A contest! Everyone loves a contest! And there are fabulous prizes, too!

Okay, I have a contest, and hopefully enough of my readers will be interested to make it worthwhile.

On August 25, I will be appearing at WORD in Brooklyn, NY as part of my book tour for UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO.  As part of the promotion for the event, WORD has created a webpage that provides the details about the appearance. 

Included on WORD’s website is a short bio of myself, which was written almost two years ago when the promotion for SOMETHING MISSING was just beginning.  In looking at the bio now, it’s looking a little old and decrepit.

Here is how it currently reads: 

MATTHEW DICKS is the author of Something Missing. He teaches elementary school and in 2005 was named West Hartford’s Teacher of the Year. He also owns and operates a DJ company that performs at weddings throughout Connecticut when he isn’t shaping the minds of his class of fifth-graders. He lives in Newington, CT, with his wife; baby daughter, Clara; Lhasa Apso, Kaleigh; and two enormous, slightly insane house cats, Jack and Owen. For more information, please visit Matthew’s website at: www.matthewdicks.com, and check out his blog at:http://matthewdicks.com.

Please note:

The bio mentions Jack, a cat who sadly passed away last summer.

It mentions the name of my dog, my cat and my daughter, but not my wife.

It does not mention UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO at all.

I’m thinking it’s time for a refresh.

This is where you come in. 

Write a brand new bio for me.  Whether you are my best friend or a reader of my books who I have yet to meet, take a stab at crafting a new biography for use in my promotional material.  Include any information that you feel is pertinent.  Be creative.  Be unique.  Use this blog as a source of information about me, as well as any other sources that you may find online.  I have been interviewed by a number of new outlets and you should be able to find lots of odd bits and bytes about me if you look hard enough.  Feel free to ask me questions through email if you require more information.  The more originality, the better. 

If I love your submission, you win!  And if I really love it, I will submit it to my publicist for use as my new bio.  No promises.  I may take the liberty of editing your work a bit, and I may be tempted to combine two or three bios into one uber-bio, but I will attempt to use as much or all of the winner’s work as possible, and I will give you full credit for your work here on the blog.  

Oh, and of course, there are prizes. 

If your bio is chosen as the winner, I will send you signed copies of both my books (SOMETHING MISSING and UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO), as well as the galley to my third book, once the book is completed, sold and the galley is produced.  In addition, I will also send you a signed copy of the German version of SOMETHING MISSING, which was re titled THE GOOD THEIF because of an arcane German law, and of which I have more than a few copies. 

Good enough to get you to participate?  I hope so!

Here are the details:

The contest begins today and ends on Friday, August 13. 

Send all submissions and any questions you have for me to matthewdicks@gmail.com.

Please keep submissions under 250 words.

You may enter as many times as you’d like.  Send a sappy entry, a silly entry, a serious entry and a sublime entry.  Quadruple your odds of winning!

Please refrain from any profanity in the bio.  Not that you ever would. 

And I think that’s it. 

Any questions?  Please post here.

Otherwise, get to work!  Be original.  Be amusing.  Be informative.  Be unique.  I want a bio that tells a reader who I am but also stands apart from the standard author bio.  So kooky, quirky and utterly bizarre might be just up my alley!

Now get writing!

In preparation for the summer book tour

This summer, I will be appearing at bookstores throughout New England and New York in order to promote my second book, UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO.  Last year I appeared in about two dozen locations throughout New England, and at each stop, there were people waiting to hear me speak. 

Sometimes the audiences were large.  At a couple of joint-author appearances, we had close to a hundred people in attendance.  There were a number of library stops where I had fifty or more people sitting in the audience.  At other locations, a small group of six or eight readers were awaiting my arrival.  While it’s not terribly productive or profitable to drive an hour or two in order to meet half a dozen readers, I was thankful to have never been greeted by a room of empty chairs, and I appreciated every reader who was willing to come out and listen to me blather on about the book.  To arrive at a location only to discover that no one had come out to listen to me speak would have been quite awful.   

This is a fear that many authors have when touring.

A friend of mine recently went on a national book tour, something that has become a rarity in the publishing industry unless your book is on the bestseller list or you have won a prestigious award of some kind.  Her tour lasted three months, and when I asked her how it went, she said it was “horrendous.” 

Like me, she was fortunate enough to have audiences waiting for her wherever she spoke, but like me, those audiences sometimes numbered a handful of readers.  It’s one thing to drive an hour to speak to half a dozen people.  It’s another thing to fly across the country, sleeping in hotels every night for ninety days to do the same.  She told me that she’d never do another national tour again, and I could hardly blame her.  

With one book under my belt and a newfound band of loyal readers, I’m hoping for even larger audiences this summer.  Unlike many authors I know, I actually love speaking to people about my books, and the larger the crowd, the more excited I am.  But regardless of my past success, there will always be a small pit inside my belly as I pull into bookstores and libraries this summer as I wonder if anyone has bothered to show up.

Mystery writer Parnell Hall recently wrote a song and filmed a video that captures these emotions well.  He has been struggling on his book tour, though it appears from the video that rather than speaking, Hall is simply appearing to sign books. 

If this is the case, I think he’s doing himself a disservice.  An author is far more likely to garner an audience if he or she is planning to speak and take questions.  People like Mary Higgins Clark (who appears in Hall’s video) may be able to draw enormous crowds to a book signing, but until he (or I) has reached the lofty heights of a Mary Higgins Clark, we must put on a show and dance in order to convince readers that it’s worth their time to come out and listen to us speak.

Thankfully, I enjoy putting on a show and dance very much, and even when my books land on the bestseller list, I think I’ll still be dancing for my readers. 

How I found my literary agent

I spent this past week visiting the Lucy Robbins Welles Library in my hometown of Newington and the Portland Library in Portland, CT.  Both events were very well attended, and I had the chance to meet many readers who enjoyed SOMETHING MISSING and are anxious to get their hands on UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO. One of the most interesting comments made at both appearances came when I described the means by which I found my agent.  After being asked to describe the process, I explained that after finishing the book, I spent the summer identifying 200 potential literary agencies using the THE WRITER’S MARKET before winnowing the list down to the top 100.  From there, I began researching each literary agency, trying to identify the specific agent to whom my book would most appeal.

