Feb 10, 2011 Your attempt at deflection simply reiterates your original ignorance, Mrs. Palin. Feb 10, 2011
- Feb 10, 2011 Serious customers Feb 10, 2011
- Feb 9, 2011 Improving Ice Road Truckers Feb 9, 2011
- Feb 9, 2011 Slash gets picky at the wrong time Feb 9, 2011
- Feb 8, 2011 Goodbye Apple? Feb 8, 2011
- Feb 8, 2011 I like Homer’s version better Feb 8, 2011
- Feb 8, 2011 I try not to say "Bless you." My daughter will probably think I'm a lunatic. Feb 8, 2011
- Feb 7, 2011 A few random quandaries Feb 7, 2011
- Feb 7, 2011 King Phillip was the best we could do? Feb 7, 2011
- Feb 6, 2011 So many misconceptions Feb 6, 2011
- Feb 6, 2011 I’m a grown man and I still want to peek into the girl’s locker room. But not for the reasons you might be imagining. Feb 6, 2011
- Feb 5, 2011 Iowa goes the way of the bigots Feb 5, 2011
- Feb 5, 2011 It's not that hard and I am not a liar (nor am I suffering from cognitive dissonance) Feb 5, 2011
- Feb 5, 2011 Not a phone but very cute Feb 5, 2011
- Feb 4, 2011 I was suspended for inciting riot upon myself, but it turns out that this was not a legal suspension Feb 4, 2011
- Feb 4, 2011 As a result of this research, I intend to spend hour upon hour playing video games with my daughter Feb 4, 2011
- Feb 3, 2011 I’m jealous. Feb 3, 2011
- Feb 3, 2011 More information about road kill than you will ever want or need Feb 3, 2011
- Feb 3, 2011 Television wasteland Feb 3, 2011
- Feb 2, 2011 A possible Valentine’s Day treat Feb 2, 2011
- Feb 2, 2011 The headline should read: 99-year old Japanese poet finally gets off her ass Feb 2, 2011
- Feb 1, 2011 Resolution update: January 2011 Feb 1, 2011
- Feb 1, 2011 Top Gun and Homer Simpson? What’s next? Feb 1, 2011
- Feb 1, 2011 Just because women choose not to contribute to the assemblage of all human knowledge does not make the medium any less egalitarian Feb 1, 2011
- Feb 1, 2011 Inexplicable and clearly disturbed palate runs in the family Feb 1, 2011
January 2011
- Jan 31, 2011 Why didn’t someone show me before I went to college? Jan 31, 2011
- Jan 31, 2011 You say yes. I say no. But do I really mean no? Jan 31, 2011
- Jan 30, 2011 No silly exercises from this life coach Jan 30, 2011
- Jan 30, 2011 The enemy within Jan 30, 2011
- Jan 30, 2011 Overslept Jan 30, 2011
- Jan 29, 2011 It does not stand for quintessential Jan 29, 2011
- Jan 29, 2011 I want my $25,000 back, damn it. Jan 29, 2011
- Jan 28, 2011 Intelligentsia Jan 28, 2011
- Jan 28, 2011 A joyous response to the misery of others Jan 28, 2011
- Jan 27, 2011 Bicycle? Jan 27, 2011
- Jan 27, 2011 I am at a loss for words. I simply cannot believe what I have just seen. Jan 27, 2011
- Jan 27, 2011 You hurt my feelings. I’m taking my toys and going home. Jan 27, 2011
- Jan 26, 2011 Big Love is too much love Jan 26, 2011
- Jan 26, 2011 I am the father of a two-year old. Jan 26, 2011
- Jan 26, 2011 Maybe not a rapist, but the guy can’t even get a date Jan 26, 2011
- Jan 25, 2011 Assigned seating sucks Jan 25, 2011
- Jan 25, 2011 I don’t know guys this cool Jan 25, 2011
- Jan 24, 2011 Huh? Jan 24, 2011
- Jan 24, 2011 My daughter may be in communication with aliens Jan 24, 2011
- Jan 23, 2011 Sometimes she’s a little too witty Jan 23, 2011
- Jan 23, 2011 The best kind of consolation Jan 23, 2011
- Jan 22, 2011 Snow day Jan 22, 2011
- Jan 22, 2011 Not sure how to feel about this. Jan 22, 2011
- Jan 21, 2011 There is a big difference between girl-on-girl and elephant-on-girl Jan 21, 2011
- Jan 21, 2011 Worst attempt to legitimize an already bizarre business model Jan 21, 2011
- Jan 20, 2011 The mindless hum of mindless agreement Jan 20, 2011
- Jan 20, 2011 Do she not speak good on purpose? Jan 20, 2011
- Jan 20, 2011 Not booing. Just cheering. Jan 20, 2011
- Jan 19, 2011 He needs more room in the crotch Jan 19, 2011
- Jan 19, 2011 Social stupidity cannot be covered up by the violin Jan 19, 2011
- Jan 18, 2011 Worst day Jan 18, 2011
- Jan 18, 2011 5 bits of podcasting advice from a professional podcast listener Jan 18, 2011
- Jan 18, 2011 Mismatched but perfect Jan 18, 2011
- Jan 17, 2011 Mammoths, octopi and a whole bunch of spoons Jan 17, 2011
- Jan 17, 2011 6 reasons for a lack of motivation Jan 17, 2011
- Jan 17, 2011 How Swedish Fish got their name Jan 17, 2011
- Jan 16, 2011 We might need to back off the praise a bit Jan 16, 2011
- Jan 16, 2011 I cannot do business with someone who exhibits such questionable decision making Jan 16, 2011
- Jan 15, 2011 Teddy bear killers Jan 15, 2011
- Jan 15, 2011 The original Venn diagram is the best Venn diagram Jan 15, 2011
- Jan 14, 2011 A demanding girl Jan 14, 2011
- Jan 14, 2011 A day late, a couple of marbles short Jan 14, 2011
- Jan 13, 2011 A call to arms Jan 13, 2011
- Jan 13, 2011 Misunderstood palate Jan 13, 2011
- Jan 12, 2011 Only idiots on the roads Jan 12, 2011
- Jan 12, 2011 Arizona shooting recap Jan 12, 2011
- Jan 12, 2011 Old school verbiage in new school scenarios Jan 12, 2011
- Jan 11, 2011 Susan Patricia McKenna: 1950-2007 Jan 11, 2011
- Jan 11, 2011 One definition too many Jan 11, 2011
- Jan 11, 2011 How much does Clara love Daddy? Jan 11, 2011
- Jan 11, 2011 She reappeared with this. Jan 11, 2011
- Jan 10, 2011 Jumper-talker-downer for hire Jan 10, 2011
- Jan 10, 2011 Fear not the Christmas tree, for your methods of indoctrination are far more powerful than tinsel and colored lights. Jan 10, 2011
- Jan 9, 2011 iCarly trumps Robert Frost and Val Kilmer Jan 9, 2011
- Jan 9, 2011 A land of ice cream and death Jan 9, 2011
- Jan 8, 2011 So stupid it wouldn’t make for bad fiction Jan 8, 2011
- Jan 8, 2011 Unhappy Jan 8, 2011
- Jan 8, 2011 Initial assessment of Glee Jan 8, 2011
- Jan 7, 2011 The people who didn’t kill dogs are good, too. Jan 7, 2011
- Jan 7, 2011 Stupidity abounds in the NFL Jan 7, 2011
- Jan 7, 2011 Home for the day Jan 7, 2011
- Jan 6, 2011 I have apparently married a rock star. Jan 6, 2011
- Jan 6, 2011 Too much is worse than too little Jan 6, 2011
- Jan 5, 2011 More Oliver oddities Jan 5, 2011
- Jan 5, 2011 A bunch wasn’t enough? Jan 5, 2011
- Jan 5, 2011 Vampire bats and me Jan 5, 2011
- Jan 4, 2011 Snob magazine Jan 4, 2011
- Jan 4, 2011 Post-holiday detritus Jan 4, 2011
- Jan 3, 2011 Boddah and Budo Jan 3, 2011
- Jan 3, 2011 She’s got rhythm but decidedly less pitch Jan 3, 2011
- Jan 2, 2011 Recent quotes, as selected by a reader Jan 2, 2011
- Jan 2, 2011 Probably needed a second opinion Jan 2, 2011
- Jan 1, 2011 New Year’s Resolutions: 2011 Jan 1, 2011
December 2010
- Dec 31, 2010 Resolution update: 2010 in review Dec 31, 2010
- Dec 31, 2010 Three very different films Dec 31, 2010
- Dec 30, 2010 Yes, I’ve posted a cat video. Don’t judge me. Dec 30, 2010
- Dec 30, 2010 Creativity runs in the family Dec 30, 2010
- Dec 29, 2010 Good information. Bad writing. Dec 29, 2010
- Dec 29, 2010 True friends hurt one another whenever possible Dec 29, 2010
- Dec 28, 2010 Avoid ambiguity in the demise of a character Dec 28, 2010
- Dec 28, 2010 Need a grocery store? We have plenty. Dec 28, 2010
- Dec 28, 2010 The price of wealth Dec 28, 2010
- Dec 27, 2010 Topless, frigid and amusing Dec 27, 2010
- Dec 27, 2010 I’m so jealous Dec 27, 2010
- Dec 26, 2010 I did not grow up with children’s books Dec 26, 2010
- Dec 26, 2010 My 2010 Christmas haul Dec 26, 2010
- Dec 26, 2010 Jewish infiltration at the North Pole, perhaps? Dec 26, 2010
- Dec 26, 2010 How to turn a toy gun into an appropriate gift Dec 26, 2010
- Dec 25, 2010 Best Christmas gift of the day Dec 25, 2010
- Dec 24, 2010 I constantly dream about the apocalypse. Is this normal? Dec 24, 2010
- Dec 23, 2010 The essence of me, as distilled by my wife and my high school sweetheart Dec 23, 2010
- Dec 23, 2010 What would Emperor Hirohito think? Dec 23, 2010
- Dec 22, 2010 What will your last words be? Are you prepared? Dec 22, 2010
- Dec 22, 2010 No accident Dec 22, 2010
- Dec 21, 2010 Brilliant or brat? Dec 21, 2010
- Dec 21, 2010 First time I was paid to write Dec 21, 2010
- Dec 21, 2010 Denial is a powerful tool Dec 21, 2010
- Dec 19, 2010 Equality not always advisable Dec 19, 2010
- Dec 19, 2010 Kitty cat love Dec 19, 2010
- Dec 18, 2010 My books read like Clifford the Big Red Dog. At least at first. Dec 18, 2010
- Dec 18, 2010 A little weird or immeasurably cool? Dec 18, 2010
- Dec 17, 2010 WOW. Dec 17, 2010
- Dec 17, 2010 I probably like this a lot more than I should Dec 17, 2010
- Dec 17, 2010 Facebook Fail Dec 17, 2010
- Dec 16, 2010 A couple of winners Dec 16, 2010
- Dec 16, 2010 Best worst insult Dec 16, 2010
- Dec 15, 2010 Beauty squared Dec 15, 2010
- Dec 15, 2010 Should I be a little nicer in 2011? Dec 15, 2010
- Dec 14, 2010 My treatise on tipping Dec 14, 2010
