A correction, an explanation, an inexplicable bit of British advice and a forgotten ferret
/A few updates on recent posts:
Last week I wrote about Paul McCartney’s recent decision to absolve Yoko Ono of any responsibility for the Beatles breakup, referring to him as a “jerk face” for having waited so long.
It turns out that McCartney has asserted this in the past, despite stories in Slate, TIME, Rolling Stone and The Daily Beast which seemed to imply otherwise.
Apologies to Paul, though I don’t think he reads my blog.
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Last week, as part of my unfair assumption series, I stated that men who own ferrets are immature and likely unemployable.
It turns out that one of my oldest friends owns a ferret. I had forgotten. Or maybe I never knew.
Either way, he has been gainfully employed for a very long time, but even he might accept the immature tag to a certain degree.
Nevertheless, I still stand by my unfair assumption as a general rule but not universal truth.
There are always exception, people. I get that.
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In terms of my recent unfair assumption that people who back into parking spots are at best irrational and more likely insane, the reaction to that post (and there was a lot) was 90/10 in favor of me. Those who disagreed, however, were vehement in their protest.
First, let me state what I thought was obvious:
There are times when backing into a parking spot makes perfect sense. You’re attending a Springsteen concert and you’re parking your car in a garage. Knowing how difficult it will be to exit after the concert, you back your car into the parking spot in hopes of making your escape a little easier.
Of course this makes sense.
My unfair assumption (which is still unfair) was directed at those who always back into parking spots. My rationale is this:
Backing up a car is more difficult than driving forward.
If you can’t agree to this, I don’t want to argue with you. You’re already completely irrational.
Since all rationale people agree that backing up a car is more difficult than driving forward, it makes no sense to back your car into a limited, defined space and run the risk of hitting a car on either side or having to repeat the process because you ended up close to the line or another car.
When you back out of a parking space, you have the entire lane to back into, with as much room as needed. There is no danger of hitting a parked car or ending up too close to a parked car when backing out of space. The lane is wide open.
Some people claimed that backing into a space provides for a quicker exit. While I agree, I would argue that it also provides a considerably slower entry, and the time saved during the exit is miniscule compared to the time wasted backing in.
Be honest: How many times have you seen someone backing into a parking spot, only to have to pull out and begin backing up again because he or she misjudged their car’s position or did a poor job backing in the first time?
This happens all the time. And oftentimes we have to wait for the irrational driver to get it right before we can drive past him or her.
I once worked with a woman who required three or four tries before managing to back the car into a parking spot, and she did this every single day for the twelve years that I worked with her. She, too, claimed that backing in allowed for a quicker exit, but the time wasted backing in and out of the parking spot every day was astounding.
One of my UK readers wrote:
In the UK, driving schools you get taught to back into a parking spot whenever possible. In fact, my instructor used to say “Don’t be a nosy parker!” so that I’d remember!
I am still awaiting a reason for this insanity.