Using the Internet, I scoured the names of agents and then cross-referenced them on other websites for any information I could find that might tell me what their interests and preferences were.  For example, I identified Taryn, my agent, from more than half a dozen agents at her previous agency (she’s since gone on to start her own agency) using a number of factors.

First, she was young.  I knew I wanted to find someone who was new to the business and hungry.  At almost every agency, I addressed my query letter to one of the youngest agents on staff.

Second, I looked at the books that she had already worked on with other authors.  In Taryn’s case, there were two:  A book on compulsive hoarding and a book written by a woman who managed a solo crossing of the Atlantic Ocean in a rowboat.

Both books appealed to me.

I knew that my protagonist, Martin, was obsessive-compulsive and excessively methodical, and I thought that he might appeal to someone with an interest in and knowledge of compulsive hoarding.  The two seemed to fit together well, occupying the same space in a person’s mind.

I also liked the sound of a book about a woman rowing solo across an ocean.  Since so much of SOMETHING MISSING takes place in my protagonist's head, my manuscript was very light on dialogue, and I assumed that a book about a woman alone in the rowboat might also be dialogue-light.

Lastly, I liked the look of Taryn.  I found a photo of her online and thought that she looked like the kind of woman with whom I tend to be friends.  I know this is the least logical of my reasons for choosing her, but I believe that gut reactions are important.  I took one look at Taryn and thought that I might have a chance with her.

I followed this process for every one of the 100 queries I sent out that summer.  In many ways, it became a fulltime job for me.  It was two months of researching, tracking, analyzing, writing and assembling exactly what was requested by each agency.  A query letter and the first fifty pages to one agent, a query letter and the first three chapters to another, and a brief synopsis of the story to a third.  Each agency has its own specific requirements, and I catered each query letter to the agent I was addressing.

I described this process to the people who attended last week’s library events and received a similar reaction from both audiences:

People thought that my persistence, determination and attention to detail were remarkable.

I do not.

As I explained to one woman, I had just spent three years of my life committing 120,000 words to the blank page.  I had a story that I liked a lot, and I had always dreamed of becoming a published author.  Sending those letters in the manner that I did, maximizing my efforts in every way I knew possible, was simply a reasonable and practical approach to the challenge of finding an agent to represent my work.

To have done any less, I explained, would have been stupid.

Sadly, I have met many people who fail to work hard once their manuscript is complete.  A few months ago, I met a rather angry man who had sent out twelve query letters and had them all rejected.  I explained to him that I sent out 100 queries and was preparing to send 100 more when Taryn’s call finally came.  I told him that of the 100 queries, I received about 80 rejections, 10 non-responses, and 10 agents expressing some form of interest, albeit quite mild in most circumstances.  Ultimately it came down to about three agents who expressed some serious interest in the book, and Taryn’s call came on the last day of my summer vacation, which had been the target date that I had set for finding an agent.

I offered to help this angry man by offering some advice and proofreading his query letter, but he was hell-bent on having me walk his manuscript through the doors of Doubleday and plopping it on my editor’s desk.

If only it were that easy.

Ultimately I told the man that I would be happy to offer more advice once he sent out 88 more queries, thus matching my own total.  Not surprising, I have yet to hear from him.

When someone asks me for advice on finding a literary agent, I tell them this story, and more often than not, they tell me how they simply don’t have the time to undergo such a process.

Somehow, these people manage to find enough time to write a novel, an accomplishment in itself, but are unwilling to find the time to go the last mile.

My goal at book appearances like the ones I did last week is to present myself in as ordinary a fashion as possible.  I want aspiring writers to know that there is nothing special about the way in which I found my agent and ultimately got my books published.  It was good old fashioned hard work.

Nothing more.

Invariably, however, some member of the audience will raise a hand and attempt to refute my remarks as needlessly self-deprecating or silly, but I always do my best to swat those hands away.  If you’ve written a book and you think it’s good, do everything you can to get it published.  Send out 100 query letters, and be prepared to send out another 100 if needed.  Eventually, you might want to look into self-publishing, a means by which many authors are getting their work into the hands of readers today.

But please don’t spend months or years writing a book and then give up after twelve rejections.

Pressing on after hundreds of rejections demonstrates persistence.

To do any less demonstrates nothing more than a lack of desire.

To read or not to read

I’ll be speaking this evening at the Lucy Robbins Welles Library in my hometown of Newington at 7:00.  Topics for the evening will likely include my first novel, SOMETHING MISSING, my upcoming book (UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO), the writing process, and publishing in general, but since I never plan ahead and am often as surprised as my audience about what comes out of my mouth, who knows!

There may also be a few some high school students present who will be sharing their work for a couple of minutes apiece.  I recently finished a workshop at the local high school and invited any of the brave souls in attendance to join me this evening in order to read a bit of their work to the audience as well.

I hate reading from my own book.  I find it tedious and boring, and I almost always feel the same way when listening to other authors read.  I’d much prefer to listen to them talk about their lives, the ways in which they write, and the like.  I tend to love question-and-answer sessions, too, since that is where the wit of a writer are often exposed.

Or not. 

There’s nothing like watching someone attempt an unprepared response to some of the most lucid and inane questions ever formulated.  I tend to adore the question-and-answer sessions of my own readings as well, because this is where I discover what people really want to hear. 

Do you feel the same way about authors reading from their work?  Do you enjoy listening to them read for fifteen or twenty minutes at a clip, which many do?  Or would you prefer to just listen to the story about how their book came into being and what it is like being a writer?

Just curious.

Upcoming events

Next month I will be speaking at my hometown library as part of a program that is geared at offering an education in writing and publishing to anyone interested in attending.  Local author Peter Cimini will talk about writing his first novel, THE SECRET OF OPI on March 22, and I will follow up his talk with one of my own on Wednesday, March 31. 