- Dec 13, 2010 My kingdom for an orange Dec 13, 2010
- Dec 13, 2010 The deception of The Nutcracker Dec 13, 2010
- Dec 12, 2010 More classless New York Jets behavior Dec 12, 2010
- Dec 12, 2010 Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me: Near perfection, but not quite Dec 12, 2010
- Dec 12, 2010 Jets handle rejection like a spurned teenage snob Dec 12, 2010
- Dec 11, 2010 If my nightmares weren’t already consumed by armed robbers and gunshots to the head, this would most assuredly be my nightly psychological torment Dec 11, 2010
- Dec 11, 2010 Bare-breasted behemoths and buxom babes not needed Dec 11, 2010
- Dec 10, 2010 Is the Chamberlen family one of the greatest collections of scoundrels to ever walk the face of the Earth? Dec 10, 2010
- Dec 9, 2010 Topless would have been better Dec 9, 2010
- Dec 9, 2010 Headstones and high-fives Dec 9, 2010
- Dec 8, 2010 The thing I do best Dec 8, 2010
- Dec 7, 2010 It's the little things that make me feel the most stupid Dec 7, 2010
- Dec 6, 2010 Potential dead friends Dec 6, 2010
- Dec 5, 2010 Cheat cheat never beat. Except by accident. Dec 5, 2010
- Dec 4, 2010 Hardest decisions are usually the best decisions Dec 4, 2010
- Dec 3, 2010 High expectations are not always good Dec 3, 2010
- Dec 3, 2010 Anatomy of a toddler’s conversation Dec 3, 2010
- Dec 3, 2010 Frazzled moms making a bad name for competent mothers everywhere Dec 3, 2010
- Dec 2, 2010 Bats with bombs Dec 2, 2010
- Dec 2, 2010 The forgotten freedom of adulthood: Stop disappointing the childhood version of yourself and do something ridiculous Dec 2, 2010
- Dec 1, 2010 Resolution update: November 2010 Dec 1, 2010
- Dec 1, 2010 My favorite works of fiction Dec 1, 2010
November 2010
- Nov 30, 2010 He makes a fine, fine point Nov 30, 2010
- Nov 30, 2010 Worst things ever Nov 30, 2010
- Nov 30, 2010 Talk Soup: A solution to my cultural blindness? Nov 30, 2010
- Nov 29, 2010 Royal wedding stupidity Nov 29, 2010
- Nov 29, 2010 Two more allergens to add to my list Nov 29, 2010
- Nov 28, 2010 Slightly disingenuous but outstanding nonetheless Nov 28, 2010
- Nov 28, 2010 How to know your Supreme Court justices Nov 28, 2010
- Nov 28, 2010 Flip-flop throwing and pending nuptials Nov 28, 2010
- Nov 27, 2010 National Geographic photo contest Nov 27, 2010
- Nov 27, 2010 Determiners of intelligence Nov 27, 2010
- Nov 26, 2010 LOUD MUSIC in a library? Nov 26, 2010
- Nov 26, 2010 Casual dining at 7-11 Nov 26, 2010
- Nov 26, 2010 How to win a Thanksgiving Day argument Nov 26, 2010
- Nov 26, 2010 And now some genuine thanks Nov 26, 2010
- Nov 25, 2010 Unable to give thanks on this Thanksgiving Nov 25, 2010
- Nov 24, 2010 You are a stupid person who cannot drive Nov 24, 2010
- Nov 24, 2010 When you are supposed to like it Nov 24, 2010
- Nov 24, 2010 Better than some actual SNL episodes Nov 24, 2010
- Nov 23, 2010 This is disturbing Nov 23, 2010
- Nov 23, 2010 Okay? Nov 23, 2010
- Nov 22, 2010 Definition of insanity is insane Nov 22, 2010
- Nov 22, 2010 Not terribly exciting but full of truthiness nonetheless Nov 22, 2010
- Nov 21, 2010 The tranquility of a cheeseburger Nov 21, 2010
- Nov 20, 2010 Even God can have a bad day Nov 20, 2010
- Nov 20, 2010 I can't wear these shirts. Right? Nov 20, 2010
- Nov 19, 2010 When sex is involved, shouldn’t it always be the lead? Nov 19, 2010
- Nov 19, 2010 Full body whiners Nov 19, 2010
- Nov 19, 2010 Important parental service announcement Nov 19, 2010
- Nov 18, 2010 CPR sex discrimination Nov 18, 2010
- Nov 18, 2010 Catastrophic yawn Nov 18, 2010
- Nov 18, 2010 Sucks to be a cashier Nov 18, 2010
- Nov 17, 2010 Desperately seeking Cheerios Nov 17, 2010
- Nov 17, 2010 A collection of ineffective and legitimately insane and possible criminal teachers Nov 17, 2010
- Nov 16, 2010 Choosing one is impossible. Choosing three is stupid, too. Nov 16, 2010
- Nov 16, 2010 Depressing and monotonous in bed Nov 16, 2010
- Nov 15, 2010 My new favorite photo of my daughter Nov 15, 2010
- Nov 15, 2010 Catastrophe and heartache breeds optimism Nov 15, 2010
- Nov 15, 2010 Aligned with the lunatics Nov 15, 2010
- Nov 14, 2010 Possible black sheep of the family? Nov 14, 2010
- Nov 14, 2010 Clara and Owen Nov 14, 2010
- Nov 14, 2010 Self administered surgery Nov 14, 2010
- Nov 13, 2010 Bologna and catsup sandwiches Nov 13, 2010
- Nov 13, 2010 Dick Van Dyke rescued by porpoises? Nov 13, 2010
- Nov 12, 2010 Large organizations with large problems Nov 12, 2010
- Nov 12, 2010 Spreading the McRib and other good news Nov 12, 2010
- Nov 11, 2010 Lessons from two years of parenting Nov 11, 2010
- Nov 10, 2010 My way is the right way. Nov 10, 2010
- Nov 10, 2010 How do you answer "What do you do for a living?" when you have three jobs? Nov 10, 2010
- Nov 9, 2010 Perverse political pleasure Nov 9, 2010
- Nov 9, 2010 Rhetorical blunder Nov 9, 2010
- Nov 8, 2010 This is insane Nov 8, 2010
- Nov 8, 2010 How did you decide upon your occupation? Nov 8, 2010
- Nov 7, 2010 For the sake of brevity… Nov 7, 2010
- Nov 7, 2010 Pouty Sanchez Nov 7, 2010
- Nov 6, 2010 Defeated by the elderly Nov 6, 2010
- Nov 6, 2010 Can't imagine why I am not universally adored Nov 6, 2010
- Nov 5, 2010 Spiders in a Volkswagen Nov 5, 2010
- Nov 4, 2010 Cartoon babe? Nov 4, 2010
- Nov 4, 2010 Simple and doable Nov 4, 2010
- Nov 4, 2010 I don’t know who Snooky is or if Lady Gaga wore a meat dress, but I’m probably happier than you. Nov 4, 2010
- Nov 3, 2010 Knitting not allowed (because I'm jealous) Nov 3, 2010
- Nov 2, 2010 Best news from our little bundle of joy Nov 2, 2010
- Nov 2, 2010 Inexplicable engineering stupidity Nov 2, 2010
- Nov 2, 2010 The language of pole vaulting Nov 2, 2010
- Nov 1, 2010 Let's start applauding all church organists Nov 1, 2010
- Nov 1, 2010 Hearts in Atlantis: A fine name for an entirely different film Nov 1, 2010
- Nov 1, 2010 It was also pretty awesome. I won’t lie. Nov 1, 2010
October 2010
- Oct 31, 2010 It’s a six hour holiday. NOT A SEASON. Oct 31, 2010
- Oct 31, 2010 Brick House and breasts Oct 31, 2010
- Oct 30, 2010 The original Nordstrom's employee manual contains the only rule that any organization needs to function effectively. Oct 30, 2010
- Oct 29, 2010 Panty raid! Oct 29, 2010
- Oct 29, 2010 Am I Ned, too? Oct 29, 2010
- Oct 28, 2010 Sex in a carefully monitored lab setting Oct 28, 2010
- Oct 28, 2010 I am a giant nerd Oct 28, 2010
- Oct 28, 2010 Testicular cancer talk Oct 28, 2010
- Oct 27, 2010 Bits and bytes from my first days with Elysha Oct 27, 2010
- Oct 27, 2010 Old men quitting on their teams Oct 27, 2010
- Oct 26, 2010 A lot can happen in twelve years… Oct 26, 2010
- Oct 26, 2010 Identity crisis Oct 26, 2010
- Oct 25, 2010 Forever young Oct 25, 2010
- Oct 25, 2010 Shooting little kids in the chest Oct 25, 2010
- Oct 24, 2010 But it’s just Bram Oct 24, 2010
- Oct 24, 2010 5 pieces of advice from my evil stepfather Oct 24, 2010
- Oct 23, 2010 What is Hell? Oct 23, 2010
- Oct 23, 2010 At last! A job tailor-made to my abilities. Oct 23, 2010
- Oct 22, 2010 Pants are not priceless Oct 22, 2010
- Oct 21, 2010 Do vegans force their pets and children to be vegans, too? Oct 21, 2010
- Oct 21, 2010 You’re not welcome Oct 21, 2010
- Oct 20, 2010 I got hit by a car and forgot about it, and my memory loss had nothing to do with my head injury Oct 20, 2010
- Oct 20, 2010 Programmed to despise shopping Oct 20, 2010
- Oct 19, 2010 Sit and watch Daddy poop! Oct 19, 2010
- Oct 19, 2010 Talking to the wrong guy, buddy Oct 19, 2010
- Oct 19, 2010 Lacking social sensitivity and stress Oct 19, 2010
- Oct 18, 2010 Preferred parking for managers and administrators is really just jackass parking. Oct 18, 2010
- Oct 18, 2010 Where is your engagement ring? Oct 18, 2010
- Oct 17, 2010 In case you didn’t see this… Oct 17, 2010
- Oct 17, 2010 Best gift ever Oct 17, 2010
- Oct 17, 2010 I'm afraid that I will someday be an unwanted wedding guest Oct 17, 2010
- Oct 16, 2010 More on shoe removal Oct 16, 2010
- Oct 16, 2010 A tale of two weddings Oct 16, 2010
- Oct 15, 2010 Look under the back panties Oct 15, 2010
- Oct 15, 2010 She is much too thin Oct 15, 2010
- Oct 14, 2010 The phone sucks. Voice mail is slightly more palatable, and now, it's easily accessible. Oct 14, 2010
- Oct 14, 2010 No more neckties Oct 14, 2010
- Oct 13, 2010 It’s your house and your rules, but I don’t have to like them. Oct 13, 2010
- Oct 12, 2010 Confessions of an Elmo addict Oct 12, 2010
- Oct 12, 2010 A rock and a hard place Oct 12, 2010
- Oct 11, 2010 Words of marital wisdom Oct 11, 2010
- Oct 10, 2010 What’s in your belly? Oct 10, 2010
- Oct 10, 2010 Bee and bride Oct 10, 2010
- Oct 10, 2010 Small comforts Oct 10, 2010
