A perfect combination of glitter, revenge, and the US Postal Service: My kind of company

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Have you heard about ShipYourEnemiesGlitter.com? It’s brilliant.

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From the company’s FAQs:

We'll vomit up a ton of glitter and put it in an envelope with your recipients address on the front of it. We'll also include a note telling them how awful they are which will be folded within.

Not the best couple sentences, to be honest. Explaining where the recipient’s address will appear on the envelope (on the front of it) is a little ridiculous, and similarly, explaining where the note will be placed (folded within) seems fairly obvious. Still, these are my kind of people.

I only have two problems with this company:

  1. The amount of swearing on their website would seem to limit their customer base while providing little in return. Perhaps they hope that the language would enhance their image as bad ass nonconformists, but the company maliciously sends glitter on customers’ behalf. They are already bad ass nonconformists. The language wasn’t needed.
  2. The glitter, unless specified otherwise, is sent anonymously. Anonymous communication is the medium of the cowardly and the stupid. I would prefer that the company require customers to provide a name.   

Nevertheless, I plan on using this service, at least once and perhaps often, and I plan to send my glitter with the appropriate attribution.

The real question is this: Who first?

I suggested a name to my wife last night, and she said no. That doesn’t mean he or she (it’s a he) is out of the woods yet. I simply risk my wife’s admittedly powerful, disapproving stare if I move forward on this target.

But he kind of deserves it. And it’s only glitter…