It appears that a large number of people have already registered for both events (though registration is not required), so it should be a fun evening of discussion.  if you’re in the area, drop on by and say hello.

In conjunction with the program, I will also be conducting a pair of evening classes on writing with local high school students as well.  While I adore my job as a fifth grade teacher, I can also see myself teaching high school or college English someday, so these classes should give me an interesting peek into the world of the high school English student.

Additional information about these upcoming events can be found in a recent article in the New Britain Herald.

Ten minutes at a time

“What the writer needs is an empty day ahead.”  CATHERINE DRINKER BOWEN

I saw this quote in my Twitter feed recently and thought, “No, No! No!”

A couple weeks ago, I was in Vermont with a handful of other authors, speaking about our books and writing.  During the question-and-answer session, an audience  member asked about when we write.  Specifically, do we write on a regular schedule, or do we write in bursts of creativity?  It’s a question commonly asked by readers, but it was the first time I had the opportunity to listen to other writers answer it.  In our group of five, at least three of the authors work on their craft fulltime, describing long mornings in which their writing takes place, followed by leisurely lunches and afternoons of writing and revision.  They travel to writer’s retreats for weeks at a time, work in offices away from the hustle and bustle of home and are otherwise unencumbered by the demands of other employers.

As I listened to them describe the lives as fulltime writers, I suddenly felt the need to leap from my wobbly chair and silence them.  Though I was indescribably envious of their ability to spend their days writing, this envy had nothing to do with my desire to stop them from speaking.  Instead, this desire was born from a need to protect the audience from the most common misconception of writing.

It’s been my experience that the most widespread reason for people not writing is a lack of time.  Prospective-authors envision writing as requiring three hour blocks of uninterrupted silence in the middle of the day.  With a family and a fulltime job, most people cannot find a way to carve out this kind of time from their already busy schedules. 

I understand this dilemma well.  As a teacher, I work fulltime, leaving the house around 7:00 every morning and arriving home after work and a stop at the gym around 5:00 every afternoon.  I also own a mobile DJ company and entertain at about thirty weddings a year.  Each of these weddings require me to meet with clients at least once before the actual wedding, taking more time away from writing.  As a secular minister, I even marry people at some of these weddings, necessitating even more meetings.  And I have a couple other irons in the fire as well in terms of business. In short, I’m a busy guy.

I also have a one-year-old daughter who keeps me quite busy, and I still make time to play golf, poker and basketball with friends quite regularly.  I’m a member of a book club and read a lot, and I own a dog who I walk twice a day.

As I said, I’m a busy guy.

Finding a three-hour, uninterrupted block of time for writing is rarely possible in my life.  Hell, even an hour is sometimes impossible to find.  Yet I’ve written two novels and am about to finish my third, all in the span on about four years.

How have I accomplished this?

By writing whenever and wherever I can.  Oftentimes this means writing for incredibly short periods of time: ten to twenty minutes in many cases.  But I never allow the length of time available to me to be an excuse not to write. 

I write in the morning, between walking the dog and leaving for work (as I’m doing right now).  I write during my lunch break.  I write for ten minutes while my wife is finishing dinner.  I write for the forty-five minutes that my daughter is still napping.  I write for fifteen minutes while waiting for a meeting to begin.  I write for twenty minutes while waiting for a wedding to begin.  I write in waiting rooms, train stations, hotel lobbies, McDonald’s restaurants and highway rest areas.

Wherever I can, and whenever I can, I cobble the time together to write my stories. 

Would I like to write fulltime?  Of course.  In addition to my fiction, I have a cartload of other projects that I’d love to be working on.  But for now, I stick to fiction because that is what pays the bills and allows my wife to stay home with our daughter.  Perhaps someday in the future, I will have the same opportunities as my fellow Vermont writers, but until I do, ten minutes here, an hour there, and the occasional lunch break will have to do, as it should for you.

If you have ever dreamed of writing and cannot find the time, make the time.  Cobble together little bits of your day, writing a paragraph or even a sentence at a time if necessary.

No excuses. 

Long days, spacious offices and lovely, seaside views are wonderful, but Stephen King began his career beside a washing machine and John Grisham wrote his first novel on a legal pad while eating.  I wrote mine on a laptop that I drag with me wherever I go.  SOMETHING MISSING was written at the kitchen table, in the teacher’s lunch room, and on planes and trains.  I wrote while waiting to be married, while on my honeymoon and every day in before and after. 

I was working on my second book, UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO, between my wife’s contractions during the birth of our daughter.

So please don’t start believing that the scene must be perfectly set before you begin scribbling with your pencil or pounding at the keys.  Let the world be your office, and make the time that you have count. 

Write for ten minutes if that’s all that you have.  Write one sentence a day if necessary.  But please don’t wait for the ideal writing situation.  Most ideal situations are the product of years of less-than-ideal situations.   

Fresh Voices 2010

I’ve spent the last two days in Chester, Vermont, at Misty Valley Books Fresh Voices 2010, a remarkable weekend-long event that showcases new authors to the community. Lynne and Bill Reed, owners of the bookstore, have run this event for years and have done an amazing job bringing authors and the public together for a weekend of food, drink, conversation and fun.

It was also the first time that Elysha and I left our daughter overnight, but we’ve been receiving photos from her grandparents all weekend long and she is doing remarkably well.

  

Too well, in fact. It would seem that we were not the center of her universe after all. I find myself both pleased and a little angry by her lack of crying all weekend.

Doesn’t she know what she’s missing?

It’s now 5:30 AM on Sunday morning and I find myself in the lobby of the hotel adjacent to the bookstore, sitting at a small table, pecking away at my keyboard while everyone else still sleeps. In a few hours Elysha and I will leave Chester to pick up our daughter, and while I can’t wait to see Clara, it’s a little sad that such an enjoyable weekend is coming to an end.