- Oct 9, 2010 Resolution update: September 2010 Oct 9, 2010
- Oct 9, 2010 Speeding kills… road signs. Oct 9, 2010
- Oct 9, 2010 Revenge is sweet, as long as it doesn’t harm Clara Oct 9, 2010
- Oct 8, 2010 Complicated parking Oct 8, 2010
- Oct 8, 2010 I tend to be a nonconformist, but when it came to high school hazing, a little conformity might've been a good idea. Oct 8, 2010
- Oct 7, 2010 A more innocent time Oct 7, 2010
- Oct 7, 2010 My thought for the day Oct 7, 2010
- Oct 7, 2010 The Internet is not always necessary Oct 7, 2010
- Oct 6, 2010 Art imitates life Oct 6, 2010
- Oct 6, 2010 An end of the world “I told you so” Oct 6, 2010
- Oct 6, 2010 Killing pigeons and swimming in sync are both dumb Oct 6, 2010
- Oct 5, 2010 Unacceptable, even in a restroom Oct 5, 2010
- Oct 5, 2010 Graduation blues Oct 5, 2010
- Oct 5, 2010 If you have to announce it to the world… Oct 5, 2010
- Oct 4, 2010 Men would never put up with this Tupperware party nonsense Oct 4, 2010
- Oct 4, 2010 The reverse crank call Oct 4, 2010
- Oct 3, 2010 Connecticut automotive eccentricities Oct 3, 2010
- Oct 3, 2010 Is good food enough? Oct 3, 2010
- Oct 2, 2010 Did we need to see the veins? Oct 2, 2010
- Oct 2, 2010 You name the state Oct 2, 2010
- Oct 2, 2010 Bad wedding advice from another white, middle aged advice columnist Oct 2, 2010
- Oct 1, 2010 Germans continue to win despite their defeat Oct 1, 2010
September 2010
- Sep 30, 2010 This is not semantics Sep 30, 2010
- Sep 30, 2010 Forgotten past Sep 30, 2010
- Sep 30, 2010 Happy Camper Sep 30, 2010
- Sep 29, 2010 The bride is pretty Sep 29, 2010
- Sep 29, 2010 Crazy Town Sep 29, 2010
- Sep 28, 2010 Peanut allergy is peanuts by comparison Sep 28, 2010
- Sep 28, 2010 Most famous Newington resident? Sep 28, 2010
- Sep 28, 2010 Rewriting Melville Sep 28, 2010
- Sep 27, 2010 The truth will set the wolves on you Sep 27, 2010
- Sep 27, 2010 Yes, I am left handed. As a result, I am more likely to be President or a murderer. Or both. Sep 27, 2010
- Sep 26, 2010 Huh? Sep 26, 2010
- Sep 26, 2010 The Google is God Sep 26, 2010
- Sep 25, 2010 The good, the bad and the people who should shut up Sep 25, 2010
- Sep 25, 2010 Danger. Old people crossing. Sep 25, 2010
- Sep 25, 2010 Canine critic Sep 25, 2010
- Sep 25, 2010 Bring it on Sep 25, 2010
- Sep 24, 2010 Worst movie dialogue ever Sep 24, 2010
- Sep 22, 2010 No murder in my heart Sep 22, 2010
- Sep 22, 2010 No middle ground Sep 22, 2010
- Sep 21, 2010 Can you have too much choice? Sep 21, 2010
- Sep 21, 2010 My name affords exponentially more options Sep 21, 2010
- Sep 20, 2010 Too clever for its own good Sep 20, 2010
- Sep 20, 2010 Assigning personal belief at birth Sep 20, 2010
- Sep 20, 2010 Raise your hand if you think that lush eyelashes have anything to do with beauty. Sep 20, 2010
- Sep 19, 2010 Save the planet. Sit your ass down. Sep 19, 2010
- Sep 19, 2010 Meanest comments of the year Sep 19, 2010
- Sep 19, 2010 House tours Sep 19, 2010
- Sep 18, 2010 Is there a reason to cater to adults? Sep 18, 2010
- Sep 18, 2010 Read that book at your own risk Sep 18, 2010
- Sep 17, 2010 Hiding from me Sep 17, 2010
- Sep 17, 2010 I learned so much more than a foreign language Sep 17, 2010
- Sep 16, 2010 Pets. Part 1. Sep 16, 2010
- Sep 16, 2010 Strangest question this year Sep 16, 2010
- Sep 16, 2010 Disoriented but on time Sep 16, 2010
- Sep 15, 2010 Ladies. Please. My daughter’s future is at stake. Sep 15, 2010
- Sep 15, 2010 Roses are red. Not green. Sep 15, 2010
- Sep 14, 2010 Are wives really this rotten? Sep 14, 2010
- Sep 14, 2010 Unnecessary pages be gone! Sep 14, 2010
- Sep 13, 2010 Not nice. And not Jewish. Sep 13, 2010
- Sep 13, 2010 My wife kissed a strange man in exchange for fruit and alcohol Sep 13, 2010
- Sep 13, 2010 A little baby becomes a little kid Sep 13, 2010
- Sep 12, 2010 Embodiment of their teacher Sep 12, 2010
- Sep 12, 2010 Go home. Sep 12, 2010
- Sep 11, 2010 Bested by Best Western Sep 11, 2010
- Sep 11, 2010 A teacher's recollections of 9/11 Sep 11, 2010
- Sep 11, 2010 Independence trumps any semblance of heat Sep 11, 2010
- Sep 10, 2010 Not funny Sep 10, 2010
- Sep 10, 2010 Dental nerd Sep 10, 2010
- Sep 10, 2010 How old is considered fully cooked? Sep 10, 2010
- Sep 9, 2010 Peeing into your golf club is not a solution to not a problem. Sep 9, 2010
- Sep 8, 2010 Biological explanation Sep 8, 2010
- Sep 8, 2010 Fresh veggies? Bah! Sep 8, 2010
- Sep 7, 2010 Deathbed regrets Sep 7, 2010
- Sep 7, 2010 She must think she’s married an idiot Sep 7, 2010
- Sep 7, 2010 Art defined by dollars Sep 7, 2010
- Sep 6, 2010 Big head finally explained Sep 6, 2010
- Sep 5, 2010 My two most common restaurant complaints Sep 5, 2010
- Sep 5, 2010 One of the only reasons to like the fashion industry Sep 5, 2010
- Sep 5, 2010 The encore is stupid. Sep 5, 2010
- Sep 4, 2010 New words in the OED Sep 4, 2010
- Sep 3, 2010 Parental fears come to life Sep 3, 2010
- Sep 3, 2010 Lifehack of the decade Sep 3, 2010
- Sep 2, 2010 Resolution update: August 2010 Sep 2, 2010
- Sep 2, 2010 The best they could do? Sep 2, 2010
- Sep 2, 2010 No such thing as a free breakfast Sep 2, 2010
- Sep 1, 2010 Marital combat or martial combat? Sep 1, 2010
- Sep 1, 2010 Truth Sep 1, 2010
- Sep 1, 2010 Warm and wet but not too long Sep 1, 2010
August 2010
- Aug 31, 2010 The honest author bio Aug 31, 2010
- Aug 31, 2010 Author bio finalized Aug 31, 2010
- Aug 31, 2010 Happy and dissatisfied Aug 31, 2010
- Aug 30, 2010 Golden Rule, Golden Shmool Aug 30, 2010
- Aug 30, 2010 Can I survive on even less sleep? Aug 30, 2010
- Aug 30, 2010 Merriam Webster’s Top 10 Commonly Confused Words Aug 30, 2010
- Aug 29, 2010 Dead people’s jerseys Aug 29, 2010
- Aug 28, 2010 "Be an unbeatable person and avenge my death.” Aug 28, 2010
- Aug 28, 2010 Give kids a reason to write Aug 28, 2010
- Aug 27, 2010 CAPS LOCK Aug 27, 2010
- Aug 27, 2010 No place like home Aug 27, 2010
- Aug 26, 2010 Skookum! Aug 26, 2010
- Aug 26, 2010 Did they use straws to empty the pools? Aug 26, 2010
- Aug 26, 2010 Is it time for product placement in fiction? Aug 26, 2010
- Aug 25, 2010 Knock! Knock! Aug 25, 2010
- Aug 25, 2010 The backhanded compliment bio Aug 25, 2010
- Aug 24, 2010 Contest runner-up #2 Aug 24, 2010
- Aug 23, 2010 Name your kid after me or don’t. No middle ground. Aug 23, 2010
- Aug 23, 2010 Susan Stamberg confirms that I’m not old man. Aug 23, 2010
- Aug 23, 2010 The Page 69 Test Aug 23, 2010
- Aug 22, 2010 It seems like pandering, but I swear it’s not. She’s not angry at me nor have I done anything stupid as of late. Aug 22, 2010
- Aug 21, 2010 Based upon King’s estimation, I’m a huge success! Aug 21, 2010
- Aug 21, 2010 Nonconforming, subversive wife Aug 21, 2010
- Aug 20, 2010 Realities of a book tour and some recommended reads Aug 20, 2010
- Aug 20, 2010 Contest runner-up #1 Aug 20, 2010
- Aug 19, 2010 Not right. Not cool. Aug 19, 2010
- Aug 19, 2010 When imaginary friends become real Aug 19, 2010
- Aug 18, 2010 And the winner is… Aug 18, 2010
- Aug 18, 2010 Love ‘em as a Patriot, but as an analyst… Aug 18, 2010
- Aug 18, 2010 New business plan for English majors everywhere (myself included) Aug 18, 2010
- Aug 17, 2010 Foolish guarantee Aug 17, 2010
- Aug 17, 2010 Best letter Aug 17, 2010
- Aug 17, 2010 Matty’s Top 10 wedding tips Aug 17, 2010
- Aug 16, 2010 TheKnot.com threatening to take over the world Aug 16, 2010
- Aug 16, 2010 UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO update Aug 16, 2010
- Aug 15, 2010 My sources Aug 15, 2010
- Aug 15, 2010 My theory on IQ Aug 15, 2010
- Aug 14, 2010 Must watch: Words Aug 14, 2010
- Aug 14, 2010 Quarterbacks are jerks Aug 14, 2010
- Aug 13, 2010 New York Times Book Review! Aug 13, 2010
- Aug 13, 2010 Squirm Aug 13, 2010
- Aug 13, 2010 I don’t like the French Aug 13, 2010
- Aug 12, 2010 Disturbing my sleep on purpose Aug 12, 2010
- Aug 12, 2010 Casting is an art Aug 12, 2010
- Aug 12, 2010 Really bad band names Aug 12, 2010
- Aug 12, 2010 It's difficult, if not impossible, to modulate your vocabulary to accommodate the unknown needs of your audience. Aug 12, 2010
- Aug 11, 2010 Unexpected links Aug 11, 2010
- Aug 11, 2010 Easy peezy lemon squeezy Aug 11, 2010
- Aug 11, 2010 Delete before you die Aug 11, 2010
- Aug 11, 2010 Unhappy parents Aug 11, 2010
- Aug 10, 2010 Slow on the uptake Aug 10, 2010
- Aug 10, 2010 Justin Bieber and Albert Einstein in one place Aug 10, 2010
- Aug 9, 2010 Killer Aug 9, 2010
- Aug 9, 2010 I was a griefer. I'm so proud of it. Aug 9, 2010
- Aug 9, 2010 An idiot with a difficult name Aug 9, 2010
- Aug 8, 2010 No more smiles around the table Aug 8, 2010
