No more home runs. Please. I’m begging you.

Omar Infante hit the first home run by a member of the Miami Marlins at Marlin’s Park yesterday, setting off the stadium’s “home run feature” for the first time.

Congratulations, Miami Marlins. You’ve found a way to make home runs so unpalatable that your fans will likely be rooting for long, fly balls to bounce off the outfield fences for double or triples instead of round trippers.

Honestly, what in hell were they thinking?