Some of the highlights included:

On Saturday morning, in temperatures near zero, we spent a couple hours cross country skiing at Grafton Ponds. It was the first time that any of us had been on cross country skis, so our instructor, Betsy, spent the entire time with us, teaching the finer points of the sport. I am happy to report that I didn’t fall once, though I was clearly the worst skier of the bunch, no matter what Heidi Durrow might tell you. I couldn’t strap on my skis without assistance, I heard my name shouted more than any other and I was asked at one point if I “often have a hard time with athletic activities.”

Still, I’ll do it again, hopefully when it’s a little warmer.

I thought it was a little odd for Bill and Lynne to send four authors out for a cross country ski lesson together, wondering how it fit into such airy and lofty topics as literature and writing and publishing.  But I soon realized the method behind their madness. By strapping long sticks onto four nervous authors’ feet and sending them out sliding across snow and ice together, we bonded in a way that could have never happened had we hung around the hotel all day, waiting for our opportunity to speak. Thrust a handful of strangers into a new situation and they must immediately rely upon one another for support, humor, comfort and survival.  This is exactly what happened.  We arrived at Grafton Ponds that morning as five authors who knew a little bit about one another but left with burgeoning friendships. 

We’ve also had the opportunity to spend time with the Chester community, first at dinner on Friday night in the home of Lynne and Bill, then at Grafton Ponds, where the public was invited to join us, and later at a reception following our readings and dinner on Saturday night. It’s an engaging and welcoming community that opened their doors to us and made us feel right at home. 

But the highlight of the weekend was getting to know the four other authors who I was fortunate enough to join on this adventure. Each is a gifted writer and an impressive human being.  On Saturday afternoon we made our way to the Stone Church to speak to a packed house. It was terrific.  Each presentation was remarkably unique and interesting and thoroughly captivated me, and this is saying something.  I find many authors to be dry, dusty, and terrified when they stand before a large audience, but not these four.

Deborah Copaken Kogan, a no-nonsense writer, photographer, and former war correspondent, talked about the journalistic approach that she took to her first novel, which is based upon the murder of her childhood friend.  From all accounts, it’s a beautifully written and haunting novel that I am both anxious and afraid to read, given my new-father status and my newfound sensitivity to stories like this.

Elena Gorokhova, a Russian immigrant who studied English while at the University of Leningrad, discussed her memoir about life in the Soviet Union before Perestroika with humor and insight that could only come from someone living there at the time.  My wife has already decided to choose her book for our next book club selection.    

Heidi Durrow, winner of the Bellwether Prize in Fiction and doing the first reading of her career (her book officially comes out next month), spoke with remarkable skill and flair, convincing me that she should have been the one to record the audio book version of her novel.  While I’m looking forward to reading her book, I wish that she would read it to me.  She was that good. 

Jim Landis, a gifted writer and thinker, spoke in a way that left you laughing, thinking, and pondering the nature of man and religion, all while remaining highly entertained.  Not an easy task.  His book reportedly has a surprise ending, but the beginning section that he read to us was enough to hook me.  I started his book tonight.   

I am honored to think of each one of these authors as my peers, colleagues and friends, and plans are already in the works to return to New Voices 2011 next year, so that we can sit in the pews at the Stone Church and listen to another batch of Bill and Lynne’s new authors share their stories with us.

Betsy even promised to give Clara her first skiing lesson, too.

If you’re interested in these author’s books (and you really should be), they are:

Jim Landis: THE LAST DAY

Heidi Durrow: THE GIRL WHO FELL FROM THE SKY

Deborah Copaken Kogan: BETWEEN HERE AND APRIL, as well as her bestselling memoir SHUTTERBABE and HELL IS OTHER PARENTS

Elena Gorokhova: A MOUNTAIN OF CRUMBS

And please allow me to add Denise Landis (Jim’s wife) and her cookbook, DINNER FOR EIGHT to the list. 

And if you find yourself in Chester, Vermont in need of a book or a warm place to browse, be sure to stop by Misty Valley Books.  In addition to a fine selection of books, Bill and Lynne also give French lessons and sell magic carpets, children’s puzzles (we bought one for Clara that I cannot reassemble), local art, and calendars of every shape and size.

Be sure to ask Bill to see his Mr. November photo from this year’s calendar.  You’ll be glad you did.

On our way to Misty Valley Books!

This weekend, my wife and I will be traveling to Chester, Vermont, leaving our one-year-old daughter behind for the first time.  I am appearing with five other first-time novelists at a two-day event known as New Voices, sponsored by Misty Valley Books. 

Clara will be staying with her grandparents for the weekend.  While Elysha and I are thrilled to have the opportunity to participate in this extraordinary event, we’re also dreading the prospect of leaving our little one behind.  Oddly enough, we’re not worried about her safety or happiness.  She adores her grandparents and we know that she will be well cared for.  We’re worried that we’ll miss her to death and find ourselves moaning in bed at night, wracked by unbearable waves of Clara withdrawal.

Hopefully we’ll make it through the weekend without too much suffering.    

The event is open to the public free of charge and will begin at 2 PM in the First Universalist Church in Chester’s Stone Village. A reception organized by members of the church and a book signing will follow the session in the church’s basement.

The public is also invited to snowshoe or cross-country ski with the authors on Saturday morning at Grafton Ponds in Grafton and have lunch with them around the fire in the lodge there.

Following the afternoon sessions, the public can also dine with the authors at the Fullerton Inn, on the Green next to Misty Valley Books.

I’ve spent the evening reading about the other authors involved in the program, and I can’t wait to meet them  and pick their brains.  All seem utterly fascinating and quite accomplished.  I’m feeling very fortunate to have been invited.     

More information, including a list of authors and details about the events, can be found here.

What to say?

I’m still looking for a clever, witty, possibly subversive message to replace my standard “Thanks for reading my story” when singing a book.  

My wife likes “Buy another one” or “Makes a great gift”. While I love her for comments like this, even I may pass on this suggestion. 

Any ideas?

Great literary opportunities tomorrow!

I will be appearing at the Barnes and Noble bookstore in Blueback Square in West Hartford, CT on Saturday at 4:00 for anyone interested in attending. 