- Aug 8, 2010 Cupcakes and college professors Aug 8, 2010
- Aug 7, 2010 No girls allowed Aug 7, 2010
- Aug 7, 2010 Maniac behind the wheel Aug 7, 2010
- Aug 6, 2010 Early musical predictor Aug 6, 2010
- Aug 6, 2010 My personal life expectancy Aug 6, 2010
- Aug 6, 2010 Huh? Aug 6, 2010
- Aug 5, 2010 Jerry can copy but not the rest of us? Aug 5, 2010
- Aug 5, 2010 Maybe Toughskins and parachute pants will make a comeback, too Aug 5, 2010
- Aug 4, 2010 Question about womanly matters Aug 4, 2010
- Aug 4, 2010 Daily Candy and The Wall Street Journal! Aug 4, 2010
- Aug 4, 2010 UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO book tour begins! Aug 4, 2010
- Aug 4, 2010 Situation Aug 4, 2010
- Aug 3, 2010 My favorite gift Aug 3, 2010
- Aug 3, 2010 Infecting the Internet Aug 3, 2010
- Aug 2, 2010 A little consistency, please? Aug 2, 2010
- Aug 2, 2010 Thanks a lot, Glenn… Aug 2, 2010
- Aug 2, 2010 One of the benefits of having children Aug 2, 2010
- Aug 1, 2010 Resolution update: July 2010 Aug 1, 2010
- Aug 1, 2010 Contest update Aug 1, 2010
- Aug 1, 2010 Someone stole my college Aug 1, 2010
July 2010
- Jul 31, 2010 Pleasure in another person’s pain Jul 31, 2010
- Jul 31, 2010 Short-sightedness Jul 31, 2010
- Jul 30, 2010 You have some explaining to do, John Boy. Jul 30, 2010
- Jul 30, 2010 The precipice of publication Jul 30, 2010
- Jul 30, 2010 Believers always welcome Jul 30, 2010
- Jul 29, 2010 Only in corporate America Jul 29, 2010
- Jul 29, 2010 As a writer, I often have no idea what I'm doing Jul 29, 2010
- Jul 29, 2010 Stupid tee shirt made stupider Jul 29, 2010
- Jul 28, 2010 I was right! (insert self-congratulatory jig) Jul 28, 2010
- Jul 28, 2010 The first table is merely a suggestion. Jul 28, 2010
- Jul 28, 2010 Useless word Jul 28, 2010
- Jul 28, 2010 Career advice Jul 28, 2010
- Jul 27, 2010 Top 3 blogger on this blog Jul 27, 2010
- Jul 27, 2010 Backing into trouble Jul 27, 2010
- Jul 26, 2010 A contest! Everyone loves a contest! And there are fabulous prizes, too! Jul 26, 2010
- Jul 26, 2010 Clever brats-turned-friends Jul 26, 2010
- Jul 26, 2010 Contrition or liberation? Jul 26, 2010
- Jul 25, 2010 Perhaps my publisher should triple the price of my book Jul 25, 2010
- Jul 24, 2010 Future caveman? Jul 24, 2010
- Jul 24, 2010 Cruel design Jul 24, 2010
- Jul 23, 2010 Nuking the Earth over and over again Jul 23, 2010
- Jul 23, 2010 How am I ever going to explain Ghostbusters to her? Jul 23, 2010
- Jul 23, 2010 Animated Jewish philosopher Jul 23, 2010
- Jul 22, 2010 A friend who understands me completely. Jul 22, 2010
- Jul 22, 2010 Weiner envy Jul 22, 2010
- Jul 22, 2010 When your mom dies… Jul 22, 2010
- Jul 21, 2010 Unanswered questions that will never be answered Jul 21, 2010
- Jul 21, 2010 Stuff your sorrys in a sack Jul 21, 2010
- Jul 21, 2010 Questionable restroom language Jul 21, 2010
- Jul 20, 2010 The majesty of the combine harvester. Oh, and a legitimately bionic cat, too. Jul 20, 2010
- Jul 20, 2010 Lacking less-than-vital information Jul 20, 2010
- Jul 20, 2010 Mired in hip-waggling and scat Jul 20, 2010
- Jul 19, 2010 Organ swapping? Jul 19, 2010
- Jul 19, 2010 It's fine to be a slightly insane parent. Just don't pretend that you're not. Jul 19, 2010
- Jul 18, 2010 The world is slightly less interesting today Jul 18, 2010
- Jul 18, 2010 The Vatican is nothing if not consistent Jul 18, 2010
- Jul 17, 2010 There is never a need to make Journey songs more accessible to children Jul 17, 2010
- Jul 17, 2010 How to write like a simpleton Jul 17, 2010
- Jul 16, 2010 Rumble seats? Jul 16, 2010
- Jul 16, 2010 2007 was not a good year Jul 16, 2010
- Jul 16, 2010 Worst excuse ever Jul 16, 2010
- Jul 15, 2010 Guest blogger: My agent, Taryn Fagerness, explains her life in the foreign rights world Jul 15, 2010
- Jul 15, 2010 Cruelty on display Jul 15, 2010
- Jul 15, 2010 A brave new Snoopy Sno-Cone Maker Jul 15, 2010
- Jul 14, 2010 Three best compliments ever Jul 14, 2010
- Jul 14, 2010 Poverty breeds careful planning and worn-out rubber Jul 14, 2010
- Jul 13, 2010 Friendship rating guidelines Jul 13, 2010
- Jul 13, 2010 It’s coffee. Jul 13, 2010
- Jul 12, 2010 Handsome not always nice Jul 12, 2010
- Jul 12, 2010 This is one way to make me feel inadequate Jul 12, 2010
- Jul 12, 2010 An update on my Big Wheel dream Jul 12, 2010
- Jul 11, 2010 My inner child comes alive Jul 11, 2010
- Jul 11, 2010 Differing views on the nature of a loser Jul 11, 2010
- Jul 11, 2010 My wife's lack of physical descriptors don't prevent me from staring at her constantly Jul 11, 2010
- Jul 10, 2010 Have times really changed that much? Jul 10, 2010
- Jul 10, 2010 Inexplicable loserdom Jul 10, 2010
- Jul 9, 2010 Caps? Bolding? Air quotes? And freakin' Comic Sans? Jul 9, 2010
- Jul 9, 2010 What does she want from me? Jul 9, 2010
- Jul 9, 2010 Still thinking like a kid Jul 9, 2010
- Jul 8, 2010 Separate and unequal recess policies Jul 8, 2010
- Jul 8, 2010 Worst geographic decision ever Jul 8, 2010
- Jul 8, 2010 Where do you get your ideas? Jul 8, 2010
- Jul 7, 2010 Musical quandary Jul 7, 2010
- Jul 7, 2010 Breasts and legs but no sex Jul 7, 2010
- Jul 7, 2010 Which story should I write next? Jul 7, 2010
- Jul 6, 2010 The same color? Jul 6, 2010
- Jul 6, 2010 Getting in trouble Jul 6, 2010
- Jul 6, 2010 Have you ever seen a creepier coffee table? Jul 6, 2010
- Jul 5, 2010 Religious bias and Old Testament catsup Jul 5, 2010
- Jul 5, 2010 Glass-on-glass contact not required Jul 5, 2010
- Jul 4, 2010 Keep it simple Jul 4, 2010
- Jul 3, 2010 Where’s the love? Jul 3, 2010
- Jul 2, 2010 Recognition for SOMETHING MISSING Jul 2, 2010
- Jul 2, 2010 Possible murder scenario Jul 2, 2010
- Jul 2, 2010 Teachers and novelists on Facebook Jul 2, 2010
- Jul 1, 2010 Too many pins dropping in this world… Jul 1, 2010
- Jul 1, 2010 In twenty-five years… again… Jul 1, 2010
- Jul 1, 2010 Resolution update: June 2010 Jul 1, 2010
June 2010
- Jun 30, 2010 Human targets Jun 30, 2010
- Jun 30, 2010 A sickness perhaps, but not a hobby Jun 30, 2010
- Jun 29, 2010 In twenty-five years… Jun 29, 2010
- Jun 29, 2010 Nursery rhymes, my style Jun 29, 2010
- Jun 28, 2010 Melting ice or a bullet in the head? Jun 28, 2010
- Jun 28, 2010 I will pledge whatever my teacher says… Jun 28, 2010
- Jun 27, 2010 Too close for comfort Jun 27, 2010
- Jun 27, 2010 The choice is made! Jun 27, 2010
- Jun 27, 2010 Childhood bogeyman returns Jun 27, 2010
- Jun 27, 2010 DJ blunders and tribulations Jun 27, 2010
- Jun 26, 2010 Spoiled Jun 26, 2010
- Jun 25, 2010 Telltale signs Jun 25, 2010
- Jun 25, 2010 Slacker book club extraordinaire Jun 25, 2010
- Jun 24, 2010 Confirmed perfection Jun 24, 2010
- Jun 24, 2010 Avoid cannibalism under these McSweeney's-referenced circumstances Jun 24, 2010
- Jun 23, 2010 Confronting a coward Jun 23, 2010
- Jun 23, 2010 An absolute out-of-the-park must-read Jun 23, 2010
- Jun 23, 2010 Pay to pray is shameful and disgusting. It needs to end. Jun 23, 2010
- Jun 22, 2010 Monopoly, short and cruel Jun 22, 2010
- Jun 22, 2010 The bird Jun 22, 2010
- Jun 22, 2010 False promises and The Matty Factor Jun 22, 2010
- Jun 21, 2010 A disservice to womankind Jun 21, 2010
- Jun 21, 2010 I did. It didn’t. Jun 21, 2010
- Jun 20, 2010 Mother’s Day kind of sucks. Huh? Jun 20, 2010
- Jun 20, 2010 Elysha rules Jun 20, 2010
- Jun 20, 2010 Please explain Mr. Jobs Jun 20, 2010
- Jun 18, 2010 Golf with an added bonus Jun 18, 2010
- Jun 18, 2010 Bittersweet summer vacation Jun 18, 2010
- Jun 16, 2010 Girl Scout reboot required Jun 16, 2010
- Jun 16, 2010 Delicious and tragic Jun 16, 2010
- Jun 15, 2010 Working hard for the money Jun 15, 2010
- Jun 14, 2010 Ice the bunny Jun 14, 2010
- Jun 14, 2010 Namesake Jun 14, 2010
- Jun 14, 2010 Read, damn it Jun 14, 2010
- Jun 14, 2010 Turkey baster Jun 14, 2010
- Jun 13, 2010 ScissorS Jun 13, 2010
- Jun 13, 2010 Stepping back into history Jun 13, 2010
- Jun 12, 2010 Mass suicide is clearly insane, but the parting of the Red Sea lives in Crazy Town, too. Jun 12, 2010
- Jun 12, 2010 Beware of what? Jun 12, 2010
- Jun 11, 2010 Would I even be hungry? Jun 11, 2010
- Jun 11, 2010 Do I have to be a Frenchy? Jun 11, 2010
- Jun 10, 2010 Possibly maybe potentially exciting. Someday. Maybe. Jun 10, 2010
- Jun 10, 2010 My dream Jun 10, 2010
- Jun 10, 2010 Floor plan of Dunder Mifflin Jun 10, 2010
- Jun 9, 2010 Motivation strategies for employers, teachers and even parents. Jun 9, 2010
- Jun 9, 2010 Death by headphones Jun 9, 2010
- Jun 9, 2010 If you're embarrassed to admit to buying your clothing at Marshall's, then you're an embarrassment to all of humanity. Jun 9, 2010
- Jun 8, 2010 The evils of swashbuckling action and very bad weather. Jun 8, 2010
