We bought an IKEA step stool. Thanks to the directions, we know not to look closely at it.

The rules are simple (at least according to the slip of paper found in the box):

  • Don’t place the stepstool’s legs atop a pile of books.
  • Don’t place one of the stepstool’s legs atop a pile of books.
  • Don’t purchase two stools and use them as large, cumbersome stilts.
  • Don’t look closely at the stool with a magnifying glass.
  • Don’t dive off the stool headfirst into a wall.

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Credit my wife for finding this ridiculous bit of insanity.