My wife, the amateur publicist, actually set up this event without even telling me, and she also managed to get it mentioned in the Hartford Courant.

It’s good to have people working for you.  

Unfortunately, the appearance was mentioned in a section of the paper which also noted the University of Connecticut’s 18th Annual Connecticut Children's Book Fair, where well known authors and illustrators will present talks and sign books on Saturday as well.

As much I love meeting and speaking to readers, this event also sounds quite appealing, and with plans on someday publishing a children’s book or two, I kind of wish that I could this book fair instead.

Thankfully, the fact that it’s been going on for eighteen years bodes well for a future opportunity at attendance. 

On good authority, I haven’t changed a bit

During my appearance at Renaissance Books on Saturday, I was asked to explain the reasoning behind choosing the section of SOMETHING MISSING that I read aloud to audiences.

Personally, I find the actual reading of the book to be the most boring part of any author’s appearance, my own included. I would much prefer to plug my iPhone into a docking station and play a portion of the audio book, read by the talented Jefferson Mayes, instead. As an audience member and an author, I much prefer the variety and spontaneity of the question-and-answer portion of an author’s appearance to be the most entertaining. As such, I try to keep the reading as short as possible. In answer to this woman’s question, I confessed that my publicist had recommended the section that I read after I was unable to identify a suitable passage on my own.

She then followed up her question by asking if I had to choose a section of the book to read, what would it have been?

“The last ten pages,” I answered.

“Is this because the end is your favorite part?”

“No,” I said. “I just want to spoil the ending for everyone.”

With the utmost sincerity, another audience member asked, “Why would you want to do that?”

“Because that’s just the kind of guy I am.”

From the back of the room, Mrs. Allan, my former middle school teacher, grumbled, “He hasn’t changed a bit.”

As odd as it may seem, I find great comfort in knowing that my occasionally sarcastic, slightly rude, and less-than-conforming nature is not something new.

Hometown appearance

I spent Saturday in my hometown of Blackstone, MA, speaking about Something Missing to audiences in the Blackstone Public Library and then down the road at Renaissance Books in Uxbridge, MA. There were great turnouts for both events, thanks in part to Stacy Juba, a local author who arranged the appearances, promoted them aggressively, and spoke alongside me. Oddly enough, the library stands on the former site of my middle school, and before that, my father’s high school. It was quite surreal to return to a space that I once occupied as a student in order to share my novel with an enthusiastic audience. I have many memories from that AF Maloney Middle School, which was raised in order to construct one of the finest small town libraries that I have ever seen. One of my most distinct memories is of the playground, which consisted of a patch of blacktop that was backed by a dirt field. A white line was painted across the pavement, dividing the playground into a boy’s side and a girl’s side, with the patch of dirt in the back reserved for the boys who used it for football and soccer games.

The fact that we still enjoyed recess in middle school is incomprehensible to my current students.

The fact that boys and girls could not play together is still incomprehensible to me.

The fact that boys were allotted twice as much space than the girls was incomprehensible to me even as I enjoyed this unfair benefit as a ten-year-old.

I also had a science teacher (Mr. Morin) who required you to raise your dominant hand (left for me, right for most) and a math teacher who played Dungeons & Dragons with students during study hall. Lunches were cooked at the high school and eaten in the classroom, and as a member of the top group of fourth graders (students were sorted by academic ability back then), my class was sent to middle school a year ahead of the rest of kids in our grade.

Strange times indeed.

One of the most enjoyable aspects of Saturday’s visit was the number of old friends and teachers who were kind enough to attend, some of whom have actually played a role in the writing of Something Missing and Unexpectedly, Milo.

Mr. Compopiano, the high school English teacher who is mentioned in the Acknowledgements of Something Missing, stopped by prior to my appearance to say hello.

Laura, my high school sweetheart and the girl from whom Martin’s girlfriend, Laura, derives her name, also stopped by with her sister and mother. I haven’t seen Laura in years, so it was great to spend some time together.

Wendy, whose last name is used for a minor character in Unexpectedly, Milo, also attended the reading. Wendy and I attended our Sophomore Semi-Formal together (she brought photos from that evening to show my wife), and she was also kind enough to bring a photograph of me and Patty Catalano, on stage during the elementary school spring concert. By order of our music teacher, Mrs. Carroll, I kissed Patty at the end of our song and dance number while Wendy was being kissed by a boy named Danny. This turned out to be my very first kiss, onstage of all places, and it was probably Patty’s as well.

I’m sure it’s all been downhill for Patty since that fateful spring evening.

I also saw my high school friend, Jim, who actually appears, alongside his mother, as a minor character in Unexpectedly, Milo.

Later on in the afternoon, during my appearance at Renaissance Books, I was greeted by Mrs. Allen, my middle school social studies teacher. Mrs. Allen’s classroom was formally the middle school’s undersized auditorium, and as a result, she had a stage in her classroom, which was one of the most beautiful and unique classrooms that I have ever seen. Mrs. Allen’s classroom, and specifically her stage, served as the inspiration for the stage that I now have in my fifth grade classroom.

Little did she know how much influence she might have on one of her former students.

In addition to former classmates and teachers, I met a whole bunch of new people, many of whom have read Something Missing and enjoyed it a great deal.  I met a woman whose book club just met about the book last week, as well as a man who is currently reading the book to his 85-year old father.

Many thanks to Stacy Juba and her husband, a teacher at my former high school, who were kind enough to make the day possible.

My hometown

Tomorrow I will be heading to my hometown of Blackstone, MA to join local author Stacy Juba in a joint appearance at the Blackstone Public Library and Renaissance Books in Uxbridge, MA.

If you’d like to stop by, we’ll be at the Blackstone Public Library from 12:30-2:00, speaking, reading, answering questions, and signing books.  Then we’ll be down the road in Uxbridge at 3:00 for another appearance at the local bookstore.  

My sister lives one town over from our hometown, so I occasionally return to my old stomping grounds, but almost always just to pass through.  But this time it’s likely that I will see some old faces and have the opportunity to say hello to some old friends.