- Jun 8, 2010 The wondrous vulva Jun 8, 2010
- Jun 7, 2010 Goonies never say die Jun 7, 2010
- Jun 7, 2010 No credit deserved Jun 7, 2010
- Jun 7, 2010 Ultimate business conversion Jun 7, 2010
- Jun 6, 2010 I’m a present-tense hedonist. Jun 6, 2010
- Jun 6, 2010 First instincts usually correct Jun 6, 2010
- Jun 6, 2010 All-access pass Jun 6, 2010
- Jun 5, 2010 Farmer’s tan Jun 5, 2010
- Jun 5, 2010 Tooth fish are tasty Jun 5, 2010
- Jun 4, 2010 Martin is not obsessive compulsive. He's like me. Jun 4, 2010
- Jun 3, 2010 Blame my distaste of broccoli on advertising. Or the lack thereof. Jun 3, 2010
- Jun 2, 2010 Big geek Jun 2, 2010
- Jun 2, 2010 Congrats on your respiration system Jun 2, 2010
- Jun 1, 2010 Disappearing follicles? Jun 1, 2010
- Jun 1, 2010 Resolution update: May 2010 Jun 1, 2010
- Jun 1, 2010 Your child's birth ain’t news Jun 1, 2010
May 2010
- May 31, 2010 Not a T-Rex after all May 31, 2010
- May 31, 2010 Lawyer jokes made easy May 31, 2010
- May 29, 2010 Grossest thing ever May 29, 2010
- May 29, 2010 I found this utterly fascinating May 29, 2010
- May 29, 2010 I’m Popeye the Sailor Man. Or a dinosaur. May 29, 2010
- May 28, 2010 My band of real life super heroes May 28, 2010
- May 28, 2010 In preparation for the summer book tour May 28, 2010
- May 26, 2010 Clara behind the camera May 26, 2010
- May 26, 2010 High-five May 26, 2010
- May 26, 2010 The devil is in the details May 26, 2010
- May 26, 2010 My little book lover May 26, 2010
- May 25, 2010 Three biggest mistakes that parents make May 25, 2010
- May 25, 2010 The annoying gadget guy May 25, 2010
- May 24, 2010 My life May 24, 2010
- May 23, 2010 The rest of the story May 23, 2010
- May 22, 2010 Memories I’d like to forget May 22, 2010
- May 20, 2010 Dead May 20, 2010
- May 20, 2010 Names May 20, 2010
- May 19, 2010 Outsourcing my underwear May 19, 2010
- May 18, 2010 It’s all about the shoes May 18, 2010
- May 18, 2010 The verdict May 18, 2010
- May 17, 2010 Straight-talk May 17, 2010
- May 17, 2010 Too much television May 17, 2010
- May 17, 2010 If you can find ten minutes, you can find the time to write May 17, 2010
- May 16, 2010 Twelve years perhaps? May 16, 2010
- May 16, 2010 2010: Products I can’t live without May 16, 2010
- May 16, 2010 Great moments in academia #2 May 16, 2010
- May 15, 2010 Spite and anger make it happen May 15, 2010
- May 15, 2010 A lack of support May 15, 2010
- May 14, 2010 Shivering or sweaty May 14, 2010
- May 14, 2010 Amusement rides a little too realistic May 14, 2010
- May 13, 2010 Road kill punch May 13, 2010
- May 12, 2010 You can be yourself, but only if you wear a tie May 12, 2010
- May 12, 2010 Betsy Claypool more interesting than Betsy Ross May 12, 2010
- May 11, 2010 Some of us don’t need anymore drama May 11, 2010
- May 11, 2010 I don't think you exist, but that doesn't mean you should yell at me in the brief moments that you do. May 11, 2010
- May 10, 2010 Tick tock May 10, 2010
- May 9, 2010 Peeing was never so fun May 9, 2010
- May 9, 2010 Making my own karma May 9, 2010
- May 9, 2010 Left handed people will tell you: This could not be more true May 9, 2010
- May 8, 2010 What is an alternative lifestyle anymore? May 8, 2010
- May 7, 2010 Cell phones make for more creative writing May 7, 2010
- May 5, 2010 It’s a sewing accomplishment May 5, 2010
- May 5, 2010 No secrets required May 5, 2010
- May 4, 2010 A radish? May 4, 2010
- May 4, 2010 Say no to Fiji May 4, 2010
- May 3, 2010 It should not be this hard… May 3, 2010
- May 3, 2010 Don't try to define dignity for me. Just tell me that I smell and kill me. May 3, 2010
- May 2, 2010 Resolution Update: April 2011 May 2, 2010
- May 1, 2010 I love it when my pithy observation is actually real May 1, 2010
April 2010
- Apr 30, 2010 Skin care gone awry Apr 30, 2010
- Apr 29, 2010 I don’t have a relationship with my electric toothbrush, but I still use it daily Apr 29, 2010
- Apr 28, 2010 Who am I? Apr 28, 2010
- Apr 27, 2010 Trash Apr 27, 2010
- Apr 26, 2010 If the word “common” is in the name… Apr 26, 2010
- Apr 25, 2010 Dueling with my literary agent Apr 25, 2010
- Apr 24, 2010 Can’t stand a snob Apr 24, 2010
- Apr 23, 2010 Great moments in academia: #1 Apr 23, 2010
- Apr 22, 2010 You are probably not real Apr 22, 2010
- Apr 21, 2010 Insecurity Apr 21, 2010
- Apr 21, 2010 Never play halfway Apr 21, 2010
- Apr 20, 2010 Leave my goddamn grass alone. Apr 20, 2010
- Apr 20, 2010 Justified pride? Apr 20, 2010
- Apr 19, 2010 The Hunt for Red October: Good and not so much Apr 19, 2010
- Apr 19, 2010 Deception I tell you! Apr 19, 2010
- Apr 18, 2010 Forgive or else! Apr 18, 2010
- Apr 17, 2010 No cutting Apr 17, 2010
- Apr 16, 2010 Carl Linnaeus is rolling over in his grave Apr 16, 2010
- Apr 15, 2010 I love this quote Apr 15, 2010
- Apr 15, 2010 No neck Apr 15, 2010
- Apr 14, 2010 A 17 to 10 ratio Apr 14, 2010
- Apr 14, 2010 In need of a vigilante Apr 14, 2010
- Apr 13, 2010 Better in my belly than on television Apr 13, 2010
- Apr 13, 2010 Walking display racks Apr 13, 2010
- Apr 12, 2010 Simple and brilliant Apr 12, 2010
- Apr 12, 2010 Not guilty Apr 12, 2010
- Apr 11, 2010 A stranger’s love is worth more Apr 11, 2010
- Apr 11, 2010 The key to understanding the opposite sex Apr 11, 2010
- Apr 10, 2010 Where did all these pillows come from? Apr 10, 2010
- Apr 8, 2010 Litany of addresses Apr 8, 2010
- Apr 8, 2010 I write fiction, and the truth was the best I could do? Apr 8, 2010
- Apr 8, 2010 The best kind of advice Apr 8, 2010
- Apr 7, 2010 Ruining marriages everywhere Apr 7, 2010
- Apr 6, 2010 99 FRECKLES in Germany Apr 6, 2010
- Apr 6, 2010 Middle school playgorund inequity and segregation: Boys and girls separated by a thick, white line Apr 6, 2010
- Apr 6, 2010 Working for free Apr 6, 2010
- Apr 5, 2010 On the precipice of revision Apr 5, 2010
- Apr 4, 2010 The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo: A recap Apr 4, 2010
- Apr 4, 2010 Dessert for dinner Apr 4, 2010
- Apr 3, 2010 Obnoxious and stupid Apr 3, 2010
- Apr 3, 2010 How I found my literary agent Apr 3, 2010
- Apr 2, 2010 Resolution Update: March 2011 Apr 2, 2010
- Apr 2, 2010 Retro eyewear Apr 2, 2010
- Apr 1, 2010 Creed is Creed Apr 1, 2010
March 2010
- Mar 31, 2010 Bugs better than bears Mar 31, 2010
- Mar 31, 2010 To read or not to read Mar 31, 2010
- Mar 31, 2010 It’s a room Mar 31, 2010
- Mar 30, 2010 Witticisms or lacking wit? Mar 30, 2010
- Mar 29, 2010 Fuzzy time tables Mar 29, 2010
- Mar 29, 2010 Longing for happier days Mar 29, 2010
- Mar 29, 2010 Asked and answered Mar 29, 2010
- Mar 28, 2010 I’m saved! Mar 28, 2010
- Mar 28, 2010 Ten Word Wiki Mar 28, 2010
- Mar 27, 2010 Plan A Mar 27, 2010
- Mar 26, 2010 I don’t get it Mar 26, 2010
- Mar 26, 2010 Linguistic complaints Mar 26, 2010
- Mar 26, 2010 Feeling better about myself Mar 26, 2010
- Mar 25, 2010 The Ethicist: Golfing allowed on day two? Mar 25, 2010
- Mar 24, 2010 Does this mean I can get into Heaven? Mar 24, 2010
- Mar 24, 2010 Rules of a gun fight Mar 24, 2010
- Mar 24, 2010 Deprived youth Mar 24, 2010
- Mar 23, 2010 Dregs of the Earth in my baby book Mar 23, 2010
- Mar 23, 2010 Peeing your pants with aplomb Mar 23, 2010
- Mar 22, 2010 Savant Mar 22, 2010
- Mar 22, 2010 A more original and meaningful approach to greeting cards Mar 22, 2010
- Mar 21, 2010 Sad Mar 21, 2010
- Mar 21, 2010 Mortality in three acts Mar 21, 2010
- Mar 20, 2010 My happiness is at risk Mar 20, 2010
- Mar 20, 2010 It’s just better Mar 20, 2010
- Mar 19, 2010 The Ethicist, with a twist Mar 19, 2010
- Mar 19, 2010 An utter lack of pomp and circumstance Mar 19, 2010
- Mar 19, 2010 Not OMG Mar 19, 2010
- Mar 18, 2010 Is television a window into the soul? Mar 18, 2010
- Mar 17, 2010 Stupid Saint Patrick’s Day Mar 17, 2010
- Mar 17, 2010 Sunset of my DJ career Mar 17, 2010
- Mar 16, 2010 World War II in under two minutes Mar 16, 2010
- Mar 16, 2010 A blogging dilemma Mar 16, 2010
- Mar 16, 2010 Conformity Mar 16, 2010
- Mar 15, 2010 Simplicity Mar 15, 2010
- Mar 14, 2010 Little boys in restrooms Mar 14, 2010
- Mar 13, 2010 Two-dimensional parades Mar 13, 2010
- Mar 13, 2010 Old school television Mar 13, 2010
- Mar 12, 2010 The price of an e-book Mar 12, 2010
- Mar 11, 2010 A brief history of my favorite musicians Mar 11, 2010
- Mar 11, 2010 Resolution Update: February 2010 Mar 11, 2010
- Mar 11, 2010 I told you so Mar 11, 2010
- Mar 10, 2010 Most popular at the the moment Mar 10, 2010
- Mar 10, 2010 Mystery fruit Mar 10, 2010
- Mar 9, 2010 The View Mar 9, 2010
- Mar 8, 2010 The Friendship Application Mar 8, 2010
- Mar 8, 2010 Bartering herself into a new career? Maybe. Mar 8, 2010
