You are a stupid person who cannot drive

This evening I was cut off by a woman who clearly did not believe in speed limits, turn signals or the willingness to acknowledge other cars on the road. After managing to position her car in front of mine, I watched as she proceeded to creep forward into the crosswalk of three consecutive intersections while awaiting for a red light to turn green, as if the fifteen feet that she saved by partially blocking traffic would dramatically improve her position on the road or allow her to arrive at her destination any faster.

She was clearly a stupid person, and my inability to tell her as much was quite annoying.

Part of me wanted to follow her until she reached her destination, so that I could exit my car and inform her of how fundamentally stupid she was.

The more reasonable part of me suspected that my wife, who was in the car at the time, would not willingly stalk this woman with me, and it was this part of me that kept me from following her when she failed to turn onto my street.

But I wish there were a way to communicate with stupid people like this on the road. Not those drivers who are victimized by bad luck or an unexpected blind spot.

I’m talking about the kind of people who consistently drive like selfish idiots.

And don’t get me wrong. I have no expectation of improving these anyone’s driving skills. Once an idiot, always an idiot.

I’m just desirous of a little satisfaction through the beauty of unsolicited criticism.