I can’t wait. 

I can remember my version of the Blackstone Public Library well:

A small, one room library located on the first floor of the Town Hall and containing, if memory serves me correctly, a total of six to eight stacks of books. 

Not a lot in comparison to many of the libraries of today.

As I recall, the room was also poorly lighted, less-than-inviting, and contained almost no place to sit and read a book.  It was strictly a get-your-book-and-go operation.  

Yet I adored the library as a kid.  Having grown up in a house with few books and almost no children’s books, the Blackstone Public Library’s collection of books was enormous in my eyes.  I remember riding my bike to Town Hall the first time, signing up for a blue library card, and choosing my first book.  The title has escaped me for years, but it was a science fiction story in which all the tallest buildings in the world have begun to melt from the top in rivulets of silver and black.  From what can recall, aliens were attempting to save the human race by halting industrial progress and returning the world to a simpler time, which included buildings no higher than two stories.  I’m pretty sure that humankind ultimately agreed with the aliens and bowed to their demands.

I’ve looked for the title and author of this book many times without success.  If anyone knows it, please let me know.

I wonder if the library still owns a copy of the book. 

That was just the beginning of a childhood adventure with books.  I can remember feverishly going through the library’s Stephen King collection and discovering THE LORD OF THE RINGS for the first time.  I recall asking the librarian for any more Douglas Adams books and being disappointed in discovering that there was no sequel to LORD OF THE FLIES. 

I loved that tiny library. 

Apparently, my tiny library no longer exists, replaced by a free-standing building that seems to be located on the site of my old middle school (and my father’s old high school), making tomorrow’s experience even more surreal.

Of course, there’s a brand new elementary school on the street that I grew up on, named after my old elementary school principal, making the whole town seem like from another time to me, so perhaps the middle school turned library isn’t so strange after all. 

I have some great stories about AF Maloney Middle School to share someday.

And hopefully I’ll have some great stories about tomorrow’s appearance to share next week.

Briarwood and Beyond, but no coffee, please.

A couple nights ago, when I wasn’t hacking up a lung, I attended the Briarwood and Beyond Book Club meeting where SOMETHING MISSING was the book being discussed. I’ve attended several bookclubs over the past few months and this one was especially fun. About a dozen enthusiastic women, some of whom I already knew, anxious to talk about the book, the publishing industry, the writing process, and more. The members had written down questions prior to my arrival, but even with the cards in hand, the questions came fast and furious.

And I was asked some fascinating questions:

Is there anything about Martin that I did not like?

Was the process of writing SOMETHING MISSING therapeutic in terms of my PTSD?

How does Martin feel about his mother?

We spoke at length about the book and specifically about Martin, and there was much debate over whether or not he is a hero. Some found Martin to be more creepy and selfish than genuinely heroic, while others actually wished that they could be one of his clients.

One woman in particular seemed to have an actual crush on my protagonist.

The conversation later turned to my writing process, and specifically to the means by which I manage to teach, write, own a business, care for my baby daughter, and accomplish all the other things that I manage to do with just twenty-four hours in a day. This is a question that I get a lot considering how much I do, and my answer is often the same:

I don’t sleep much and I’m very efficient.

Efficiency is also a hallmark in Martin’s life, and so began a discussion about how mundane decisions like opening email only when you are prepared to respond and delete and changing your clothing beside the hamper in order to avoid having to move dirty clothing twice can add up to genuine time savings. Having worked at McDonald’s for almost a decade, I learned about the importance of routine and the elimination of unnecessary steps, and as a result, I honestly believe that I am more efficient than most.

But efficiency is difficult to codify. Some have suggested that I simply process information quickly. Others have posited that I prioritize effectively. A few have even attributed by efficiency to things like my willingness to delegate, by embrace of minimalism, and a high energy level. While all this may contribute to my ability to accomplish much in a short period of time, I often think that routine and the elimination of unnecessary steps in the most mundane of tasks helps the most.

So it came as no surprise when I refused the offer for coffee later in the night, since coffee is the least efficient of all drinks. In addition to not liking its taste, I think coffee is a pain-in-the-ass. Elysha accused me of feeling this way because I don’t like the substance, but this is not true. I hate broccoli, but I don’t think it’s a pain-in-the-ass.

The problem with coffee begins with a coffee drinker’s predilection for a specific brand of coffee. On any given Sunday morning, Elysha and I can drive past a dozen different places that sell coffee and still not arrive at the one place that will satisfy her craving. It seems silly to a non-coffee drinker that this magically-addicting drink can be so tasty in one location yet so undesirable at another. Honestly? It’s coffee. It comes from the same damn plant. How can it be so good in one place and so bad in another?

Of course, once you’ve arrived at your ideal location, things aren’t necessarily good. Coffee requires an arsenal of accoutrements, and missing even one can throw this perfect blend of goodness into disaster. Does the coffee house have Equal or Splenda? Sweet and Low or just plain sugar? Is the cream 1% or 2%? Do they have whole milk? If you are missing just one of these vital ingredients, which seem to be in constant flux, the whole coffee experience can be ruined.

And the choices that need to be made are just outrageous. When I order coffee for Elysha at Starbucks, I have to ask for a medium vanilla latte, 2 percent, sugar free. I can think of no other food product that I order that requires this much specificity. And I’ve been told that this is a relatively simple order. I could be answering questions about foam/no foam and whether I want 1 or 2 shots of more than a dozen different syrups. Or about whip cream and caramel or a hundred other things. It must take months of experimentation for a coffee drinker to discover what he or she actually likes.

Lastly, as a non-coffee drinker, I am continually discriminated against. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been at a meeting or driven by a rest stop that has offered free coffee but not any free soda, juice, or even water. The assumption is that everyone drinks coffee, but in reality, a little less than a quarter of all Americans do not.

Including me.

It tastes yucky, and I simply do not have time for it.

Many hands make light work

Writing is not always a solitary process.