- Mar 7, 2010 The demise of the book tour and the rise of its replacement Mar 7, 2010
- Mar 6, 2010 Quitting Mar 6, 2010
- Mar 5, 2010 Nothing’s impossible if your religion is based upon a miracles Mar 5, 2010
- Mar 5, 2010 Two kinds of teachers Mar 5, 2010
- Mar 4, 2010 Wardrobe malfunction Mar 4, 2010
- Mar 4, 2010 Kudos for SOMETHING MISSING Mar 4, 2010
- Mar 4, 2010 Joy? Of course. But a source of pride? No. Mar 4, 2010
- Mar 4, 2010 Reunited! And perhaps an idea for a book. Mar 4, 2010
- Mar 3, 2010 I’ll sleep when I’m dead Mar 3, 2010
- Mar 2, 2010 Verbal Sparring 101: English proficiency is required Mar 2, 2010
- Mar 1, 2010 My own Android app, plus SOMETHING MISSING on the iPhone Mar 1, 2010
- Mar 1, 2010 Another bestseller list! Mar 1, 2010
- Mar 1, 2010 Genius name recognition Mar 1, 2010
February 2010
- Feb 28, 2010 Third person nightmare Feb 28, 2010
- Feb 28, 2010 My book has been hijacked by a couple of no-nothings. Feb 28, 2010
- Feb 27, 2010 Vegans. The annoying kind. Feb 27, 2010
- Feb 27, 2010 Enough with the ten minutes Feb 27, 2010
- Feb 26, 2010 The demanded apology: A pathetic, passive aggressive attempt to make someone say words that the don't want to say Feb 26, 2010
- Feb 25, 2010 Brilliant Feb 25, 2010
- Feb 25, 2010 Poisoned before my second birthday Feb 25, 2010
- Feb 24, 2010 Fine is not good enough Feb 24, 2010
- Feb 24, 2010 A mixed bag Feb 24, 2010
- Feb 24, 2010 Either way, I rule. Feb 24, 2010
- Feb 23, 2010 Dream come true times two Feb 23, 2010
- Feb 23, 2010 My wife, the radical noncomformist Feb 23, 2010
- Feb 22, 2010 Imponderables Feb 22, 2010
- Feb 22, 2010 Audio books: The good, the bad and the silly Feb 22, 2010
- Feb 21, 2010 Never again Feb 21, 2010
- Feb 21, 2010 Moose! Feb 21, 2010
- Feb 20, 2010 Hudson recommends SOMETHING MISSING Feb 20, 2010
- Feb 19, 2010 Stuck in the minority Feb 19, 2010
- Feb 19, 2010 Upcoming events Feb 19, 2010
- Feb 18, 2010 Why my wife will never allow me a Freebie List Feb 18, 2010
- Feb 18, 2010 The butterflies were nice. The signage was better. Feb 18, 2010
- Feb 17, 2010 Tough to be a woman. Impossible to live without women. Feb 17, 2010
- Feb 17, 2010 Stop wasting oxygen Feb 17, 2010
- Feb 17, 2010 GAME CHANGE’s alliteration not quite music to my ears Feb 17, 2010
- Feb 16, 2010 Just because we’re accustomed to seeing it doesn’t make it any less ridiculous Feb 16, 2010
- Feb 16, 2010 Heroic me Feb 16, 2010
- Feb 15, 2010 Three little old ladies talking about me Feb 15, 2010
- Feb 15, 2010 In praise of community college Feb 15, 2010
- Feb 14, 2010 BEST GIFT EVER Feb 14, 2010
- Feb 13, 2010 Brilliant band names Feb 13, 2010
- Feb 13, 2010 8 simple rules for requesting music at a wedding Feb 13, 2010
- Feb 12, 2010 A novel idea about a novel idea Feb 12, 2010
- Feb 12, 2010 I couldn’t resist posting… Feb 12, 2010
- Feb 12, 2010 SOMETHING MISSING: The large print version Feb 12, 2010
- Feb 11, 2010 Good advice Feb 11, 2010
- Feb 10, 2010 Answers and coincidences Feb 10, 2010
- Feb 10, 2010 The Man Feb 10, 2010
- Feb 10, 2010 Doubting myself Feb 10, 2010
- Feb 9, 2010 White snow, black swan Feb 9, 2010
- Feb 8, 2010 Ten minutes at a time Feb 8, 2010
- Feb 6, 2010 Galleys arrived! Feb 6, 2010
- Feb 4, 2010 It's my birthday this month! Before giving me (or anyone else) a gift, please read this carefully and adjust accordingly. Feb 4, 2010
- Feb 4, 2010 Bestseller list Feb 4, 2010
- Feb 4, 2010 Where to? Feb 4, 2010
- Feb 4, 2010 Searching for a new dream Feb 4, 2010
- Feb 3, 2010 Foreign deal Feb 3, 2010
- Feb 2, 2010 Goals? Feb 2, 2010
- Feb 1, 2010 A question in need of an answer Feb 1, 2010
- Feb 1, 2010 B Roll Feb 1, 2010
- Feb 1, 2010 Resolution update: January 2010 Feb 1, 2010
January 2010
- Jan 31, 2010 Fresh Voices 2010 Jan 31, 2010
- Jan 28, 2010 Revelation Jan 28, 2010
- Jan 28, 2010 On our way to Misty Valley Books! Jan 28, 2010
- Jan 28, 2010 What I have to say Jan 28, 2010
- Jan 27, 2010 What’s an author to do? Jan 27, 2010
- Jan 27, 2010 Who thought this was a good idea? Jan 27, 2010
- Jan 26, 2010 How to save the independent bookstore: Part 1 Jan 26, 2010
- Jan 25, 2010 You just can’t throw away a man’s crock pot. Can you? Jan 25, 2010
- Jan 25, 2010 Apologies for being so nice Jan 25, 2010
- Jan 24, 2010 Siblings or Dating? Jan 24, 2010
- Jan 24, 2010 Getting through the day Jan 24, 2010
- Jan 23, 2010 Waiting on Hollywood Jan 23, 2010
- Jan 22, 2010 Getting the word out Jan 22, 2010
- Jan 21, 2010 Dagger in the heart Jan 21, 2010
- Jan 20, 2010 Death of the American newspaper Jan 20, 2010
- Jan 20, 2010 What gives, ladies? Jan 20, 2010
- Jan 20, 2010 Why use Twitter? Jan 20, 2010
- Jan 20, 2010 If more Republicans were like this… Yikes. Jan 20, 2010
- Jan 19, 2010 If I ruled the world… Jan 19, 2010
- Jan 19, 2010 Thick skin Jan 19, 2010
- Jan 18, 2010 Frightened Jan 18, 2010
- Jan 18, 2010 “Separate but equal” still alive in Hollywood Jan 18, 2010
- Jan 18, 2010 I was the parent of a teenager, even if some people choose to discount it. Jan 18, 2010
- Jan 17, 2010 Better ways of feeling good about yourself Jan 17, 2010
- Jan 17, 2010 The right thing Jan 17, 2010
- Jan 16, 2010 Toilet wins every time Jan 16, 2010
- Jan 16, 2010 Elmore Leonard’s rules of writing Jan 16, 2010
- Jan 15, 2010 A real life Martin? Jan 15, 2010
- Jan 14, 2010 Make it memorable Jan 14, 2010
- Jan 14, 2010 Star Trek stinks Jan 14, 2010
- Jan 14, 2010 Commas from the gut Jan 14, 2010
- Jan 13, 2010 Johnny Depp, again, and again, and again Jan 13, 2010
- Jan 13, 2010 He’s not OCD. He’s just like me. Jan 13, 2010
- Jan 12, 2010 “Methought I heard a voice cry, 'Sleep no more!” Jan 12, 2010
- Jan 11, 2010 Make your voice heard! Jan 11, 2010
- Jan 10, 2010 Stand up for your food preferences Jan 10, 2010
- Jan 8, 2010 In favor of life coaching Jan 8, 2010
- Jan 7, 2010 Gender gap Jan 7, 2010
- Jan 7, 2010 Broccoli is poison. Seriously. Jan 7, 2010
- Jan 7, 2010 Huh? Jan 7, 2010
- Jan 6, 2010 It’s not my fault that I’m genetically superior Jan 6, 2010
- Jan 6, 2010 Plants have just as much right to life as bacon Jan 6, 2010
- Jan 5, 2010 Ingenious Jan 5, 2010
- Jan 4, 2010 Staring death in the eye Jan 4, 2010
- Jan 4, 2010 Alligator Jan 4, 2010
- Jan 3, 2010 High-five Jan 3, 2010
- Jan 3, 2010 How convenient. You and God believe the same thing! Jan 3, 2010
- Jan 2, 2010 My abyss Jan 2, 2010
- Jan 1, 2010 New Year’s Resolutions: 2010 Jan 1, 2010
- Jan 1, 2010 Resolution update: 2009 in review Jan 1, 2010
- Jan 1, 2010 I can’t help it. Jan 1, 2010
December 2009
- Dec 31, 2009 A decade of neologisms Dec 31, 2009
- Dec 30, 2009 Literary and Pregnancy Dos and Don’ts Dec 30, 2009
- Dec 30, 2009 Best books of 2009 Dec 30, 2009
- Dec 29, 2009 An honor or a disservice? Dec 29, 2009
- Dec 29, 2009 Talented teenager Dec 29, 2009
- Dec 29, 2009 Look! A Democrat who speaks like a Republican! Dec 29, 2009
- Dec 28, 2009 The story of our engagement Dec 28, 2009
- Dec 28, 2009 Rise up, my brothers and sisters! Dec 28, 2009
- Dec 27, 2009 Nothing good can come of it Dec 27, 2009
- Dec 26, 2009 I don’t care if Glenn Beck is on your Christmas list Dec 26, 2009
- Dec 26, 2009 Another review to close out 2009 Dec 26, 2009
- Dec 25, 2009 My 2009 Christmas haul Dec 25, 2009
- Dec 24, 2009 The Simpsons and me Dec 24, 2009
- Dec 23, 2009 What woman buys this stuff? Dec 23, 2009
- Dec 22, 2009 Hollywood does it right Dec 22, 2009
- Dec 21, 2009 Literally singing the praises of books! Dec 21, 2009
- Dec 21, 2009 Uncommonly bad advice Dec 21, 2009
- Dec 21, 2009 No more ring Dec 21, 2009
- Dec 20, 2009 Timing is everything Dec 20, 2009
- Dec 20, 2009 Not cool Dec 20, 2009
- Dec 20, 2009 Holiday treat Dec 20, 2009
- Dec 19, 2009 Challenging literary analysis Dec 19, 2009
- Dec 19, 2009 Bad book covers Dec 19, 2009
- Dec 18, 2009 A likely excuse Dec 18, 2009
- Dec 17, 2009 Honesty gets you nowhere Dec 17, 2009
- Dec 17, 2009 Best response ever Dec 17, 2009
- Dec 15, 2009 New name. New design. Same writer. Dec 15, 2009
- Dec 15, 2009 Judging people based upon viewing choices Dec 15, 2009
- Dec 15, 2009 Rock opera update Dec 15, 2009
- Dec 14, 2009 Handerpants! Dec 14, 2009
- Dec 14, 2009 Perfection Dec 14, 2009
- Dec 14, 2009 Leadership begins with the Lord. And castration. Dec 14, 2009
- Dec 13, 2009 The kindness of strangers Dec 13, 2009
- Dec 12, 2009 Pen names Dec 12, 2009
- Dec 11, 2009 People-pleasers Dec 11, 2009
- Dec 10, 2009 Like one great big pinball machine Dec 10, 2009
- Dec 9, 2009 Saving the best Dec 9, 2009
- Dec 9, 2009 Milo in Germany Dec 9, 2009
- Dec 9, 2009 How Many of Me? Dec 9, 2009
- Dec 8, 2009 White, fluffy drama Dec 8, 2009
- Dec 8, 2009 Goodness Dec 8, 2009
