Now I have to worry about falling cows. Great.

The Telegraph reports on a Brazilian man who died after a cow fell through his roof and landed on top of him.

As a person who suffers from an ongoing, intense existential crisis, the last thing I want to hear about is a new way to die.

The world is perilous enough already.

From The Telegraph:

Mr. de Souza's brother-in-law Carlos Correa told Brazil's Hoje em Dia newspaper: "Being crushed by a cow in your bed is the last way you expect to leave this earth.

His grieving mother, Maria de Souza, told Brazil's SuperCanal TV channel: "I didn't bring my son up to be killed by a falling cow."

I agree with both of them. There are certain things in life that we should not be worried about. Falling cows is one of them.

The fact that I engaged in a few spirited sessions of cow tipping as a youth does not make me feel any better.

Karma can be a killer. And it’s patient as hell.

Brazil seeks to increase intelligence by banning indoor tanning. At least that’s my guess.

Brazil is the first country in the world to ban indoor tanning for anyone of any age.

Good for Brazil. Perhaps this was an attempt to increase the average IQ of their population. By eliminating tanning completely, it forces their stupidest citizen to leave the country.

I know I’ve written about it before (including 7 perfectly good reasons why the use of a tanning booth is acceptable), but seriously, is there anything stupider than tanning?