In addition to a crew of faithful readers who are kind enough to read my books as I write them, chapter by chapter, I also have a stable of readers who are nice enough to help me with my blog as well, offering me editing and revising suggestions when needed.  My wife is often my first line of defense against my typical typos and other blunders, but lately, others have joined in the fray.  A European reader has most recently been the first to fire me an email when I make an error on the blog, and other friends step up from time to time as well. 

All are consistently and remarkably insightful in their suggestions for revision, as my good friend, Charles, was this morning, when he wrote:

“In your post "Kudos from readers in Greece and Norway" you use the word alternate twice.  The correct word is alternative.

I am somewhat shocked though.  I just looked it up on Merriam-Webster.com and they list that alternate is acceptable usage.  I guess since so many people have used alternate erroneously in place of alternative that the definition has been added.  Strunk and White definitely don't concur with this.  Alternate implies a cyclic change (from Latin alternus: "one after the other"), whereas alternative means a choice between two options.”

And to think I get editing advice like this for free…

Like Charles, I do not like it when errors are made acceptable based upon the frequency of their usage.  My least favorite commonly accepted error pertains to the phrase “beg the question,” which does not mean to raise or illicit elicit a question, no matter how many newspaper writers, television reporters, politicians, or NPR correspondents use it this way.

The correct definition, from http://begthequestion.info, is:

Begging the question is a form of logical fallacy in which a statement or claim is assumed to be true without evidence other than the statement or claim itself. When one begs the question, the initial assumption of a statement is treated as already proven without any logic to show why the statement is true in the first place.

A simple example would be "I think he is unattractive because he is ugly." The adjective "ugly" does not explain why the subject is "unattractive" -- they virtually amount to the same subjective meaning, and the proof is merely a restatement of the premise. The sentence has begged the question.

If you could join me in the crusade to rid the world of this improper usage, I’d greatly appreciate it.

Borders Books in Farmington, CT

On Sunday I made an appearance at Borders Books and Music right down the road from my school. As always, I spoke for a while, read a little bit from SOMETHING MISSING, took some questions from the audience, recommended a few books, and finished off with a brief signing.

This was my most local appearance so far, just ten minutes from my home, so my wife and daughter were able to attend as well.  I can’t tell you how fun it is to see my daughter sitting in the audience, listening to me share stories about the book, even if she spends much of the time babbling and fidgeting in her mother’s arms. 

As a result of the bookstore’s proximity to home, there were many recognizable faces in the audience that day.  Friends, colleagues, and students (current and former) were mixed in with a few nonpartisans, and it made for a much more informal and casual atmosphere.  Adults and kids asked lots of questions, and many of them were quite insightful.

In my last few appearances (including this one), budding writers have been asking me about my writing process, specifically inquiring about my preference of the keyboard versus the pen. While this question seems innocent enough, I’ve gotten a sense that these people are searching for the right answer, longing for the means by which their work might instantly improve.

I’m a keyboard man.  Unless I’m writing short poetry, which I will do from time to time (I’m currently working on a poem about a boy named Gilly who tastes his cremated grandfather’s ashes out of curiosity), I am always composing on a laptop.  But I don’t think this is necessarily the correct way to write.  While I cannot imagine writing fiction longhand, am I expected to believe that Shakespeare’s work would have been any better had he been writing on a MacBook Pro?

I doubt it.  

Unfortunately, I don’t think it works that way, and these writers, hoping for a quick and easy solution to their writing struggles, are out of luck. 

Unless, of course, you believe Charles Bukowski, who discovered word processing at the age of seventy.

Water Street Books

I spent last night at Water Street Books in Exeter, NH, discussing SOMETHING MISSING with a group of enthusiastic readers.  It’s a wonderful independent bookstore located along a quaint little street lined with shops and restaurants, and its owner, Dan, is as enthusiastic about books as they come.

Among the audience members was Brooks Sigler, author of FIVE FINGERED FICTION, and the person most responsible for arranging my appearance.  Even though we had not met until last night, she has been an amazing supporter of my work.  Brooks is the kind of writer who understands the importance of a writing community and looks to forge relationships with fellow writers.

Having gotten to know and spend some time with several writers since the publishing of my book, including Margot Berwin, Andrew Clements, and Elinor Lipman, I’ve found it incredibly rewarding and enlightening to discuss writing and the publishing industry with them.  Being an author is oftentimes a lonely gig, so even the short time I spent with Brooks last night was quite fun.  And though I ordered her book months ago, I will finally take it down off the shelf and begin reading now. 

My wife and I have been invited to a writer’s retreat in January, hosted by the owners of a Vermont bookstore, and I can’t wait.  I’ll be joining about half a dozen new authors for a weekend of dining, skiing, and talking about our books.

I can’t wait.  I don’t ski, but still, it sounds like fun.  I was once warned that skiing is like cocaine.  It’s expensive, addictive, and eventually you will get hurt.  This warning, combined with bad knees from years of missing the pole vaulting mats, has kept me off the slopes.  But the chance to meet some authors and discuss our books sounds perfect to me.

And if you are ever in Exeter, NH, be sure to stop by Water Street Books, say hello to Dan and pick up FIVE FINGERED FICTION.  There’s a large, comfy couch in the back where I settled in last night and wrote about 500 words of THE CHICKEN SHACK prior to the appearance.

I highly recommend it.  

Death is not a deterrent

Whenever I speak about my book at a bookstore or library, I always encourage the members of my audience to begin writing.  I tell them that anyone is capable of writing if they apply themselves, and I mean it.  I think everyone should be working on a book.  Regardless of a person’s level of skill or experience, everyone has a story, whether it be fiction or otherwise. 

Too few people take the time to commit these stories to paper.  

Following my appearance at the retirement community on Monday, I found myself engaged in a conversation with an 86-year old woman, a former chaplain who once wrote sermons and the occasional Op-Ed piece in her youth.  She told me that she was thinking about writing a memoir and hoped to get around to it “someday.”

“But dear,” I said, calculating a means by which I might not offend.  “You’re 86-years old.  Do you really think you should be waiting?”

“What are you trying to say?” she asked.  “Do you think I’m going to die tomorrow?”