- Dec 8, 2009 Tortured soul. Thankfully not me. Dec 8, 2009
- Dec 7, 2009 Broken eggs are always funny Dec 7, 2009
- Dec 6, 2009 Bad Santa Dec 6, 2009
- Dec 6, 2009 A war of words inside my head Dec 6, 2009
- Dec 5, 2009 Available for pre-order Dec 5, 2009
- Dec 5, 2009 Potato chips, dead people and armed barbers Dec 5, 2009
- Dec 4, 2009 Overconfidence Dec 4, 2009
- Dec 3, 2009 This could work… Dec 3, 2009
- Dec 3, 2009 Resolution update: November 2009 Dec 3, 2009
- Dec 2, 2009 You can put lipstick on a pig… Dec 2, 2009
- Dec 1, 2009 Tuesday Teaser Dec 1, 2009
- Dec 1, 2009 That’s my book! Dec 1, 2009
- Dec 1, 2009 A glimpse into the past Dec 1, 2009
November 2009
- Nov 30, 2009 All good news Nov 30, 2009
- Nov 30, 2009 What to say? Nov 30, 2009
- Nov 30, 2009 Tick tock… time’s a wasting Nov 30, 2009
- Nov 29, 2009 Why? Nov 29, 2009
- Nov 28, 2009 Write a book Nov 28, 2009
- Nov 27, 2009 “I demand that she be fired!” said the moronic dolt. Nov 27, 2009
- Nov 27, 2009 Can I put my hand on your butt without offending? Nov 27, 2009
- Nov 26, 2009 Empires fall Nov 26, 2009
- Nov 26, 2009 A Thanksgiving offering Nov 26, 2009
- Nov 25, 2009 In need of a copyeditor. And a brain. Nov 25, 2009
- Nov 24, 2009 Music critics: A dying breed? Nov 24, 2009
- Nov 23, 2009 Write like Palin! Nov 23, 2009
- Nov 23, 2009 internet Nov 23, 2009
- Nov 23, 2009 Waiting is the worst Nov 23, 2009
- Nov 23, 2009 Tackle football one more time. Please? Nov 23, 2009
- Nov 22, 2009 New website up and running Nov 22, 2009
- Nov 19, 2009 I hope he’s right Nov 19, 2009
- Nov 19, 2009 Hoping for disaster. Again. Nov 19, 2009
- Nov 18, 2009 Happy to be alive Nov 18, 2009
- Nov 17, 2009 Uniformity be damned! Nov 17, 2009
- Nov 16, 2009 Because you CAN have too many… Nov 16, 2009
- Nov 16, 2009 Sneak attack averted Nov 16, 2009
- Nov 16, 2009 Out of the mouths of babes (Psalm 8: 1-2) Nov 16, 2009
- Nov 16, 2009 Perhaps they are not quite dead just yet Nov 16, 2009
- Nov 15, 2009 To each his own. Right? I hope? Nov 15, 2009
- Nov 14, 2009 Dedication decision Nov 14, 2009
- Nov 13, 2009 Great literary opportunities tomorrow! Nov 13, 2009
- Nov 13, 2009 Strange things afoot at the Circle K Nov 13, 2009
- Nov 12, 2009 Death #2 Nov 12, 2009
- Nov 11, 2009 Old fashioned book burning: Follow-up Nov 11, 2009
- Nov 11, 2009 Death #1 Nov 11, 2009
- Nov 10, 2009 Dedication for UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO Nov 10, 2009
- Nov 9, 2009 On good authority, I haven’t changed a bit Nov 9, 2009
- Nov 8, 2009 Hometown appearance Nov 8, 2009
- Nov 7, 2009 We can’t possibly be this desperate for ideas Nov 7, 2009
- Nov 6, 2009 Brutal Nov 6, 2009
- Nov 6, 2009 My hometown Nov 6, 2009
- Nov 6, 2009 Editor at all hours Nov 6, 2009
- Nov 5, 2009 Admitting my failure Nov 5, 2009
- Nov 4, 2009 Briarwood and Beyond, but no coffee, please. Nov 4, 2009
- Nov 3, 2009 Loving me some new vocabulary Nov 3, 2009
- Nov 3, 2009 AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com Nov 3, 2009
- Nov 2, 2009 Capturing the essence of life Nov 2, 2009
- Nov 1, 2009 Honesty translates into respect Nov 1, 2009
October 2009
- Oct 31, 2009 Don't compliment students. One kid's compliment is another kid's insult. Restaurant staffers also take note. Oct 31, 2009
- Oct 30, 2009 Promoting sexism? Maybe. But will anyone care? Oct 30, 2009
- Oct 29, 2009 Strange days Oct 29, 2009
- Oct 29, 2009 Free Oct 29, 2009
- Oct 28, 2009 Where have all the rebels gone? Oct 28, 2009
- Oct 28, 2009 An homage to great storytellers everywhere Oct 28, 2009
- Oct 27, 2009 Wash, rinse, dry, repeat Oct 27, 2009
- Oct 27, 2009 Worst million dollars ever Oct 27, 2009
- Oct 26, 2009 Once more with feeling, for all you Buffy fans Oct 26, 2009
- Oct 26, 2009 Stupid name Oct 26, 2009
- Oct 26, 2009 Many hands make light work Oct 26, 2009
- Oct 25, 2009 This is my new favorite photo of my daughter Oct 25, 2009
- Oct 25, 2009 Kudos from readers in Greece and Norway Oct 25, 2009
- Oct 25, 2009 A day at the movies Oct 25, 2009
- Oct 23, 2009 Martin’s eBay expertise garners some attention Oct 23, 2009
- Oct 23, 2009 Worth paying a second college tuition Oct 23, 2009
- Oct 22, 2009 If only… Oct 22, 2009
- Oct 22, 2009 Borders Books in Farmington, CT Oct 22, 2009
- Oct 22, 2009 MUST LISTEN Oct 22, 2009
- Oct 21, 2009 Vying for a spot on The Moth Oct 21, 2009
- Oct 20, 2009 Writers Read Oct 20, 2009
- Oct 20, 2009 Tears and snots for just one book so far Oct 20, 2009
- Oct 19, 2009 Life magazine for free! Oct 19, 2009
- Oct 19, 2009 This artificially-flavored book is not dedicated to you. Oct 19, 2009
- Oct 18, 2009 Zombies! Oct 18, 2009
- Oct 18, 2009 Water Street Books Oct 18, 2009
- Oct 17, 2009 Not all books should be recorded Oct 17, 2009
- Oct 17, 2009 Giving hotdogs a bad name Oct 17, 2009
- Oct 17, 2009 Raven Oct 17, 2009
- Oct 16, 2009 Ten-year-old genius Oct 16, 2009
- Oct 16, 2009 Old fashioned book burning Oct 16, 2009
- Oct 15, 2009 Death is not a deterrent Oct 15, 2009
- Oct 14, 2009 Out of print but still in demand Oct 14, 2009
- Oct 13, 2009 Bad day Oct 13, 2009
- Oct 13, 2009 Okay. Maybe there was one more youthful indiscretion Oct 13, 2009
- Oct 12, 2009 My crime-riddled past Oct 12, 2009
- Oct 11, 2009 Revelation! Oct 11, 2009
- Oct 11, 2009 Characters named after electronic device addiction and sexually transmitted diseases Oct 11, 2009
- Oct 11, 2009 BEST FLAG EVER Oct 11, 2009
- Oct 11, 2009 Deep thoughts Oct 11, 2009
- Oct 11, 2009 Resolution update: September 2009 Oct 11, 2009
- Oct 10, 2009 The invincible Scott, and then everyone else Oct 10, 2009
- Oct 9, 2009 No neck Oct 9, 2009
- Oct 7, 2009 Book of the Month Oct 7, 2009
- Oct 7, 2009 Short story conundrum Oct 7, 2009
- Oct 6, 2009 Busy! Oct 6, 2009
- Oct 5, 2009 Axis of evil in my baby book Oct 5, 2009
- Oct 5, 2009 Sometimes a book can speak directly to your heart Oct 5, 2009
- Oct 4, 2009 Cursive writing: Expendable? Oct 4, 2009
- Oct 4, 2009 Great speech. Lousy bedside manner. Oct 4, 2009
- Oct 3, 2009 How does anyone keep with with this magazine? Oct 3, 2009
- Oct 2, 2009 Credit to the copyeditor Oct 2, 2009
- Oct 1, 2009 A question of origin Oct 1, 2009
September 2009
- Sep 30, 2009 Subtitles be gone! Sep 30, 2009
- Sep 29, 2009 Turkey for the win Sep 29, 2009
- Sep 28, 2009 When death interrupts the writing process Sep 28, 2009
- Sep 27, 2009 Brandi Terry is a big fat idiot Sep 27, 2009
- Sep 25, 2009 Luke and Luc Sep 25, 2009
- Sep 24, 2009 The half-finished book Sep 24, 2009
- Sep 22, 2009 Consider the source Sep 22, 2009
- Sep 22, 2009 Visiting Westport with Margot Berwin Sep 22, 2009
- Sep 20, 2009 The Island of Misfit Books Sep 20, 2009
- Sep 20, 2009 Be prepared. Sep 20, 2009
- Sep 20, 2009 A float has to float Sep 20, 2009
- Sep 19, 2009 Difficult to defend Dan Sep 19, 2009
- Sep 17, 2009 First peek at UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO’s cover Sep 17, 2009
- Sep 16, 2009 High expectations Sep 16, 2009
- Sep 16, 2009 Ice cream connoisseur Sep 16, 2009
- Sep 15, 2009 Upcoming appearances Sep 15, 2009
- Sep 14, 2009 In the presence of Nicholson Baker Sep 14, 2009
- Sep 13, 2009 Must listen Sep 13, 2009
- Sep 12, 2009 SOMETHING MISSING: the audio book Sep 12, 2009
- Sep 10, 2009 Stupid, annoying plot Sep 10, 2009
- Sep 10, 2009 Just don’t be ordinary Sep 10, 2009
- Sep 9, 2009 Praise for SOMETHING MISSING Sep 9, 2009
- Sep 9, 2009 The Ugly Duckling is uglier than I thought Sep 9, 2009
- Sep 8, 2009 Guest blogger Ann O’Connell shares a story of awkwardness, love and possible spurs Sep 8, 2009
- Sep 7, 2009 Foiled by meat Sep 7, 2009
- Sep 5, 2009 Golf and writing bear the same fruits Sep 5, 2009
- Sep 4, 2009 Many hands make light work Sep 4, 2009
- Sep 4, 2009 Soundtrack people Sep 4, 2009
- Sep 3, 2009 Boston Globe review Sep 3, 2009
- Sep 2, 2009 My little boy, or girl, is all grown up (I hope) Sep 2, 2009
- Sep 2, 2009 You had to read the whole list before getting upset? Sep 2, 2009
- Sep 1, 2009 Stranger than fiction Sep 1, 2009
August 2009
- Aug 31, 2009 Resolution update: August 2009 Aug 31, 2009
- Aug 29, 2009 More attention for SOMETHING MISSING Aug 29, 2009
- Aug 28, 2009 Unfortunate mistaken identity Aug 28, 2009
- Aug 27, 2009 Does the multiple-author format make more sense? Aug 27, 2009
- Aug 26, 2009 Appearing at the Wilton Library Aug 26, 2009
- Aug 25, 2009 My bee sting Aug 25, 2009
- Aug 25, 2009 Is there value in publishing a first draft? Aug 25, 2009
- Aug 24, 2009 Twitter friends Aug 24, 2009
- Aug 24, 2009 A change in style Aug 24, 2009
- Aug 23, 2009 Five year plan? Aug 23, 2009
- Aug 22, 2009 Well-timed and welcomed! Aug 22, 2009
- Aug 21, 2009 Uncomfortable plot summaries Aug 21, 2009