“Well, you have a better chance of dying tomorrow than most people, so yeah.  Maybe. I hope not, but you never know.  For someone your age, shouldn’t you be thinking that there’s no time like the present?”

“I got plenty of years left on these bones, young man.”

“If you say so,” I said, conceding the fight but not at all happy about it.    

I have at least two friends who I have been trying to convince to get writing without much success.  Both are talented writers with stories to share, but so far, they haven’t scrawled even a single sentence that they are willing to share with me.

But if I can’t get an 86-year old woman to feel a sense of urgency, what chance do I have with a stubborn procrastinator and an under-confident slacker, both still in their thirties?

Not much, I’m afraid.

Visiting Westport with Margot Berwin

Last night author Margot Berwin and I spoke about our recently published novels at the Westport Public Library in Westport, CT. As was the case a few weeks ago when we both appeared at the Wilton Library, it was great to be able to sit alongside Margot as we discussed our books, the publishing process, and writing in general. Knowing very few authors, I look forward to the opportunity to swap stories with writers and am always surprised to discover how many simultaneous similarities and differences exist in our professional lives.

In addition to talking about our books and reading a bit, Margot and I took questions from our audience. Ironically, I was asked the same question that I asked Nicholson Baker just a couple weeks ago: Do your readers project certain characteristics of your protagonist upon you? In Baker’s case, I was specifically wondering about THE FERMATA, the story of a man who can stop time in order to undress woman.

Baker’s answer was a qualified yes (the ability to stop time in order to undress women was Baker’s adolescent fantasy), and mine was an unqualified absolutely. Friends, relatives, newspaper reporters, and even a few readers who have taken the time to write to me have asked me if I have ever engaged in burglary in the past, and a handful have openly doubted my innocence.

But I also admitted that projecting certain aspects of my protagonist upon me makes perfect sense. Martin, Milo (who you will meet next summer) and Wyatt, the protagonist in my current manuscript, all possess certain character traits that are my own. Some are written about intentionally, but others, as improbable as it may seem, were unconscious in the making.

For example, as I think I’ve written about before, many of the strategies that Martin utilizes in his career; his excessive planning, his methodical routines, and his constant vigilance, are qualities that I developed while dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder. But as I imbued Martin with these characteristics, I was blind to their presence in my life.

Martin and I are also about the same age, and Martin lives in the same apartment that I lived in back in 2003.

Martin has a father who he has not seen in more than twenty years. Until recently, I also had not seen my father in almost twenty years, yet this similarity in family circumstance went unnoticed by me during the writing of the book, as impossible as that may seem. And in a bizarre fiction-meets-reality scenario, like Martin, I was recently reunited with my father, partly because of the book.

Even our names are unintentionally (though my former therapist might argue subconsciously) similar.

Yes, my readers project certain character traits from my protagonist onto me, and yes, they rightly should in many cases.

How many similarities do Milo and I share? I’m not sure. Milo is facing the prospect of divorce, and several years ago I went through a divorce as well. We both love our dogs. We both love hot dogs.

As for the rest?

I’ll wait for people who know me better to illuminate me on other, unintentional similarities next summer when the book is published.

Does the multiple-author format make more sense?

Last night’s appearance at the Wilton Library was delightful, and many thanks to the staff at the library for putting this event together.  I sat on a panel of first time authors, and we spent the evening talking about our books, the process by which each of us was published, and answering lots of interesting and insightful questions.  There was a very large and engaging audience, and despite not seeing my wife and daughter for most of the day, the experience couldn’t have been more enjoyable. 

Sitting on the panel with me were authors Jessica Bram and Margot Berwin.  Jessica is the author of HAPPILY EVER AFTER DIVORCE: NOTES OF A JOYFUL JOURNEY, a nonfiction string of interconnected essays dealing with her experiences with divorce.  She also served as moderator for the discussion and teaches writing classes through the Westport Writer’s Workshop.  The book sounds interesting and somewhat unique in that it captures the positive side that a divorce can sometimes offer, a fact to which I can heartily attest as well. 

Mergot Berwin is the author of HOTHOUSE FLOWER AND THE NINE PLANTS OF DESIRE, and it turns out that she and I are a lot alike in terms of our writing process and thoughts on the publishing world.  Like me, she does not outline her plots ahead of time, and as a result, her first drafts tend to meander a bit, as do mine.  Her road to becoming a published author is an entertaining and inspiring story, and most impressively, HOTHOUSE FLOWER is the third novel that she has written but the first that has been sold.  I give her a great deal of credit for her tenacity and persistence.  While I like to think that I would have continued to write even if SOMETHING MISSING had not been published (and I did begin UNEXPECTEDLY, MILO on the same day that I finished writing SOMETHING MISSING, long before an offer on the book was ever made), I’m not sure about the degree of enthusiasm and diligence that I could have mustered knowing that there were two other manuscripts sitting in a drawer somewhere, unsold.

As the night wrapped up, I couldn’t help but think that perhaps the multiple author appearance could be a better way for authors and booksellers to guarantee larger, more engaging audiences at events like these.  Unless you are a bestselling author or well known personality, there’s always the chance that you’ll arrive at a bookstore or a library and find two people waiting to hear you speak, one who nods off during your talk and the other who realizes halfway through the reading that they are in the wrong place.  While this has thankfully not happened to me (yet), it’s always something I dread.  But in partnering up with another author, as I will be doing with appearances in October in MA and NH, you increase your chances at larger, more enthusiastic audiences, and while you may sacrifice a little face time in the process, the interest and chemistry that two or more authors can create may outweigh a slightly shorter time in which to speak.          

Right?

Along this vein, I will be partnering up with local authors in MA and NH, some who are working with very small, independent publishers and who will most certainly bring in a sizable audience of family and friends to these appearances.  Guaranteed warm bodies right off the bat.  And while a large percentage of the audience will be there to specifically listen to and support my partnering author, I will have the opportunity to introduce myself and my book to an entirely new set of potential readers.

It makes a lot of sense to me.  Am I missing anything?