- Aug 20, 2009 .2%? Aug 20, 2009
- Aug 19, 2009 Subconscious naming of characters Aug 19, 2009
- Aug 18, 2009 Real-life burglars Aug 18, 2009
- Aug 18, 2009 Instant communication Aug 18, 2009
- Aug 17, 2009 Come chat with me Aug 17, 2009
- Aug 16, 2009 A fine day Aug 16, 2009
- Aug 16, 2009 Interview at RJ Julia Aug 16, 2009
- Aug 15, 2009 Capping off a perfect day Aug 15, 2009
- Aug 14, 2009 New York Times Sunday Book Review! Aug 14, 2009
- Aug 14, 2009 RJ Julia appearance Aug 14, 2009
- Aug 13, 2009 In good company Aug 13, 2009
- Aug 12, 2009 Work space Aug 12, 2009
- Aug 11, 2009 A different kind of children’s literature Aug 11, 2009
- Aug 10, 2009 New York Times Book Review! Aug 10, 2009
- Aug 10, 2009 Redundant Aug 10, 2009
- Aug 8, 2009 Readers and booksellers making my day Aug 8, 2009
- Aug 7, 2009 If not me, how about Dr. Ruth? Aug 7, 2009
- Aug 6, 2009 Words not required Aug 6, 2009
- Aug 5, 2009 Forgotten Bookmarks (and a new book idea) Aug 5, 2009
- Aug 4, 2009 Just the facts: Redux Aug 4, 2009
- Aug 4, 2009 Worlds collide Aug 4, 2009
- Aug 3, 2009 First appearance Aug 3, 2009
- Aug 2, 2009 Just the facts Aug 2, 2009
- Aug 1, 2009 Treats for Cindy Aug 1, 2009
July 2009
- Jul 31, 2009 A good way to waste time Jul 31, 2009
- Jul 30, 2009 I won’t be reading it to my daughter Jul 30, 2009
- Jul 30, 2009 Book club suggestions Jul 30, 2009
- Jul 30, 2009 First appearance Jul 30, 2009
- Jul 30, 2009 Uncles can apparently sell books, too. Jul 30, 2009
- Jul 29, 2009 The best of all booksellers Jul 29, 2009
- Jul 29, 2009 In the wild Jul 29, 2009
- Jul 28, 2009 Republican or Democrat, it’s bad, bad writing Jul 28, 2009
- Jul 27, 2009 How my writing was interrupted today Jul 27, 2009
- Jul 27, 2009 Another review Jul 27, 2009
- Jul 26, 2009 SOMETHING MISSING miscellany Jul 26, 2009
- Jul 25, 2009 Proposed deletions from the canon Jul 25, 2009
- Jul 23, 2009 First sentences, now with ultraviolent zombie mayhem! Jul 23, 2009
- Jul 22, 2009 Tool of the trade Jul 22, 2009
- Jul 21, 2009 More praise Jul 21, 2009
- Jul 21, 2009 To write or to revise? Jul 21, 2009
- Jul 20, 2009 News on SOMETHING MISSING Jul 20, 2009
- Jul 19, 2009 Front page day Jul 19, 2009
- Jul 18, 2009 Amazon sales ranking Jul 18, 2009
- Jul 18, 2009 Is SOMETHING MISSING a bestseller yet? Jul 18, 2009
- Jul 18, 2009 My favorite words Jul 18, 2009
- Jul 18, 2009 Is there an aesthetic to the written word? Jul 18, 2009
- Jul 17, 2009 Skipping his best material Jul 17, 2009
- Jul 16, 2009 Inaccessible and annoying Jul 16, 2009
- Jul 15, 2009 Technology and my beginnings as a writer Jul 15, 2009
- Jul 14, 2009 In stores at last! Jul 14, 2009
- Jul 13, 2009 Least favorite words Jul 13, 2009
- Jul 13, 2009 One day to go… Jul 13, 2009
- Jul 12, 2009 SOMETHING MISSING in the Boston Globe! Jul 12, 2009
- Jul 11, 2009 Guest review of SOMETHING MISSING Jul 11, 2009
- Jul 10, 2009 Star Trek: Coincidentally flawed Jul 10, 2009
- Jul 9, 2009 SOMETHING MISSING making a name for itself Jul 9, 2009
- Jul 9, 2009 Group descriptors Jul 9, 2009
- Jul 8, 2009 Literary love connections Jul 8, 2009
- Jul 7, 2009 Book covers Jul 7, 2009
- Jul 6, 2009 UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO: A synopsis Jul 6, 2009
- Jul 5, 2009 Poor but happy Jul 5, 2009
- Jul 3, 2009 Writer’s Digest article online Jul 3, 2009
- Jul 2, 2009 Book deal! Jul 2, 2009
- Jul 1, 2009 Book clubs: A good use of my time? Or just plain fun? Jul 1, 2009
June 2009
- Jun 30, 2009 The Dark Tower: A must read Jun 30, 2009
- Jun 29, 2009 The actual book! Jun 29, 2009
- Jun 28, 2009 RJ Julia Jun 28, 2009
- Jun 27, 2009 Odd business combinations. Again. Jun 27, 2009
- Jun 26, 2009 Product placement Jun 26, 2009
- Jun 22, 2009 Writer’s Digest feature Jun 22, 2009
- Jun 21, 2009 Odd business combinations Jun 21, 2009
- Jun 17, 2009 Pride and Prejudice and Zombies! Jun 17, 2009
- Jun 17, 2009 Drippy and syrupy and just plain inexplicable Jun 17, 2009
- Jun 15, 2009 Collection of ideas Jun 15, 2009
- Jun 15, 2009 Best place to think Jun 15, 2009
- Jun 13, 2009 What type are you? Jun 13, 2009
- Jun 12, 2009 Guilt-free book club Jun 12, 2009
- Jun 11, 2009 Customer reviews of SOMETHING MISSING Jun 11, 2009
- Jun 10, 2009 Twenty-car pile-up of ideas in my head Jun 10, 2009
- Jun 9, 2009 A word by any other name is not a word Jun 9, 2009
- Jun 8, 2009 Popularity contest Jun 8, 2009
- Jun 6, 2009 New use for SOMETHING MISSING. I think. Jun 6, 2009
- Jun 4, 2009 A teacher forever Jun 4, 2009
- Jun 2, 2009 Loving librarians Jun 2, 2009
- Jun 1, 2009 Another review! Jun 1, 2009
May 2009
- May 28, 2009 Solving problems May 28, 2009
- May 26, 2009 Second review! May 26, 2009
- May 25, 2009 First review May 25, 2009
- May 25, 2009 My new hero May 25, 2009
- May 24, 2009 Latest adventures with my book club May 24, 2009
- May 22, 2009 Much improved May 22, 2009
- May 21, 2009 New Yorker insider May 21, 2009
- May 19, 2009 Two. Period. May 19, 2009
- May 18, 2009 Bad dialogue May 18, 2009
- May 17, 2009 Abbreviated May 17, 2009
- May 15, 2009 The good and the bad May 15, 2009
- May 13, 2009 Fiction set in real life May 13, 2009
- May 7, 2009 Old man May 7, 2009
- May 6, 2009 In good company May 6, 2009
- May 5, 2009 I pity the publisher… May 5, 2009
- May 4, 2009 Characters and their names May 4, 2009
April 2009
- Apr 29, 2009 Not acting my age Apr 29, 2009
- Apr 27, 2009 Storytelling on Twitter Apr 27, 2009
- Apr 24, 2009 Experience counts Apr 24, 2009
- Apr 21, 2009 USA Today! Today! Apr 21, 2009
- Apr 20, 2009 Wyatt of Rockport, Massachusetts Apr 20, 2009
- Apr 19, 2009 Odd titles Apr 19, 2009
- Apr 17, 2009 Interruption Apr 17, 2009
- Apr 15, 2009 A reader's guide Apr 15, 2009
- Apr 14, 2009 A dangerous career Apr 14, 2009
- Apr 13, 2009 Not religious. Not spiritual. Apr 13, 2009
- Apr 12, 2009 Morrison victorious Apr 12, 2009
- Apr 11, 2009 More from Vonnegut Apr 11, 2009
March 2009
- Mar 29, 2009 Fighting with my agent (sort of) Mar 29, 2009
- Mar 25, 2009 Source material Mar 25, 2009
- Mar 22, 2009 Dream sequences suck Mar 22, 2009
- Mar 20, 2009 Tournament of Books Mar 20, 2009
- Mar 15, 2009 Lies Mar 15, 2009
- Mar 14, 2009 Acknowledgements page Mar 14, 2009
- Mar 11, 2009 Trade paper Mar 11, 2009
- Mar 9, 2009 Loving the Germans Mar 9, 2009
- Mar 8, 2009 Do you like writing? Mar 8, 2009
- Mar 4, 2009 Lunacy or brilliance? Mar 4, 2009
- Mar 3, 2009 News from the German front Mar 3, 2009
- Mar 1, 2009 First sentences Mar 1, 2009
February 2009
- Feb 28, 2009 A new start Feb 28, 2009
- Feb 23, 2009 More kind words Feb 23, 2009
- Feb 22, 2009 goodreads.com Feb 22, 2009
- Feb 21, 2009 Anyone can write Feb 21, 2009
- Feb 20, 2009 Finished Feb 20, 2009
- Feb 17, 2009 The changing landscape of publishing Feb 17, 2009
- Feb 16, 2009 Not my cup of tea Feb 16, 2009
- Feb 15, 2009 More on the Border's Book Club selection Feb 15, 2009
- Feb 11, 2009 Border's Book Club selection Feb 11, 2009
- Feb 10, 2009 Mom Feb 10, 2009
- Feb 5, 2009 The next book Feb 5, 2009
- Feb 4, 2009 My actual office Feb 4, 2009
- Feb 3, 2009 My office Feb 3, 2009
January 2009
- Jan 28, 2009 John Updike, 1932-2009 Jan 28, 2009
- Jan 26, 2009 Clara Susan Dicks and a couple pages too Jan 26, 2009
- Jan 24, 2009 25 Things Jan 24, 2009
- Jan 21, 2009 Kind words Jan 21, 2009
- Jan 20, 2009 The end is in sight Jan 20, 2009
- Jan 18, 2009 Pieces of me Jan 18, 2009
- Jan 16, 2009 Punctuation matters Jan 16, 2009
- Jan 15, 2009 Good week Jan 15, 2009
- Jan 12, 2009 Nicholson Baker and me Jan 12, 2009
- Jan 3, 2009 I have no idea what pants I'm wearing Jan 3, 2009
December 2008
- Dec 30, 2008 The unexpected Dec 30, 2008
- Dec 26, 2008 My beginning Dec 26, 2008
- Dec 20, 2008 My writing group Dec 20, 2008
- Dec 17, 2008 International Dec 17, 2008
- Dec 17, 2008 One step closer Dec 17, 2008
- Dec 16, 2008 Strunk, White and the placenta Dec 16, 2008
- Dec 15, 2008 How to make your wife cry Dec 15, 2008
- Dec 11, 2008 Literary and humorous Dec 11, 2008
- Dec 10, 2008 Stealing from real life Dec 10, 2008
- Dec 9, 2008 When to revise? Dec 9, 2008
- Dec 6, 2008 Something Missing on Facebook Dec 6, 2008
- Dec 1, 2008 Division of labor Dec 1, 2008
November 2008
- Nov 28, 2008 Quick reads Nov 28, 2008
- Nov 27, 2008 More excited than me Nov 27, 2008
- Nov 24, 2008 Finding the right literary agent Nov 24, 2008
- Nov 20, 2008 Inappropriate language Nov 20, 2008
- Nov 20, 2008 Supplementary reading Nov 20, 2008
- Nov 20, 2008 Character first Nov 20, 2008
- Nov 19, 2008 Unexpected Nov 19, 2008
- Nov 18, 2008 So it begins... Nov 18, 2008

Matthew Dicks

Matthew Dicks

Grin and Bare It

Matthew Dicks

Matthew Dicks